"Why do so many blacks prefer straight hair?"

[I Am So Blessed]

LOL. i dont really like bone straight hair, i like my hair straight/wavy enough to hang and blow on my back in the wind. it looks sexier when theres all this hair blowing around and guys just stop and look. i love the hang. and when im watching tv with just my bra on i fell all this hair on my back like blanket, makes me feel feminine, then i look over had my man staring at it lol. he loves to touch it.

...........i love being texlaxed.

hey i was natural for 24.5 years and i loved that too. i just love hair period.

 

[tHENATuRALhAiRpRoJEcT]

That show his ignorance. Time as is defined by the clock is actually a European construct<---- kinda touched on this after being prompted

My brother's godparents are both anthropologists and their literature collection asserts and confirms that in the brown cultures, the concern is just getting it done...not getting it done by 10:15.
<-----lol, yes exactly what he later explained (along with our acceptance of being larger and largely overweight culture).

It was an argument that I had to stay out of b/c of my always being tardy for the party (at least in class)

----------^^^^^^

 

[*CherryPie*]

Some of y'all are way too serious about hair!

All of the history of slavery, and inferiority, etc........

It's getting so old.

Maybe most blacks prefer straight hair because they like the way it looks.

 

[tHENATuRALhAiRpRoJEcT]

ITA. I call it "the why behind the why."

The following commentary I found on another site (non-hair related) and it pretty much sums up my opinion on the subject. Since the OP wants everyone to play nice, I feel that this is a safer option for me because if I say what's really on my mind...well....trust me. Here goes:

i'm just gonna linger off topic again & say i graduated from high school with the confederate flag as a HUGE emblem on our diploma.... fought to try to get it of
they said "either accept a blank slate....or this flag)

also painted in our school hallway.... yes i'm of the south....nearly 10 yrs ago

we still have so far to go

 

[I Am So Blessed]

i'm just gonna linger off topic again & say i graduated from high school with the confederate flag as a HUGE emblem on our diploma.... fought to try to get it of
they said "either accept a blank slate....or this flag)

also painted in our school hallway.... yes i'm of the south....nearly 10 yrs ago

we still have so far to go

dayum.... thats sad but im not suprised, like c'mon.... satan is in THIS WORLD just as the good book says, so nothing like this shocks me.

anywho back to hair. flowing hair is just down right sexyyyy!!!

 

[washize]

Some of y'all are way too serious about hair!

All of the history of slavery, and inferiority, etc........

It's getting so old.

Maybe most blacks prefer straight hair because they like the way it looks.

yeah it does get old, but seriously how many post do you read here daily, about how someones mother or grandmother are telling new naturals how bad their hair looks and how they need a relaxer, and how no man or job is going to want them because of their hair. And I know growing up allot of black girls got asked about their wide noses, kinky hair, and blah blah blah. As an adult you see this as ignorance, but as a child it is damaging and you do grow to hate that feature about yourself. Some people realize that there was/is nothing wrong with them, and some people never get over the damage

It is really getting old, hopefully the new generations can let kinky and black be free. I know when I adopt my children and they ask "mom why isn't my hair or my skin, or est like this, I'm going to say because you are not white. Why don't they look like you? Your hair is beautiful and you are beautiful"

 

[kmn1980]

I know when I adopt my children and they ask "mom why isn't my hair or my skin, or est like this, I'm going to say because you are not white. Why don't they look like you? Your hair is beautiful and you are beautiful"

When my kids get old enough to ask, I'm going to give them the same type of explanation only mine will include the terms "original" and "recessive" .

 

[I Am So Blessed]

When my kids get old enough to ask, I'm going to give them the same type of explanation only mine will include the terms "original" and "recessive" .

growing up, my sister and i never asked questions liike that it was always in us to know that God made all different races. just like we never asked why is the sky blue, we just knew that it was blue. i dont know if its becuase we were raised in church or not but we always knew there was a great creator and that he created everything the way he wanted so we never needed those type of questions answered. did i make sence?

oh well

 

[HappilyLiberal]

yeah it does get old, but seriously how many post do you read here daily, about how someones mother or grandmother are telling new naturals how bad their hair looks and how they need a relaxer, and how no man or job is going to want them because of their hair. And I know growing up allot of black girls got asked about their wide noses, kinky hair, and blah blah blah. As an adult you see this as ignorance, but as a child it is damaging and you do grow to hate that feature about yourself. Some people realize that there was/is nothing wrong with them, and some people never get over the damage

It is really getting old, hopefully the new generations can let kinky and black be free. I know when I adopt my children and they ask "mom why isn't my hair or my skin, or est like this, I'm going to say because you are not white. Why don't they look like you? Your hair is beautiful and you are beautiful"

And hopefully those who wish to wear their hair straight will be free to do so without a bunch of natural Nazis insinuating they are brainwashed or engage in self-hatred because of a hairstyle!

