Anyone thinking of throwing in the "NATURAL" towel for 2012?

[NikkiQ]

A few weeks ago, I started to feel a bit natural hair discouraged and entertained the idea of being a heat trained natural. I don't think I could eve go back to the creamy crack, but you never know what the future may bring. I'm gonna make a committment to at least hang in with the natural hair for 5 years before making any drastic decisions. I'm loving my hair right now and hopefully it continues to be that way til the very end

 

[melissa-bee]

No, not at all.

 

[RoundEyedGirl504]

Well I threw in the towel in May and I'm happy with my decision thus far. You got to do what you feel.

 

[Guitarhero]

OP, have you tried twists, dreds or micros? That might give you the versatility you desire, esp. if your hair is prone to dryness.

 

[FoxxyLocs]

Nope, relaxing is just not for me. I'd do dreads again or cut it short before I'd get another relaxer.

Sent from my HTC Evo

 

[Rocky91]

Nah, no way.
got 99 problems but my hurr ain't one.

I'm a big believer in taking a new approach to your natural hair if it's giving you so much trouble. Maybe it's taboo, but I need a little heat in my regimen. Also, try washing your hair a little less often-cut out all the cowashing. Just simplify things.
Also, I can understand feeling limited and frustrated with natural hair if you confine yourself to protective styles 24/7. Wear it out!

 

[MonPetite]

As others have said, "do what works for you".

My hair flourishes either way and I've learned that up to 6" natural hair saves me time in life for things more important to me than my hair.

If I want hair longer than 6" I know that I resent the time I must take out of my life, just for my natural hair.

I'm back to wanting long hair, and long hair for the long haul as the next 5 years in life will require hair that will be predictable and consistent and my natural hair, though beautiful, is anything but those things.

That means when I get to the length I need (currently rocking a TWA) for the short, straight cut I want to be begin the long-grow-out (I haven't been concerned with length the last two years and cut as I pleased for style) I'll be relaxing.

Ten years from now I may chop off three feet of relaxed hair without a thought because it no longer fits my life.

Different points in life, different personalities, and different hair types call for not all different things...but different things at different TIMES.

It's about you and YOUR mane.

 

[sunnysmyler]

I've had a lot of issues; splits, ssks...the usual. A year into my transition I did not know how to airdry. I would end up with shrunken dry hair that hurt to comb but I just tried again the next week. I think I ended up asking southernbella how she air dried and from there I discovered aloe Vera and glycerine.
This year I considered blowdrying my hair due to ssks but I couldn't even bring myself to do that! I am natural for life .

Austro-Afrikana, please share the "Air Dry Tip" you received from Southernbella. Thanks

 

[Austro-Afrikana]

sunnysmyler It turns out it wasn't southernbella it was soleil185 oops lol. They have similarly beautiful hair It was quite long but the jist of it was:

"I think that detangling, sealing, and stretching are key to airdrying well. When I get out of the shower, I usually wrap my hair in a turban/towel while I get dried off and dressed. That way it will be damp enough to work with, but not so drippy. I keep it in the braids I washed or conditioned in. When I'm ready, I will unbraid one braid at a time, and add my products. I like to use a creamy moisturizer and then seal it with an oil."

She got me using Castor oil and researching glycrine/aloe vera juice so now, 2 years later, I air dry in 6 fully detangled twists using aloe vera juice and glycerine as a moisture spritz and sealing with Hairveda cocasta oil.

 

[sunnysmyler]

@sunnysmyler It turns out it wasn't southernbella it was soleil185 oops lol. They have similarly beautiful hair It was quite long but the jist of it was:

"I think that detangling, sealing, and stretching are key to airdrying well. When I get out of the shower, I usually wrap my hair in a turban/towel while I get dried off and dressed. That way it will be damp enough to work with, but not so drippy. I keep it in the braids I washed or conditioned in. When I'm ready, I will unbraid one braid at a time, and add my products. I like to use a creamy moisturizer and then seal it with an oil."

She got me using Castor oil and researching glycrine/aloe vera juice so now, 2 years later, I air dry in 6 fully detangled twists using aloe vera juice and glycerine as a moisture spritz and sealing with Hairveda cocasta oil.

Thanks Austro-Afrikana, too much Aloe Juice makes my hair crunchy, but I'll try using a small amount with the glycerine and my JBCO and Sunflower Oil and see how it turns out.

 

[smitmarv]

I'm not going to lie, I really been thinking about it lately!

 

[Spongebob]

life with relaxed hair is so wonderful.

