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If one more person asks me if this is my real hair!!!!!!

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CarmelCupcake

Well-Known Member
Hi guys, i just need to vent. So this week-end i did my hair and I got a lot of compliments and it made me feel good. On the other hand, an Arabic guy asked me if this was my real hair. Another woman told me that my hair was pretty and then proceeded to ask me if it was my real hair or if I was wearing a sew in. Its pretty annoying because ive put in so much time to nursing my hair back and growing it out for people to assume that its not real. Does any one else experience this?
 
I have never had this happen to me but I would take it as a compliment.

I say who cares if people assume your hair is fake, the more black women rock their real, beautiful hair, the less you will have to answer questions like that.

Represent, Girl. :grin:

ETA:
BTW: Your hair is fly.......Are you sure it's real. LOL j/k :lachen:My hair wants to be like yours when its grows up. :yep: You do a great job with straightening. Looks so light and healthy.
 
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Yeah..happened to me this morning. I woke up this morning and didnt have time to wash my hair so its in a puff and this lady came by patted it and said "I see we got some hair last night." I gave her the evil eye and told it was my hair, and commenced to whip my puff away from her hand.
 
Ask about their breast and/or butt implants. If they make a move to touch the hair, move your hand towards the "implants". Sometimes you have to illustrate the rudeness by example.
 
While I could see how it could be annoying, I would take it as a compliment and keep it moving.
 
Ask about their breast and/or butt implants. If they make a move to touch the hair, move your hand towards the "implants". Sometimes you have to illustrate the rudeness by example.

OMG you made my coffee come out my nose too funny.
 
I was at Applebee's Saturday with my sis and her best friend, who happens to be a very attractive man. Well, two of the servers(females) kept walking past our table and giving me looks. Well, as we leave one of the girls holds the door for us. She ooohed and awwed over his Omega gear and then turns to me and says in a huffy voice "nice hair..." and then giggles under her breath. I said "Thanks, when I take it out tonite I will bring it back for you!" She says " I told her (co-worker) that was a weave." I lean forward ( I am 6 ft 3) and part my hair down to the scalp and say "actually it's not....but I knew that is what you thought." I roll my eyes and walk out.

I will be uploading my photos some time this week. I previously removed all my pics because two showed up on another site and I don't know why or how.

***I mentioned the part about the guy because I think the chic called herself trying to flirt with him and then thought she would make an attempt at embarrassing me in front of him.......Didn't work!***
 
I was at Applebee's Saturday with my sis and her best friend, who happens to be a very attractive man. Well, two of the servers(females) kept walking past our table and giving me looks. Well, as we leave one of the girls holds the door for us. She ooohed and awwed over his Omega gear and then turns to me and says in a huffy voice "nice hair..." and then giggles under her breath. I said "Thanks, when I take it out tonite I will bring it back for you!" She says " I told her (co-worker) that was a weave." I lean forward ( I am 6 ft 3) and part my hair down to the scalp and say "actually it's not....but I knew that is what you thought." I roll my eyes and walk out.

I will be uploading my photos some time this week. I previously removed all my pics because two showed up on another site and I don't know why or how.

***I mentioned the part about the guy because I think the chic called herself trying to flirt with him and then thought she would make an attempt at embarrassing me in front of him.......Didn't work!***

:lachen::lachen:
 
I was at Applebee's Saturday with my sis and her best friend, who happens to be a very attractive man. Well, two of the servers(females) kept walking past our table and giving me looks. Well, as we leave one of the girls holds the door for us. She ooohed and awwed over his Omega gear and then turns to me and says in a huffy voice "nice hair..." and then giggles under her breath. I said "Thanks, when I take it out tonite I will bring it back for you!" She says " I told her (co-worker) that was a weave." I lean forward ( I am 6 ft 3) and part my hair down to the scalp and say "actually it's not....but I knew that is what you thought." I roll my eyes and walk out.

I will be uploading my photos some time this week. I previously removed all my pics because two showed up on another site and I don't know why or how.

