Thinking about throwing in the natural towel...

[HeavenlySkies]

Thinking about throwing in the natural towel...1 year later.

lol I know ok so here's my dilemma. It's been 22 months of being natural with my transition time included and I still have no hangtime (hair that hangs down) no matter what it's still an afro unless its wet even then still a semi lopsided afro. Ok so after a few setbacks I'm thinking I would have already been shoulder length but now I'm not. Soooooooooooo I just straightened the front of my hair partially only to find single-strand knots AGAIN. Last time I found them I just cut all my ends off. But the knots, lack of hangtime and styles in this awkward stage has me ready to perm this crap. Like the only thing I can do now is the puff with the elastic goody bands whatever I cant just wear my hair without anything containing it because it has like 4 textures some parts hang and are curly some are just frizz and like I said before it just doesn't hang down and now I'm not sure if it will ever do so. I was going to give this til the end of the year but I'm not sure if I will make it that long. I can add pictures to get an idea of my hair later. Sorry for the jumbled rant any ideas?

Pictures!!!
Can anyone tell me what my TEXTURE(s) is/are?

With KCCC

WET

NAPE

Brushed

Side wet

Side dry

Top

And lastly side part acting weird.

 

[Ms.Nishia]

I am natural also . I have had days when I wanted to save my hair off completely but, I was determined to remain natural . I have used braids and weaves to give myself a break from the knots and tangles as it grows out.

 

[HeavenlySkies]

Well I was thinking about shaving it off too lol But my thing is how long is it really going to take to get hangtime? What messed me up was looking at all these other people big chopping in every texture and having a certain length after a year. Then when I do it it's like the opposite of all I've seen like really? Is this what's happening in the streets? lol Blah.

​

 

[discodumpling]

Awwwwww ((huggs)) STOP comparig your hair to everyone elses. I've found that even with my current & ongoing setback (post natal shedding) my hair is still in great condition. From viewing other FOTKI's I would say that you 3rd yr natural is a pivitol point in your HHJ.

Stick with it. Single strand knots happen but they seem to lessen with growth...& hang time is different for everybody! Enjoy YOUR hair.

 

[HeavenlySkies]

Awwwwww ((huggs)) STOP comparig your hair to everyone elses. I've found that even with my current & ongoing setback (post natal shedding) my hair is still in great condition. From viewing other FOTKI's I would say that you 3rd yr natural is a pivitol point in your HHJ.

Stick with it. Single strand knots happen but they seem to lessen with growth...& hang time is different for everybody! Enjoy YOUR hair.

Thanks. I know looser textured chicks have it easier as far as growth/being able to retain and their hair holds moisture better etc etc I mentioned the whole thing about the different textures because I saw people with my texture grow just fine and you know do their thing also so it's like a big wtf.

​

 

[Beaute Noire]

Hang in there my dear

Your hair looks beautiful in every picture!

 

[virtuenow]

I also went through a weird stage where my hair wasn't short anymore-- but it also wasn't long (at an "in-between phase"). It was too akward to wear "out" b/c no hang time. And too big to wear out b/c--well-- too big! So I put it in micros until I was ready. From looking at ur pics, your gonna really enjoy your hair once you get some length on it. It looks like 3d-4b-- but have you started doing blow outs and twist outs yet? If you still don't like it try braids for a while

 

[Sade']

Your hair is SOOOO dag on pretty!!!! I love the texture. Don't give in... just try a weave for a little while. Give your hair a break.

 

[melissa-bee]

Your hair looks nice. Sorry i have no advice. I would just stick it out. Are the single strand nots caused because you always wear your hair kinky. Why don't you blow dry it, so it's stretched.

 

[peachykeen]

I have no suggestions, but your hair texture is really pretty.

 

[so1913]

Please hang in there and be patient because you have some absolutely BEAUTIFUL natural hair!!!!

The single strand knots come with the territory, you can switch up by wearing less loose styles and just make sure your ends stay well conditioned. Even with the knots, keeping them healthy and strong will keep them from snapping off. Also, continue to trim them on your own using the search & destroy methodas they pop up if you don't have stylist you can trust not to hack off inches everytime you trim.

You just have to get over the hump...you can do it!

 

[Ms.Christ3n]

Don't relax , pweeze? Your hair texture looks really pretty. Maybe you can try some Knot Today? I haven't used it, but I heard it's really good.

 

[mrsjohnson75]

I just want to say that your hair is GORGEOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Try a twistout or braidout on blown out hair.

 

[huxtable]

OP you have great hair.

