How do YOU stroke a man's EGO?

[envybeauty]

It seems like a never ending task. Just when I do it, I have to do it again. I'm looking for ideas...new and old as to what you ladies do to stroke his ego.

Is it just always complimenting him?
Making his favorite dish every week?
Make his toes curl every night?

How do you do it repeatedly?

 

[SvelteVelvet]

Touching him everytime you are close to him, it could be running your fingers lightly across the back of his neck or softly tugging on an ear lobe while you're anywhere in close proximity, something like that is subtle enough to do in public too without being offending.

 

[Divine_Order]

Simply just making him feel wanted or needed. Compliments too.

 

[envybeauty]

Simply just making him feel wanted or needed. Compliments too.

Just HOW do you make them feel wanted or needed? I hear men complain that they don't feel wanted by women, but just how is she to make him FEEL that? What ACTION is she to take?

Is complimenting him enough to make him feel wanted? I am really curious. Is it by asking him to do stuff around the house, on a car....

 

[SvelteVelvet]

This reminds me of when Boris Kodjoe was on Tyra and his wife (from Soul Food) was in the audience and Tyra asked him something goofy and he said everytime he walks in the house his wife lets out a 'Woooooo' and fans herself and lets out dramatic kinda of yelp like a groupie as if saying "yay, my man is home and he's fine ass Boris Kodjoe." Those are my words, he just mimiced her and said how it makes him feel special knowing his wife is always looking forward to him walking through the door.

 

[envybeauty]

Touching him everytime you are close to him, it could be running your fingers lightly across the back of his neck or softly tugging on an ear lobe while you're anywhere in close proximity, something like that is subtle enough to do in public too without being offending.

Thanks! !!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[gone_fishing]

My fiance is bodybuilding so the best thing you can say to him write now is "ohhhhhhh look at your biceps"..."they are so big"..."can I touch them".

That keeps him happy all day long.

LOL

Also, he's a "manly" man so sometimes I do play the damsel in distress - not annoyingly so where I need help with ever thing I do and can't get my dainty little hands dirty - but sometimes I'll let him get something for me that might be high up in the cabinets or let him open a jar for me and I'm constantly saying, "Thanks! what would I have done without you!

I'm NEVER one of those kind of women that say I don't need a man. Even if I think it, I NEVER say it because I know how important it is to a man to feel like he has a place and that he is wanted, needed, and adored as if he were Zeus.

Of course only offer that if he's holding up his end of the bargain. Don't reward bad behavior. erplexed

Also, I cater to him quite a bit. If he's had a rough day I'll give him a pedicure (I call it a foot rub because he won't do it if I say pedicure.) but I still break out the pumice stone and some mint foot cream. He loves it.

I'll give him back massages and make whatever he wants to eat (but since he's bodybuilding his choices are pretty bland these days).

I always tell him that's he THE best and that he's the one for me AND I never ever "look" even if I see a fine man walk past....well (if I do look) I'm never ever obvious about it.

 

[SleekandBouncy]

You look for positive, but real things to comment on. Maybe he has great lips, or maybe he always offers to get you a drink or something to eat when you're home, maybe he's a really good video gamer. Just random comments like "you know I love [fill in] about you].

Well all else fails go with non verbal ego stroking, it's easy and you don't have to "work" to do it. Men are like puppies, just touch him. It can be standing next to him while he's using the computer and just rubbing his neck or stroking his arm or um...other places casually as you walk buy. You don't have to use words to stroke a man's ego. They love that stuff, they feel all king of the jungle type, I man, you woman.

 

[envybeauty]

This reminds me of when Boris Kodjoe was on Tyra and his wife (from Soul Food) was in the audience and Tyra asked him something goofy and he said everytime he walks in the house his wife lets out a 'Woooooo' and fans herself and lets out dramatic kinda of yelp like a groupie as if saying "yay, my man is home and he's fine ass Boris Kodjoe." Those are my words, he just mimiced her and said how it makes him feel special knowing his wife is always looking forward to him walking through the door.

I get this...thanks!

