Why Is The Birth Of A Second Child So Hard On Marriages?

[LovelyNaps26]

I feel so drained with bed time duties when all I'm dealing with is the start of my cycle. I've already prepped my resignation letter for bed time duties the moment I see a second line. I have no idea how long TTC will take when we start in a few months but last time I was dead dog tired for a month, which is pretty good compared to what some women face. Plus I have a boy and at 2 he like to play rough. When he was playing his kicking game while i was dressing him and almost hit my stomach I disciplined him but filed it away as another thing DH will have to do.

 

[jerseyhaircare]

I have a 2 y/o and 4 y/o. The first baby was super easy because she has an easy personality and is a people pleaser. When I had the second child, had to deal with some jealousy and regression but DH stepped up and spent a large portion of time with her which helped the transition. It was rough the first year of having two because you realized that you need to learn how to manage time and different personalities. Tricks that worked with DD1 didn't do anything for DD2. But now they are potty trained, fully verbal, and well behaved, I love having two children-they play together and talk all day long and they are lots of fun. So I would say the first two years are hard but gets better.

ETA: However, the reason why its hard on a marriage is your husband is going have to accept playing second fiddle for a while. I know I felt overwhelmed the first two years and placed him on the back burner. For me, it was also much harder to find time to take care of myself-looks, clothes, etc and I had no desire to be touched since I felt I was being touched by my kids all the dang time. Thankfully he was patient and things have improved greatly since weaning the second kid.

 

[caribeandiva]

As back-up birth control?

Hey, can’t take any chances...

 

[writtenthought]

Everyone I know has had a hard time with the 1st child. But two of my friends both just had their 2nd child and both are broken up

 

[writtenthought]

I have a 12 year old and a 3 years old. The 1st child was an adjustment, but still wonderful and happy, we just got a little disconnected, the 2nd was fine.