 

[JuiceMobsta]

Some of y'all are way too serious about hair!

All of the history of slavery, and inferiority, etc........

It's getting so old.

Maybe most blacks prefer straight hair because they like the way it looks.

And most blacks preferring straight hair because of them liking the way it looks leads right back to all the history of slavery, and inferiority,etc. ...An endless cycle.

 

[KurlyNinja]

A lot of people say straight hair is easier to take care of... Is it really? Because I've seen lots of black women with straight hair that looks like they don't what to do with it. Or is it because you just think its easier? I'm pretty sure there are a lot of people who would argue that their own natural hair coming out of their head is easier for them to take care of then chemically altered hair.

The whole white is better issue has been pushed on us so long that we don't even see it as that anymore... I WISH people would chose straight hair JUST because they wanted it, but half the time this is not true...

 

[SweetTea]

It's kind of beating a dead horse, but it's because it's what most of us were brought up to like. When I was little, my mom pressed my hair every week and then relaxed me when I was 4 or 5. I used to have a serious complex about my new growth, being relaxed so young. I hated the feel of it. I remember once, I took scissors and snipped away the new growth at my nape because it didn't "feel right."

And then my parents wondered why I had problems being black when I was little. Even just in the early 90's when I was a kid, I don't remember black women being acknowledged as much as they are today. I thought only white women were pretty/could be pretty. My mom would always tell me, "Black women are pretty. Don't feel bad about yourself." and then turn around and tell me I didn't have "pretty white-girl hair" when I would get my hair wet.

But what I find interesting is, so many white people seem fascinated by our hair/want to know why we straighten, but how many of them would actually want our hair? My guess is, not many. Like someone else said, straight hair can be turned kinky. Some Asian people do it because they like the look.

I think white people don't get kinky hair because they don't want it. They complain about having to do a quick wash most/every day, so the detangling, moisturizing, etc. would blow their minds. This isn't anything against your friend, OP. I have white friends that ask similar questions.

 

[jennboo]

The bolded leads me to believe you know exactly why.... but for those don't know...

Colonization

it's pretty sad too....

Red bolded: That's it, point blank period.

If we were the dominant race who had colonized, ruled, and oppressed european cultures at the time with our kinky hair and dark skin, kinky hair and dark skin would be the ideal. Since it happened the other way, we subscribe to the white skin/straighter hair ideal even though it is impossible for us to attain that.

Black folks idolizing straight hair and light skin is not a coincidence. It has jack to do with ease of styling, manageability and any of the other reasons thrown around.

 

[JJamiah]

I straighten my hair because I like it straight. Period, no deep meaning, no extra toss in the mix, no secret meaning.

I have Wyt friends who ask questions and they are very unknowing and their kids ask too, not rude either, the kids (How do you get your hair like that? ) it's a kid question and plenty more until they were like COOL! and proceeded to tell me about theirs like I didn't know already LOL. There is no secret meaning. My friend colors her hair every 3 weeks. I relax every 4 months. We ask each other questions. I think when you always OVER ANALYZE things you waste your time thnking to hard. If I meant to say something I would and tend to be with people of the like. Some people need to take a CHILL PILL and relax it's not that deep. Yes we do have a way to go, but please don't start wearing the other shoe, because then we will just keep the cycle going.

Don't worry about why someone is doing what their doing if your spending more than a minute it is a Minute wasted of your life.Ask a question or Keep it moving!

 

[JJamiah]

It's kind of beating a dead horse, but it's because it's what most of us were brought up to like. When I was little, my mom pressed my hair every week and then relaxed me when I was 4 or 5. I used to have a serious complex about my new growth, being relaxed so young. I hated the feel of it. I remember once, I took scissors and snipped away the new growth at my nape because it didn't "feel right."

And then my parents wondered why I had problems being black when I was little. Even just in the early 90's when I was a kid, I don't remember black women being acknowledged as much as they are today. I thought only white women were pretty/could be pretty. My mom would always tell me, "Black women are pretty. Don't feel bad about yourself." and then turn around and tell me I didn't have "pretty white-girl hair" when I would get my hair wet.