***I mentioned the part about the guy because I think the chic called herself trying to flirt with him and then thought she would make an attempt at embarrassing me in front of him.......Didn't work!***


:lol: :blush: :yep: :blush: :lol: :dighole: @ bolded. She probably felt like a load of crap....... LOL
 
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Yeah..happened to me this morning. I woke up this morning and didnt have time to wash my hair so its in a puff and this lady came by patted it and said "I see we got some hair last night." I gave her the evil eye and told it was my hair, and commenced to whip my puff away from her hand.

natural_one you got me rolling over here :rofl: please tell me that you're friends with this lady :lachen:
 
While I could see how it could be annoying, I would take it as a compliment and keep it moving.
I agree. When I first relaxed years ago I got asked all the time if that was my real hair or was I mixed. My hair was btwn APL and BSL. I simply replied yes it is my real hair and no I'm not mixed. I was not annoyed or offended at all, I was actually flattered that peple thought my lil ole hair was fake.
 
natural_one you got me rolling over here :rofl: please tell me that you're friends with this lady :lachen:

Yes, we are work friends. She is alwayyyss making comments about my hair. I have caught her multiple times staring at it. I now think she was trying to figure out if it was real or not. Funny thing is, it isn't even that long, just big.
 
Hi guys, i just need to vent. So this week-end i did my hair and I got a lot of compliments and it made me feel good. On the other hand, an Arabic guy asked me if this was my real hair. Another woman told me that my hair was pretty and then proceeded to ask me if it was my real hair or if I was wearing a sew in. Its pretty annoying because ive put in so much time to nursing my hair back and growing it out for people to assume that its not real. Does any one else experience this?

It's very annoying and very rude. I'm in the minority. I do not see it as a compliment. It's actually a backhanded compliment. He's implying that bw cannot have long, healthy, beautiful hair, which you have.

While I was still transitioning I had a fully natural lady say, "I love your hair." I said, "Thank you." She then says, "Is it a piece?" :blush::nono::perplexed:perplexed I said no. I then looked up at her hair (which was a beautiful fro) and then down at her whole outfit and said, "I like your shoes."

I then walked away.
 
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Wow, my hair wants to be like yours when it grows up. It looks luscious! Don't let those peeps get you upset. BTW, what's your regimen?

Hi guys, i just need to vent. So this week-end i did my hair and I got a lot of compliments and it made me feel good. On the other hand, an Arabic guy asked me if this was my real hair. Another woman told me that my hair was pretty and then proceeded to ask me if it was my real hair or if I was wearing a sew in. Its pretty annoying because ive put in so much time to nursing my hair back and growing it out for people to assume that its not real. Does any one else experience this?
 
Some of these lacefronts are made so good its hard to tell if someone's hair is real or fake. I agree that I'de just take it as a compliment and be proud.

Sent from my ADR6400L using ADR6400L
 
I know I wouldn't be offended at someone thinking my hair was a weave, I would gladly correct them and say thanks! lol
 
It's very annoying and very rude. I'm in the minority. I do not see it as a compliment. It's actually a backhanded compliment. He's implying that bw cannot have long, healthy, beautiful hair, which you have.

While I was still transitioning I had a fully natural lady say, "I love your hair." I said, "Thank you." She then says, "Is it a piece?" :blush::nono::perplexed:perplexed I said no. I then looked up at her hair (which was a beautiful fro) and then down at her whole outfit and said, "I like your shoes."

I then walked away.
But how can we expect others to know we can have nice hair when most of US don't even know it? :ohwell:
 
Where dey do dis at??
Not saying I don't think some of these experiences are valid, but some of the **** y'all been through.....for real for real??

Where all these weave checking, sly commenting, hair grabbing heauxs at?
Not in my area, I guess. Or maybe I just mean mug all day and they're scared.....
 
But how can we expect others to know we can have nice hair when most of US don't even know it? :ohwell:

The thing is, you can't. Why can't folks just leave it as, "Hey I think your hair is gorgeous." Leave it at that, regardless if it's your hair or not.

If the person decides to share if it's her hair or not then I feel that's when you can ask whatever you wanted to ask her.
 
Where dey do dis at??
Not saying I don't think some of these experiences are valid, but some of the **** y'all been through.....for real for real??

Where all these weave checking, sly commenting, hair grabbing heauxs at?
Not in my area, I guess. Or maybe I just mean mug all day and they're scared.....

Girl they do it everywhere. But these are my experiences in VA.

At my old job i even had an Asian man ask, "IS THAT A WEAVE?" out loud. This was after I was complimented on my hair (which was in fact a weave) by my other coworkers.

