Do you have crossover appeal?

[NYKittin]

I've dated outside my race and I've been with my japanese so for 4 years now. I think crossover appeal is just a vibe that lets men know you're open to dating them. It has nothing to do with the physical (brown skin, light skin, dreads, perm, whatever.) I do think that in general, men of other races prefer a black girl on the slimmer side, simply because being thin is prized so much in the white and asian communities. Whereas, black men are all about thickness.

 

[Porsche19]

I do think that in general, men of other races prefer a black girl on the slimmer side, simply because being thin is prized so much in the white and asian communities. Whereas, black men are all about thickness.

Not true really... as a thicker woman, I find that the majority of men in every race go for thinner girls. Don't get me wrong, MANY men love thick women... I don't have a problem finding a man that loves my body, but being thin is the general standard of beauty for everyone in most cultures.

However, a good percentage of men are turned off by thinner women, it's not as if we thick girls are gettin thinner womens' rejects

 

[Dare~to~Dream]

No, I can't say I really have crossover appeal after reading this thread. At first, I used to think I attracted most races of men because of their staring {some older white men even "flirt" by winking at me}...however, only one person {actually two} of another race asked me for my number and I was not feeling either of them in that way...this was several years ago...and [they] were the "lame" types that you wouldn't want to date and definitely not someone I was attracted to...{at the time I was not too interested in dating outside of my race as I am now}. I have an interest in exploring my "options" and it just really started this year...there was one person I had my eye on {he was in one of my classes} and for awhile we communicated by email {the semester was over and it was summer break} but then it got kind of ugly...so in hindsight I don't think I'm ready to date outside of my race as much as I thought I was...though I'm generally friendly to everyone...I still think location matters...at least from my experience.

 

[DragonPearl]

I think I do. I have been approached by men of all races, which is fine with me cause I loooooove men.

 

[WhipEffectz1]

I definitely have crossover appeal imo. I've dated latino, italian, irish, pacific islander, and persian men. I use to be an equal opportunity employer until I found my present boyfriend who happens to be black.

 

[hotshot]

I thought that I was the only one who got hit on by a hasidic jew... lol

I'm not alone!

That happeneed recently too...

I find that men of all races are attracted to me. Black men will talk to me... but less than other races. I'm not gpoing to say that I "act white" but the especially ingnorant say so. I'm blackity black black... WITHOUT being ghetto. That doesn't mean that I act white.

I've dated white, black, chinese, filipino, jewish, afghani, yemish (IS this what you call a person from yemen??? lol), puerto rican, dominican and indian... possibly more... don't really keep tabs. Hey, I date a lot

I am a complete JEW, RUSSIAN and CHINESE magnet.... lol don't ask me WHY. 70% of the time the men that are interested in me are in one or more of those three groups.

I don't think that men of other races are attracted to me becuase of my muddled features, or medium-light skin. They just as easily are turned on by darker women. I think that it has more to do with personality. They see beautiful black women all the time, but sadly, many times they are ghetto, or unapprachable for some other reason... and black men I think are often intimidated by me. I'm a black woman that *gasp* uses big words. The good black men are usually dating the white/asian girls in my experience.

Just my opinion.

interesting. but a man can't tell your personality while you're just standing by yourself at Astor Place, or commuting to work on the 4 train. personality isn't what makes jayne kennedy, vanessa williams or beyonce nationally regarded beauties and a other women niche-regarded black beauties.

side note: google "black woman" and see the first three pictures "google images" gives you. these narrow representations are unfortunately how we are perceived by alot of people. ghetto, or light with blonde hair.


ps- i think its "yemeni."

 

[MissYocairis]

I think someone mentioned "approachability". That sounds like the most accurate answer from what I can see. I attract different races. Different ages and different "types" (i.e. thug, surfer, nerd). It would have to be approachability. I think most men of different races secretly find BW attractive but are less likely to approach because we may or may not be approachable on TOP of being "different" in their eyes. Sure, there are approachable women of their race but they are the same as them. It's like two obstacles for us. So, if the more approachable/friendly of us probably tend to get approached most.

 

[Chrissy811]

I attract men of different races, for a while it seemed that I could only get dates with non- black men. I too was one of those ones that everyone thought would marry a white man. By the way Mr. Jones is black.