 

[SoniT]

This reminds me of when Boris Kodjoe was on Tyra and his wife (from Soul Food) was in the audience and Tyra asked him something goofy and he said everytime he walks in the house his wife lets out a 'Woooooo' and fans herself and lets out dramatic kinda of yelp like a groupie as if saying "yay, my man is home and he's fine ass Boris Kodjoe." Those are my words, he just mimiced her and said how it makes him feel special knowing his wife is always looking forward to him walking through the door.

I'd do that too if Boris was my husband. He is too fine! I stroke my husband's ego by complimenting him, letting him know that I appreciate him. If he's had a rough day, I give him a massage and cater to him.

 

[envybeauty]

My fiance is bodybuilding so the best thing you can say to him write now is "ohhhhhhh look at your biceps"..."they are so big"..."can I touch them".

That keeps him happy all day long.

LOL

Also, he's a "manly" man so sometimes I do play the damsel in distress - not annoyingly so where I need help with ever thing I do and can't get my dainty little hands dirty - but sometimes I'll let him get something for me that might be high up in the cabinets or let him open a jar for me and I'm constantly saying, "Thanks! what would I have done without you!

I'm NEVER one of those kind of women that say I don't need a man. Even if I think it, I NEVER say it because I know how important it is to a man to feel like he has a place and that he is wanted, needed, and adored as if he were Zeus.

Of course only offer that if he's holding up his end of the bargain. Don't reward bad behavior. erplexed

Also, I cater to him quite a bit. If he's had a rough day I'll give him a pedicure (I call it a foot rub because he won't do it if I say pedicure.) but I still break out the pumice stone and some mint foot cream. He loves it.

I'll give him back massages and make whatever he wants to eat (but since he's bodybuilding his choices are pretty bland these days).

I always tell him that's he THE best and that he's the one for me AND I never ever "look" even if I see a fine man walk past....well (if I do look) I'm never ever obvious about it.

Yeah...I get that. Some women won't say it directly but they will say ....oh if they never get married, then they will be ok. To me, that is the equivalent of I don't need a man, ever.

 

[p31woman]

Touching him everytime you are close to him, it could be running your fingers lightly across the back of his neck or softly tugging on an ear lobe while you're anywhere in close proximity, something like that is subtle enough to do in public too without being offending.

I agree! Also complimenting him on something...Wheter it's how smart he is, his strength, his looks, thanking him for what he has done...etc

 

[dlewis]

Touching him everytime you are close to him, it could be running your fingers lightly across the back of his neck or softly tugging on an ear lobe while you're anywhere in close proximity, something like that is subtle enough to do in public too without being offending.

That would not work for me. Dh would have me all up in restrooms, in the backseat and feeling all on me if I did that.

 

[envybeauty]

I'd do that too if Boris was my husband. He is too fine! I stroke my husband's ego by complimenting him, letting him know that I appreciate him. If he's had a rough day, I give him a massage and cater to him.

cater to him ...how? by bringing him things he needs (like a drink, etc.)?

 

[Divine_Order]

Just HOW do you make them feel wanted or needed? I hear men complain that they don't feel wanted by women, but just how is she to make him FEEL that? What ACTION is she to take?

Is complimenting him enough to make him feel wanted? I am really curious. Is it by asking him to do stuff around the house, on a car....

He's had a long day, so I would give him a rub down...maybe cook his favorite meal. Listen to him as he describes how "messed up" his day had been and sympathize..." Oh no they didn't do that to my baby, etc" (hey it works) Tell him how sexy he is, and that you still desire him...and how "he's the only one that can....." And tell him how much you appreciate him.

 

[foxxymami]

Call him cute

Then turn around and call him sexy

Do a zerberd on his belly (the thing cliff used to do to Rudy on Cosby Show)

Stroke his cheek, look him in the eye, and tell him I trust him that I believe in him


**there are others....those are the ones that came to mind right away

 

[CandiceC]

Among other things- I have a .com Web site dedicated to him that I update each week adding to the list something that I love about him. I started it the first week of January and it'll go for a year. I'm trying to think of what else I can do with the site once the year is over. :scratchch

ETA: He really looks forward to checking it each Sunday. He'll ask me about the update if I forget.