At the end of the day you must do what is best for you.

If it were me though I would not give up. Just view this as part of the journey. I guess you are still learning about your textures. I am guessing you will find there will be lessons to learn at each stage (i.e. the weight of you hair as it grows some more may bring more changes).

At the moment I have a twa with VERY VERY tight curls i.e when I look at shed hairs they look like "o" but when I stretch them there is about 4" of hair (my shrinkage is no joke). I am fully aware I may look like ham to some observers but my eye is on the prize.

(Sorry for long post but I guess this is what happens when you finally come out of lurkdom)

 

[tada1]

you've come this far. why throw in the towel because of knots? and hang time?
hang time will come in due time so enjoy your hair at it's current length. I am a 4b all over (with some 4a at my nape) and my hair is in that in between stage. I tried wearing it out for a couple of days but quickly realized that I was going to go mad if i didn't stop messing with it. so i have DIY kinkies in right now.

take a break from your hair if you must, but don't do anything drastic because of knots. Now to answer your question
you look like a mix of type 3 (at the back) and type 4 in front. the effect is that the top of your head will "stand" while the back will tend to hang/flop backwards.
as far as advice for what to do, i think you should look at what other naturals with similar frustrations have done. One of my favorites is Mandy on this board, she was ready to chop off her hair about a year ago but she stuck it out and her hair is now to die for.
have you considered blow drying your hair on cool after washing to cut down on knots?
have you considered twists or braids with or without extensions?


hang in there hun

 

[JinaRicci]

Your hair is very pretty! Have you tried wash n gos with kccc? Or do you have a denman? I find that those two things help a lot to blend the different textures.

I hope you hang in there because you're almost at your 2 year anniversary & awkward stages come even when you're relaxed. But ultimately do what's best for you.

 

[Miss AJ]

Well I was thinking about shaving it off too lol But my thing is how long is it really going to take to get hangtime? What messed me up was looking at all these other people big chopping in every texture and having a certain length after a year. Then when I do it it's like the opposite of all I've seen like really? Is this what's happening in the streets? lol Blah.​

Every head of hair is unique, so comparing yours to someone else's is only going to frustrate you even more. My hair was a little past full SL before my wash and go did any hanging and even then I still wasn't satisfied. My normal growth rate is 1/2 inch per month and with growth aids it gets bumped up to a full inch. It may seem like others are getting more hair in a shorter amount of time but if your growth rate is slower and if you aren't retaining the growth you do get then it may seem like your hair isn't doing much.

 

[LadyPBC]

Your hair is B-U-T full I, by no means am an expert. I'm a natural newbie (1 year next month) but when I wanted to throw in the towel and started investigating texturizers I started including yogurt in my regime. It loosened my coils and my hair is much more manageble and has hang. I usually include greek full fat yogurt with honey in my pre poo and it does wonders. I love it.

 

[Taina]

OPP im in the same boat as you are. I love my curls and i just have 7 months post BC but i want to have myhair straight but i dont want to miss my fro, i dont know what to do :/

 

[anon123]

Except for the hair in the back, your hair does not seem to be the type that will hang in its shrunken state. That's perfectly normal, there is nothing inherently wrong with that. If you want your hair to hang more, I'd recommend trying some twists or twist outs.

 

[southerncitygirl]

komaza care makes a califa hair pudding and a coconut one buy samples of both, call them to find out what products may work for your hair type....don't give up there's a looong learning curve with natural hair cause every head of hair is so unique.

 

[DigitalRain]

What?? I will fight you if you perm that beautiful hair Just j/k. But really I feel your pain. But since you have a nice length, how about getting your hair flat ironed for a while?

 

[lamaria211]

your hair looks better than mine! u better keep it up or eles who are us real newbies gonna look up to. hth your hair is beautiful all textures

 

[Nonie]

:scratchch If "hangtime" is important to you and your staying natural is dependent on your hair doing what Billsbackerz or So1913 or Nikstar's hair does, then I'ma be honest with you and tell you that I doubt that will happen. Your hair seems to behave like my hair where it contracts. As I stated once before, and I see Discodumpling saying the same thing, until you stop comparing your hair to someone else's and see it in its own uniqueness and appreciate it for what it is, you will never really be happy with it or even get to know what it truly likes. You will spend all your time trying to get it to do what's not natural to it, and miss all the fun you could have had letting it show you what it can do.

As others have said, your hair is beautiful. But if "hangtime" is important, then I'ma tell you that you may have to texlax. I think your hair is beautiful and wish you would see what we see, but you need to be happy so do what you need to do to be happy.

