What Sleeping With Married Men Taught Me About Infidelity

[PretteePlease]

If your man is not sexing you go get his testosterone checked. Low T is a real thing.
My friend had it he told me he just had no desire to do it. Once he started using
the testosterone cream he was back in action.

He is also an occasional cheater and dips out but he said when his T was low he wasn't
cheatin I love having guy friends it is very insightful.

 

[PretteePlease]

Dear readers of LHCF Green font =Anon


Anon says: I got married in my late twenties but I was with my husband 8 years prior to getting married so I was pretty inexperienced. I was with him for close to 20 years and (never?)had an orgasm so I became asexual. The lack of emotional intimacy and his length caused me to not be fully pleased. I got by doing it maybe once a month (this was during our mid-20s and early 30s).

It wasn’t until I experienced other partners that I realized what all the whoopla was about. I finally saw what people meant when they said sex is the spice of life. I could have it multiple times a day and not be satisfied wetting up mattresses and all (tmi). I had to seek the Lord in order to control my flesh lol (seriously)

So it could be the man and not you. I knew this when I got married but I was young and saw getting married as a life goal plus we were best friends.

 

[PeaceLover]

So I’m not going to lie, I’m low key paranoid about how pregnancy and motherhood will affect my sex life. I’ve always been the sex kitten type, very confident in my body and looks and I don’t know how I’ll handle the inevitable changes. And when you hear stories about how men lost complete interest in their wives while she was pregnant, it makes me nervous.

This makes me nervous, too.

DH’s attraction hasn’t changed since I got pregnant, but sex has changed for me. Like, I just don’t want it anymore. And I’m big...and tried...and turned off. I hope this feeling doesn’t continue after the baby. I don’t feel confident.

 

[BillsBackerz67]

DH’s attraction hasn’t changed since I got pregnant, but sex has changed for me. Like, I just don’t want it anymore. And I’m big...and tried...and turned off. I hope this feeling doesn’t continue after the baby. I don’t feel confident.

Idk I personally wouldn’t worry about this right now. Ur hormones are out of wack, ur huge, tired, there’s an oversized human in ur abdomen sucking the life out of you crushing all your vital organs , and ur cervix is literally about to fall out. Im pretty sure I wouldn’t want to do it either.
I think for the majority of pregnant women sex is enjoyable during the second trimester depending on the state of pregnancy obviously

 

[PeaceLover]

Idk I personally wouldn’t worry about this right now. Ur hormones are out of wack, ur huge, tired, there’s an oversized human in ur abdomen sucking the life out of you crushing all your vital organs , and ur cervix is literally about to fall out. Im pretty sure I wouldn’t want to do it either.
I think for the majority of pregnant women sex is enjoyable during the second trimester depending on the state of pregnancy obviously

This description is so accurate! I’m in my third trimester now & that’s when it went downhill. I’m hopeful that my libido will be normal again in a few months

 

[ChasingBliss]

Dear readers of LHCF Green font =Anon


Anon says: I got married in my late twenties but I was with my husband 8 years prior to getting married so I was pretty inexperienced. I was with him for close to 20 years and (never?)had an orgasm so I became asexual. The lack of emotional intimacy and his length caused me to not be fully pleased. I got by doing it maybe once a month (this was during our mid-20s and early 30s).

It wasn’t until I experienced other partners that I realized what all the whoopla was about. I finally saw what people meant when they said sex is the spice of life. I could have it multiple times a day and not be satisfied wetting up mattresses and all (tmi). I had to seek the Lord in order to control my flesh lol (seriously)

So it could be the man and not you. I knew this when I got married but I was young and saw getting married as a life goal plus we were best friends.

Yes the bolded in red is extremely important. When that isnt there, for ME....Im not there either. Things go downhill QUICK.

 

[Bad&Bougee]

I don't know why DH even bothers me with sex on Sunday. He knows I have a load in the wash with another one waiting behind it, a load in the dryer, I'm cooking, doing my hair, and trying to finish my class assignments. I mean, we can start something but as soon as one of those timers go off I have to get up. Why can't he just wait until Wednesday? Or Thursday?

 

[ChanelNo5]

I don't know why DH even bothers me with sex on Sunday. He knows I have a load in the wash with another one waiting behind it, a load in the dryer, I'm cooking, doing my hair, and trying to finish my class assignments. I mean, we can start something but as soon as one of those timers go off I have to get up. Why can't he just wait until Wednesday? Or Thursday?

The Sunday morning quickie is the best! Then it's pancakes and go on about your day.

 

[Bronxcutie]

This thread is scaring the hell out of me! I’m a 38 year-old single mom with one child. I’m also a teacher. My high sex drive has never waned no matter how much I’m dealing with, especially if I am in a committed, loving relationship. I am a wonderful man now who does not have children. I’m praying that if things work out that we do not have a sexless marriage. Physical and emotional intimacy is very important to us.

 

[jerseyhaircare]

@Bronxcutie: Most of the advice on this thread is a generalization, so it doesn't necessarily have to be your life. But it is true for some.

Sex is highly personal-if it means a lot to you and your health, you will find a way to make time for it. However, as long as you know that there are factors that may effect your desire along the way-extra responsibilities, aging, hormones, grieving, fights, weight gain, etc-you can make a plan and work through whatever obstacles are thrown at you.

My personal obstacles were weight gain and time management/fatigue. I'm happy to say despite having two kids, I have finally prioritized my health and I'm now down to a size four. I accomplished that with exercise and healthy eating, which in turn led to less fatigue. I feel better about myself, which has improved my self esteem and sex drive.

Now, my sex drive is definitely not what it was pre kids, but I chalk that up to still having little kids and both of us having hectic schedules. However, we are finding more time for each other since sex is important to us and things are getting better.

 

[jerseyhaircare]

Since I'm on a Michelle Wolfe kick I'm going to place her transcript from her HBO special 'Nice Lady.' I'm guessing, some of you ladies will be able to relate, I know I can:

"Women can have it all.” Yeah, stop saying that. You act like “all” is good. “ “All” is not good. And even if we do try to have it all, even if a woman out there definitely wants it all, we’ve put up too many obstacles in your way to make it possible.

It’s like, “Oh, congratulations, you’re having a baby? Great. Couple things… We’re gonna need you to get that car accident of a body back to work as soon as possible, because this is America and we don’t think you need time to recover. Also, you should breastfeed. It’s what’s best for the baby. But don’t do it in public, you pig. Do it in the old janitor’s closet underneath the bridge with the rest of the breastfeeding trolls.

And don’t ask to take time off from work when your kids are sick. We’ll think you’re not dedicated. Also, why are you such a bad mom? By the way, your salary is just enough to cover the cost of childcare.

And we know you’re exhausted and you don’t really know who you are anymore, and you’re trying to balance your old life and your new life, but, quick, go have sex with your husband! He’s about to leave! He doesn’t understand what you’re going through! Quick, go now! And sweetie, smile."