If You Sucked In Bed...

[FeelinIt]

...Would you want your partner to tell you? If not what would you want him to do? Would you let him know if he sucked in bed?

Define "sucked"...

joking

Yes I would want him to tell me. I would def tell him. My getting some is pretty darn important and being shy about saying something ain't gonna mess that up.

 

[Paradox]

I was reading up on Yahoo Answers how a woman can be bad in bed, and there are ALOT of things.
I can't even remember them all. This will be first my time saying this, but being a virgin on honeymoon night is going to SUCK for me.

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

I was reading up on Yahoo Answers how a woman can be bad in bed, and there are ALOT of things.
I can't even remember them all. This will be first my time saying this, but being a virgin on honeymoon night is going to SUCK for me.

No it will NOT. Chances are, the only reason why it will suck is the discomfort. Men love virgins, because they like to feel that they taught you everything and you're unused merchandise. That's why they are pressed to have women with "low" numbers, because she doesn't have a 'lot of mileage.' While I wish I hadn't slept with the person who was my first, I don't REALLY regret losing my virginity because there aren't a lot of male virgins left and if you couldn't wait for me, in the respect of marriage, why should I hold my "virginity" on a pedestal while you were out sowing oats?

Have pride in the fact you waited for the right one, whether or not you're married, and don't stress it. It's when you're deliberately NOT trying to show an interest in improvement that you might find your performance sucks.

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

...and just because a man "enjoys himself" doesn't necessarily mean it was on account of you (general).

The ability to approach a lover and tell them how to improve, and your lover knowing how to pass down "constructive" criticism is a true sign of intimacy. Because it's gone beyond getting one's rocks off, to actually learning to please and be pleased.

That's sexy!

Took the words out of my mouth. I definitely agree! IT doesn't have to be "You need to do this... because you suck." You can say things like:

- "Baby I like it when you.... but I would love it if you would...."
- "Yes, keep it right there -moan-" (when he does something you like)
-"Oooh ease up a little this way and let's .... oh yea that's it"


Stroke the ego and make it sound sexy and appealing.


You don't have to say "Man you too rough, you numbskull~"

 

[DragonPearl]

I was reading up on Yahoo Answers how a woman can be bad in bed, and there are ALOT of things.
I can't even remember them all. This will be first my time saying this, but being a virgin on honeymoon night is going to SUCK for me.

I know too many women who get hung up on pleasing a man, and they don't get their own needs met. If you're a virgin, don't stress yourself thinking you have to be this sex expert for the man to enjoy himself. If a man wanted one, he wouldn't have married you. RELAX. You will get better in time. And you might be a natural, you never know.

Nowadays that sex is so readily available to men without the bonds of marriage, they can be picky and compare and talk about if a woman is good in bed or not. I still remember the days when men were too happy to get "some."

 

