Do you tell him your magic coloring number?

Do you tell your current man about the number in your past (i.e. coloring)?

  • Yes

    Votes: 24 35.3%

  • No

    Votes: 42 61.8%

  • Other

    Votes: 2 2.9%
  • Total voters
    68
BeautifulFlower

BeautifulFlower

Well-Known Member
Hey ladies,

Just thinking....

Do you tell your man the number of previous 'coloring' partners? If not, why not?

If so, why so?
 
Nope.

There is no need for him to know, nor is there any good reason for him to know.

I don't ask his number, either. :lol:
 
NEVER!!!

There are just some things a man doesn't need to know, this would be one of them. I would provide him copies of negative STD testing if that's his concern, or we could go get tested together.
 
My FH can't take that I kissed another guys while we were just casually dating (not exclusive)
Everytime we get into it, he gets stupidly angry and bring it up.
i can imagine what he would do if he found out I colored with him.
 
Absolutely not, because its none of their business. And no matter what your number is they'll double/triple it because they think you're lying.

But I haven't been asked that question since my early twenties. Most older men don't care.
 
I would give a man a serious side eye for even asking. If he's over 25 years old, he would get the screw face and I'd be wondering what's wrong with him for asking that.

And NO he doesn't need to know the number. He needs to know if I'm disease free, and that can and should be verified. Anything else is in nunya territory.
 
I have. Nothing to hide.

But then again, I have a low number. I mean like I can count on one hand low. So guys hear that and assume I'm not "tainted" or "used" as they say. :rolleyes: Whatever that means
 
LadyPaniolo said:
I would give a man a serious side eye for even asking. If he's over 25 years old, he would get the screw face and I'd be wondering what's wrong with him for asking that.

And NO he doesn't need to know the number. He needs to know if I'm disease free, and that can and should be verified. Anything else is in nunya territory.
Click to expand...

I agree. I also feel like there's an element of immaturity to insisting on knowing. Like a junior high boy oohing and snickering at how many bases his friend got to with a girl.
 
Even if your number is "low", there are several issues that can pop up. By telling him the number, you are basically buying into the concept that he has the right to have the rundown on your past sexual history.

Now, some men will ask to determine if you are likely to have diseases.

Some men will ask to determine if you are a "good girl" or not (watch out for those guys, they have a Madonna/Wh*re complex) and if you deserve good treatment or not due to this factor.

Some men are secretly wanting to know because they can use it against you to pressure you into doing things you may not be comfortable with ("You've done it with X guys but you won't let me ____ your ____???" )

Then you have dudes who will end up asking you everything but what color toenail polish you had on while you were doing it! It's a control issue.
 
guys like to believe that you were just born and developed the day before they met you, your life was acapella, and no one was ravaging your crayon box, ever before...
 
absolutely NOT!!!

also I will not tell the truth with the 'when was the last time you colored' question.....

that's nunyun!!!
 
NOT IN A MILLION YEARS!

Partially because, yes, it is none of his business and partially because if I told him I'd had to first calculate then accept the number myself!

Denial all the way
 
Yea it's easy to never have that discussion when you're just dating but for those who are married, there's never a time when curiosity runs rampant? I'm curious.. I guess I can't see being married for ages and the topic of sex partners never comes up..
 
LadyPaniolo said:
I would give a man a serious side eye for even asking. If he's over 25 years old, he would get the screw face and I'd be wondering what's wrong with him for asking that.

And NO he doesn't need to know the number. He needs to know if I'm disease free, and that can and should be verified. Anything else is in nunya territory.
Click to expand...

You beat me to it. I haven't been asked that type of question since I was in college.

Although few men really want to know their woman's number period, most emotionally mature and healthy men won't bother to ask.

If a man over 25 (shoot, over 21) is asking, hinting, trying to find out... then he has issues and is TRYING to make a judgment about you. Whether the number is low, high, none, in-between, Wilt Chamberlain level, the answer will be used against you and the man who is asking has a warped mentality about women and sex, 99 times out of 100.
 
Heck no, because it is none of his business. We do need to make sure our health is right, but so far as numbers, I don't want to know his and he doesn't need to know mine. I am not a virgin and been married before and I know he isn't a virgin.
 
Last edited:
Heck no! The only reason they want to know is to make sure they've colored more books then you, how you learned any tricks you might know, or to use it against you later.
 
Duff said:
absolutely NOT!!!

also I will not tell the truth with the 'when was the last time you colored' question.....

that's nunyun!!!
Click to expand...

Yes, that's another version of the question... less intrusive, but not by much.

I mean, why do you really need to know that?
 
Wow you guys - I really am a newbie to this because no way did I think that the answer would not only be "no" but "HELL NO" for virtually all of y'all. I mean I would want to know how many partners my mate has had . . . I come from the school of thought that nothing should be off limits in the most intimate of relationships. Now maybe that is me being naive . . . but with folks practically demanding to see dudes' credit report before going on a third date, I thought for sure folks would want to know this. I mean if y'all love each other and are secure in the relationship it shouldn't matter, right? :look:

Go ahead and throw tomatoes at me :lol:
 
What do you do when they do ask and you don't feel comfy sayin?
I mean besides lieing/ not telling. How can I be smooth about it? lol (U ladies have a way with words)
 
dinanicole said:
What do you do when they do ask and you don't feel comfy sayin?
I mean besides lieing/ not telling. How can I be smooth about it? lol (U ladies have a way with words)
Click to expand...

"Sweetie, you know no one else is worth remembering now that I'm with you."

"I want us to be able to just focus on us without bringing anyone else into our relationship."

"I feel like it's better if we both don't think about who the other may or may not have been with. Now it's just about you and me."

"Oh...I didn't realize you were curious about that. I really don't think it's important though. ::segway into another subject::"


I'm sure there are many more ways, depending on how sweet, direct, etc. you want to be. You just have to remember that it's your business that he doesn't have a right to.
 
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