If I cut my Hair, I lose my Man...

BC - will your man stay with you if your hair breaks off over time and you start to go bald because you didn't cut it when you needed to?
Being attractive to your partner is very important, but if he can't understand why you're doing something as simple cutting your hair then I can't see him being understanding in larger issues
 
Im sorry but it seems like he's looking for a way out and he's using this dumb ass excuse.Your hair is pretty much short anyway, so its not like ur making a dramatic turn by cutting WL hair or something ANDDDDD a twa is temporary. If you retain length really well you should be back to the length in your avi within 6 months maybe less. If he were your DH I would say consider other options but he's not so screw him.
 
ladylibra said:
you've only been together for a year and were engaged? :look:

your relationship has bigger problems than hair babe... sorry to say. he says you're a pretty girl and then says you'll look like a boy in the same breath.

come on now.

there's a saying i now live by that applies perfectly to this situation: "Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't." - Erica Jong
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:yep::yep: ITA.
 
A man who loves you should accept you for who you are on the inside. What if you were to have an accident, or need chemotherapy, or even just start to show signs of aging? If there's not something deeper there to hold a man's interest, it's not love. I wish you the best of luck. :hug3:
 
I'm not the type of woman to say "dump him"...but in this case..regardless of you bcing or not..I'd be on the lookout for more fish in the sea..cause he doesn't sound like the one.
 
This is a blessing in disguse. You are having health related issues and he's sweating your relationship over that?? He should be trying to help you. Tend to your hair and yourself as fast as you can, sounds like you have to get a new place also from what you posted.

You have a lot to process right now but the first thing to do is take care of yourself because your relationship is already toast based on what you have posted here.

The man can not love you and tell you he would leave because you are having problems with your hair! How insane is that? You have to be the one with sanity here.
 
beautifulisaunderstatment said:
Girl, if I were you Id get me some Nair and a suitcase. :look: Id be shine-tee bald and out the door!
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She can't do Nair, the chemicals are bothering her scalp...I have the same problem that's why I have only 4 inches of natural hair on my head today. I cut the mess off in Dec '07 after a touch up gone bad in Oct. '07 and I haven't looked back since. I hope OPP can do the same, its so freeing, my hair is healthy and my scalp is happy!!

Get some clippers or sissors do the shine-tee and then be out the door.
 
I came into this thread thinking the title was an exaggeration or metaphor. It saddens me that it isn't.

Anyway, I agree with pretty much everyone else in this thread. SMH
 
While he may not like it, trust there is another guy who will love it. You have to do what makes you happy. I am sure he wouldn't be so willing to let's say, grow dreds for you if you demanded it. Yeah he is not seeing the big picture and sounds really shallow. You know what you need to do. Cut your hair and cut him loose. Looking forward to seeing those fly twa pics!!! Q
 
Im glad everyone gave good honest answers....

I was wondering how important a womans image (her size, hair ect.) should matter to their SO, like if you can expect him to really want you to keep your hair natural, or relaxed, or a certain length or without weave.....And i think you can probally count on that just as some people woul probally not want their husband/SO growing a big afro or instantly cutting to bald head ect. ect.

But i think you still should do what you want, and even though he may not "want" you to do it, he shouldnt want to leave you over something like that :nono: I think thats pathetic of him. IMO you only do that when you dont truely really love someone or your more into their image/material/outer
 
Ciacia said:
IMHO he is emotionally black-mailing you which is not nice, but he is a man and they are not perfect when it comes to communication. You said you already went through a BC in November so he probably thinks "she already did that once and now she wants it again WTF !!!!"

I think the ladies on this board are really serious (or I should say more than average people) when it comes to hair care, so instead of taking a drastic decision (i.e. breaking up) I suggest that you have a nice and calm conversation about your issue. Show him your hair state, explain to him your fears regarding a new relaxer (short hair is better than bald right :-) ). And most of all tell him the most important thing "baby it may sound crazy, but hair actually grows, it is just a matter of time".

Hope this helps
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You know what, that isnt right what he saying/doing at all...

But i was also wondering if back when you BC'd in the past, was it a big situatuon where you werent happy, were crying ect, then it was a big decision to relax...and now he's wondering why you were doing it again?

Because im thinking if you BC'd in the past, and were really happy about it, but for some reason decided to relax and hated it, he would have no room or wouldnt say anything about you being pretty but looking like a boy when you cut your hair because he knew you had no problem with it....

I also think that if the relationship is worth saving, you guys should talk about natural hair, how the transiton starts as far as BC'ing, and why you want to do it.--He may be one of the people who just dont understand what your doing, and maybe doenst even like/get why someone would want to be natural.
 
