What The Heck Is The Problem With Quiet Women

Livingmylifetothefullest

Livingmylifetothefullest

Well-Known Member
Ok, I know I'm not a guy and neither are you ladies but I must know: do men have a problem with quiet women? Have any of your guy friends make a comment about women that don't speak and/or are shy?

I just found out this guy at work likes me (but I wouldn't date him because I vowed to never date a coworker) but he says that I'm too quiet. Hello, if you freakin' talk to me, I will talk; I'm not one to run my mouth 24/7 but I can hold a damn conversation about pretty much anything.
 
Livingmylifetothefullest said:
Ok, I know I'm not a guy and neither are you ladies but I must know: do men have a problem with quiet women? Have any of your guy friends make a comment about women that don't speak and/or are shy?

I just found out this guy at work likes me (but I wouldn't date him because I vowed to never date a coworker) but he says that I'm too quiet. Hello, if you freakin' talk to me, I will talk; I'm not one to run my mouth 24/7 but I can hold a damn conversation about pretty much anything.
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No. Dude sounds like a jerk. I have quiet friends, cousins and sisters and they have yakitty yak SOs and husbands.


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I'm very quiet and before I got married I never had a problem with men not wanting to talk to me. Once a guy approached me and started a conversation I would talk, I wouldn't stay quiet.

Perhaps that's just his preference, he prefers a more talkative woman, but there is nothing wrong with a quiet woman, nothing at all--and I've yet to hear of a man having a problem with one, until your thread.
 
I think its because they think you're judging them.

I'm not quiet, but a lot of people think I'm quiet for some reason. People also swear I'm judging them, but I'm not. I think its related.
 
I've never really heard a guy or guys in general complain about quiet women. That said, I'm sure it rubs some guys the wrong way.
 
in addition to appearing stuck up and arrogant, i think a lot of quiet people come off as boring and uninteresting, including myself.
 
There is nothing wrong with being quiet. I tend to be quiet myself because I can be a little shy. But if you talk to me, especially about something interesting, the verbal flood gates will be open lol. I warm up really quickly.
 
No. I think non-quiet women may be his particular preference.

Girl, bump him. He probably don't like wedges either :lol:

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I'm quiet until I get to know someone too ... I think they mistake quietness for stuck-up-idness or whatever. OR they're total losers who want the woman to chase them and do all the work. I'm not the one. Be a man.
 
Im quiet and I get that often. Thy want a woman who is more aggressive. That way they have to do less work.

I am who I am. If his preference is non quiet women, mine is for men who can appreciate a quiet woman.

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Livingmylifetothefullest said:
Ok, I know I'm not a guy and neither are you ladies but I must know: do men have a problem with quiet women? Have any of your guy friends make a comment about women that don't speak and/or are shy?

I just found out this guy at work likes me (but I wouldn't date him because I vowed to never date a coworker) but he says that I'm too quiet. Hello, if you freakin' talk to me, I will talk; I'm not one to run my mouth 24/7 but I can hold a damn conversation about pretty much anything.
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I have a problem with the bolded. My advice is to always beware of 'men" who "like you but"...(insert downer here).
Don't even consider going into a situation where you've got to compromise or change your "core" behaviors, especially if there's nothing wrong with them. He's just lookin at you like a "fixer-upper", not a quality mate. Consider yourself warned and when-so-ever you encounter this type of "I like you but...." "KIM"

How's about you relay back that you like him but he has small hands. Hmmpf!
 
I'm quiet and I've never had a problem with men. Most claim to like my laid back/easy going personality. I'm only quiet in big groups or when I don't know people. If I'm one on one most think I'm interesting/have excellent convo/easy to talk to.

Ive always had the problem where a man's friends and/or family might not like me on first impression bc I am quiet so they think I'm rude or stuck up. That kind of irritates me. But thats just how it goes when you're an introvert living in an extrovert world. They don't understand that being loud and all up in my face feels just as rude and annoying to me as my quietness does to them.
 
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Ivonnovi said:
I have a problem with the bolded. My advice is to always beware of 'men" who "like you but"...(insert downer here).
Don't even consider going into a situation where you've got to compromise or change your "core" behaviors, especially if there's nothing wrong with them. He's just lookin at you like a "fixer-upper", not a quality mate. Consider yourself warned and when-so-ever you encounter this type of "I like you but...." "KIM"

How's about you relay back that you like him but he has small hands. Hmmpf!
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I absolutely concur with this. I dont mind compromising but when someone expects for you to become a totally different person for them, thats when its time to KIM. I used to tell my ex point blank, that I didn't always want to have a million people around/play host to all his get-togethers all the time. He kept insisting that I was being rude/must not like his friends. I just literally get burnt out around big groups of people all the time. Many times I did these things just to please him and somehow it still wasn't enough. That is just a part of my personality and if you can't accept it, oh well.
 
I love this thread!
I always worry that my quiet personality will hold me back in the dating scene. I'm just not talkative, and hope there are men out there that can appreciate that. I always hate when people say, You're soo quiet. Is that supposed to make me talk more? #Fail.