(from an ex-relaxer)

 

[DDTexlaxed]

I am strongly thinking about it. I had been using high heat the past few months and my hair just at it. I prefer strait hair. Roller sets and pressing didn't do anything for my hair. Right now, I am very discouraged. Maybe I'll change my view in a few months. My hair fared better lightly texlaxed.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

I shaved my head on NYE so I have been natural for 10.5 months and i have come to the conclusion that I am going to be a straightened natural. I have decided to heat train but and i have flat ironed/blow dried twice in the last 4 weeks but my main goal is just to get rollersets at the Dominican salon every 2 weeks. The SSKs are what did me in for good. I cant deal and for some reason i dont remember having this many back when i was 17.

I would love be do this. I just have no idea how to do it.

 

[Cocoeuro]

I'm not going to lie, I really been thinking about it lately!

MJ looks gorgeous in your signature

 

[LovelyNaps26]

If anything I may adopt longhairdontcare2011's reggie once i hit waistlength. even sera2544 has been using heat more often b/c she says it's just easier at her length. at almost MBL the hair is getting a bit much and i now realize why people adopt that kind of reggie. it wouldn't be show off length or with the intention of heat training but to decrease knotting and tangles throughout the week. I know i can go a month w/o washing b/c i've done it with mini twists but i think washing every 2 weeks is necessary is ideal but i wouldn't blow dry twice a month though. blowdrying once a month or 12 times for the year doesn't really sound that crazy when there are some white girls who do it every morning. anyway i'll see how i feel next summer when i might FINALLY have waist length hair

 

[PinkGirlFluff]

Nah. I love big hair too much. There's just something about big fluffy hair that I think is so sexy. Now for some others I think they should throw in the towel. If you are walking around with your face frowned up because you are constantly hating on your natural hair, please go relax it. Life is too short to be frowned up on the regular over hair.

 

[Seeking8Rights]

Sigh, I've been thinking about it only because I'm tired of doing the wash n'go look. It takes too long for me to twist my own hair (it took 4 hours the last time) and I'm starting to feel like there isn't much to my natural hair. Today, I got a horrible blow out (which I had to reblow out and fix when I got home), so I'm on the verge of just giving up.

Maybe I'll have a change of heart by the end of the year.

 

[toinette]

I would love be do this. I just have no idea how to do it.

Everyone tells me that its long enough to get it set on rollers but I feel like if I'm shelling out money, i want that POW effect and my hair length just isnt there right now. So last month i decided that i would start on my heat training regimen. I dont need it to look perfect cause I'm either under wigs or wearing hats when I'm out of the house. like Rocky91 said, i dont co-wash every day or every other day like i used to. Straightening my hair is a good deterrent to that cause i dont want to throw away all the "hard work" i did in blowdrying/flat-ironing. So for now, my schedule is to DC overnight and then blow dry/flat iron every two weeks. I moisturize every night and oil my scalp with my mix of MTG/MegaTek/Castor Oil every other night.

 

[southerncitygirl]

I'm tagging tiffers for you ,op. she has mentioned in several threads that she had chronically dry hair till she started using qhemet biologics & marie dean products. you still haven't told us your reggie. i wish you would give it a little more time before you relax. natural hair has a crazy learning curve, so much time has passed and i still am tweaking my reggie to get even more rentention. i grew out of a short bob so i had the most fun with my hair once i got past sl and nearer to apl because of the shrinkage. IDareT'sHair,empressri & Nonie come on up in here too and help Smiley79 out

 

[Smiley79]

I have to agree, one thing I love about being natural is how full my hair is. I never had that when I was relaxed (true I didnt work long enough at it, but still). I would miss the thickness of being a natural.

Update: I have not made any drastic decisions to relax or given it any thought since I posted this thread. Just been enjoying the feedbacks and taking it one day at a time. I must add that last night a light bulb lit up in my head that I have EXTREME shrinkage with my hair. DUHHHH! My "3 inches" that I originally posted is more like 3 1/2inche but it looks like one inch and measures at an inch when dry...yes, I got a ruler and measured it,lol But what i hate is that once my hair gets air dried it looks and feels like a matted clump of dry kinks rather than hair. It shrinks so tight and dry. THIS IS WHAT I HATE ABOUT MY NATURAL HAIR!_ok, I'm done ranting and venting.

 

[Rina88]

The times I think about throwing in the towel is when I see other naturals with their hair out. I'm frustrated with my front and back being a strange kinky straight texture while the crown is clearly 4a. I know I'll never be able to do any semblance of a wash and go, and certain styles like twist/twistouts look crazy because most of my head looks as if I have had underprocessed relaxers (twists unravel- twistouts are tricky unless I huge a lot of gel/pomade) . Feeling like I wasted all of my time is disheartening. I've decided I'd wait until my hair is at a healthy WL then I'll texturize. I have texturized ends so I know that it helps with making my hair look more uniform if my timing is perfect. Basically yes I've already decided I would "throw in the towel" and my plan is to wait it out until D-day (WL) and see how I feel then.

