20 yr friendship over because no kids allowed

[sj10460]

I understand the context. I used that scenario to make a point that children should be treated somewhat equal. From what I see irl people do the exact things mentioned in this thread. Maybe im missing something here. How can you (not you personally) be close or even related to the other children but favor one child just because its your Godchild.

yes, children are children but they're still people. They have personalities, attitudes and opinions and I don't like every person I meet. Some kids are unpleasant

 

[naturalgyrl5199]

It's not selfish. What is selfish is the "it's my wedding and I'll do what I want" attitude. Yes, it's your wedding and you can do what you want, but how much fun will it be when 1/2 your guests don't show up because they're pissed for one reason or another?

I read this far and skipped the rest.

OP...weddings are about joining families. You have the right to have whomever you want. But remember that unless you are team #justmeandmyboodon'tneedno1else
then you need to understand that the wedding IS about the guests believe it or not.

Yes...the guests ARE doing you a favor by attending and celebrating your union and bringing gifts. How much you decide to spend to entertain them is on you.

That being said...you need to decide. If its all or none then its all or none. My cousin had "no kids" on the invite...but PERSONALLY called me and asked me to bring my 1 year old daughter cause she hadn't met her yet and wanted to see her. Her parents dropped MAJOR CASH on it and were all for it. I noticed a small handful of kids there around 8+ years old...maybe 34 in total. DD was the youngest. No flower girls or ring bearers or bell ringers. She also had an adult cocktail hr and kids were there drinking juices and soda and sitting down or talking to parents...When you have kids IN the wedding...you set the tone for a more family-oriented affair.

By not having kids as part of the wedding, and blatantly putting NO KIDS on the invite she drew her line. She invited the kids she and her FH/DH wanted there and DARED anyone to question it. My DD was the only baby there..is a lap baby and spent the reception sitting in the grandparents, my DH or one of my many adult cousin's lap having fun. She ate from my plate, or nursed and was alright....So you sometimes CANNOT have it all...but need to make a more realistic decision. People will get butt hurt but as the bride...remember its just one day. You have to deal with anyone you hurt (even inadvertently) AFTER the wedding and you still have a LIFE to live.

 

[OhmyKimB]

I think there are 2 kids not coming and 1 that is in it. An invitation was extended to Nanny and the sister but that doesn't mean they have to come. One of them could watch the children. Perhaps they could go have a fun time with Dad, paint pumpkins, go to the science museum...

I do not care for children at weddings. They DO tend to have a ball at the reception -- too much of a ball. They're running all over the place, all over the dance floor, rubbing their fingers on the cake or otherwise trying to be the center of attention. Their parents aren't watching them or if they are, they aren't enjoying the wedding. It's a free-for-all. After seeing kids at my sister's wedding, I opted not to have any at mine. It was VERY expensive per head and just like you would take your kids to Red Lobster but not that exclusive reservations only romantic french joint with you and your boo for Valentine's Day... everything isn't appropriate for children. A wedding is the bride's ULTIMATE VDAY. They do not understand the seriousness of what is taking place or the planning, effort, and expense involved in the occasion. They're just out showing their little arses. Plus, I don't like children anywhere there is free-flowing liquor. It's not appropriate.

Since I agree, I planned to pay for babysitting for any kids in the wedding because after the ceremony they have to go.

 

[LovinLea]

Those kids are probably like Aunty Kinky wants only my sister and not me

I think it is very American to say my wedding the way I want it. I look at it as a family function and what matters more is having a love-filled event that you and your neices and nephews and grandchildren will look at pictures of and not some event according to what you thought was hot in 2014. Maybe I would have done that whole me, me, me thing for my Sweet 16.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

Weddings are expensive. I understand about the no kid rule, but it causes a rift if one child is going and not the others.

 

[Browndilocks]

I still believe the godchild should be included and not the other children. When said godchild was born, if things were done properly, the child by themselves was christened with the godparent taking the vow for them only. That was the understanding between the minister, parents and godparent. The other kids were excluded then, and no promises were made to them on the christening day. Kids know what time it is in situations like that. Why is it all of a sudden a problem now?

If the godparent didn't vow to take care of all the kids they shouldn't be scolded for doing special things for the one they promised to do them for. If the parent wanted something for all the kids then they should have made them godparent to all the kids.

I think the whole concept of godparents is stupid and I will not give my children any.

 

[Fine 4s]

Thought about you ladies - I was asked by a friends daughter to contribute to a fundraiser. After speaking with her, the mother comes on the line and tells me that although I gave to one child, I'm also expected to give to the other because they are both participating in the same fund raiser.

One word. No, two. ****** annoying!

 

[Enyo]

If I ever get remarried, I'd want a child free wedding. But no kids means no kids. Not even a flower girl. Rose petals aren't that important. The only exception would be his kids if he has any.