I hate the "Rules" of dating

[Xavier]

So I met this guy who I thought was interesting.

We hung out at a lounge this past weekend. Of course I'm thinking, if he enjoyed the time we spent together he'll be the one to pick up the phone and call me. On day #4 he texted me asking how I was doing, late that evening. I don't want to seem to eager, so I wait until the next afternoon to reply to his text. He waits until 11pm that night to ask why I took so long to text him back.erplexed We went back and forth for a minute and then I caught him in a lie(didn't call him out on it). I have decided not to waste anymore of my time on this one.


I am so tried of all these "rules of dating". I know that they work in most cases, but I get so frustrated sometimes.

I don't date much because I really hate it. But I told myself I need to be more visible in 2009 if I am going to be serious about entering a relationship.*sigh*

Anyway, that's the end of my rant.

 

[~~HoneyComb~~]

Make your own rules and if a man doesn't abide by them, give him the boot!

 

[username12]

So I met this guy who I thought was interesting.

We hung out at a lounge this past weekend. Of course I'm thinking, if he enjoyed the time we spent together he'll be the one to pick up the phone and call me. On day #4 he texted me asking how I was doing, late that evening. I don't want to seem to eager, so I wait until the next afternoon to reply to his text. He waits until 11pm that night to ask why I took so long to text him back.erplexed We went back and forth for a minute and then I caught him in a lie(didn't call him out on it). I have decided not to waste anymore of my time on this one.


I am so tried of all these "rules of dating". I know that they work in most cases, but I get so frustrated sometimes.

I don't date much because I really hate it. But I told myself I need to be more visible in 2009 if I am going to be serious about entering a relationship.*sigh*

Anyway, that's the end of my rant.

Why hate the rules?

It's just saving you from being strung along and heartbroken. Thankfully he showed his a** and saved you some time. Clearly he's about just getting some. He waits 4 days, and responds with a text during booty call hours? Aw hell naw! You don't deserve to be treated like that. Now you are open to the right guy when he comes along.

 

[Bunny77]

I hate this dating process too.

You did the right thing. Him sending you a text was lazy and he didn't deserve an immediate answer just because he sent a text message. And if he really wanted to talk to you that badly, he would have called.

Good that you're moving on.

 

[Xavier]

Why hate the rules?

I hate the rule because I don't like things to be so calculated. I like to just do what I feel in my heart. And I do understand that might not always be the best.

Girl you gotta wait 3.5 days before this. Naw you gotta only text him with minor details. Sweetie you can't pick up on the first ring...it just sounds a bit silly to me but I know it works to a certain extent.

I guess I wish I could just fast forward past all the games. But you are right it does weed away a lot of the jerks.

 

[~~HoneyComb~~]

I hate the rule because I don't like things to be so calculated. I like to just do what I feel in my heart. And I do understand that might not always be the best.

Girl you gotta wait 3.5 days before this. Naw you gotta only text him with minor details. Sweetie you can't pick up on the first ring...it just sounds a bit silly to me but I know it works to a certain extent.

I guess I wish I could just fast forward past all the games. But you are right it does weed away a lot of the jerks.

You can "bend" those rules to make them work in your favor

And like Bunny77 mentioned, kudos to you for not wasting your time of him and moving on:sweet:

 

[Bunny77]

I hate the rule because I don't like things to be so calculated. I like to just do what I feel in my heart. And I do understand that might not always be the best.

Girl you gotta wait 3.5 days before this. Naw you gotta only text him with minor details. Sweetie you can't pick up on the first ring...it just sounds a bit silly to me but I know it works to a certain extent.

I guess I wish I could just fast forward past all the games. But you are right it does weed away a lot of the jerks.

See, lemme tell ya... all this "I wanna do what I really feel in my heart" stuff gets women in trouble more often than not. You think that you're being "real" and "open," but does a man you really don't know deserve all that?

This is the first or second generation in which women started just going with how they felt instead of making a man work for them, and where has it gotten us? Chillin' on dudes' couches and getting "talked to" late at night by text message. I'll take the old way anyday, thank you!

What did you want to do instead of what you did?

 

[Xavier]

See, lemme tell ya... all this "I wanna do what I really feel in my heart" stuff gets women in trouble more often than not. You think that you're being "real" and "open," but does a man you really don't know deserve all that?

This is the first or second generation in which women started just going with how they felt instead of making a man work for them, and where has it gotten us? Chillin' on dudes' couches and getting "talked to" late at night by text message. I'll take the old way anyday, thank you!