But what I find interesting is, so many white people seem fascinated by our hair/want to know why we straighten, but how many of them would actually want our hair? My guess is, not many. Like someone else said, straight hair can be turned kinky. Some Asian people do it because they like the look.

I think white people don't get kinky hair because they don't want it. They complain about having to do a quick wash most/every day, so the detangling, moisturizing, etc. would blow their minds. This isn't anything against your friend, OP. I have white friends that ask similar questions.

I am loving his hair

 

[jennboo]

Also, i don't believe that the OP's friend was being malicious in her questioning about this subject. Some white folks truly don't know...why? because they don't NEED to know. What's it to them? I had a russian guy friend who could not understand why black woman always ran off to get relaxers. I said it was to attain hair like his. He was kind of like ok, but that's so stupid natural hair is beautiful. I agreed

 

[yora88]

Did you ask her why white women like dark skin? Or why they like big lips? Or why they start wearing makeup at the age of 11?

At the end of the day, every woman just wants to feel/be beautiful. Everybody's definition of beauty is different.

 

[LadyRaider]

Why do white women prefer straight hair? Sarah Jessica Parker straightens hers. The girl from Dirty Dancing (forget her name) straightens hers. She also got her nose fixed which to me messed up her face. Why do white women fix their noses?

Why do white women not like the color of their hair? (I'm truly curious.) What's wrong with the curly, mousy brown hair God gave them?

 

[LadyRaider]

Did you ask her why white women like dark skin? Or why they like big lips? Or why they start wearing makeup at the age of 11?

At the end of the day, every woman just wants to feel/be beautiful. Everybody's definition of beauty is different.

Ah you beat me to it. The make up thing is another thing. I remember in jr high this white teacher getting on me for not wearing make up like the white girls. You are so right about that. I didn't need make up then. My skin was flawless and beautiful brown already.

 

[arosieworld]

As far a your post goes I prefer curly hair but when I was young I just wanted to have hair like my mom. I think beyond all the deep stuff for a lot of girls that is a big reason. I grew up seeing my mom with bone straight hair (she is mixed doesn't relax) her hair could have been orange and I would have wanted it.

I've known this girl for years. She was truly curious. I guess I might add that we were laughing about how in high school when I use to wear a straight long weave EVERYDAY for four years. Today was the first day she saw me with my natural hair.

But then again... you never know

You DO know. Don't let other peoples views make you question a relationship that has been good to/for you. My Bff is white and like you I have known her for years. If someone ever overheard some of our conversations they would think horrible things about both of us. Because she is your friend the walls are down she feels like she can ask you things she would never ask anyone else because you love her and won't judge. I am sure you've used that to your benefit as well and asked some crazy things, I know I have. Not all white people are looking for validation of their whiteness and only you know if she is.

 

[LadyRaider]

Yeah okay. But friends can be ignorant. I personally think it is a ridiculous question. Right now ALL (or at least most) women are straightening their hair. Whatever her reason for straightening her hair (or her sister's or her mom's) is most likely the same as black women's reasons.

Straight hair is fun. Straight hair shows your length. Straight hair is in style now, you see it all over in the media. Blacks and whites are subject to the same media images. What... are we supposed to be somehow different or even stronger than other cultures? We want to be what we see reflected in the culture. Just like everyone else.

 

[sweetlaughter]

Speaking from my own personal experiences, I think I just didn't know how to style natural hair like I did straight hair so I preferred straight growing up. I also had no idea about haircare natural, relaxed, whatever.

I'm learning every day now about hair and debunking myths. Like when I spoke with my Chinese friend who explained to me that not all Asians have straight hair. The look on my face was like . Her sister and mom have wavy hair. She then went on to explain to me that she knows a lot of Asian women who faithfully get their Japanese style straightener every six months.

 

[Solitude]

Girl, don't you know? Black people read books, major in English and Philosophy, go to law school and medical school, become vegetarians and vegans, convert to Catholicism, play tennis and golf, summer in the Hamptons, travel abroad, play classical musical instruments, run marathons, and drive hybrids, use organic products, shop at Whole Foods, adopt babies from Africa, wear Ed Hardy, go to Ivy League Schools, recycle, eat sushi, sip wine, go camping, and straighten our hair to be WHITE.

*sarcasm*

 

[jennboo]

Yeah okay. But friends can be ignorant. I personally think it is a ridiculous question. Right now ALL (or at least most) women are straightening their hair. Whatever her reason for straightening her hair (or her sister's or her mom's) is most likely the same as black women's reasons.

