All Sus Wanted Was $20. Was He Wrong?

mrselle said:
Yep, all of that for $20. She's asked three different men for it and still doesn't have it. Her approach is wrong and she seems to have a few other issues.
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If you’ve got to beg your man for $20 it’s time to get a new man period. $20 is nothing between friends so it should be even less between someone who you are in a relationship with.

She needs to re-evaluate the men she is entering relationships with. But I will give her her due -she isn’t afraid to dump the losers she keeps finding herself with.

ETA. If you’ve got to resort to “asking the right way” for $20 you’d better hope you never need real help. If your purse ever gets stolen and you need to hold $100 until everything gets sorted out you’d be out of luck.
 
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nysister said:
She can't even spell. $20 is the least of her problems. She herself is a poor life choice, let along those she makes.
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It sounds to me like he does not like her, or respect her life choices and is using her for sex. Why would he mention only giving money to a wife? That tells me he sees no future with her AT ALL, else by his standards, would he not want to give money to a potential wife to help her sort out her business and make life easier for her, because well, he loves her and cares for her?
 
Sosa said:
$20 though? Alladat talk for 20 bucks. o_O
If none of the three men in her or her kids lives can give her $20, her picker is waaaay broken.
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This leads me to believe it's more to it than just the $20. He is acting like she asked for $200.00. But clearly if he don't have $20, he shouldn't be dating her! And I hope she didn't sleep with him. If she did, she is losing on so many levels.
 
giigii613 said:
I don’t have kids but is it typical for them to wait until the day of to ask about going on a trip? While I think the guy should give her the $20 telling the kids they can’t go would be a nice learning opportunity to teach them to prioritze and prepare for the things you want in life. Even if I could get the $20 I don’t think I would let my kids go on the trip. If they would have come to her sooner she could have told them to ask their fathers so they could get the money which would have given everyone a chance to get the money up. I would tell the kids they can’t go cause they should have told me about the trip when they found out about it if they really wanted to go. Lesson: don’t wait to the last minute to do things. I would also drop the clown who couldn’t give me the $20 and do better about picking my next man.
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Those are all valid points and I agree with all of it. I have kids but they have special needs so they wouldn't be able to tell me about a school trip. But I do know that I get irritated with my oldest son's school/teachers because they do send notices about school events home at the last minute and for that reason alone, I don't send money in or make plans for us to go to those types of events. We have a very busy calendar with all of his therapies and appointments as well, (plus all of his brother's appointments now) so I have zero-tolerance for accommodating last-minute requests, unless it is an emergency.

I do recall being in first grade and I was cast in the school play and needed a costume for it. I didn't tell my mom until a day or two before. She sewed me a costume so I could be in the play, though. I don't know why I didn't tell her right away.
 
Y'all are looking at this through financially stable glasses. I suspect everyone in this situation is living paycheck to paycheck and $20 is a lot of money to a broke person at the last minute. Ol' dude probably has $46 in his bank account and that has to float him until the next payday. Instead of admitting that he's broke and doesn't have it like that, he found another way to turn down the request and make her feel bad for asking. It's what these broke dudes do. Most guys would jump at the opportunity to be a hero for just $20. This guy is probably riding on E until Friday.

I bet the fathers have a bunch of other kids they are supporting so $20 feels like $200 to them. This is the norm outside of our financially comfortable realities.
 
mrselle said:
Its all in the delivery. This isn't the kind of conversation to have over text. A warm smile, sweet voice and rub on the arm and back does wonders. Throw in a look of anguish for good measure. If he can still say no after that, then she doesn't need to date him and she needs to do a better job of managing her finances and picking more suitable partners.

She sounds like a mess. Three kids, two daddies and nobody has $20? Smh.
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I ain't rubbing a single thing for $20!

The entire situation is just a mess. A mess that she has three (3) men somewhere in her life and she can't come up with a twenty. A mess that he gave her the 3rd degree about $20. A mess that that conversation should have been over after his first reply.

Bless her heart.
 
