White Dude Gets With Indian/guyanese Girl But Doesn't Want His Kid To Be Too Brown

[SheenaVee]

I have some lukewarm tea about DH's friend. I was looking for that 'tea in real life thread' but couldn't find it so I just thought I'd make a new thread.

So DH has this friend who is half Indian and half Guyanese. He's known her since they were like 12 or something but they don't keep in touch that regularly nowadays so this was random.

She messaged him saying her fiancé (white) just said if they have kids he doesn't want them to be too brown. He wants them to look Mediterranean. Then she calls DH crying about it and DH said he could hear her dude in the background shouting and they started having an argument so he just hung up.

First of all I said to DH, Why is she calling and messaging you though?

So he messages her back saying 'you need to discuss it with him and let him know how the comment made you feel, not call me'.

She messages back saying 'sorry for getting you involved I just needed a friend.' And she's told him in the past that he's the only white guy she knows that isn't ignorant and unbiased. So she's all venting saying her fiancé is ignorant and he disgusts her and he says all kind of ignorant ish and he finds it funny when he sees a white guy with a black girl. And to top it off, dude is joining the police in January .

I'm thinking, girl, you better not still be marrying this dude.

DH was tested many times during our relationship because there was no way I was gonna go through this kind of mess. I have lhcf to thank for that because y'all made me hyper aware of any racist ignorant ish so I was on the lookout. Thankfully he passed the tests.

 

[movingforward]

Obviously her fiancé fell the test.

There is a youtube couple, she's black american (dark brown skinned) and he's Korean american (1st Gen in my opinion) and he made a random comment about how their children are going to look. Like he doesn't want his kid to have dark skin.....maybe i was wrong.

My thing is if you are going to date/marry outside of your ethnic group, expect your children to be a good combination of you both.

 

[Philippians413]

I've heard this same sentiment multiple times...and it's usually after the child is already born. DH's friend should just be happy she found out before the wedding.

 

[theRaven]

I've heard this same sentiment multiple times...and it's usually after the child is already born. DH's friend should just be happy she found out before the wedding.

Exactly cut your losses and be happy he showed himself before the cemented marriage.

 

[PeaceFlow]

So she's all venting saying her fiancé is ignorant and he disgusts her and he says all kind of ignorant ish and he finds it funny when he sees a white guy with a black girl.

She already knew something was wrong with him waaaaaaay before accepting the ring.

Come off my phoneline KMT.

 

[LaFaraona]

I have some lukewarm tea about DH's friend. I was looking for that 'tea in real life thread' but couldn't find it so I just thought I'd make a new thread.

So DH has this friend who is half Indian and half Guyanese. He's known her since they were like 12 or something but they don't keep in touch that regularly nowadays so this was random.

She messaged him saying her fiancé (white) just said if they have kids he doesn't want them to be too brown. He wants them to look Mediterranean. Then she calls DH crying about it and DH said he could hear her dude in the background shouting and they started having an argument so he just hung up.

First of all I said to DH, Why is she calling and messaging you though?

So he messages her back saying 'you need to discuss it with him and let him know how the comment made you feel, not call me'.

She messages back saying 'sorry for getting you involved I just needed a friend.' And she's told him in the past that he's the only white guy she knows that isn't ignorant and unbiased. So she's all venting saying her fiancé is ignorant and he disgusts her and he says all kind of ignorant ish and he finds it funny when he sees a white guy with a black girl. And to top it off, dude is joining the police in January .

I'm thinking, girl, you better not still be marrying this dude.

DH was tested many times during our relationship because there was no way I was gonna go through this kind of mess. I have lhcf to thank for that because y'all made me hyper aware of any racist ignorant ish so I was on the lookout. Thankfully he passed the tests.

Obviously her fiancé fell the test.

There is a youtube couple, she's black american (dark brown skinned) and he's Korean american (1st Gen in my opinion) and he made a random comment about how their children are going to look. Like he doesn't want his kid to have dark skin.....maybe i was wrong.

My thing is if you are going to date/marry outside of your ethnic group, expect your children to be a good combination of you both.

I am here looking like hm .
These series of emoticons best describe my sentiment
What I really want to know is how do these non-black man Really feel about the black skin of their Black so. Forget the hypothetical children. How do they Really feel about the Black (woman) skin they are laying up next to and inside of?
Do these bw stop and really reflect about how their so are viewing them? Because it is not an indictment on the hypothetical or not children it is an indictment on the Black woman they are laying up with and are married to. This sounds like some twisted, depraved emotionally abusive ish.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

People be holding on to problems that ain't problems.

He don't want brown babies. Then he gets zero babies from her. This does not have to be hard. Like not at all.

Wait, I thought Guyanese is black. Even if he half, plus light skinned Indian, how he think he go make lightskinned babies with a black woman?

 

[Menina Preta]

People be holding on to problems that ain't problems.

He don't want brown babies. Then he gets zero babies from her. This does not have to be hard. Like not at all.

Wait, I thought Guyanese is black. Even if he half, plus light skinned Indian, how he think he go make lightskinned babies with a black woman?

Some Guyanese are full Indians. Indians immigrated over there in the 1800s as indentured servants.

Anyways, the woman in the OP already knew how he truly felt and she kept going with it. Now she's about to marry and is having regrets that she picked that old racist summabi**.