And then you got the folks that say, "Girl that's a nice weave you got." I tell them, if it isn't a weave, I say, "Thanks, but it's not a weave." then they say, "Oh I thought it was. it's so pretty.:blush:"
 
The thing is, you can't. Why can't folks just leave it as, "Hey I think your hair is gorgeous." Leave it at that, regardless if it's your hair or not.

If the person decides to share if it's her hair or not then I feel that's when you can ask whatever you wanted to ask her.

I agree that people can't help themselves when trying to give compliments and leaving at that without adding the backhanded or ham-fisted rub with it. We live in a day and age where people don't accept social boundaries thus asking inappropriate or at the least, impolite questions of others they don't know well.
 
I guess questions like this is to be expected, especially in the AA community. Unfortunately, for most non-hair educated AA women, weave is ALL they know. In they're mind frame "If it's past SL, With alot of body, Nice Ends, and the person whose head it's on isn't of mixed race...then it MUST be weave". It's sad....but it holds true.
If someone asks me if my hair is a weave, I'd just tell them it's all mine, say a polite "thank you" + fake smile and KIM.
Now if they proceed to "weave-check" me after the fact then things just might get alittle :censored: physical :rolleyes: .........Don't disrespect my personal bubble! lol
 
IDK...it depends on how folk come at me when making the "is that yo' hair" comments. Generally I think I have a knack for picking up on genuine awe versus ignorant mess.

So as long as it isn't ignorant or back-handed...I can let it roll. More often than not, I will take it as an opportunity to educate.

~S~
 
I can understand all points ,I guess it comes down to how you are approached and quite frankly how youre feeling that day... My first day of Esthetics, some lady ( older black lady) wanted to "feel how soft my hair was", she asked, I'll give her that but why do you need to run your fingers across my scalp? what was a weave check, the wench was checking for tracks. When I was in training yesterday, I had on a half wig that was blended so beautifully that even I couldnt tell where it began and a girl I went to Cosmetology school with came out the blue and asked me, "So is that like a sew in? " I was like like :perplexed huh? I told her no, so she says "oh, so you glued it?", I was like :nono: "Booboo not all black women use hair glue, so she said "OMG so all that is your hair?" I told her no, so I let her sit there and waited for her to have the b***s to try to touch it, which she did, :nono: so I could put her in her place. I would not have minded telling her it was a half wig, I dont mind telling anyone, but to automatically assume that it is not my hair does kinda irritate me. When I broke it down to her and then told her the length of my hair, she looked skeptical and asked why I have it braided up. She thought the braids would cause breakage and other misconceptions. She's been trying to grow her hair out from EL since August and its not even SL so I explained how to take care of them. I dont like when I wear my natural hair out and people ask the same questions, it seems like you can never get away from it, so I guess we'll just have to learn to adapt and overcome. Youre damned if you do and damned if you dont, just look good doing it! :lachen: OP Your hair is FAB
 
Take it as a sign that you're doing something right, even though I understand it can/does get irksome after the first couple of times. I won't deny that I think the perception that BW have shorter hair or unhealthy hair comes into play. However, you and a whole bunch of folks (on LHCF, other forums & off-line) are dispelling some myths that we can't grow hair or have beautiful healthy hair whatever the length. Can only be a good thing in the long run, imo.
 
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I get that all the time..Especially if my hair is flat ironed...Whip your hair back & forth,Keep going.....





Happy Hair Growing!
 
You handled it very well.

My situation was worse than yours--by an African American woman coworker who didn't believe me when I unpinned my bun so she could see it. She kept asking questions, hinting that it was just clipped on or was a weave.

Two months later, she decided to do an extensive weave check in front of an Asian coworker. She was shocked when my hair did not fall on the floor, and she didn't find any tracks or glue. You should have seen the look on her face.

My hair stayed on her mind even months later, telling me that my cut was growing out, etc. I said: "Yes, it will be back to waist length in about six months."

I can only imagine what she was thinking.

It was a horrible experience that I created a long thread about it.
 
I get this all the time as well. My co workers tell me that my hair looks like a wig. Try this on for size. I went to this Dominican beauty shop to get a roller set and how about when I walked up to the counter to ask about their prices, the lady said "Is this your real hair?" When I said "yes", She put her hands in the middle of my head and was rubbing my scalp looking for tracks because she didn't believe me. I couldn't do anything but laugh because I could not believe it!
 
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