Crackers Phinn said:
Yep. There was really no point in continuing the relationship past him saying no to $20.
~~~~~~~
I’m sure dude wasn’t sitting back giving lectures on life decisions when he was asking for :moon:

Sex is not free. It was never meant to be free and women being afraid to acknowledge that we sit on gold mines do us all a disservice by being afraid to be called hoes. News flash they calling us all hoes and worse for just breathing.

I have no problem with ole girl asking dude for money. I got a problem with her asking for $20. I know everybody in different situations but still.
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I believe if you want to charge for sex, you need to be up front about it. If you're going to have casual sex, you can't charge on the back end. Seems to me like this was a casual encounter, nothing like any type of relationship. He obviously has nothing invested here, so he felt no need to pony up. I feel bad for this lady, and I would gladly send her $20 for the kids' trip myself. I hope she is more selective about sharing her parts in the future.
 
There is no need for 'emotional foreplay' to ask the man you are dating for $20. I could understand if you were trying to persuade your man to buy the car/house/kitchen you wanted that you may butter him up and put your soft, more feminine voice on; cook his favourite meal; give him that voodoo....but this is $20. He should hand that over no questions asked, no need for a campaign.
 
sissimpson said:
I believe if you want to charge for sex, you need to be up front about it. If you're going to have casual sex, you can't charge on the back end. Seems to me like this was a casual encounter, nothing like any type of relationship. He obviously has nothing invested here, so he felt no need to pony up. I feel bad for this lady, and I would gladly send her $20 for the kids' trip myself. I hope she is more selective about sharing her parts in the future.
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No disagreement, I clarified in a later post that she should have made sure up front he understood that she might need some financial help from time to time. That said there is no rulebook and thereby no rule saying you can't remix and remaster relationship terms on the back end. Dudes stay baiting and switching when they get comfortable so ole girl can too. Some dudes will walk like this one did but most ain't go sweat $20.

BTW - I don't believe there was a kids trip.
 
Crackers Phinn said:
No disagreement, I clarified in a later post that she should have made sure up front he understood that she might need some financial help from time to time. That said there is no rulebook and thereby no rule saying you can't remix and remaster relationship terms on the back end. Dudes stay baiting and switching when they get comfortable so ole girl can too. Some dudes will walk like this one did but most ain't go sweat $20.

BTW - I don't believe there was a kids trip.
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You think she was just testing him? Cause if she is lying that brings another element or concern for this situation.
 
lesedi said:
Men should be embarrassed if they expect the woman they are seeing to pay them back $20. I'm not on LHCFs 'don't date me unless you are a billionaire' crew but this is some foolishness. If you are that stingy, you really don't need to be dating anybody. I spend more than that preparing a nice meal for a dude.

I'm out here wearing yoni eggs, kegeling, eating yogurt and pineapple and taking probiotics and you don't want to help me out with $20? Hehehehe
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#dead @ the bolded... :lachen: :lachen: :lachen:
 
Crackers Phinn said:
I think she just wanted $20 for $20 sake and when he questioned it she went to the obvious go to "I need it for the kids". If it had really been for the kids she would have opened with that.
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I agree. People in this type of situation usually mention the kids first, if it's legit. Usually after someone says no to their request is when they default to a sob story that includes kids or something else equally dire.

This reminds me of a post I saw on Facebook a few years ago. This girl went to a Yo Gotti concert. Apparently, she went even though she knew her baby needed diapers.

Well, she asked the kid's father the next day for money. He said no, then she said she had to buy diapers for the baby. I guess he saw a previous post about her talking about this concert, so he asked her how it was. She replied that it was lit.

He told her she better ask Gotti to get the diapers. :lachen: :lachen: :lachen:
 
shortycocoa said:
I agree. People in this type of situation usually mention the kids first, if it's legit. Usually after someone says no to their request is when they default to a sob story that includes kids or something else equally dire.

This reminds me of a post I saw on Facebook a few years ago. This girl went to a Yo Gotti concert. Apparently, she went even though she knew her baby needed diapers.

Well, she asked the kid's father the next day for money. He said no, then she said she had to buy diapers for the baby. I guess he saw a previous post about her talking about this concert, so he asked her how it was. She replied that it was lit.

He told her she better ask Gotti to get the diapers. :lachen: :lachen: :lachen:
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But that's his kid though SMH
She sounds like a mess too but men will snub their own child to hurt a woman and that is beyond foul to me.
 
:lachen::lachen::lachen:
lesedi said:
Men should be embarrassed if they expect the woman they are seeing to pay them back $20. I'm not on LHCFs 'don't date me unless you are a billionaire' crew but this is some foolishness. If you are that stingy, you really don't need to be dating anybody. I spend more than that preparing a nice meal for a dude.

I'm out here wearing yoni eggs, kegeling, eating yogurt and pineapple and taking probiotics and you don't want to help me out with $20? Hehehehe
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So let me get this straight...all this over $20? The way he kept being passive aggressive towards her calling her “sweetie” made me cringe. The whole situation is sad.

These dusty men won’t give you $20 and expect you to accept a $20 engagement ring:abducted:
 
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