I don't know what the appeal is...I am just me.

 

[imstush]

This may sound really weird, but I've noticed that when I wear my hair wet and wavy, and just let it hang down....I attract men of other races. Mainly white men. But for the most part, when my hair is straight or curly I get black men!

 

[ADB]

I definitely have crossover appeal. I have had some really fine Black, Italian, Hawaiian, Dominican, African, Caucasian, Korean, Mexican and Turkish men try to date me or even just beg to take me to lunch or a movie.

 

[scoobygirl]

Crossover appeal seems to be the only type of appeal I have. If it wasn't for the non-AA brothers I would have been dateless for years. The only AA guys that would try and holler at me where dudes old enough to be my father or guys who had some "self-work" to do. Even when I was out at clubs with a mixed group of friends the brothers would try and talk to my white friend (even asking me to introduce them ) and I would always end up with a different race.

Most of the non-AA guys I've gone out with have been white Amer, but I get approached by alot of SE Asian, some European, a few hispanic, a Australian, only one Jewish guy and one Palestinean (who was really cool, loved hearing about the Middle East from someone who lived there).

There is nothing special or "exotic" about me and most of these guys I dated were when I was at various weights and sizes. And for all but two of the guys, I was the first black girl they had dated. Just out of curousity, I did ask a few of them why me? The only thing they said was that I seemed really nice.

What's kind of strange is that almost none of the guys I've gone out with matched my ideal type. I tend to like dark features on both AA and non-AA men, but most of the non-AA guys I've dated have been very fair. I guess it's an opposites attract thing.

 

[Stylepink]

The only race that I have a problem attracting is the black men. In the past, I've never had a problem getting guys of other races to approach me, but when it come to my own. Nope, no takers. Sad aint it?

Same with me. I'm married now for 14 years, but the only men who would even pay attention to me is white men. It never bothered me though, I was young out just having fun.

 

[Jewell]

I've had crossover appeal since high school. I attract men of different nationalities (including my brothas). They haven't been afraid to approach me, which I am glad for because sometimes it can be a problem like LadyDee said. I have also seen it happen with my girl friends.

 

[DigitalRain]

I get a lot of appreciative stares a lot of races, but hardly ever approached, even by black men. My mom says I keep a look on my face that screams, "I'll kill you if you say something to me." I can't help it most men are so full of sh*t, half of the time I just don't want to be bothered. I know, I need to change.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

For the ladies who say it's approchability (and I agree with that) what is it that makes you approachable? Do you make eye contact? Do you smile? Make small talk? Dress a certain way?

I agree with the poster who said that for many white guys, approaching a black girl is a "double negative" so to speak. Because if they don't have any experience with black women, they may want to step, but not know how.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

I get a lot of appreciative stares a lot of races, but hardly ever approached, even by black men. My mom says I keep a look on my face that screams, "I'll kill you if you say something to me." I can't help it most men are so full of sh*t, half of the time I just don't want to be bothered. I know, I need to change.

Girl, I got the mean mug too! But I'm working on it

 

[sterry]

I have often had Caucasian men address me. Even in high school there were quite a few that I had close friendships with. I didn't find out until my class reunion that they were actually attracted to me as more. My husband of 12 years is Caucasian.
During college I waited tables at a decent restaurant and on several occasions received calls from young Caucasian men that I had waited tables on. Or they would often request my tables several nights a week.
Most men that have approached me even to this day are Caucasian. I never really question why they approached me. As I just see them as any other man.

 

[sylver2]

God I wish I knew what the secret is to having a crossover appeal........I only get hit on by black men and hispanic men. I personally would like to experience dating outside of my race

Look at the other races, make eye contact,smile. A lot of them are very intimidated by blackwomen.
I always get hit on by whites, arabs, east indians especially, iranians( I have had stalkers in the clubs..lol), Italians, I was surprised that a few Asian men looked my way and smiled recently.

 

[cocoberry10]

I have crossover appeal...do you?

Bumping!

 

[honeybadgirl]

when i was single i was like a magnet for other races, white especially though. i didnt really notice until my friends started saying that. we walked in a club and the white men would come running up to me and thats when my gf said you always have the white men running after you!!!
thats when i started to take notice that white men approach me waaaay more than black! and for the most part when black men did, they were older and/or distinguished.

