Would you support your husband

[Faithfullover]

If he never supported you? I heard a lady on the radio yesterday complaining about how her husband never supported her in anything she ever did. She wanted to start a business and he sabotaged it. She wanted to go back to school and he wouldn't keep the kids so she could go. She was sick and had to go to the hospital for something and he wouldn't even take off his job to go see how she was doing.

On the other hand, she supported him through every one of his failed business attempts. She takes off work to go get him medicine. She does whatever she can to help him btu she gets nothing in return.

I know that relationships are supposed to be give and take but to me this is ridiculous. I woudl not put up with someone who treated me like that no matter how much I loved him. I was just wondering how many others out there feel the same way. Would you support a man like this or would you dump him by the wayside?

Mya

 

[andreab]

If he never supported you? I heard a lady on the radio yesterday complaining about how her husband never supported her in anything she ever did. She wanted to start a business and he sabotaged it. She wanted to go back to school and he wouldn't keep the kids so she could go. She was sick and had to go to the hospital for something and he wouldn't even take off his job to go see how she was doing.

On the other hand, she supported him through every one of his failed business attempts. She takes off work to go get him medicine. She does whatever she can to help him btu she gets nothing in return.

I know that relationships are supposed to be give and take but to me this is ridiculous. I woudl not put up with someone who treated me like that no matter how much I loved him. I was just wondering how many others out there feel the same way. Would you support a man like this or would you dump him by the wayside?

Mya

I feel the same way you do. I could stay with this man that was holding me back.

 

[Keen]

Maybe she needs to start pointing these things out to him. It is possible that he is not aware he is doing that to her. Some people can put on their blinders and don't see what they don't want to see.

 

[jamaicasmodona]

I would have to agree with you Faithfullover...
I could not stay with someone who didn't show me the same support I showed them.
Relationships are about compromise and should be a 2 way street... Not a one way..

As you said Ms. Keen, she should address these issues with him and try to resolve it!

 

[DarlingNikki]

I wouldn't support him....I would divorce him. That hospital thing woulda been the final straw. I couldn't be with someone like that at the expense of my happiness....children or no children.

 

[MD_Lady]

I would have never married him in the first place. Selfish, unsupportive behavior generally doesn't surface overnight.

 

[Bunny77]

I would have never married him in the first place. Selfish, unsupportive behavior generally doesn't surface overnight.

Dang it, you said it before I could!

This man never would have become my husband to begin with. I'm sure that sometime during their dating relationship, she discussed her hopes and dreams and he had to have given some indication that he wasn't going to be supportive.

If I had happened to marry him, however, he would have been dumped by the wayside a long time ago. I don't play that.

 

[JustKiya]

I too, would have never married him, assuming the warning signs were there. If he turned all crazy once the kids came - I can do bad on my own - at least I won't have a 250lb weight trying to hold me back.

Reciprocity is the name of the relationship game, yo.

 

[NewYorkgyrl]

She is a fool.

And she is allowing him to treat her that way...that's why he continues to do it. And he knows she will be right there to clean up his mess and pat him on the back to tell him everything will be ok when things go bad (sort of ike his mommy)

Fool me once shame on you fool me twice....you know the rest.

She probably knew he was like this before they even got married.

 

[MissYocairis]

If he never supported you? I heard a lady on the radio yesterday complaining about how her husband never supported her in anything she ever did. She wanted to start a business and he sabotaged it. She wanted to go back to school and he wouldn't keep the kids so she could go. She was sick and had to go to the hospital for something and he wouldn't even take off his job to go see how she was doing.

On the other hand, she supported him through every one of his failed business attempts. She takes off work to go get him medicine. She does whatever she can to help him btu she gets nothing in return.

I know that relationships are supposed to be give and take but to me this is ridiculous. I woudl not put up with someone who treated me like that no matter how much I loved him. I was just wondering how many others out there feel the same way. Would you support a man like this or would you dump him by the wayside?