Straight hair is fun. Straight hair shows your length. Straight hair is in style now, you see it all over in the media. Blacks and whites are subject to the same media images. What... are we supposed to be somehow different or even stronger than other cultures? We want to be what we see reflected in the culture. Just like everyone else.

This goes back to skin color as well. The media bombards us with images of white people or lighter skinned, non-white folks. But if someone came into this thread defending their preference for light skin with the argument that "we want to be what we see reflected in the media" all hell would break loose. The preference for light skin and the preference for straight hair is one in the same to me. It comes from the same place. I just find it interesting that people will lambast folks who want to bleach their skin but think it's fine and dandy to chemicalize their hair.

 

[ichephren]

I am Nigerian and agree that our idea of time is generalized based on the time of the day. I also agree that Black people are usually louder than Whites. I do not think this is a bad thing though. Loud = level of fun someone is having. For the example of the Church, I would say that Black churches are probably more fun to go to than White churches. I have actually gone to both because my family moved so much when I was young. Everybody would be asleep in predominantly white churches. In mixed churches, there was more life. In Black churches (esp in Nigeria), there is too much activity to sleep.

So, I guess I agree with this professor dude, but I don't really take offense to it. I think it's unnatural and unnecessary to make everything in life due by an artificially created clock. I also celebrate our Black loudness...we know how to get our party on. And yes, I notice this also applies to other "brown" people.

That shows his ignorance. Time as is defined by the clock is actually a European construct. All the brown races went by the position of the sun. Go to an AA, Mexican, Cuban, African, Native American, etc...event and you'll see people arriving later than the stated "time" and often bringing people that weren't invited.

My brother's godparents are both anthropologists and their literature collection asserts and confirms that in the brown cultures, the concern is just getting it done...not getting it done by 10:15.

There is no such thing as time. There is only past, present and future.

As for the "loud" thing...well, I do believe that different cultures express emotion in different ways. Go into the average white church and then the average "minority" church and you'll see that even though they are purportedly praising the same God, their ways of going about it are totally different with whites often being reserved.

 

[lovelexi]

Its not just blacks that prefer straight hair, its whites, asians, hispanics, etc. I think its a universal thing. Even Caucasians with naturally curly hair alter their hair by blow drying and flat ironing for a sleeker straighter look

 

[jennboo]

Girl, don't you know? Black people read books, major in English and Philosophy, go to law school and medical school, become vegetarians and vegans, convert to Catholicism, play tennis and golf, summer in the Hamptons, travel abroad, play classical musical instruments, run marathons, and drive hybrids, use organic products, shop at Whole Foods, adopt babies from Africa, wear Ed Hardy, go to Ivy League Schools, recycle, eat sushi, sip wine, go camping, and straighten our hair to be WHITE.

*sarcasm*

Those sounds like your own generalizations regarding the lifestyles and preferences of whites vs. blacks. The truth is none of the above posted are endemic to certain races of people, as are hair texture and skin color.

 

[Solitude]

Those sounds like your own generalizations regarding the lifestyles and preferences of whites vs. blacks. The truth is none of the above posted are endemic to certain races of people, as are hair texture and skin color.

My point is that I do about half the things on this list and none of it, including straightening my hair, is because I want to be white.

Your constant referrals to colonization infer that black people are incapable of making choices based on our own preferences.


By the way, my list was not based on my own idea; it was based on a very popular website: http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/full-list-of-stuff-white-people-like/

 

[darlingdiva]

Still be careful. White privilege isn't alleviated through friendship or other relationships. It will be pulled out when necessary and beneficial to the person, regardless of his or her friends, spouses/lovers, etc.

Next thing you know other "innocent" questions will arise, like "Why do black people want light skin?" or "Why are black people so loud?" Remember, you can always say that you aren't the spokeswoman for black people.

THIS IS TRUE!!! Last summer, DH and I had gone to the beach w/ some friends. Our white "friend" was driven home by one of our other male friends of African descent. The cops started tailing his car & pulled him over. While the cops were tailing the car, the white "friend" repeatedly asked him if he had any warrants and he repeatedly said no. After she asked him for about the fifth time, the white "friend" said that she was asking because one out of four Black men get arrested.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

I think assimilation plays a huge part in blacks' preference of straight hair. It's not to look more "white" but to look more "American." But I guess those terms could be interchangeable because people tend to look at those as one and same. Ex. the term "All-American"

Secondly, I think curiosity is another big thing. We have kinky, curly hair so we prefer the opposite look - straight. How many times have you heard white women talk about trying to curl their hair for a special event? Same with black women who straighten for certain occasions ... or all the time. Each people have their own ideas of "exotic" or "different."