[Lylddlebit]

~~~~~~~~~Deleted~~~~~~~~~~

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

There is always just grabbing hold of the steering wheel and taking the captain seat to help the team..then you don't have to say anything, worry about the ego, or wait for the desired experience to gradually be learned.

LMAO!!!!!!! That works too, but sometimes I'm just TOO lazy. Don't ask me what my favorite position is. I'll just say I'm on the couch, he's on the floor thrusting...

 

[NYAmicas]

Shoot, tell me something.

 

[BlkHoneyLuv2U]

I had a male co-worker tell me and some other ladies that men dont really care how good or bad a woman is as long as they get to the place they(the man) is trying to get to. He said the worst p**sy he ever had was good long as he got his.

 

[Esq.2B]

I only suck in bed on his birthday and special occasions...
Huh...what are we talking about?

 

[SelahOco]

I was reading up on Yahoo Answers how a woman can be bad in bed, and there are ALOT of things.
I can't even remember them all. This will be first my time saying this, but being a virgin on honeymoon night is going to SUCK for me.

No...it will be beautiful! If he's your heart's desire, and you his...you will never forget it.

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

I had a male co-worker tell me and some other ladies that men dont really care how good or bad a woman is as long as they get to the place they(the man) is trying to get to. He said the worst p**sy he ever had was good long as he got his.

I can believe that, and for some, I doubt I would care about how I performed for them... but there are some whom I would like to be unforgettable for.

 

[TCatt86]

Please tell me!!! I had an ex that was very willing to teach me and it was so much fun. Women have to realize every man is not the same so you can't use the same tricks and expect it to work the same be willing to learn. Like Chris Rock said, "just becaue I **** doesn't mean you made me ****"

 

[Windsy]

Please tell me!!! I had an ex that was very willing to teach me and it was so much fun. Women have to realize every man is not the same so you can't use the same tricks and expect it to work the same be willing to learn. Like Chris Rock said, "just becaue I **** doesn't mean you made me ****"

I totally agree with this post 100%

 

[Spongie Bloom]

yep definately!!! i wouldnt want him to lie to me an act like its fantastic when its not. of course he should say it tactfully cause if he said it in a mean way it will make me feel insecure and probably wouldnt wanna have sex with him again. I would also let him knw if he wasnt doing it for me, tactfully of course

 

[nelcoy]

I had a male friend said that he had a bad experience bc the woman's walls was gone. (she needed to do some exercises or he was too_____)
Sorry if I was too graphic!

 

[FlawedBeauty]

yup i would surely wanna know. and i have not had any hesitations in tellin a partner that their **** is whhhaackkk

 

[Zaynab]

I only suck in bed on his birthday and special occasions...
Huh...what are we talking about?

Oh you should try it more often hun

 

[itismehmmkay]

Took the words out of my mouth. I definitely agree! IT doesn't have to be "You need to do this... because you suck." You can say things like:

- "Baby I like it when you.... but I would love it if you would...."
- "Yes, keep it right there -moan-" (when he does something you like)
-"Oooh ease up a little this way and let's .... oh yea that's it"


Stroke the ego and make it sound sexy and appealing.


You don't have to say "Man you too rough, you numbskull~"

Exactly.
I'd let them know, but I probably wouldn't voice it like a regular talk.

 

[Peacan Tan]

I think that is the real test for eveyone who claims to have "good good, milkshake" lol and all the tacky catch phrases for being good in bed....if at least one of the 2 has it going on bad sex is impossible. To answer the question I would want to know (even though I think the displayed reaction or the lack thereof should be a good indicator)...

I thought milkshakes were another word for chachas up top.

It seems to me that the way a guy performs is of habit.
You can tell him what you like but they slide right back into that same old mess they were doing before.

 

[eyunka]

On a serious note I just made a hasty decision based off this topic. After it was all said and done I feel relieved. I know not many woman would agree with the decision I made with my husband but maybe now he will get the point of how much i dont enjoy having sex with him.

 

[itismehmmkay]

^^^how'd u tell him

 

[eyunka]

Sex is a chore for me I dont enjoy it at all...I have explained how i wanted to be please...nothing. i have expressed my unattractiveness to him....nothing, my discomfort.

For 11 yrs sex has revolved around if he helps me with the house. If he does not get enough he does nothing. So i just told him as much as this will hurt me go find someone that will make you happy in that area. Because i havnt been for 11 yrs and now wont make a difference.

It hurt his pride. He ask if he was that disgusting that i would tell him to go to someone else. Its not that it has been 11 yr cycles and nothing has worked. Im tried of faking the funk

^^^how'd u tell him

 

[MD_Lady]

On a serious note I just made a hasty decision based off this topic. After it was all said and done I feel relieved. I know not many woman would agree with the decision I made with my husband but maybe now he will get the point of how much i dont enjoy having sex with him.

Hopefully things will work out for the best. Of course it's always good to be mindful of DH's feelings, but you should never feel like you can't be honest about what you do/do not find pleasurable.

 

[eyunka]

I believe this is a slow begining the end

Hopefully things will work out for the best. Of course it's always good to be mindful of DH's feelings, but you should never feel like you can't be honest about what you do/do not find pleasurable.

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

Sex is a chore for me I dont enjoy it at all...I have explained how i wanted to be please...nothing. i have expressed my unattractiveness to him....nothing, my discomfort.

For 11 yrs sex has revolved around if he helps me with the house. If he does not get enough he does nothing. So i just told him as much as this will hurt me go find someone that will make you happy in that area. Because i havnt been for 11 yrs and now wont make a difference.

It hurt his pride. He ask if he was that disgusting that i would tell him to go to someone else. Its not that it has been 11 yr cycles and nothing has worked. Im tried of faking the funk

Wow I'm sorry to hear that.... I empathize with your frustration and hope that while this is rough, you two can work something out

 

[MD_Lady]

Hopefully things will work out for the best. Of course it's always good to be mindful of DH's feelings, but you should never feel like you can't be honest about what you do/do not find pleasurable.

ETA:

Sex is a chore for me I dont enjoy it at all...I have explained how i wanted to be please...nothing. i have expressed my unattractiveness to him....nothing, my discomfort.

For 11 yrs sex has revolved around if he helps me with the house. If he does not get enough he does nothing. So i just told him as much as this will hurt me go find someone that will make you happy in that area. Because i havnt been for 11 yrs and now wont make a difference.

It hurt his pride. He ask if he was that disgusting that i would tell him to go to someone else. Its not that it has been 11 yr cycles and nothing has worked. Im tried of faking the funk

I'm sorry it came down to this (i.e. you reaching your breaking point after feeling neglected for 11 years), but my original opinion still stands. It's a shared experience that both parties should enjoy as an expression of intimacy, not as a reward or punishment. Hopefully, the two of you will be able to work on the underlying issue that is the real cause of what's happening in the bedroom.

 

[eyunka]

ITA with the bolded and I have no idea i to even try to get it back. It says a lot if I can feel relieved after tell my DH to find someone else to help him in the bedroom department. I will admitt, it will hurt if he does make that decision but some how I still feel relieved. There is something terribly wrong with this situation.

ETA:
I'm sorry it came down to this (i.e. you reaching your breaking point after feeling neglected for 11 years), but my original opinion still stands. It's a shared experience that both parties should enjoy as an expression of intimacy, not as a reward or punishment. Hopefully, the two of you will be able to work on the underlying issue that is the real cause of what's happening in the bedroom.