 

[envybeauty]

Ladies...Thanks! I love the responses.

PLEEEEEZE keep em coming i am always looking for new ideas.

 

[CurliDiva]

LISTEN - most men love to TALK, so just listen and ask a related question every now and then so he realizes that you were paying attention!

 

[SoniT]

cater to him ...how? by bringing him things he needs (like a drink, etc.)?

Yeah, fixing him a drink, stuff like that.

 

[MissScarlett]

I am a serious independent woman and I'm not big on affection or emotions but I manage to do this and do it well.

I cook dh's favorite meals. I send him little text messages and emails during the day.

I'm always thanking him for little things he does even if its oh thanks for stopping and getting me a diet coke.

I'm VERY smart, I pride myself on being smarter than dhbut I will ask him to 'help' me with things that I know I know the answer to or quite frankly don't need his help with at all.

 

[CurliDiva]

Don't become a WALL FLOWER!

Men like the idea that they "won" you over - show that you are still "that" girl that he was first attracted to. Be respectful, but remind him that he is LUCKY to have you.

 

[Cheleigh]

This is a neat topic. I am the only child, only grandchild, so ego stroking is totally unfamiliar to me (to do to other people). I really have a hard time with this.

This thread prompted me to call him right now "just because." He said "oh, isn't that so nice." LOL

 

[foxxymami]

This is a neat topic. I am the only child, only grandchild, so ego stroking is totally unfamiliar to me (to do to other people). I really have a hard time with this.

This thread prompted me to call him right now "just because." He said "oh, isn't that so nice." LOL

Awwwww so cuuuute!!

 

[Divine_Order]

A man needs to know that you are on his team.

 

[envybeauty]

This is a neat topic. I am the only child, only grandchild, so ego stroking is totally unfamiliar to me (to do to other people). I really have a hard time with this.

This thread prompted me to call him right now "just because." He said "oh, isn't that so nice." LOL

Glad it helped someone...and him too! Yeah!!

 

[envybeauty]

I am a serious independent woman and I'm not big on affection or emotions but I manage to do this and do it well.

I cook dh's favorite meals. I send him little text messages and emails during the day.

I'm always thanking him for little things he does even if its oh thanks for stopping and getting me a diet coke.

I'm VERY smart, I pride myself on being smarter than dhbut I will ask him to 'help' me with things that I know I know the answer to or quite frankly don't need his help with at all.

Does he send you texts/emails back?

Or is it that you send most of them just to show that you are thinking of him and if he doesn't respond, you think nothing of it...

 

[gone_fishing]

Don't become a WALL FLOWER!

Men like the idea that they "won" you over - show that you are still "that" girl that he was first attracted to. Be respectful, but remind him that he is LUCKY to have you.

I understand what you are saying. Don't be a doormat. But I think there's more to it than just being respectful. "Respectful" sounds so...hmm...like treating him with the common dignities you would treat everyone else with. It sounds so watered down and boring. Yes, respect should be there but as your man I think most men want more than just respect. Even if they won't admit it, I think they want touching, attention, catering, gifts (on occasion), thoughtfulness, etc. just like we want at times. If you have a truly "good" man, your relationship (imo) would be good enough that you wouldn't think that showering him with affection/attenion/or whatever his needs are would somehow take away from the fact that you are "that" girl.

Does that make sense?

 

[bLackButtaFly]

When he has a bad idea, and I know it's bad and then it goes wrong I don't do my natural reaction of making fun of him and kinda rubbing it in his face, I just say something really sweet, adn give him a little touch and he's good.

Or I once told an ex that turned into a friend when we were talking about someone new I was dating that "it's really hard to move on to someone after i've had you" Not really true, but I could tell it made him feel super good. (but then he tried to come by, and I had to set him straight)

Or I used to tell my ex that I was using him for his body, he would just laugh, but you should've seent he smile he woudl get on his face (priceless)

 

[cocoberry10]

That would not work for me. Dh would have me all up in restrooms, in the backseat and feeling all on me if I did that.