Mya

I left mine for behaving this way. (among other things) The school thing, the business thing, the illness thing...my exH did the same stuff. It's about control and insecurity. He might even be abusive. Sounds like it to me. She is getting what she ordered. And, until she changes her order, she will continue to get the same.

 

[daydreem2876]

been there, done that (although we never married).... will never do it again.

 

[Nella]

Ha, the very subject I have been thinking about these last few days.

It goes back to a fiance of mine that wanted to support me very little. Did a trial one before the actual marriage and here is how it went.

Car breaks down - not his problem. He fixes his own car that didn't need to be fixed and kept it moving.

Having financial troubles he told me to phone a friend or sell my stuff. It wasn't said jokingly either.

Had a flat- he laid and bed and wouldn't get up til later that evening. He bought fix-a-flat. I asked what was he going to do to help. He said drive you up there and when I'm ready to put my tires on he'll be there. I had to ask him directly would he buy them and he said "no".

Asked to go to a show one morning while the baby was at school and he said he's on a budget so if I want to go I can take myself.

He was upset one day and told me that half of the stuff in the house was his exes. Yet I gave up everything I owned when we got our place together.

Having problems communicating he didn't want to talk.

I spoke of my interest to go to school and he said that's good. Let me know when you go. No questions to ask or show concern that he cared.

I could be gone for hours no call to ask how my day was going. To say that he missed me or anything. If I called him I was disturbing him because he needs his rest and I'm supposed to respect the idea that he works at night.

We would pass each other in the house and he wouldn't speak. I would make dinner and he would stay asleep. I swear in the beginning I thought it was something I had done. I started biting my nails and hair started breaking off because of what I didn't want to admit to myself - I was being emotionally abused. Punished for something. Did I have to be treated this way?

It hasn't been that long since I woke up and lord I tell you it felt like this man was playing games with my head.
What happened to showing me you cared?

Yet, all of this came out just in time. He wanted a greencard for which after knowing that if it didn't work out I would have to support him for ten years. When I saw he wouldn't support me it definitely rung a bell for me. I couldn't and won't allow myself to be tied to a selfish man.

I pray now that after all of this that when the next man comes along I won't ever have to go through this again. Mind you things were completely different before we moved in.

So will I support a man that won't support me - Not ever again. This was truly my testimony and I guess you just have to go through something to truly know.

 

[BrooklynSouth]

No, I would not.

 

[Lebiya]

Never. I wouldn’t even grace him with my time to begin with.

I am NOT one to waste time with a man, no way, no how!

 

[Filmatic]

The first thing I thought was that she is a fool. Been there. He had me standing on the corner of a dark alley waiting on the bus at 12 am when I got off so that he could go sing karaoke.

Second time, I got into my first car wreck ever and was terrified. He still made me take the bus. I got out of that situations. Never before, never again. I was real specific in my prayers, so I am confident in saying never.

It's okay to be bamboozled, it can happen to us all, but if you lay there and wallow in the slop then you bringing it on yourself.

 

[tocktick]

If he never supported you? I heard a lady on the radio yesterday complaining about how her husband never supported her in anything she ever did. She wanted to start a business and he sabotaged it. She wanted to go back to school and he wouldn't keep the kids so she could go. She was sick and had to go to the hospital for something and he wouldn't even take off his job to go see how she was doing.

On the other hand, she supported him through every one of his failed business attempts. She takes off work to go get him medicine. She does whatever she can to help him btu she gets nothing in return.

I know that relationships are supposed to be give and take but to me this is ridiculous. I woudl not put up with someone who treated me like that no matter how much I loved him. I was just wondering how many others out there feel the same way. Would you support a man like this or would you dump him by the wayside?

Mya

No way in hell. Plus, even if I somehow lost my mind and tried to do this, my mother would slap some sense the heck back into me...then she'd probably go after the dude in question .

 

[pinkchocolatedaisy]

ummmmmmmm... in a word...NOPE!

 

[growth2come]

NO, NO AND NOPE! Not in this or any other life time. If I aint getting support then he aint getting it either; so "us" is no more...and I am outta there pronto.