 

[LeftRightRepeat]

Sounds like she is Guyanese ..half indian Guyanese and half black Guyanese. I think Guyana is like 50% indian?
Anyway theres no reasoning with "love ". She will just have to leave him if the child is too dark ​

 

[SheenaVee]

DH said she just looks Indian so I guess she's Indian Guyanese, not black.

 

[Menina Preta]

DH said she just looks Indian so I guess she's Indian Guyanese, not black.

She a lie and already knew what nonsense the guy was preaching. South Asians, especially the diasporic ones, need a pride movement akin to Black Pride from the 60s/70s. They can be very self-hating.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Oh I see the fiance is white.

I don't know what he expect her to do but I expect her to know this situation is impossible. So he don't get no babies. If she wants babies then it's time to move on to somebody else.

 

[LeftRightRepeat]

I googled Indian Guyanese and they look brown to me.

One of my best friends in high school was a very light skinned indian . When she migrated to the US she started passing as white . complexion would depend on which part of India her family came from originally and who they married in guyana.

 

[junipertree]

DH said she just looks Indian so I guess she's Indian Guyanese, not black.

But is she fair skinned Indian looking or brown/darker skinned Indian looking? There are both kinds in Guyana though they are usually brown.

Either way dude doesn't get to pick a shade for his future kids. Even if she's lighter who knows what throwback genes she has. Not sure what she's crying about. She has a wedding that needs to be cancelled. Chop chop.

 

[DeepBluSea]

With all this Trump stuff about harassing blacks people, brown people, Asian people. .. an Asian Indian aquaintence admitted he's glad his kids "take after their mother". He's married to a white woman. He's the color of Roland Martin.

 

[VirtuousGal]

There are definitely Blacks and Indians and even Chinese there, by friend's mom who was born in Guyana is half black, half chinese. It's much like a lot of the Caribbean as far as the mixing goes.

 

[SheenaVee]

Just had a snoop on her WhatsApp picture. Ironically, she's got a picture of her and her dude on there.

She's brown.

 

[Foxglove]

I bet she stays with him

 

[yaya24]

He's probably not getting Mediterranean looking children with a brown Guyanese/ Indian woman.

She has a few options-

1) Stay
a) have possible brown babies
b) have no babies
c) adopt
d) carry Mediterranean embryos
e) possibly have lighter babies

2) Leave

 

[junipertree]

Oh I see the fiance is white.

I don't know what he expect her to do but I expect her to know this situation is impossible. So he don't get no babies. If she wants babies then it's time to move on to somebody else.

She won't. IME Indian women are obsessed with dating/marrying white, especially those in the States. Hence her tears.

 

[Shimmie]

@SheenaVee ...

Please guard your marriage, it is sacred and it is a precious gift...your husband chose YOU among all others to marry. It is obvious that he treasures you as a gift to him. It is obvious that you love him too.

There are far too many anti-white opinions here on LHCF, which you may take to heart and unjustly misappropriate upon your husband.

You have your own instincts and you have prayer...you know better than anyone the beauty of the love that you and your husband share. Guard your heart from being pulled into the anti-white comments which could turn your heart away from the man you love and married. Guard your heart for words have power.

God bless you and your husband.

 

[kikigirl]

Discernment is important in all matters. LHCF can go overboard with black pride/love which sometimes comes across as anti-IR. When I open a thread that is going too far, I tiptoe back out. Simple.

Now, as to this situation, a white man who does not want darker-skin children yet marries a dark woman is a HUGE red flag. There is no sugar coating it: you have deep-seated issues with the mom if you're worried about having kids that resemble her. Getting married to this dude is signing herself up for a lifetime of misery and second-guessing whether her husband even loves her or just tolerates her. Why would a woman do this to herself?!

 

[qchelle]

Yo I could've sworn you said your dh was black lol

 

[DarkJoy]

I'm for IR for BW not BM who have a plethora of gorgeous and snart BW to choose from.

Homegirl got a reality check with this dude. I hope she heeds it.

 

[SheenaVee]

Yo I could've sworn you said your dh was black lol

I'm pretty sure you said to me on another thread a while back you thought my DH was black and I said no, he isn't. You just want me to be with a black man, huh?

 

[qchelle]

I'm pretty sure you said to me on another thread a while back you thought my DH was black and I said no, he isn't. You just want me to be with a black man, huh?

I was thinking of the same thing! I know we had this convo before! but I swear I remember it going: I said I thought your SO was white. ..and you responded no, he's black! guess I am confused af lmao

 

[intellectualuva]

Simple problem. Simple solution.

She knows what to do.

 

[VivaMac]

A friend of mine had the opposite problem. Her DH was mad confused when the baby came out "white" According to my friend her DH asked the nurse if they had the right baby, because she should at least be tan. She is tan now, but for the longest time she looked like his people.

As for your DH friend, she needs to be watched, why is she calling your DH, when she hasn't been keeping in touch, I get the feeling she might have been testing the waters, in addition to seeking advice. Temp check to see if she dump her loser or not.

 

[hopeful]

This may sound mean but I just want her to stop calling your dh and trying to cry on his shoulder. She's doing the most. She knows she needs to leave him but won't. She just wants somebody to complain to and make her feel better.

 

[cravoecanela]

She isn't going to leave him. (Guyanese) Indian women love white men. I'm not talking out of my butt, my fam is dougla.

Good luck to her in all of her endeavors.