Ciacia said:
IMHO he is emotionally black-mailing you which is not nice, but he is a man and they are not perfect when it comes to communication. You said you already went through a BC in November so he probably thinks "she already did that once and now she wants it again WTF !!!!"

I think the ladies on this board are really serious (or I should say more than average people) when it comes to hair care, so instead of taking a drastic decision (i.e. breaking up) I suggest that you have a nice and calm conversation about your issue. Show him your hair state, explain to him your fears regarding a new relaxer (short hair is better than bald right :-) ). And most of all tell him the most important thing "baby it may sound crazy, but hair actually grows, it is just a matter of time".

Hope this helps
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IMO, breaking up is going to be the next step. A couple of posters have already said that it isn't about the hair and I agree. He is taking this relationship backwards, unraveling it, one step at a time, i.e. broken engagement, asking her to move out.

OP do whatever you want with your hair, this guy is not the one for you.
 
This is deeper than hair. You were engaged. Now you're not, so there other issues that need to be addressed.

But to strictly answer the question, anyone that shallow is not worth keeping.
Be glad he's showing you who he is now and not later.
 
Shinka said:
how do you feel about the relationship?

it's on its last dying leg
how important is the relationship to you?
was very important, but I'm moving out per his request. So I don't know really. I know I love him
how important is the health of your scalp and hair to you? very important, I can't do these perms anymore. I feel I look horrible. More horrible thanI would bald headed.

I just feel emotionally sad over this.
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He's putting you out of the house?
that would be the cause for break up not whether or not my hair is cut.
 
you should read Nappily ever after. similar scenario.

if he really loves you. he would respect your choices. ending a relationship over hair is really low.

you should do what makes you happy. he should really be in love with your inner beauty . hair or no hair
 
If he leaves you for something as shallow as cutting your hair then you may be better off without him... you physical appearance is not gauranteed to stay the same,(that goes for his too)... You are still the same person whether your hair is long or short.

Hope you find some clarity... I know this decision is tugging at your heart.
 
He'll break up with you over a hairstyle? WTF??? He is hella shallow if he breaks up with you over short hair. To me hair is a fashion statement. Your hair style just adds to your steez, hair dosen't make you who you are. For him to even suggest that he would break up with you for your fashion choice is ridiculous! You are too cute for that nonsense. I think if you want short hair you should rock short hair. You have a cute face and nice cheek bones short hair looks good on you. I would cut my hair just to spite him. You guys should be together or not together because of love and nothing else.
 
Girl my DH says that alllllllllllll the time!!!

Its all just BS.

If he will leave you for that then seriously, you dont need him. Thats so superficial

Whats next? If you have his baby and get a stretch mark across your stomach he'll leave you?

Men make me sick with this type of ****.
 
cocosweet said:
This is deeper than hair. You were engaged. Now you're not, so there other issues that need to be addressed.

But to strictly answer the question, anyone that shallow is not worth keeping.
Be glad he's showing you who he is now and not later.
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I so agree...
 
Shinka said:
I have a dilemma today. I want to BC cause I can't do these perms. I had a bad scalp reaction last touch up and its almost time for anothetr touchup. My hair is short so there's no hiding the hair or protective ponytails. It's getting puffy in the miami heat.

I have a dilemma, I want to cut it and my man said if I do...it's over. He lasted through another BC this past Novemeber and says he can't do another.

"Makes no sense for a pretty girl like you to look like a boy"

We've been together for a year, we just ended our engagement, but decided to take things slower.

I don't know what to do. I don't like this puffy permed mess. He doesn't even like braids or weaves. I'm at a crossroads.

My Man or My Hair...help please.
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He must not be that committed to you if he's going to bounce over some hair! I know I did a BC a year ago, and my DH was surprised, but he just took it in stride. I had to do what I knew was good for my hair. And, now just 10 months later, I have a healthy head of shoulder length hair.

Girl, I know you love him, but love yourself more ~ always!
 
my opinion will probably be very unpopular so I wont say much.

If hair was one of the reasons he ws attracted to you in the first place; I can understand why he is upset.

I personally wouldnt leave but you must also consider what he is feeling.
He might think that the fact the he will not be attracted to you isnt that big of a deal and that his opinion doesnt count.

many women do the same thing; but not with looks but money and dont hesitate the leave their mate if/when he goes broke.

I think ill stop here.
 
Re: NO!

Eiano said:
Pshh!!

Are you crazy?

Stay with him!!! Don't cut your hair. Keep it how it is!!! So what if it's damaged, at least no one call ever call you "no-man-having heifer"!!

now how do you feel about that response?:sekret:
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AHHAHAAAA


Thats Funny

Thanks for laugh I needed that
 
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