Single Christian Women's Support - THE REMIX!

mz.rae said:
Does anyone feel like if you find more things that annoy you about a person, than things you like about them that it's probably time to just move on?
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YES!!! I feel this way in all things. If I can't find more good than bad, then it's time to move along. Unless the Lord tells me to be still.
 
mz.rae said:
There's nothing more insulting than a man who thinks they know so much about you. When all he is doing is making a bunch of assumptions that you are telling him are wrong. Get to know me and listen to what I am telling you.
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I have no tolerance for this. I overheard a man say that because a women does her own hair (she's natural) that means she can't afford to get her hair done or she's cheap. I was thinking "Does he know the history between us, our hair, and stylist? Does he know how much our products cost? We are far from cheap." I was so upset and he wasn't even talking to me.
When I'm asked what do I look for in a man, the first thing I say is "a man that does not assume things about me." Then I go into detail about how I don't tolerate it, and men have lost their chances with me because of it. If he really cares, he will remember what I said.
 
Hi, happy Sunday and Sabbath for some of us! I know many of us aren't married yet but I've decided that I'm going to start preparing to be a wife. That's the end goal right? I think I'm so worried about being a girlfriend when it's not really what the purpose of all this is. Yesterday I visited a parish gift shop with the sole purpose of purchasing a book of prayers and a book on St. Joseph. I saw a couple of books on being a Christian husband, wife , parent etc. and kept putting it out of my mind. But now that I reflect , me seeing those books out of the corner of my eye every two seconds (or so it seemed lol) was not by chance. So I'm going back tomorrow and peruse. Hopefully I make it in time for mass as well. I know definitely that the type of wife I want to be is a good, Christian wife. So I'm going to start preparing now.
 
LiftedUp said:
Hi, happy Sunday and Sabbath for some of us! I know many of us aren't married yet but I've decided that I'm going to start preparing to be a wife. That's the end goal right? I think I'm so worried about being a girlfriend when it's not really what the purpose of all this is. Yesterday I visited a parish gift shop with the sole purpose of purchasing a book of prayers and a book on St. Joseph. I saw a couple of books on being a Christian husband, wife , parent etc. and kept putting it out of my mind. But now that I reflect , me seeing those books out of the corner of my eye every two seconds (or so it seemed lol) was not by chance. So I'm going back tomorrow and peruse. Hopefully I make it in time for mass as well. I know definitely that the type of wife I want to be is a good, Christian wife. So I'm going to start preparing now.
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I agree with you. Becoming a wife starts before one marries and maybe before you even meet the guy! My prayer these days is to become the woman I need to be for my future spouse. Women were created as a helpmeet so there are probably specific characteristics he needs. The Lord can teach you about your man. Also that Proverbs 31 women did good to her husband all the days of her life. Since I assume she didn't know him from the moment of her birth, I think we can assume that means she had the character of a wife before she met him.
 
I went looking for resources and couldn't find what I wanted. The material I found focused on being a good Christian mother but not wife specifically. Plan B is to source some online resources. I also want a good Christian husband of course who can provide in the type of way God would want him to. I want him to provide in his capacity as head the household. I want him to lead.
 
tlbaby23 said:
I'm always wondering what God will do in my life relationship wise. Have I met my future husband already or have i yet to meet him? When will I meet him if I havent already, how will I meet him? So many questions! Lol and please tell me im not the only one!

Its very hard for me because as a nursing student i dont go out, I always have my head in the books. Then when I do want to go out, I dont have many friends. During the summer I was questioning the loyalty of my friends and prayed to God about it and before I knew it, he removed so many people out of my life. So theres that frustration of when I am able to go out and meet different guys, im not going to go alone so I end up staying home.