What did you want to do instead of what you did?

No I don't feel like I did anything wrong nor would I change my actions. I just feel like there are just so many things to keep in mind while dating and it gets me frustrated at times.

 

[**SaSSy**]

Don't get all bend out of shape, you did the right thing. I went out a date with a guy I thought was really feeling me, he called me once after to ask me how to get to the bar I took him too! N ain't called or texted me since and that was on Sunday. I'm so moving on by myself!

 

[Bunny77]

No I don't feel like I did anything wrong nor would I change my actions. I just feel like there are just so many things to keep in mind while dating and it gets me frustrated at times.

Gotcha.

What might help is to just think of this simply as making a man work for you. I don't follow "Rules" to the exact detail... heck, I'll answer on a first ring if I want, or I'll accept a date within two days if I want or whatever, but the No. 1 "rule" for me is that a man has to be a gentleman in his actions and court me properly.

So, it's easy to ignore text messages or wait as long as I want to respond to them because most times, those types of text messages fall outside of gentlemanly action and proper courting. Also, if I am talking to a man on the phone at 8:30 p.m. (that I just met and haven't yet gone on a date with), and he asks if I want to meet him somewhere for a drink within an hour, it is very easy for me to decline and tell him that I prefer him to make plans in advance for a date that is not at a bar having drinks.

Suddenly, "Rules" become a WHOLE lot simpler that way!

 

[gn1g]

If it were me I would have called him the next day. He knows you all were "trying to play chess" that's why he waited to text.

Sometimes you just need to go ahead and get things moving; no need to dwell in limbo.

 

[nnmiles]

I hate texting... call me

 

[MissYocairis]

Why hate the rules?

It's just saving you from being strung along and heartbroken. Thankfully he showed his a** and saved you some time. Clearly he's about just getting some. He waits 4 days, and responds with a text during booty call hours? Aw hell naw! You don't deserve to be treated like that. Now you are open to the right guy when he comes along.

AGREED!

What's with all this TEXTING? MEN GET ZERO POINTS FOR TEXTING LADIES!

 

[MissYocairis]

...and you know how you lay down the law about texting? Either refuse to respond via text at all, or only respond once and then go MUTE to show him you are not into that fake conversation over text. He will eventually call to see what's up and you can confirm for him then that you do not utilize texts for interactions in a relationship.

 

[BroadstreetBully]

No I don't feel like I did anything wrong nor would I change my actions. I just feel like there are just so many things to keep in mind while dating and it gets me frustrated at times.

But see, once you meet someone who is generally interested in you they won't feel like rules. He'll call you and go out of his way to see you/spend time with you. The ones I don't like do it--it's about finding one I do like who will do it.

 

[DaDragonPrincess]

Make your own rules and if a man doesn't abide by them, give him the boot!

AMEN AMEN AMEN

 

[aribell]

I don't get why people assume they can text you all the time anyway. I have plenty of friends who have to pay for each individual text, and I just changed my plan to unlimited texts. Before that it was really simple, I just said I can't get texts/I don't really text that much. People accept that.

 

[FeelinIt]

So I met this guy who I thought was interesting.

We hung out at a lounge this past weekend. Of course I'm thinking, if he enjoyed the time we spent together he'll be the one to pick up the phone and call me. On day #4 he texted me asking how I was doing, late that evening. I don't want to seem to eager, so I wait until the next afternoon to reply to his text. He waits until 11pm that night to ask why I took so long to text him back.erplexed We went back and forth for a minute and then I caught him in a lie(didn't call him out on it). I have decided not to waste anymore of my time on this one.


I am so tried of all these "rules of dating". I know that they work in most cases, but I get so frustrated sometimes.

I don't date much because I really hate it. But I told myself I need to be more visible in 2009 if I am going to be serious about entering a relationship.*sigh*

Anyway, that's the end of my rant.

I get tired of dating rules too. I hate that I just can't be me yanno? But it has to be done to weed out the worthless and wastes of time.

 

[Filmatic]

This has been happening to me.

I have met a few men. They were very good looking, seemed nice, funny, etc. I give them my number and they text me. Why?

If I give you my PERSONAL number I don't want a freaking text. I could have gave you my email address. What is with this laziness. I let 2 go. They weren't worth it. Texting me at night or early in the morning is a no go.

The other guy I told not to bother texting, he apologized for 'disappointing me' and called. I'll keep him around for a min.