Do you correct you SO/DH when he is wrong?

[NOEChic]

Yes and we just had a discussion about it last night. When he mispronouces a word or uses the phrase incorrectly I will correct him. I tell him you speak in front of people and I don't want you out there looking like you don't know what you are talking about. I only correct him when it is just us, never in front of anyone. He doesn't mind it because I am trying to better him.

He is a better writer than me so, I let him do the writing and I so the speaking.

 

[PeaceFlow]

Listen to your partner.

Also monitor your own tone and wording when you "correct" him.

It's possible that when you correct him you go into a parental/critical tone or use critical phrases without realising. Smirking isn't very nice and is likely to come across badly imo.

 

[hothair]

Yes. I do so does he no biggie plus we have different ways of pronouncing words he Americanises his words (grew up there) I have to remind him the English own the language so my way is the right way

ETA: the approach is key.

 

[Southernbella.]

Early on in our marriage, we both corrected each other for various things. I agree with those who have said there's no real point to it, particularly if you do it like an authority figure.

I think the only time it's valuable is if you see your SO making a fool of themselves in front of others and you pull them aside to save them embarrassment or something.

Sent from my DROID BIONIC using LHCF

 

[crlsweetie912]

I do not. SO uses some "text speak". It drives me up a wall! But he speaks very well. I never correct his texts. And we text a lot due to the nature of his job .

 

[Tolle]

I've got to get better... I can tell that Im starting to wear dh down with all of my nitpicking, nagging, and correcting. At times, I just cant stop myself but end up feeling bad once I see how defeated he looks.

 

[MD_Lady]

I rarely correct anyone's grammar or word choice. If DH is saying something I know is incorrect, I might say "I don't know about that, honey, I'm pretty sure that...". If your SO would rather be wrong than corrected, let him be wrong.

 

[BostonMaria]

Not in front of others and when appropriate. I'm not his mom.

 

[Lucie]

At first, I corrected him more. But SO is from Haiti. Came here in his mid-20's, so a lot of his English is just Kreyol/French processed in his mind. I think it is cute. If he says something wrong when we're out, I'll wait for us to be alone to bring it up. I really don't like correcting people. I don't mind if I am corrected but constructively and allowing me to save face.

 

[Fab_Nikki]

Not in front of others, unless we are playing around. My husband calls me "school teacher" because I am always correcting him. I agree with the poster that said she doesn't want her husband going to work repeating things incorrectly. I am no English major but sometimes Richmond comes out of him. LOL

 

[lux10023]

I've learned to let him talk...keeps the peace

he's really smart and he is quite the success---and I'm smart as well....
which he is fully aware of--in the beginning he said he enjoyed that if he said something wrong i would respond with facts--sorta like a challenge but now i just chill--babes you got it--i make him feel like a king and all is well in our household....

sometimes dh has a way of saying pseudo man mumbo jumbo about women--i correct that instantly---lol..every so often he slips and bumps his head and i remind him what time it is lol

 

[barbiesocialite]

Most times: NO.

It's emasculating. I let them be and let it lie.---MOST of the time.

It's learned behavior from my mother and grandmother who never corrected my father and grandfather when they they were being blatant idiots.

 

[Charlie555]

Most times: NO.

It's emasculating. I let them be and let it lie.---MOST of the time.

It's learned behavior from my mother and grandmother who never corrected my father and grandfather when they they were being blatant idiots.

Eta: barbiesocialite

Maybe that's why I do it, I don't have examples of women who keep quiet. Both my grandmothers divorced and my mom & dad never married. They broke up when I was 4 months old.
I don't have many married family members around me. Most are a few states away.

 

[barbiesocialite]

Eta: barbiesocialite

Maybe that's why I do it, I don't have examples of women who keep quiet. Both my grandmothers divorced and my mom & dad never married. They broke up when I was 4 months old.
I don't have many married family members around me. Most are a few states away.

ahh yes. that likely has something to do with your response.

You've only seen how women behave. Usually it's how women behave around and treat other women. By default, you might not realize you are treating your DH/SO like a woman because that's what you know how to do .....

I'm usually a very assertive, borderline aggressive person, what I've learnedfrom the married women in my family is how to be passive aggressive. It has it's pros and cons. However, avoiding confrontation in my relationship is one of the primary things I've learned works for women when dealing with men. Just let them be right and dont nag them too much. It's acquired tolerance.

 

[FelaShrine]

Im reminded of the Burger episodes SATC

while he was indeed an insecure loser, carrie didnt make it better constantly correcting him in front of her friends, i always cringed during those scenes...its just not something gfs or esp wives do.

people wonder why men tend to leave wives and go after youngins, it's actually not always about the younger body blah blah..it's that the young "naive" ones treat all that he does as if its amazing, omg he's a king, fascinated..while mrs wife is telling jokes at the dinner party on how his jokes arent funny and other ish infront of his face and company.

have an issue, figure out if its that serious and if it is, keep it to btw yourselves. no one wants a husband who would embarrass them, not sure why vice versa isnt considered.

 

[Charlie555]

Im reminded of the Burger episodes SATC

while he was indeed an insecure loser, carrie didnt make it better constantly correcting him in front of her friends, i always cringed during those scenes...its just not something gfs or esp wives do.

people wonder why men tend to leave wives and go after youngins, it's actually not always about the younger body blah blah..it's that the young "naive" ones treat all that he does as if its amazing, omg he's a king, fascinated..while mrs wife is telling jokes at the dinner party on how his jokes arent funny and other ish infront of his face and company.

have an issue, figure out if its that serious and if it is, keep it to btw yourselves. no one wants a husband who would embarrass them, not sure why vice versa isnt considered.

I'm so glad I started this thread, you ladies are giving me a lot to think about. Especially what FelaShrine said above.

 

[GeorginaSparks]

Yes i correct him and he corrects me. Like the word "canoe" i pronounce it the Nigerian way and i just cant get it right. sounds fine to my ears but people dont understand what im saying LOL.

 

[IslandMummy]

Rarely anymore, in the beginning, yes. But *I* don't like being corrected constantly so I stopped. It wasn't adding anything to our daily life. If he asks for the correct spelling or pronunciation or the American way of doing something I'll respond but I'm not going out of my way to harp on him.

He said something wrong in class one day when he first started school and felt completely embarrassed once he realized he was wrong; his major is a male dominated field and men have no qualms about correcting each other under the bro code. After that he takes care to make sure he is correct before speaking in public.

 

[Duchesse]

Taking notes .. I was an English major and I'm currently a teacher and I keep finding myself dating former ESL students lol. I don't think I'm annoying, but I do tend to correct grammatical/vocabulary errors when speaking ( it's hard not to)..not in a judging way I hope :/

Other than that, unless it's something egregious I let a lot of things slide.

 

[Briabiggles]

My SO is an English teacher. No, I don't try to correct him!!

Sent from my iPad mini mini.

 

[Briabiggles]

He seriously corrected my grammar tonight. I laughed and told him about this thread.

Sent from my iPad mini mini.

 

[Farida]

Nobody wants to be corrected all the time Especially for things that don't matter...you will spend so much time arguing over real issues, so why get people upset about things that don't even matter?