I also don't like when studies say that women talk more than men on average. I sure don't. :look:

I remember once complaining to my guy friend that none of the guys on campus are attracted to me because I never get approached. He told me he knew of several guys who were attracted to me, but never approached me because I don't talk a lot. :perplexed I was like, wtf? That makes no sense. He told me to just speak up more. I'm like, why can't they just approach me and talk to me if they want to get to know me? Lazy mofos, I tell ya. :lol:
 
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Livingmylifetothefullest said:
Ok, I know I'm not a guy and neither are you ladies but I must know: do men have a problem with quiet women? Have any of your guy friends make a comment about women that don't speak and/or are shy?

I just found out this guy at work likes me (but I wouldn't date him because I vowed to never date a coworker) but he says that I'm too quiet. Hello, if you freakin' talk to me, I will talk; I'm not one to run my mouth 24/7 but I can hold a damn conversation about pretty much anything.
Click to expand...

He sounds immature. Not an easy person to date.
 
MissMasala5 said:
I have quiet friends, cousins and sisters and they have yakitty yak SOs and husbands.
Click to expand...

OMGosh....I gotta feeling I'm going to get a husband who talks alot. :lachen:

Come to think of it, my ex-bfs talked alot......

I am a quiet person by nature, unless you are speaking to me, so I desire for the guy to approach me.

I really don't understand men's problem with speaking first. How hard is it to say HELLO HOW ARE YOU DOING? :lol:
 
Livingmylifetothefullest said:
Ok, I know I'm not a guy and neither are you ladies but I must know: do men have a problem with quiet women? Have any of your guy friends make a comment about women that don't speak and/or are shy?

I just found out this guy at work likes me (but I wouldn't date him because I vowed to never date a coworker) but he says that I'm too quiet. Hello, if you freakin' talk to me, I will talk; I'm not one to run my mouth 24/7 but I can hold a damn conversation about pretty much anything.
Click to expand...

I think its just an easy excuse not to pursue you. KIM

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I used to be quiet around people I didn't know and I was once told that I made people feel uncomfortable by my silence :-/

I'm naturally an introvert, but I've learned to play the game and chat about random nonsense.
 
I didn't think anyone would have a problem with a quiet person. If the person can't get you to communicate with them you're probably incompatible anyway.
 
That doesnt make sense. Im talkative and have always had very quiet SOs because well, I like to talk. lol.
Like someone said above, most quiet ppl have talkative mates.
 
There's nothing wrong with being quiet. I was very shy growing up and am pretty introverted to this day. Some guys are drawn to me because I'm quiet and come off as "sweet/innocent" (they admitted it).

However, I've also encountered guys who proclaimed they're into the more outgoing/social type.

There are a lot of positive labels that come from being quiet: conservative/classy, intelligent, sweet/innocent, deep thinker, mysterious, etc. but it's also easy to be judged as being boring, frigid, and generally not fun to be around.

Personally, I'm working on meeting new people and coming out of my shell more. When I go somewhere alone, I'll often force myself to smile and/or talk to at least one person for the sake of it. I've been meaning to do it for quite a while now, and it's actually easier than I thought it was.

Everyone has their "type" or ideal mate. I hate guys who are arrogant/rude when it comes to proclaiming what they do and don't like in a girl. Not all girls are going to be into them/their type anyway... it works both ways. ;)
 
I'm not quiet among my friends/family but I am among people I don't know and it's usually the first thing they notice. It's been this way for as long as I can remember and it still baffles me why people care so much.:perplexed I'm not one for talking about random nonsense. It's only caused problems with women though, which is probably why my HS experience wasn't a good one socially because it was all-girls and many students immediately thought I was a snob. It's never caused a problem with men though, who are surprised at the person they find when they take the time to get to know me because 'what you see is what you get' is sooooo NOT the case with me.:grin:
 
I dont know what his problem is...but my SO told me that he loves a woman that talks. He told me of dating women in the past that were too quiet and he wondered about them but he didnt necessarily hold that against them. He just prefers a talkative (as in lots of convo) woman and he definitely got it :grin:
 
MissMasala5 said:
No. Dude sounds like a jerk. I have quiet friends, cousins and sisters and they have yakitty yak SOs and husbands.QUOTE]

Now this is true. I'm know to be a quite person and my husband is a freakin motor mouth, he just needs to shut the **** up sometimes.
Click to expand...
 
I would have a problem with a quiet guy. I enjoy conversing and I prefer a man who has something to say and does not need to warm up to an environment.

I see nothing wrong with him not wanting a quiet woman. I honestly don't know anyone who is truly quiet. Everybody I now is outgoing on some level.
 
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I don't run off at the mouth with people I don't know or don't feel comfortable with. Never have never will.

I usually get the "Your so quiet" bit from some men that I date...but it's hard to change that when they never stop talking enough for me to open up to them. Especially when they are self absorbed and talk about themselves incessantly throughout the whole date. I can't change who I am nor do I want to.
 
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