Shrinkage,Tangles, & Knots come with the Nappy Territory...More Harm than Good???

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

I did the unmentionalble the other day and threw some relaxer on it.

Unfortunately my hair wasnt having any of it and I am now still typing with a shrunken fro avec fluffier


I had braids in for a month but when I took it out I was faced with the tangles and knots/poofiness and I couldnt take that ish any more and Im not even at your length yet.


I hate the feeling about having to explain myself If I just feel like cheating once in a while. Sometimes I catch a bus when I could have walked, sometimes I get a take-out when I have perfectly good food in the fridge. Sometimes u just cant be bothered.

I am on my way to buying my first pressing comb right now

I'm having those thoughts as I type.

 

[Priss Pot]

I can't stand ripping through my hair when trying to remove knots. Just the sound of my hair tearing makes me feel uneasy, but it has to be done.

I know how you feel Poohbear.

 

[Priss Pot]

Double Post

 

[~*~ShopAholic~*~]

I'm a little shocked, I would have never thought you would have typed the OP, but that's neither here nor there, I say do what is best for you and your hair. So if that's pressing every now and then go for it, and I think that DCing regularly will show a big difference in no time. Plus who wants a head of hair weather pressed, natural, relaxed, locked and etc. that they can't enjoy and be happy with, I know I don't and don't know too many pple that do.

For those frizzy ends, they should get better with DCing and won't frizz up too much or not at all once it gets a good amount of moisture. Also the pressing combs with the teeth in the back are good getting those ends.

 

[ToyToy]

Hi Poohbear!
I completely understand where you are coming from!!! I have splits, knots and tangles constantly, and they don't seem to want to go away no matter how much I trim. I never saw a split end when I was relaxed even though I bleached and coloured my hair!! I didn't even know what they looked like until I went natural. I do love my hair (really!), and I plan to stay natural, but I never knew how high maintenance this will be!

Do what you feel is right for your hair! If you want to straighten, do so! It's your hair!

 

[Rain20]

If you do press your hair try using the Mizani Thermasmooth system. Also if u haven't already, look at Beauty Witch's fotki (BHM). She has a nice hair style with small braids not completed braided that she can wear for at least a week. The ends curl and look really nice. It might add a different style for you. I think Turner girl also used the technique as well. HTH. Good luck.

 

[Hair Iam]

So i have always disagreed with the statement that straighten natural hair is not natural...theres no chemicals in it,

I totally agree, Suggeastons are always welcome ..but we have the final say.. what ever makes our hair health, attractive and its best is where I'll be. So flat iron , color, curly , straight, puffy, its good ...on ward march! ..And as a man once said" I pitty the fool " who dosen't think so.

 

[StrawberryQueen]

Pooh, I feel you. I have the knots, tangles-all of it. I snap them off (bad) or try to comb them out in the shower.

I just recently found a good conditioning mix which makes my once a week detangling (more than that and my hair gets dry strangely enough) easier. I co wash everyday though, but I don't detangle.

My solution is to relax, which I plan on doing sometime soon. I miss my long hair and I never had a detangling issue or as much breakage as I do now as I did when I was relaxed.

 

[Afrikaisi]

I am currently transitioning. Reading the posts on here...well they aren't making me change my mind, but they are making me think...I wonder what our ancestors did with their hair or did they even care? (Seriously)

Anyway I am not sure if I am just going to loc it up or what. I do think that stretching it once in a while will help you retain length you want, also keeping it mositurized and locking that mositure in there will help too.

That is why I am considering locking it up, I figure it will be stretched. But then again I am like it is too permanent, but then I think you can still have a multitude of styles with locs, then, well I don't know what to think.

One thing I am sure of is that I am going natural!

I hope everything works out for you whatever you eventually decide to do.

 

[Integrity]

I love love love Tresemme conditioners, especially the moisture rich and salon silk! They keep my natural hair soooooo soft!!!!!! I only wash once a week and only comb through after I wash in sections and when my hair is absolutely loaded with Tresseme. It has worked wonders so far. I am so happy. BUT i am still considering relaxing later this year to reduce the thickness a bit. I am happy I found Tresemme to help with detangling but I will have to use it everyday to keep the hair soft as it dries out again mid week but i dot have the time to wash more than once a week!

 

[Guapa1]

Why is your hair still fluffy when you put relaxer on it?

