AltheaGarden
New Member
This might seem weird... but my boyfriend. I was texlaxed when we first started dating and I loved seeing natural hair on other women... I was just afraid I wouldn't look attractive with natural hair.
My boyfriend is actually white and would comment positively on women with natural hair. Eventually he began asking me if I could wear my hair like that and why I don't because he thinks it is sexy. I was in shock but very impressed in his taste.
About 5 or 6 months into our relationship I had a bad experience with my stylist and had to cut my APL hair to SL. A month later I went back to her asking her to cut more off because I decided to transition to natural. I was nervous at first but my boyfriend reassured me that I would look beautiful no matter the texture or length of my hair... And that was that!
I feel sort of shallow when I admit this to people... because it comes off as "I went natural because my boyfriend likes natural hair." But really, my boyfriend just gave me the confidence I needed to go natural. I always knew I would eventually do it... I just did not think I would do it in my 20s.
This doesn't seem weird at all. A long term black BF of mine that had dreads and lived an extreme green life style would always bug me about going natural. He said that my hair would look really beautiful natural and he even offered to buzz off my hair (this was not even an option for me). And I made up tons of excuses as to why I couldn't grow out the relaxer: all of my hair would break off, I retain hair better when it's straight, I don't have the best face shape for natural hair, I wouldn't be attractive, yadda yadda yadda.
Then I had a white BF that was just completely perplexed by my hair care routine. I explained to him what a relaxer is, he didn't get it. One day we literally got into an argument because I was taking WAY to long to get ready to go somewhere (I admit this) because I was flat ironing my hair. He kept asking my why on earth was I flat ironing hair that was already relaxed straight. One day I was complaining about wanting thicker hair, he told me that if I stop relaxing my hair it would be thicker. At the time that comment made me mad lol.
I was really stubborn and refused to transition for anyone else, especially a dude, even if they did have my best interest in mind. It wasn't until two years after I broken up with the white BF that I realized that both dudes had made valid points. Though my ultimate decision to transition was based on wanting to eliminate harmful chemicals and embrace my heritage, I definitely acknowledge the fact that those two BFs were the first to help me realize that I should be who I am.
For the bold area, I feel the same way. I knew it would happen some day because I couldn't fathom being in my 60s and still getting my hair relaxed, just didn't know when. I am happy that I made the decision now.