BTW, MsCocoface has hair that is probably BSL but have you seen it shrunken? I see your hair doing what hers does, hence my honest opinion that "hangtime" just may not be on your cards.

 

[afrikurl]

I think the back is 3c, maybe the side too, the rest looks 4a 4b. Natural, tightly coiled hair doesn't necessarily hang. It looks like and afro because it is an afro. You can give your afro some definition by using styling aids (like KCCC which you already have) or by styling it differently. If I twist my hair on dry stretched hair, it seems to hang. I'm APL and it still stands up. To keep the SSKs at bay I would try to keep your hair stretched and put away.Try twisted updos or braids for a while. Be gentle on your edges and try not to pull it back too tight or too often.

OP your hair is gorgeous and full and it looks uber healthy. Keep taking good care of it.

 

[Kurlee]

you look like a mix of 3c/4a and your hair is absolutely gorgeous. Give your hair some time. You are in the awkward stage that every natural goes through. It will get better

 

[Iluvsmuhgrass]

Moustacy your hair is gorgeous. Actually gorgeous is an understatement. You have so many different textures going on and it's just so doggone beautiful!

When I was transitioning, I saw coils bunched up and I got excited. When I BC'ed my hair went WHOOOOOOOOOMMMMM and it seems like my coils only come out now when I use certain products or butt loads of gel. I've embraced that the back is curly/coily. I've embraced that my curl patterns are odd.... some coils, some waves, and some weird 3cish curl/wave/hump mix on a smaller scale. I've embraced that the sides are frizzy. I've embraced that it's weird as hell because even though I'm 4a/b my hair tends to straighten out on the ends when wet/damp/well moisturized (not heat damage because I haven't been into heat at all) but will "fro up" with the rest of my hair when dry. I will never have hang time.... ever. That's just how my hair is made. It'll touch the sky before it'll touch my shoulders.... and I'm ok with that. Truthfully it kinda makes me happy lol.

I think you should change up some styling options so you won't worry about it as much. Blow it out and do a braid out, lightly straighten and do a bantu knot out, flat twists with a pony, etc. I'd hate to see you relax or chop again because it's soooooo pretty.... but I want you to be happy too. Do what you feel is best.

 

[Lynnerie]

Hi Moustacy,

I know how you feel as I'm right around the same time frame as you 23 months including my transition. (15 months all natural) My hair is also in the in-between stage. The hair is at a weird length and even though you could get it cut to shape it you can stick it out by wearing some twists or just rocking your puff.

Also, you look like you have thick hair like myself- you probably should work on how you apply your products. A lot of times we avoid the middle part of the hair when styling and I think you will have better results with your KCCC if you work on technique. Have you tried shingling with your products? That might give you the look you desire.

You could go the relaxing/texturizing/silkening route but before you go there I suggest giving it some time to get over the hump. Then if you decide to use a chemical then thats fine too cause you will have given it lots of thought and you"ll have more length. I say this because if your hair is shoulder-length straightened- once you relax it will still be that length and then you'll have to wear it up all the time anyway to try and get it over that stage.

 

[shinyblackhair]

I feel you girl, you got more hang time than me. I've all kinds of crazy textures: loose and wavy in the front -def hang-able, lol. Then in the back loose and wavy - like 3c ish...hangable actually it almost touches my neck at 5 months post bc with NO transition...however...the crown area which makes up the majority of the THICKNESS of my hair is this shrunken thick jungle-y jungle...the reason why transitioning was not an option for me when relaxed, the breakage at the demarcation right in the crown was insane.

I realize this section of hair will never "hang"...not gonna happen. This section is straight-up afro 4B hair. It will grow *out*, but it will not grow *down*, lol. So....now I'm just debating as whether this is something I can handle. It is sooo dry and thick and really hard to get through - except when wet and full and conditioner, but I digress...

I agree with others who said that if hangtime is what's important (and to me there's nothing wrong with that) you may never truly be happy with your natural hair. I'm going through the same thing and I'm only 5 mos post bc.

 

[MyAngelEyez~C~U]

Don't you dare relax your hair! It's beautiful, and you've come too far to give up now. Try different STRETCHED styles (braids, twists, or even flat iron) to help avoid or minimize knots. Since I'm a BKTer, I'd even say try doing one, since quite a few of our natural BKTers report that SSKs have been alleviated with use of BKTs.

Whatever you do, don't give up. Believe me, transitioners like me wish we had your puff already