I don't see a relaxer helping a problem with dryness, so I suggest you tackle w/e problems you're facing now so if you do decide to relax it will be easier. Remember a relaxer is a chemical process and those are notorious for causing dryness because of the innate damage that occurs. Just my two cents. Good luck OP.

 

[Carrie A]

I am strongly thinking about it. I had been using high heat the past few months and my hair just at it. I prefer strait hair. Roller sets and pressing didn't do anything for my hair. Right now, I am very discouraged. Maybe I'll change my view in a few months. My hair fared better lightly texlaxed.

erplexed sigh

 

[Smiley79]

I been away from the computer for a bit...I just want to clear someting up. I was just sharing a conversation that me and my friends were having. I have not resolved to relax my hair at all; it is something I had considered in the event that I couldnt handle or did not enjoy being natural.But I have not final decision made regarding. I was mostly venting at the time that I wrote the post and probably gave the impression that the relaxer kit was in my hands, mixed an ready to slather, Lol. Sorry for the mixup.

My Reggie: Nothing fancy or rigid
Cowashes: everyother day with Herbal Essence HH or Augbrey Org WC; cold water rinse
Deep Conditioner: DIY recipes, Mayo, egg, olive oil, EO or Aubrey Organic (1 x week)
Leave ins: tried Giov Direct, Kinky kurly, Alove Vera juice with oils, plain water, plain oil, water with glycerin; unfortunately nothing works more than a few hours.
Oils for sealing and daily use: olive, sweet almond, shea butter, castor

I am not using all of these at once...im listing them for you to have an idea what I have tried. I've given different things a chance so I can find the right reggie for me. Products are great however the results last nothing more than a couple of hours. My desire is manageable hair...Im not being unrealistic and expecting 3c hair, but I would like hair that is manageable. I may need to just come up with the money and go to a professional salon that specializes Natural Hair care down here in Miami. I cant waste anymore time racking my brain over some hair. I want to start enjoying my natural hair already!

 

[Rina88]

Your hair may not be silky but it should be soft it shouldn't feel hard and crunchy, if it does try whole head baggying or a few overnight DC's. There's several recent threads about dry natural hair floating around here. It could be you're not accustomed to the texture of your hair and mistake your hair when it's dry as being dry and thirsty. That happened to me as well early on. IDK I'm just throwing around some ideas.

 

[Smiley79]

The times I think about throwing in the towel is when I see other naturals with their hair out. I'm frustrated with my front and back being a strange kinky straight texture while the crown is clearly 4a. I know I'll never be able to do any semblance of a wash and go, and certain styles like twist/twistouts look crazy because most of my head looks as if I have had underprocessed relaxers (twists unravel- twistouts are tricky unless I huge a lot of gel/pomade) . Feeling like I wasted all of my time is disheartening. I've decided I'd wait until my hair is at a healthy WL then I'll texturize. I have texturized ends so I know that it helps with making my hair look more uniform if my timing is perfect. Basically yes I've already decided I would "throw in the towel" and my plan is to wait it out until D-day (WL) and see how I feel then.

I don't see a relaxer helping a problem with dryness, so I suggest you tackle w/e problems you're facing now so if you do decide to relax it will be easier. Remember a relaxer is a chemical process and those are notorious for causing dryness because of the innate damage that occurs. Just my two cents. Good luck OP.

Mine is the same...It's like I have a weird mullet...4A top, and a 4Z back

 

[Smiley79]

I know I sound like a repeat maching but I want to say another BIG THANK YOU to all of you who commented back to me words of encouragement or advice. I lost track clicking the "thank you" button and want to just say an overall thank you to you all. I luv my LHCF fam...I dont care what they say about y'all. lol

 

[southerncitygirl]

Smiley79

do you have a shower filter? i don't see that you clarify your hair either based on your reggie. any conditioner that has cones could be leaving deposits on your hair and not allowing moisture to get in. unfiltered water can do the same which is why i suggested a shower filter. you may also have porosity issues. some people love roux porosity control. maybe darlingdiva can explain more about how she uses it on her hair and how often. you seem frustrated we know relaxing is not official for you but if you don't get the dryness under control things could be much worse for you once you become chemically treated.

 

[LongCurlz]

I threw my towel in earlier in the year....I miss my beautiful 4a hair though
I got frustrated with the knots and tangles I might change my mind and transition again possibly

 

[Smiley79]

Just out of curiosity, those of you who share my natural hair frustrations, are your 4Cs? Coarse, tight, kinky textures? No offense, but I wonder if those who are cruising down natural street, are you dealing with a texture hair that is not quite as challenging to manage, a softer texture perhaps? For sure, not all natural hair is difficult to deal with, just like not all relaxed hair is easy to deal with. But Im just curious amongst you all who replied, how many of you are in my boat, being a very coarse tightly curled girl.