Let's chat: The Older Man

[JFemme]

Ebony, you are cracking me up...

If DH and I were to split, I'd never date older, older...

The stories I hear from 60-70 year old women are insane/scary/full of nursing.*shivers*

 

[lexi08]

I have have a question? How old is too old for most ladies? Is 10 years older (or less) too much.....

 

[Ramya]

I've always had an affinity toward older men. I'm 21 and I tend to attract men 30+. Boo #2 is 33. I just can't help it. They tend to give me what I want on all levels. Most of the guys my age in my area just don't have it like that.

ETA: I do have to be careful with me being so young that there is no daddy-daughter type dynamic going on.

 

[Transformer]

I have have a question? How old is too old for most ladies? Is 10 years older (or less) too much.....

I'm not taking any chances.....five years older is the max for me. By the way, I don't like younger men either. I would not date a man that was more than 1 year younger.

DH is 18 months older than I. I'm one of those people that age is more than just a number and that it does matter.

Look at this way, we always evaluate mates for potential. We look at the prospect and say, "where will this man be financially, physically, and mentally in the next say.....5-10-15 years. Dating a 61 year old would mean visits to "Shady Rest" before I'm ready.

Also he doesn't want to go to Paris because he was "there during the war," I'm going to take a pass! If we didn't both experience the Jackson 5 during middle school, I'm passing also.

 

[Ramya]

I have have a question? How old is too old for most ladies? Is 10 years older (or less) too much.....

16 years+ is too old for me.

 

[ThickHair]

Thick Hair- Just exploring this. You're an old man's trophy, what is his reciprocal value to you? You're not comfortable yet mixing with all levels of his friends and neither with yours...if you were to marry someone in the same age bracket what's going to be the impact to social relationships. He's fine at 61 but in about 6 years he will probably be collecting SS and the rapid acceleration of health problems. He's investing in his SOCIAL security-at least that's what my father did. By the way, I was born when my father was 65.

By the way, we had a close friend that married a young lady 5 years older than his daughter. We think she's the fool because she brought everything to the table. He had children and many, many prior relationships and debt. He's smart and ambitious but they had to work their way his backlog of debt and past spending habits. I personally think she was rob of experiencing growth with someone closer to her age.

I have been married before, so I am fine being his trophy. I am not trying to marry him, nor have children by anyone. He is old and set in his ways and never would I try to change him. What he gives me a worldly perspective on things. He is also has a degree in English writing and he has helped me tremendously while I completed my master's degree. I am not afraid to ask him questions occassionally on things that I don't understand or how things use to be. Plus he doesn't want to meet my friend anyway. We are not on the serious romantic level.

You are looking to deep into things that are not to be. Him receiving SS or getting sick (WTH). We are all a day away from getting sick so that is no biggie. My grandmother just knew she would outlive my grandfather because he was old and frail. HA, he fooled her.

I find the only people who have serious issues about him and I are NOT him and I, so it really doesn't matter. I like being with him, he is witty, very chivralous and an all around nice guy. I will tell you this. I would not have dated him if I was a young woman when he was a young man. I have seen pictures and documents, he was a wild one.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

Let's not forget medical history also....they're more likely to have high BP medication, diabetes medication, have seen everything and done it all therefore nothing is new.

I know this a thread for women who like older men...and I'm deeply prejudiced. My father was much older than my mom....no thanks.

I guess you have a point. But I I never thought about health conditions because I guess if you love someone and they have diabetes, you don't stop. erplexed

 

[Belle Du Jour]

Exactly. What kind of man in his 40's is falling to pieces like that?

I don't want him!

I really like older men though. Their baggage, not so much.

Oh, and I am not mad at you for crushing on Capt. Von Trapp!

LOL, I'm like 11 or 12 years old thinking he is FIONE! He had a nice house, dressed well, helped his family escape to the Alps to safety.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

I am casually seeing a 61 yo, I am 38, just 2 years older than his daughter. We have fun together and take it for what it is. We are on different levels and we know that we could never be a serious couple, so we enjoy the dates to the opera, shows and dinners. It is what it is. I get very nice presents and he just wants a little taste, literally every now and again. I don't have a problem with it because, believe me I won't end up pregenat because it doesn't work like that and he was straight forward with that information.

His head is big with his friends (or they see him as foolish) because he got a hot, smart honey on his arm. I will tell you that his friends did try to test me to see if I was an airhead or not and I held my own with everything they threw at me. I will say, I only go around his friends who have girlfriend, never around his friends with wives. I understand it and it doesn't bother because I have never and will never introduce him to my friends. They already clown me about seeing him. Asking me when am I going to Shady Pines to get another date. LOL.

