I couldn't help but towhen I read your post. Sadly enough Shimmie, they have been dressing like this for years
. They're just tacky IMO and they could definitely use a stylist!
![Thankyou :thankyou: :thankyou:](/smilies/thankyou.gif)
![Bighug :bighug: :bighug:](/smilies/bighug.gif)
God sent you in here to 'comfort' me.
![Cry4 :cry4: :cry4:](/smilies/cry4.gif)
![Lachen :lachen: :lachen:](/smilies/lachen70.gif)
![Lachen :lachen: :lachen:](/smilies/lachen70.gif)
![Lachen :lachen: :lachen:](/smilies/lachen70.gif)
I couldn't help but towhen I read your post. Sadly enough Shimmie, they have been dressing like this for years
. They're just tacky IMO and they could definitely use a stylist!
I find that Indian attire to be very elegant and unique. Those tops would be great for women who are curvy.![]()
I dress modestly according to my own definition. I think it's ridiculous that women have to hide the fact that they are women. And in my experience more often than not it's been other women have issues with my idea of modesty, not men. At my mother's church the women only wear oversized clothing and I would be amazed if anything other than their wrists were showing. So if I go in there with a knee-length A-line skirt, I'm going to be called all kinds of heathens.At some point you just have to pray for GOD to show you what you need to do and be done with it. If modesty for you is turtlenecks and ankle length skirts then by all means wear it but don't try and make it seem like that's the only way to be modest.
Would you ladies wear these modest outfits below?(Sorry, I just had to laugh):
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Shame on you Shimmie!
This is so wroonnnnnnng.
You couldn't GIVE these away, even if you 'cried' or paid someone to take them and WEAR them.![]()
Would you ladies wear these modest outfits below?(Sorry, I just had to laugh):
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Shame on you Shimmie!
Those are modest women of the Lord right there!
...and sexy! :eyebrows2
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Shame on you Shimmie!
Those are modest women of the Lord right there!
...and sexy! :eyebrows2
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I think the confusion lies in the fact we all may have different definitions of modesty. Personally, I feel that some may define modesty as the dress C pictures. I happen to think the women in dress B look appropriate. I think that there is a fine line between modesty and legalism. Women should be able to look like women. I don't think we should be legalists in regard to the way we dress. Women don't have to look like Group C to be holy women just as christians don't have to live as poor to appear more humble and modest.
DRESS B
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DRESS C
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I actually like the skirt on the 2nd outfit. I would wear that w/a fitted sweater and some boots.
Modesty to me is what I understand from the word of God. As a godly woman that is always the standard I use in anything I wear, think, act, say, etc...in all areas of my life. Modesty is to be temperate, avoiding excess, decent, not forward, not extreme, reasonable, humble in appearance, not pretentious, not flashy or garish. In defining modest I must also keep in mind the word of God says I am to be sober and shamefaced.
How can I do this in the world we live in? Ignore what I want to do and what the world says to do, but do what God's word says. From the beginning when Adam and Eve sinned God clothed them in animal skins, fig leaves sewed into aprons was not appropriate and pleasing to God. When God constructed the Tabernacle and the priest climbed the stairs to offer the sacrifices, God told Aaron to make britches to wear under the robes that reached to their knees to cover their nakedness. God cares about what I wear and the attitude of heart I have as I submit my will to his will.
What do I wear? Clothes that I deem attractive yet modest. Not tight, they don't reveal my butt or breast. They are always over the knee. I have quit a few long skirts similar to one pictured here. I love jackets, scrafs, and belts. I'm probably not considered fashionable by many, but my husband and I are pleased with my appearance-he compliments me all the time. I'm not trying to be sexy to others, only to my husband in private. First and far most though, I look in the mirror at home and in the dressing room of a clothing stores and ask myself will this please God. If not, it ain't going home with me.
Am I responsible for men lusting? Yes and no. As long as I dress according to God's word I am not giving him a reason with my appearance to lust. If a man looks on me with lust even if I'm complying with the word, then thats on him. I don't worry about it.
By the way, I know quite a few women who dress in the long calico-looking dresses. They have a very sweet spirit-not all women who dress that way are mean witches. The dresses are not what I would wear, but I don't knock it if thats what you like. After all as a Christian woman I am to look on the inward heart or inner man, not on the outward.
Hey AfriPrincess, this is an excellent question for discussion.How do you all feel about Designer Labels?
Hey AfriPrincess, this is an excellent question for discussion.![]()
I wouldn't call it a sin, however, as far as I'm concerned, they're 'rip-offs' and I look even better in garments that aren't Designer so and so's.I've also seen many 'Designer' lines that were absolutely horrible and had very poor workmanship and quality!
