Women don't stay over?

janiebaby

janiebaby

Well-Known Member
This has been a recurring theme over the past week where I'm running into women (black and white) who have men staying over at their place overnight yet they're not staying over the man's place. Some are even hesitant to call these men they're boyfriend. What is starting to happen with the male-female dynamic here because everything I thought was true is not reality at all.
 
i have never had a man half living at my place and as an adult i have always lived alone. there would br overnighters, but nothing like what you described.

that being said, there was a solid month where i stayed over at bfs place before he was bf. he has a nice apartment :look: and hes smack dab in the center of town. i was unemployed at the time and it was heaven tbh.
 
janiebaby said:
This has been a recurring theme over the past week where I'm running into women (black and white) who have men staying over at their place overnight yet they're not staying over the man's place. Some are even hesitant to call these men they're boyfriend. What is starting to happen with the male-female dynamic here because everything I thought was true is not reality at all.
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it depends. if i like my place better than his, if i have to go to work and my place is closest to my job and some other reasons, i would rather he stay at my place instead of me staying at his. also, i have a dog and i cant be staying at someone's place. yea i could bring my dog but its too much much to pack her food, toys etc.
 
Fine 4s said:
Been in situations where they came over more and in this situation, I go over his place. I like it more, train accessible, washer dryer and cable, free heat etc. lol

I have nothing here that he needs or wants. He's so bored when he comes over that sometimes I'm like you wanna go to your place? He'll shake his head yeah lol and we bounce. He's less than 5 mins away driving so....
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...lol this used to be me and SO. With me it all depends on comfort and convenience. I hated my old apartment (small, noisy neighbors, etc...) and his place is more comfy and closer to my job...hence why I moved in with him. :look:
 
is it that they cant or just won't though. I dont stay at mens places(unless like a group of friends crash after a night out) and I dont like company but if I had to choose I'd rather someone to come to me where I'm comfortable.
 
With my last boyfriend, it was a 50/50 split, but I preferred staying at his place because waking up the next day usually involved having really good coffee, bacon, and some frou frou cereal haha.
 
When FH and I were dating, at first we split up the staying over pretty evenly then it kind of evolved into us mostly staying at my place. That was my choice. My place was bigger, more comfortable, I didn't have to pack 50-11 beauty products, I lived in a nicer area, etc.
 
I don't do overnights at this point.

However, my preference would be my place. All them products to be hauling ain't no fun. Plus I don't sleep well in strange beds. Up half the night tossing and turning

____________
*.~.*Sent from a distant Galaxy in the Unicorn-verse*.~.*
 
I haven't done overnights in years :look: But at this point, I almost want to say never again-- my place exclusively. It has everything I need. Sorry. lol
 
For the ladies who prefer their place, does it make a difference if it's on a weekend and you don't have to be somewhere in the morning?
 
i prefer overnights at his place because he lives alone. that's it really. i have roommates and that would be awkward.

now i realize i'm at his place half the week usually. i have my overnight bag...it's not that serious.
 
sounbeweavable said:
For the ladies who prefer their place, does it make a difference if it's on a weekend and you don't have to be somewhere in the morning?
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Even on weekends I still have to do my regular hygiene and maintenance. So that would involve me packing up my waterpik, electric toothbrush, morning skincare products, evening skincare products, clarisonic, body cream, perfume, etc. If I knew we were going out somewhere I would have to pack makeup, makeup brushes, hair tools and products.

All of that was just too much work to be hauling back and forth all the time so we mostly stayed at my place.
 
With my DH, I would stay at his place fairly often because it was closer to my work. But I had a dog, so he would have to go to my house later to deal with the dog when I stayed over, which wasn't ideal.

Honestly, I think that some guys these days are not able to invite women over because they don't have their own place (living with family members or living with a girlfriend/wife/other woman).

I think it's OK to just stay at primarily one person's place occasionally, but if you've NEVER stayed at or even SEEN his place ((red flag)).
 
MizAvalon said:
Even on weekends I still have to do my regular hygiene and maintenance. So that would involve me packing up my waterpik, electric toothbrush, morning skincare products, evening skincare products, clarisonic, body cream, perfume, etc. If I knew we were going out somewhere I would have to pack makeup, makeup brushes, hair tools and products.