But I do see myself marrying a man at least 10-15 years older than me.

I don't know why, but I see myself ending up with someone older too. I know 60 sounds old to some people, but I have to admit to seeing some men in that age range who are so handsome. I know they would have no clue that I'm checking them out LOL.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

I have have a question? How old is too old for most ladies? Is 10 years older (or less) too much.....

For me, anything over 10-15 years is too old for me, I think.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

I'm not taking any chances.....five years older is the max for me. By the way, I don't like younger men either. I would not date a man that was more than 1 year younger.

DH is 18 months older than I. I'm one of those people that age is more than just a number and that it does matter.

Look at this way, we always evaluate mates for potential. We look at the prospect and say, "where will this man be financially, physically, and mentally in the next say.....5-10-15 years. Dating a 61 year old would mean visits to "Shady Rest" before I'm ready.

Also he doesn't want to go to Paris because he was "there during the war," I'm going to take a pass! If we didn't both experience the Jackson 5 during middle school, I'm passing also.

 

[Transformer]

I am not denying that elderly men can be handsome, distinguished-looking, patient, worldly, knowledgeable and financially sound. But there are no roses without thorns and all roses fade. Imagine how sexy those traits would be on someone.....say 40

I think people underestimate the physical aspect of age acceleration. Let's not get into dementia and the average onset of that.

I really don't want someone who knows that the water is deep, I prefer someone that swims along with me in the deep. Now the next time, we're stay our butts out of the deep end.

 

[Ramya]

My grandpa says that he dates young women because two 65 year old people have no business trying to take care of each other. "She tired, I'm tired and we're just looking at each other."

 

[ThickHair]

I don't know why, but I see myself ending up with someone older too. I know 60 sounds old to some people, but I have to admit to seeing some men in that age range who are so handsome. I know they would have no clue that I'm checking them out LOL.

I check them out all the time, especially the ones with a head full of white hair. I like the older men who are comfortable with being, heck, old. I don't want no Ron Isley, wearing a throwback type of negro. I might as well get a younger dude if I want that.

Yes, my old man wears the jackets with the patches on the elbow with his turtleneck and dockers slacks. I love it. He took me shoe shopping on Tuesday. Unbeknownst to me, he said that this young dude was checking me out while I was trying on shoes. I ask who and he said the young dude with locs, I did see the guy once I thought he was looking for his girl. My friend told me that he walked pass me at least 5 times and gave me the eye balls. I said oh really. I ask why didn't you say anything to me, he replied why, you were with me and I was buying shoes, he understood that, I don't mind if he looks, you look good, as long as he didn't touch you. Yes, I love the confidence.

 

[ThickHair]

My grandpa says that he dates young women because two 65 year old people have no business trying to take care of each other. "She tired, I'm tired and we're just looking at each other."

Tell grandpa I said, "You go boy".

 

[Transformer]

I had a white friend that was dating an wealthy elderly guy. He would always buy things for her, but never just give her the cash. Me, I want stock, CDs and property titles. He never gave her good ole cash so that she could get a leg up.

She also said, all she had to do was "give it a FEW toots and it was over."

 

[Transformer]

My grandpa says that he dates young women because two 65 year old people have no business trying to take care of each other. "She tired, I'm tired and we're just looking at each other."

My 80 year old uncle was found dead by his 40 year old girlfriend. Both uncle and dad liked them young!

 

[ThickHair]

I had a white friend that was dating an wealthy elderly guy. He would always buy things for her, but never just give her the cash. Me, I want stock, CDs and property titles. He never gave her good ole cash so that she could get a leg up.

She also said, all she had to do was "give it a FEW toots and it was over."

I don't want his cash. I like presents, I don't need a donor, I like him for his companionship and the presents are just gravy to me.

Women looking for donor's that is a whole nother thread. I believe this thread is about woman who geniunley like dating older guys, not women who try to juice older guys. My guy has money, but he isn't loaded. Some shoes here, dinner once a week and a big outing every month isn't going to break him. He has a daughter and 3 granddaughters, I would rather he gives stocks, cds and such to them. That is not my steelo.

 

[LadyPaniolo]

I had a white friend that was dating an wealthy elderly guy. He would always buy things for her, but never just give her the cash. Me, I want stock, CDs and property titles. He never gave her good ole cash so that she could get a leg up.

She also said, all she had to do was "give it a FEW toots and it was over."

