Usually I agree with your points but you lost me here. Just because we wore our hair short in history does not mean that's how our hair is supposed to be.
So why do you think various cultures almost unanimously reached the same conclusion? That keeping it braided or tied up most of the time, or otherwise kept short, was the way to go? Chance?
My question to you is, if your hair was "meant" to be anything else, why is it so hard? Why do you search for an answer for years only to not find it? That right there should tell you that that is not how it's meant to be.
It takes little skill to cut hair in a short cropped afro, especially if it's short. And it certainly takes less skill than all the other things we try to force our hair to do, no?But anyway, if our hair was meant to be braided, kept short, blah blah blah...why does it have to take so much energy to do any of those things. Braiding hair requires a skill that most people aren't born with. Keeping it short means continuously cutting it and if you want it to be neat, you need someone who knows how to cut hair. And anyway why would God give us hair just to tell us to cut it? Makes no sense. That's like saying as women, we are SUPPOSED to shave the hair on our legs or something. I'm sure keeping dreads neat and clean is something that requires skill as well. There is nothing "natural" about anything that you mentioned we must do. It's all something else we invented or decided to do to our hair and in my opinion, it's no different than the OPs frustration at not being able to style her hair the way she wants to.
As opposed to women of almost any other race where they can wash their hair and airdry it and not experience breakage or wash it and put it in a ponytail without needing a bunch of gels, moisturizers, etc. Or just wash it and BE, we don't have that luxury. We have to braid, or cut, or blow it out like you suggested. Just face it, for most of us, our hair is extremely difficult AND frustrating.
Also, you can wash your hair and let it be, too. If it's short or locked. Though if it's locked, you might not want to wash it daily, it takes so long to dry.
I know what you're saying, because I've been frustrated, too. You can search and find rants about my hair from me on this very board. But what I am telling you to face is that the reason your hair is difficult is because you are asking it to do things it wasn't meant to do. Maybe I want to be 5'7". I'm mad because some girls can see parades without having to stand on something and I'm short. Does that mean something is wrong with my body? No. Maybe someone wishes their toes were shaped differently, or their knees looked like whatever, butt looked like whatever, and so forth. But them wishing they had something that looked like someone else's doesn't mean anything is wrong with their body. Just because you want a part of you to do something or be like something else doesn't mean there's anything wrong! All it means is you want something you don't have.
@judy4all when I say braiding isn't "natural" I don't mean it in the way you are thinking...I simply mean that it's something that requires skill or at least the ability to know how to do. No other race has to possess a "skill" in order to do their hair. That's what all I mean when I say it's not natural. BTW, I see nothing wrong with braiding hair or anything.
Um, all people need skill to know how to fix their hair in the style that is deemed acceptable by their group. Ever hear of non-black people say they got "a bad haircut"? How so, if it required no skill and anyone could do it? Why didn't they do it themselves? The braids I have in right now are the type I learned to do on My Little Pony when I was in elementary school. Minimal skill. The only difference is, we live in a society that might be hostile to the types of styles that are most reasonable for our type of hair. Again, this is not a problem with our hair, this is a problem with people's mindsets.
Let me tell you, an Indonesian guy I know wanted to get cornrows. He thought they were so cool. He kept his in for 4 or 5 days, which is more than I expected! He's probably wondering why he'd have to get his redone every 4-5 days while black people can keep theirs in for a month. Mindset.
Why is it only black people who think they can't wash their hair, but mixed people with the same exact hair type don't think twice before doing it?
I'm not sure what hair type you are talking about, but the only way I can wash my hair daily is if it is short (less than a few inches) or I have dreadlocks. Otherwise, my hair will mat up and try to form dreadlocks anyway. Combing hair out daily in an effort to prevent the matting will break the hair off, and it takes too much time. I know this because I've tried it. Like OP, I was frustrated with my hair and tried SO MANY things. Seriously, there is nothing new anyone on this board can tell me to try. I've been on hair boards for 4 1/2 years now and heard and tried it all.