As much as i try my best to be patient and let God work, there are those moments where you wonder: where, when, and how Lord so I can be prepared and look my best! Lol. Im going to try my best to stay positive, keep my mind focus on God, and eventually everything will fall in place. God does speak to me and he keeps telling me to be patient and focus on school so I know his Will for me at the moment. I also have a male friend that has the gift of prophecy (he is the real deal, ive tested him lol) and he said it will be a year from now :ohwell: seems so far away, but if thats God will, then I will obey. Pray for me ladies! :yep:
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If this guy has the gift of prophesy that's great but don't get wrapped up in what he's said KIM always test the prophets.
You're not alone curiousity can really do a number on us if we let it.
Your first priority is getting through shool graduating and starting your career.
Also don't forget the spiritual, take time to pray read the word and spend time with God as much as you can so it will be easy to ask Him about whoever comes along and you'll be able to docent His voice.
HTH
 
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sounbeweavable said:
It's crazy how the devil will use your friends against you. One of my friends from church was being really insensitive and giving me bad, unwise advice today that really upset me and pissed me off. I talked to three separate women with very mature faiths and they made me see that I was right to feel off about that advice because it wasn't healthy and was the devil feeding me lies. I wasn't very nice in my reaction and I apologized, but I know I can't really go to this person for insight anymore because she doesn't have the wisdom or maturity to provide meaningful, godly advice.

It's rough out there for young Christian women. *shudders*
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I hear you I got some really bad unsolicited advice they basically suggested I just have a kid out of wed lock and don't even try to get married or wait for my God appointed husband basically just give up.
Wow the devil is a liar and working overtime to get us to settle
Keep your head up and Jesus in all areas of your life.
 
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Kinkyhairlady said:
How does God play into helping us meet our mates? Do you think he orchestrates the chance meetings? I'm so confused on this. Sometimes I think God helps future mates cross paths or uses a mutual party to introduce them but other times I think does God have time to play Cupid? There is so much more going on in the world does he have time to hear the hearts of those wanting a mate to spend their lives with. Sometimes I reflect on my life trying to think did I ever meet someone who could have been a great husband? If so why didn't God help me instead of me screwing things up on my own. I'm just confused and hurt. I really don't get why I'm in my 30s and still not married.
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@Kinkyhairlady

Jesus said many times in the bible be not afraid. He also said I am with you.
Try not to beat yourself up over it so much that's the enemy taking advantage of your frustration and amplifying it to confuse and hurt you.

When you have these thoughts rebuke them in Jesus name and think of all the positive points:

God knew these guys better than you he knows if they would be good for you or not and when. Sometimes people have met their husband but the timing wasn't right maybe he or she needs to learn some valuable lesson maybe they were being disobedient and God is waiting on them to stop rebelling and get with the program.

Whatever God has planned for you the way in which He will bring things about you may only know some of it in hindsight after he brings you and your future hubby together. Don't obsess about the who, how, and why pray for him that he grows spiritually career wise knowledge etc. if you're a list person, make your list based on not only the physical but godly traits.
I posted something a couple pages back I think. How God will work things to your good is not for you or me to know.

ETA:
God has a story a plan for you, sometimes we get a feeling or vision about it but everyone may not Be given a vision.
Also we need to stop trying to forcibly write our own story because we got enamored with a story that we read or heard or saw on Tv or a movie. Yes we have free will to choose but choosing without God is folly.

Maybe the story got to you because it's beatiful story that may or may not be the story God has planned for you.
Ex: Like you meet some kid in HS and you date in college and get married right after graduation. It might be your story, but it might not cause That story isn't for everyone. Again I don't know what He has for you but I know it's great cause He is God who created the universe nothing is to gray or too small for Him.

Just because that movie plot romance didn't happen it doesn't mean God doesn't have some godly handsome man and romantic story waiting for you, no one knows if it's Gods will and you pray on it maybe He will give you a glimpse but again it's according to His will not yours.
Pray for strengthened faith, patience and when someone shows up pray on it and wait for that confirmation He will let you know and have a Christ centered relationship put Jesus as the head of that courtship and He won't steer you wrong.

There's some Heather Linsday posts above tread check those out.


Isaiah 55:8-12

For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
10 As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purposefor which I sent it.
12 You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.