All of that was just too much work to be hauling back and forth all the time so we mostly stayed at my place.
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why can't you just leave your stuff there? bf bought a lot of the things id need to leave there... for example at first we had a sex and the city moment where he gave me a spare toothbrush head and we used the same electric brush. but then he broke it and bought new ones and got sonicare instead, and he got two - one for me to leave there. i leave toiletries there instead of carrying it around (except a shower gel and face wash that i carry in my gym bag for if i go straight to the gym after work). i have a drawer in the closet. and i leave my makeup in my purse. idk, i'm there so much that it makes more sense to leave more stuff there than take it home.
 
emilymichelle said:
why can't you just leave your stuff there? bf bought a lot of the things id need to leave there... for example at first we had a sex and the city moment where he gave me a spare toothbrush head and we used the same electric brush. but then he broke it and bought new ones and got sonicare instead, and he got two - one for me to leave there. i leave toiletries there instead of carrying it around (except a shower gel and face wash that i carry in my gym bag for if i go straight to the gym after work). i have a drawer in the closet. and i leave my makeup in my purse. idk, i'm there so much that it makes more sense to leave more stuff there than take it home.
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Eventually I did start leaving some things there, the things that were feasible for me to leave there. But I wasn't going to buy doubles of my expensive products just so I could have the exact same stuff at his place. Spend 5 or 6 hundred dollars just so I can have my beauty arsenal at your place? No, how about you just sleep over here? My bed is more comfy anyway.:lachen:
 
It's not just black and white women. A couple of my law school friends are doing this. One is Vietnamese (she's engaged though) and the other is Guamanian (she just broke up with her 7-year ex when she caught him cheating on her.):look: My friend who's Mexican has her own apartment but spends most of her time at her boyfriend's place. (He's Iranian) Point is it's an American thing.
 
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I have spent sporadic nights over a guy's house and vice versa but I don't leave stuff and I didn't want him to leave stuff. Since I am divorced and a bit older than a few of you poster's (40+ ), spending the night is not exciting to me, I would rather go home or have them leave. All the guy's I have dated lived alone and were homeowners like me.

One guy I was seeing thought he did something wrong because I left after he knocked it out of the park. I just wanted to sleep in my own bed.
 
I spend most of my time at my guy's place. And we were together for 6 months before he even came to my house for a day visit. I just like my space and am very particular about things. I didn't want him touching anything and moving stuff and worst of all using my shampoos and conditioners. The first time he spent the night at my house he left my bathroom a mess, towels all bunched up on the towel rack. I had to silent scream into a pillow a few times. :lol: Yes, it was that serious for me.

When I started spending every weekend at his place, I packed up some lotions and hair stuff to keep over there in his bathroom. And now his bathroom is practically overrun with my stuff. I wouldn't have it any other way. My home is my sanctuary.
 
I prefer that my boyfriend stay with me when we have overnights. I have a nicer place, I'm in a convenient location. I live alone. I have all of my stuff here... If I stayed over at his place, I'd have to trek back and I don't like the idea of doing that (Although he probably wouldn't let me. He likes escorting me to my front door.) I'm the more high maintenance one when it comes to getting ready in the morning and he's very simple and easy. So this works out better. Plus, he insists upon doing my dishes and making the bed. :)

My 2 good gal pals also prefer that their boyfriends stay over. They just have nicer, more convenient digs than their men!
 
We spend most of our time at his place. We work together in the same city that he lives in. I live a good 20 mins (minus traffic) away in another city. If we both get off at the same time and have to be back at work it is much more convienent for me to just stay the night than drive all the way home just to return back to work. Besides i have nothing to do at my house. He came over once and the poor thing was bored out of his mind. He has all of the tvs tablets and gizmos and gadgets and netflix plus he cooks sooo.... :look: i use my place when i want me time.
 
mallysmommy said:
We spend most of our time at his place. We work together in the same city that he lives in. I live a good 20 mins (minus traffic) away in another city. If we both get off at the same time and have to be back at work it is much more convienent for me to just stay the night than drive all the way home just to return back to work. Besides i have nothing to do at my house. He came over once and the poor thing was bored out of his mind. He has all of the tvs tablets and gizmos and gadgets and netflix plus he cooks sooo.... :look: i use my place when i want me time.
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where is your kid?
 
I don't care for all the sleeping at each others places all the time at all. His or her place.

Sent from yacht with Beyonce & Blue
 
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