I can understand the frustration, we all have it. I just don't get the guilt? The hair is on your head (I'm not talking about you specifically AutumnLuv, just using your post as an example) and you can do what you want with it.


A few months back I was fed up with waiting for my hair to dry and wanted to twist it the same day instead of airdrying overnight. So I decided to blow dry it. By the time I parted it into small sections, added the heat protectant and blew it out section by section. By the end, I had small little bits of hair on the floor, my hair felt rough and my scalp was so tender from the heat I couldn't touch it until the next day so FOR ME I might as well airdry.

My friend blows her hair out with no problem, her hair is healthy and she's happy.

I have another friend who presses her hair and wear microbraids that she doesn't wash for 2 months, then take it down and do it all over again.

I did the unmentionalble the other day and threw some relaxer on it.

Unfortunately my hair wasnt having any of it and I am now still typing with a shrunken fro avec fluffier


I had braids in for a month but when I took it out I was faced with the tangles and knots/poofiness and I couldnt take that ish any more and Im not even at your length yet.


I hate the feeling about having to explain myself If I just feel like cheating once in a while. Sometimes I catch a bus when I could have walked, sometimes I get a take-out when I have perfectly good food in the fridge. Sometimes u just cant be bothered.

I am on my way to buying my first pressing comb right now

 

[DarkVictory]

...I wonder what our ancestors did with their hair or did they even care? (Seriously)

Some of them, at least, had a whole 'nother type of thing going on: scroll down on this page to the "wives of the Oba" photo
http://www.randafricanart.com/Benin_Oba_commemorative_heads.html


Poohbear, and everybody else fighting the knots: just wanted to drop a word of encouragement. Natural hair does require its own kind of maintenance. Good luck to you!

 

[JustKiya]

As my avi line says - hair for ME, not for THEE.

If you want to press your hair, go head with it. It's yours! And bottom line, no matter what any of these words on the screen has to say, you are the one who has to take care of it, and the one who has to be happy with it - and doing what you need to do to acheive that makes - sense.

 

[scarcity21]

Some of them, at least, had a whole 'nother type of thing going on: scroll down on this page to the "wives of the Oba" photo
http://www.randafricanart.com/Benin_Oba_commemorative_heads.html

Underneath whatever that is..it seems like they have natural hair........


Poohbear, and everybody else fighting the knots: just wanted to drop a word of encouragement. Natural hair does require its own kind of maintenance. Good luck to you!

I second that...the knots get to me too...but i just braid it up and forguddaboutit!

 

[Poohbear]

If you do press your hair try using the Mizani Thermasmooth system. Also if u haven't already, look at Beauty Witch's fotki (BHM). She has a nice hair style with small braids not completed braided that she can wear for at least a week. The ends curl and look really nice. It might add a different style for you. I think Turner girl also used the technique as well. HTH. Good luck.

I'm not a member of BHM, what is the link to her fotki?

And Turnergirl's hair is a looser texture than mine. If I braided my hair and left the ends out, I would have a tangled, knotted mess on my ends.

 

[Poohbear]

I love love love Tresemme conditioners, especially the moisture rich and salon silk! They keep my natural hair soooooo soft!!!!!! I only wash once a week and only comb through after I wash in sections and when my hair is absolutely loaded with Tresseme. It has worked wonders so far. I am so happy. BUT i am still considering relaxing later this year to reduce the thickness a bit. I am happy I found Tresemme to help with detangling but I will have to use it everyday to keep the hair soft as it dries out again mid week but i dot have the time to wash more than once a week!

I've tried Tresemme Conditioner for Split ends. I used up the whole bottle. It helped with detangling in the shower, but it really didn't do anything to help the condition of my hair.

 

[DarkVictory]

Scarcity21:
Underneath whatever that is..it seems like they have natural hair........

It does. Imagine the girl in the shampoo commercial trying to get her hair into that "bird beak" style - tangles and all, we don't have it that bad.

As my avi line says - hair for ME, not for THEE.

If you want to press your hair, go head with it. It's yours! And bottom line, no matter what any of these words on the screen has to say, you are the one who has to take care of it, and the one who has to be happy with it - and doing what you need to do to acheive that makes - sense.

Words of wisdom!

 

[ladylibra]

i love my natural hair, and i know you love yours too... it just comes with a different set of issues than relaxed hair. and as you know i am not anti-heat either. i just had abused my hair with too much heat in the past, so i weaned myself from it. but i still love to straighten my hair sometimes and see my true length. i am much more cautious with heat than i used to be and i have yet to see any negative effects from using it on my natural hair.