Jeremiah 29:11

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Also check out various posts in this thread on pages 20-22









 

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Some times I look at other people's relationships and how happy they are and I have to fight the urge to cry. I wonder why am I not as happy as they are in their relationships? Why do I always get the short end of the stick in relationships? I look and see all these women glowing about all the things their SO does for them, and here I am in a relationship where I feel like I am the man. I know looks can be deceiving, and that glitters isn't always gold. That I truly have no idea what is really going down in those relationships, but I just wish for only a portion of what they are feeling. This is the first relationship where I just feel indifferent. The first relationship where I honestly could care less about being around the person. I mean I don't even want to go to church with them anymore! Because I'm tired of having to pick them and drive them around. And now I am at a point where I don't even care that they don't have a car to get to church anymore because I feel my sanity is more important. They're older than me I'm sure they can find a way.

The fact that they just started working a new job doesn't phase me. I just feel like it's too little too late, and I really don't feel like it's going to make much of a difference anyway. My friend just wasn't getting it when I said that I feel I deserve better, and feels like he isn't a bad guy while adding that they couldn't get be in a relationship with him which to me cancels out what they said. I mean he is a nice person, with a cheerful personality. But I feel a lot of people can be nice and mean well, they just get into relationships and are LAZY or shouldn't have gotten into a relationship during the season they are in, in the first place. Because they are going to be nothing but a burden and end up dragging the other person down with them.
 
mz.rae said:
Some times I look at other people's relationships and how happy they are and I have to fight the urge to cry. I wonder why am I not as happy as they are in their relationships? Why do I always get the short end of the stick in relationships? I look and see all these women glowing about all the things their SO does for them, and here I am in a relationship where I feel like I am the man. I know looks can be deceiving, and that glitters isn't always gold. That I truly have no idea what is really going down in those relationships, but I just wish for only a portion of what they are feeling. This is the first relationship where I just feel indifferent. The first relationship where I honestly could care less about being around the person. I mean I don't even want to go to church with them anymore! Because I'm tired of having to pick them and drive them around. And now I am at a point where I don't even care that they don't have a car to get to church anymore because I feel my sanity is more important. They're older than me I'm sure they can find a way.

The fact that they just started working a new job doesn't phase me. I just feel like it's too little too late, and I really don't feel like it's going to make much of a difference anyway. My friend just wasn't getting it when I said that I feel I deserve better, and feels like he isn't a bad guy while adding that they couldn't get be in a relationship with him which to me cancels out what they said. I mean he is a nice person, with a cheerful personality. But I feel a lot of people can be nice and mean well, they just get into relationships and are LAZY or shouldn't have gotten into a relationship during the season they are in, in the first place. Because they are going to be nothing but a burden and end up dragging the other person down with them.
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Well only you can make that decision but think on it and pray on it. If you've done all this and offered it up to God He will lead you to the correct path and decision.
 
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Belle Du Jour said:
Did you feel a difference from before? I feel like, I thought I was ready 6, 12, 36 months ago but NOW I feel really ready. It feels different but I don't know how to describe it?
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Sorry I didnt see this earlier :rolleyes: I must have scrolled past.
I know what you mean when I was right out of school I knew I wasn't ready by any stretch of the imagination.

Then I thought I was kind of ready before but now there's a calmness in my excitement and anticipation of good blessings coming my way. Before I was always worried and anxious mostly wondering how things would come about now I'm letting Jesus take the wheel :lol:
 
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Lucia said:
Sorry I didnt see this earlier :rolleyes: I must have scrolled past.
I know what you mean when I was right out of school I knew I wasn't ready by any stretch of the imagination.

Then I thought I was kind of ready before but now there's a calmness in my excitement and anticipation of good blessings coming my way. Before I was always worried and anxious mostly wondering how things would come about now I'm letting Jesus take the wheel :lol:
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THIS. All of this. I think I finally know what contentment in this season means. I have it. Jesus is really my true Love. He comes first. I now understand what that means. And my trust has gone to a deeper level...I can't explain it. Even if I never marry I know He will supply everything I need. At the same time, I feel something coming in a big way.
 
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