 

[amina kamal]

This question is right up my alley. I have always had men of many different races approach me. My first boyfriend was half armenian and half white, like Kim Kardashian. I don't know what it was but I always have had men of all different races approach me. Some surprised me because they didn't seem like they were into black girls. My ex husband was african american but after we were divorced I have dated an egyptian man, a somalian man (who happened to steal $3,000 from me)and I am currently seeing a straight up white man. I like him alot and he has treated me better than anyone I have ever dated.

I don't know if its looks alone that causes other races to be interested in black women, I think its your appeal. I have a very worldly, earthy style and I am also very open to other cultures, music, food and the like. I have travelled and lived in many countries and I am political, read alot I think this gives you a broader base to have commonground with a wider range of people. I am also very approachable.

 

[cocoberry10]

This question is right up my alley. I have always had men of many different races approach me. My first boyfriend was half armenian and half white, like Kim Kardashian. I don't know what it was but I always have had men of all different races approach me. Some surprised me because they didn't seem like they were into black girls. My ex husband was african american but after we were divorced I have dated an egyptian man, a somalian man (who happened to steal $3,000 from me)and I am currently seeing a straight up white man. I like him alot and he has treated me better than anyone I have ever dated.

I don't know if its looks alone that causes other races to be interested in black women, I think its your appeal. I have a very worldly, earthy style and I am also very open to other cultures, music, food and the like. I have travelled and lived in many countries and I am political, read alot I think this gives you a broader base to have commonground with a wider range of people. I am also very approachable.

I agree with your bolded. Good luck with your current relationship, and sorry about the guy that stole $3000 from you.

 

[caltron]

I agree with Amina. I think it has more to do with being approachable and letting the guys know that you'd be open to dating someone who is not black. It's well known that black women are very reluctant to date outside the race, so I think that scares off many.

 

[PeaceFlow]

Yup, most of the guys who like me are different cultures and a fair amount take me more seriously.

I think its something to do with how I am body language wise and I have a "white accent" which basically means my speech isnt affected. I often catch Black people looking at me when Im speaking like their trying to figure out what Im about.

Sometimes I also get the more freaky, doggy well known Black men coming up to me and when they come closer and talk to me they give me that look trying to figure me out) and then they treat me with so much respect. I dont know what it is but I may be able to bottle it and send it lol

 

[chica_canella]

I think I got it. But it really has to do with a man not thinking he is going to get turned down.

i mean, I've read before that men of different races want certain types of black women, but more than not, if they are willing to date then they want somone whom they are compatible with and if they feel scared to approach you, then most likely you are compatible with them.

 

[Country gal]

I am a very outgoing person. I was always able to strike up conversations with folks of different races. When I was younger and smaller I had a lot of white guys and other races interested in me. I currently have a black boyfriend but if it didn't work out, I would not limit myself anymore.

 

[glamazon386]

I'm one of those people but I never understood why....

 

[Shardonay11]

I too get hit on by men of other races. Black men too, most guys I pay not attention to because I'm happily married. But the white men just don't stop. One asked if he could buy me a $1000 dollars hand bag. He just thought I was a black woman you could buy I guess. Man was he wrong as ever.

 

[PinkPeony]

I think I have cross-over appeal,I would not limit it to a race thing tough.
I attract artistic types,nerds,athleths... the list goes on.
I think it has alot to do with what you put out there,I def. think I'm pretty open-minded about all kinds of lifestyles and personalities.

How countrygal said no one wants to be put down,if a man senses that you are judgemental he is less likely to approach you.

That of course goes also for people in general,if you have a wall built around you people are less likely to approach you.

 

[Leslie_C]

I think it is about being approachable as well. Personality does make a big difference...I know if out by myself and Im happy and smiling I get the sweetest random compliments...but when I have "F Off" written on my face, nobody wants to talk to that! lol Ive always had slight crossover appeal (Ive had friends in the past question why guys check me out in any random situations that dont warrant being checked out and say they dont know what it is about me, but I have a lot of sex appeal lol).
Also, I notice that when guys of other races (especially white), see me out with my fiance (also white), they get this enlightened look on their face like WOW lol. And I find they are so much more friendly towards me after that...pretty funny stuff.