SPINOFF from: If a guy doesn't approach you or ask you out, there's a good reason!

[Makenzie]

I chillin this evening reading through older posts and came across this one - If a guy doesn't approach you or ask you out, there's a good reason! Great words of wisdom ladies!!!!

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=231489

I got up to page eight and started wondering if I am not gonna chase the guy, be the aggressor, put myself out there, take the lead etc... what the heck do I do to show interest? I'm kinda shy myself and always let the guy take the lead. But in the back of my mind I guess I kinda envy the woman who goes after what (who) she wants. There is a guy I've been checking out from a distance and I have no clue what he thinks of me. I'm single and pretty content for the time being, but what do I do if I happen to meet a man that makes me go ummmmmmmm?

Help me out ladies. How do you let a man know you are interested without approaching him?

 

[naturalmanenyc]

Re: SPINOFF from: If a guy doesn't approach you or ask you out, there's a good reason

I have no idea other than approaching him first.

DH & I were just talking about this over dinner since he keeps getting approached. I swear it's the wedding ring.

I didn't approach DH first but I did ask about him to a gossipy mailroom guy at the office (we met at work).

Prior to DH, I approached a few men first. After breaking the ice (asking what they were drinking or something), I let them take the lead.

 

[Ramya]

Re: SPINOFF from: If a guy doesn't approach you or ask you out, there's a good reason

Just strike up casual conversation. Just being friendly is usually enough. If he's interested he'll ask you out or ask for your telephone number.

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

Re: SPINOFF from: If a guy doesn't approach you or ask you out, there's a good reason

In my most humble opinion, you should just be yourself. Walk over to him and introduce yourself. You're not trying to audition for the starring role of baby momma, etc or wife-to-be. You just want to get to know him. Like I said, introduce yourself, have small talk..you know, kinda feel him out. If you're not getting the vibe (listen to your inner instincts..they neva lie), then keep it moving. Then you can say to yourself, at least I tried, and you can give yourself an "E" for effort. If you get the feeling he's not showing any interest, don't take it personal because he doesn't know you well enough to reject you... he's just not interested.

However, on the flip side, sometimes as women, when we pursue these men, some are intimidated, and do not know how to respond when we approach them. Then, some men like aggressive women, who know what they want and go after it. The decision is yours.

But always remember, when a man approaches you (in a decent respectable manner, cuz some of these bamas don't know nuffin bout manners), the ball is in your court. It's all about the art of pursuit...the Chase. Good luck!

 

[stinastina]

Re: SPINOFF from: If a guy doesn't approach you or ask you out, there's a good reason

There was audio book I downloaded a while back by Leil Lowndes (How to Make Anyone Fall in Love With You). Now I have no idea what her credentials are but I tried a few things she suggested on SO and they worked very well to get him back after a break up a couple of years ago.

Anyways, she said there are ways to approach a man and make it look like it was his idea. You start by smiling at him. Sometimes that's all they need to come talk to you. I wish I remember more about first meeting someone but it's been a while. Her book is like 93 cents on amazon or you could probably download it free on limewire if it sounds interesting. I'm sorry I can't remember more - maybe someone else on the board has read it.

 

[bermudabeauty]

Re: SPINOFF from: If a guy doesn't approach you or ask you out, there's a good reason

If it were me I would let him know I found him attractive, I like the way he carried himself and would like to get to know him better. The only thing he can do is say no. I'm sure you know your a cutie. How could he possibly say no.