For many people (not targeting Christians, but society in general which may include some Christians) it's a badge of pride that they had money to buy and wear so and so's name jeans, etc. and this is also bondage.
Some folks don't feel imporant neither well dressed unless they have a Designer label.![]()
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It's one of the disaster's of our community. I remember when 'Jordans' and Nike's came out and if you didn't have a pair of Michael Jordan or Nike sports shoes / jacket on, you were an outcast. The tragedy is that so many young kids lost their lives over this, being shot and robbed of their 'name' brand clothing. An outrageous tragedy, all because of the 'status' that's been placed upon a 'name.'.
I know way too many women (and men) who spend their last dime just to wear a name. And they're broke ! Home bills past due; car notes late, and will never miss a hair appointment or getting their nails 'did'.....
Why go through all of that ? ? ? All they are doing is making the creators of the 'designer names' richer and while they're living in 3 or 4 houses, their consumers are living on the edge of eviction and forclosures. While these Designers have chauffers and Jags, and Benz, BMW's, their consumers are walking and getting their cars re-po'd. or towed with a yellow boot on it.
God calls us to use wisdom and to be better stewarts of our finances. I've learned that I do not have to spend a lot of money or wear a name to look good. Thank God!
:Rose:
Good analysis. That's exactly how I feel.
I was also thinking about when Christians help the misfortunate. I mean, would a Christian go to a homeless shelter with Dior sunglasses, Prada shoes, a Chanel dress with Tiffany jewelery? I know that is a little extreme but I wonder sometimes....
My husband told me...if you have to ask me if your outfit is appropirate then you already have your answer!
It is our RESPONSIBILITY to be modest. At my church, yes, we do have some older women that are constantly correcting what the younger ones wear. But the bible does tell older women to teach the younger women. But its a delicate balance and there is usually some generational issues rather than just modesty issues. For example:
1. My mom and most older women at church believe its only right to wear slips and pantyhose when wearing dresses. I only wear slips if the dress is thin or see-thru (like white, not sheer lol). And I detest pantyhose and see no reason to wear them (unless Im cold) if they are flesh-toned and you cant tell if i have them on or not.
2. Leggings are not substitutes for pants. Nor can you wear shorts of any kind (though you may get away with capris in the summer).
3. No open-toes shoes in the pulpit or choir stand...not really sure how they try to justify this one.
The funny thing is...we have these same rules at my job! (except for the slip).
But we come to work in uniform, with few complaints, because those are the rules that are established.
But we often find it hard to comply to the Holy spirit in matters of modest dress.
I had problems with this in my youth. I had grown up dressing modestly cause thats what I was taught. But as I graduated and went to college my hems got higher and necklines lower. I began to enjoy and crave the attention I recieved from men and tried to keep up with the worlds fashions. By the time I graduated my wardrobe was atrocious!
When I joined my present church my clothes were not modest. But gradually as I began to cultivate my relationship with Christ and had a mentor (like 8 years my senior) who I saw was fashionable, up-to-date, and modest. I began to feel shame at the things I wore and began to examine why I wore them.
I realized that I had gotten caught up in the worlds fashion show that said the more skin you showed, or shape you outlined, or guys attention you drew the better. The world said I should be able to wear what I want and celebrate the body God had given me. I shouldnt be confined cuz of what other people thought of me.
I was more concerned with the outward appearance than the inside. But by the unction of the Holy Ghost I began to throw away those clothes and I still love to shop and fashion but now I choose what is flattering on me and not sexy (except for the bedroom lol), whats modest and not flashy. When I get dressed for church I make sure I can lift my hands, jump up and down, and bend over without exposing anything!
By no means is it easy, and I still struggle sometimes when something I believe is cute is not modest. I also think that certain fashions are acceptable on certain age groups, as well as certain body types that are not acceptable on others.
Sorry for the long post lol!
I had problems with this in my youth. I had grown up dressing modestly cause thats what I was taught. But as I graduated and went to college my hems got higher and necklines lower.
I began to enjoy and crave the attention I recieved from men and tried to keep up with the worlds fashions. By the time I graduated my wardrobe was atrocious!
Afri, I just wanted to say that you truly have a gift for presenting soul searching topics of discussion.Good analysis. That's exactly how I feel.
I was also thinking about when Christians help the misfortunate. I mean, would a Christian go to a homeless shelter with Dior sunglasses, Prada shoes, a Chanel dress with Tiffany jewelery? I know that is a little extreme but I wonder sometimes....
I talked to my boyfriend about how women dress in general. (He said some curse words that I blocked out but I feel is relevant to how guys view women attire)...