Poohbear... after reading many of your posts, i just hope you find something that works best for you. i know your hair will be lovely either way, but you wanna enjoy it along this journey or else what's the point?

 

[PatTodd]

This thread is very timely for me. I am a "new" 3c natural, and I have been wearing wash n' gos all summer (since June). I finger detangle my hair 1-2 times a week when I wash, and comb once a week to really get out shed hairs. I do feel like it's never fully detangled. Sometimes I hear snaps while (I think) I'm gently pulling out knots. Just in the past couple of days I have started to wonder whether all the detangling is causing my hair to break and shed more than it should. It's like I feel hair anorexic, constantly checking to see if the (APL) length is still there, and whether it looks shorter from breakage. I'm afraid that I'm going to lose my length to detangling....I like being natural, I don't want to relax but I don't know how I am going to handle my hair when I can't wash n' go anymore due to the cold weather....

 

[TwistNMx]

Yes. Thank you for this thread and I commend you Poobear because you have come a long way.

 

[a_ caribbean_dream]

I CERTAINLY agree with your poohbear, splits shrinkage, and tangles are not fun, and they do seem unavoidable.

I too have also contemplated incorporating more heat into my regimen. Because I think my hair could handle it, if I am careful. I haven't already made this transition because I am not at my goal length. When I get more comfortable I will be straightening my hair, caring for my ends as a natural.

I suggest that you embrace both facets of your hair and try to find a way or balance that works for YOU. What may work for me, may not work for others. I like to leave my hair alone for months at a time then I go months thereafter manipulating it like crazy.

What it seems like from your post is that you enjoy your natural hair and your straightened hair, just do YOU.

Your hair is wonderfully thick by the way

 

[keluric]

Hey Poohbear!

First of all, your hair is looking great. I remember your beautiful puffs and twists from earlier in the year and you've made some wonderful progress!

I feel the same way you do. I think when we're working with 4a hair, it's very easy for it to tangle and curl back on itself. I used to wear my natural hair straightened 99.9%. I didn't know how to use heat properly and I didn't know my hairstylist was burning my hair off until it was too late.

Now that I rarely straighten, I have a unique challenge: finding ways to keep my hair UNSHRUNKEN. I realized very early as you're realizing that shrunken hair can be bad, bad news. My hair likes to curl and coil back on itself way too much for me to do the shrunken thing.

So I braid, I twist, I band, I bun... anything but let my hair dry shrunken. Besides, I think those styles keep my hair more detangled from wash to wash.

I think that if using heat works for you and keeps more hair on your head, go for it. Personally, I'm too lazy to use heat.

 

[naturaline]

i get what your saying- a lady was talking to me about the length of my hair y'day. it looks like half the length when in my normal braid'out. but strange thing is i dont really mind because when i do flat iron it WOWs people HEHEHE

im SO glad i dont get knots anymore! i can count the amount of hair that i loose- i ONLY comb/braid in the shower and its a breeze! thank God!

P.S. I love yout blown-out fro!!

 

[nissi]

Up to 2 years ago, I was natural for 3 years and when my hair got to bsl, it was a trip to deal with! Tangling, knotting, etc. unfortunately was a fact of life. Biosilk serum helped untangle it, but alas, CONES!!!

When I was a teenager I was natural, and got a professional press (no heavy grease though, just a deep conditioner and light oil) every 2 weeks and never had a problem because I was using hennalucent to coat and protect the hair.

I know, hennalucent is forbidden for the henna purists, but it worked wonderfully fine as far as protecting my natural hair and keeping it detangled, and the body and bounce it gave my hair was wonderful. Also, no reversion issues with hennalucent!

The key is not too much heat. So once a week/ twice a month's worth of heat on clean deep conditioned hair, the right moisture and someone who knows what they are doing should be fine. Before hennalucent, i was fine, but henna put me over the edge in strength, health and life to my hair.

 

[R4L]

Last night, I decided to wash out my frizzy straightened hair and I deep conditioned my hair with Motions Moisture Plus Conditioner. My hair is in much better shape.