Just make sure to keep Pappy out of the doctor's office! Don't let him come home with a whole jar full of Viagra looking at you like :eyebrows2

 

[Ramya]

I don't want his cash. I like presents, I don't need a donor, I like him for his companionship and the presents are just gravy to me.

Women looking for donor's that is a whole nother thread. I believe this thread is about woman who geniunley like dating older guys, not women who try to juice older guys. My guy has money, but he isn't loaded. Some shoes here, dinner once a week and a big outing every month isn't going to break him. He has a daughter and 3 granddaughters, I would rather he gives stocks, cds and such to them. That is not my steelo.

Yeah I'm genuinely attracted to older men. There are a lot of women who are ashamed of their older men and a lot of men who are ashamed of their younger woman. I want him to be with me because he enjoys my company. And nobody gets my time if I don't enjoy theirs.

 

[caltron]

My dh's grandfather was married to a much younger woman at one point. He lived to be 99 and outlived 4 wives. He had one daughter when he was over 65 years old(dh's aunt). So his aunt, who is in her early 30's, is younger than dh by about 5 years. And dh's father is like 77 years old, so he is older than this half sister by almost 50 years. It's really weird when you think you about it.

I've always preferred guys my own age. When they got older than 15 years older, I was always uncomfortable. There was too much of a "daddy" vibe going on for me. The only time my eyebrows are raised is really when the woman is really, really young, like under 25. Other than that, it's whatever floats your boat.

 

[Transformer]

An arrangement where nobody is expecting marriage or financial benefit probably could be intellectual beneficial. But that would mean we wouldn't have sex. I only have sex for money....DH was short last night but I expect payment when he walks in the door tonight!

Seriously, every time I've tried to have just a friendship with an older guy they get the wrong idea and always try to take it to a different level. I remember in my adult swim class, I gave an older gentlemen extra help and attention and he was inviting me to dinner. He was very firm on the place he wanted to take me--RIPS (Maryland ladies would be familiar). He went on and on until I told him DH would be coming and he too should bring a date! From then on, I decided to let him drown. His skin was thin...you know old man thin. I had to touch him to instruct him properly.

 

[SugarBaby]

Where's the shotgun smiley for EbonyB ?


Now, How am I gonna look at an older man w/o laughing first?


I am ruined.

 

[JFemme]

:gunner7::210:

here ya go.....

 

[TeeWhyAre]

i love older men. for a serious relationship, though, I have been stuck at 35. I am 27 and have been dating men no other than 35 since I turned 18. One man lied and said he was 35 but he was really 38. I don't know why? Maybe because my mom dates younger men and I'd HATE to cross over in her dating pool. She likes thugass losers, though, so, we don't really date in the same circle anyway. Soooo... lemme go sit down some where and think about this.

 

[Theo]

Older men are cool but they always wanna settle down too fast. I have a life I need to live.

Also, they're too much like parents. I remember when I dated this older guy, every time I talked to him about some issue I was going through he would always give this condescending chuckle ("heh heh heh heh") and then proceed to give me advice.

It got boring real fast. I nexted him.

 

[lexi08]

10 years older in my max. I also don't care for dating men younger than me.

 

[MizAvalon]

I have have a question? How old is too old for most ladies? Is 10 years older (or less) too much.....

Right now I am 33. I think I could go as old as a well preserved 50.

 

[Duchesse]

My first "bf" I was 19, and he was 31.

When I was 22, I dated a 38 yr.old with 2 kids and a business. I wasn't ready for the level of intensity that ensued, and was darn near not ready to be a wife which was the plan. I was also only 10 years older than one of the children.

I'm 27 now, and would love to meet a man 33-40ish. I've only dated two guys who were my age, and they were too immature and into playing games, running around.

Now that I'm older, I can better handle older men. In my experience they tend to want to get serious pretty durn quick. A major downside in dating men several years older can be not having that cultural connection, as in growing up in the same decade, and being nostalgic about the same types of things, if that is important to you. For this reason, a 15 year difference is my max., and they must be physically fit and active.

 

[msbettyboop]

I once dated an older guy a couple of years ago and he was handsome, distinguished-looking, patient, worldly, knowledgeable and financially sound like someone on here said but LAWD, the guy had no idea what i was talking about half of the time. The generation gap was phenomenal. He whined every time i wore skinny jeans or showed anything resembling a cleavage, didn't want to go out anywhere, didn't wanna dance, kept on yakking about me having too many shoes or more than one handbag (stuff I bought for myself with my money BTW) and the icing on top, got several cramps every time we got busy. I returned to men closer to my age not long afterwards.