Now, I have came up with another though...I really don't want to straighten my hair with a flat iron on a regular basis. I don't think a flat iron is the right tool for straightening my hair. I think that's why I got the frizzy ends as well... the flat iron just flattens my ends out rather than straightening them out. After drying my hair, I tested a small section of my hair. And that's what happened... it flattened my coily ends rather than straightening them. I even used a rattail comb to comb out the end while flat ironing it, and my ends still did not straighten out good. They were frizzy and rough from the flat iron. So I think a pressing comb would be better for straightening my hair type, but I don't have one at the moment, so I won't be trying that anytime soon.



Hopefully, I can stick with two strand twists to grow my hair out... if not, I'll just go buy an electric pressing comb to straighten my hair.

OR... I may just continue to do a bunch of different styles like Sera did to grow out her hair: http://public.fotki.com/Sera252/all_about_hair/

As long as I keep deep conditioning my hair, I think I will be fine.

Try the Maxiglide. When I tried to just flat iron my mop, it was not cute.

BUT, with the maxiglide, it comes out soooo good, with sooooo little work. Good Luck!

 

[GoldenBreeze]

Personally, I don't think using heat is very bad if used correctly. I've been natural most of my life, and used heat consistently before coming to LHCF. I never used high heat, and never used heat more than once per shampoo. That was once per week. My hair grew and maintained length, when I wanted it to (I cut it frequently). I always deep conditioned, always used a heat protectant, and always moisturized.

Now that I'm using heat infrequently (3x this year), I still deep condition, and moisturize, but I do not let my hair air dry without putting it in a braid, bun, bantu, large twists, or something. I do not have knots, or matting, or broken off ends, and it is bsl. It just doesn't seem practical to let curly, kinky, frizzy, cottony hair air dry without at least putting it into one braid if it is long enough. Ultimately, I think we just have to find what works for our individual hair, and allows us to achieve and maintain length. In my experience, as 3c, 4a, 4b, 5a, 5b hair gets longer allowing it to air dry and shrink does cause more tangles, matting and knots. That's my two cents, and I'm sticking to it.

 

[PinkSkates]

Originally posted by SSBD
Honestly i was beginning to think it was just me thinkin like that. When i was younger i was natural and my hair did very well with heat, even when i had a relaxer my hair was still good with heat, but the chemical was too much for my hair. I remember i posted a thread asking did anybody else's hair like a little heat and it wasn't many replies from naturals, so i didn't know what to think. So just like u i join the band wagon of just wearing it in it's natural strunkin state, but the problem with that is it would get so dry no matter what i put it in or how much i dced and as soon as it dried from the cw it was a dry mess with tangles and knots that matt and all type of stuff. But when i blow dry and cornrow my hair it stays conditioned and strong and feels good.

Last night i flat ironed my hair for the first time since going natural and i clipped my ends for the second time in my journey, and i was like wow i had to cut a lot of hair (which hurt) because the ends were knotted and tangled and breaking and falling and all of that. And i was thinkin when i use to get my hair washed and flatiron ever two weeks my ends did not look like this...it might not of had enough moisture, but the ends were not bad like this...

So i have always disagreed with the statement that straighten natural hair is not natural...theres no chemicals in it, so how isn't it natural. At this point im jut gonna wear it in cornrows for awhile. When my hair get longer and i can braid and protect it without blow drying than i will sometimes, but i don't know if wearing my hair in its strunkin state is good for it anymore.

Excellent post SSBD, and I totally agree with the bolded part a couple of mis-informed hair-care heffas had the nerve to say that to me and when I asked them "well since I have no chemicals in my hair and as soon as water/moisture touches my hair it reverts to its totally shrunken state, then what is my hair"...all I could hear were crickets chirping in the room; they had no idea what to say...

 

[AvaSpeaks]

I think more knots and tangles led to more breakage and less hair retention.

 

[Lucia]

Shrinkage is a royal pain in the ***, but I don't agree that straightening means your not natural, I think I'm natural and I straighten, not as often as I used to but I do. I had to cut my hair short when I was relaxed casue my hair could not handle relaxed being bone straight cause it's way to curly and it never dried straight anyways.

I think that if I don't get the results from product experimenting on my natural hair, then I might texturize but I don't want to damage my hair and ruin all the good progress I've made b/c my hair jsut may not like chemicals period.

Are any of you ladies tried www.kinkycurly.com products or noodle head, or Miss Jessie's buttercreme or curling custard-I'm going to experiment with them 1st before I make a decision on any chemicals.

 

[TwistNMx]

I think more knots and tangles led to more breakage and less hair retention.

I totally agree with you.