First, he said he likes how I dress conservatively most of the time, but he mentioned one thing in particular that I wear....leggings. He feels like leggings are okay to wear around the house but not out in public where guys can see your p**** print.
Even if I wear a long shirt over the leggings, he said it will still make a man think about what's underneath because of how the leggings fit to my butt and thighs. He says tight clothing is not conservative, and he feels like the woman is trying to attract themselves to men even if she may not be consciously intending to. Back when he was single, he said he was actually turned off by women who wear clothing like Applebottom, Rocawear, Babyphat, etc. because he felt like they were trying to attract attention to their bodies with the flashy colors and labels. It makes the man forget about trying to get to know the woman as a person.
However, that did not keep him from "hollerin'" at them because most guys would see them as a quick f*** and nothing more. Also showing breast clevage and too much skin can make a man look at you the wrong way. He also mentioned jewelry and makeup can make a man think of you differently if it is not conservative.
Men will not look at you as girlfriend or wife material when you do not dress or put yourself together modestly or conservatively. Yes, they might be attracted and even think you look good, but not for anything serious.
I talked to my boyfriend about how women dress in general. (He said some curse words that I blocked out but I feel is relevant to how guys view women attire)...
First, he said he likes how I dress conservatively most of the time, but he mentioned one thing in particular that I wear....leggings. He feels like leggings are okay to wear around the house but not out in public where guys can see your p**** print. Even if I wear a long shirt over the leggings, he said it will still make a man think about what's underneath because of how the leggings fit to my butt and thighs. He says tight clothing is not conservative, and he feels like the woman is trying to attract themselves to men even if she may not be consciously intending to. Back when he was single, he said he was actually turned off by women who wear clothing like Applebottom, Rocawear, Babyphat, etc. because he felt like they were trying to attract attention to their bodies with the flashy colors and labels. It makes the man forget about trying to get to know the woman as a person. However, that did not keep him from "hollerin'" at them because most guys would see them as a quick f*** and nothing more. Also showing breast clevage and too much skin can make a man look at you the wrong way. He also mentioned jewelry and makeup can make a man think of you differently if it is not conservative. Men will not look at you as girlfriend or wife material when you do not dress or put yourself together modestly or conservatively. Yes, they might be attracted and even think you look good, but not for anything serious.
This is the attitude that some men have. The sad thing is that we as women continue to accept that this is o.k. and actually believe that they are in some way showing approval for those of us who are modest. However, this is the belief of men who truly have NO respect for women. They believe that according to how they dress they have the right to treat women as less than human. While the woman believes that the man is genuinely interested in a relationship the man is trying to find a way to victimize them. I'm sorry, having sex with someone just because they look easy is low and shows that you have little respect for them or yourself. After they finish disrespecting women they deem as unworthy because they are showing cleavage or maybe their dress is too short they then move on. The feel somehow they deserve better than the females they are treating as objects. So they look for modest christian woman to marry. Why would we want to marry someone like that? How is that any less offensive than what they have been doing to the "unmodest" women? They actually think that they deserve someone who they feel has not been used and abused. They seem to forget that they were the ones using. So they offer us them. How are they any different than the women that they have been dating? A true man, a christian man, tries to help the problem rather than looking for ways to exploit someone they believe is weak. A man once told me that if you treat a woman like a lady she will rise to the occasion. We need more men like that. They could show these women that they deserve to be respected regardless to how she is dressed. By showing them a different way of being they could help the women realize that they are more than just a sex object. Once this is accomplished, they will act and dress differenetly. Instead, women keep telling themselves that we should accept these no good men who made it a practice of dogging women like they are some sort of prize. It may be how men feel, but we as women need to stop validating their feelings.
I talked to my boyfriend about how women dress in general. (He said some curse words that I blocked out but I feel is relevant to how guys view women attire)...
First, he said he likes how I dress conservatively most of the time, but he mentioned one thing in particular that I wear....leggings. He feels like leggings are okay to wear around the house but not out in public where guys can see your p**** print. Even if I wear a long shirt over the leggings, he said it will still make a man think about what's underneath because of how the leggings fit to my butt and thighs. He says tight clothing is not conservative, and he feels like the woman is trying to attract themselves to men even if she may not be consciously intending to. Back when he was single, he said he was actually turned off by women who wear clothing like Applebottom, Rocawear, Babyphat, etc. because he felt like they were trying to attract attention to their bodies with the flashy colors and labels. It makes the man forget about trying to get to know the woman as a person. However, that did not keep him from "hollerin'" at them because most guys would see them as a quick f*** and nothing more. Also showing breast clevage and too much skin can make a man look at you the wrong way. He also mentioned jewelry and makeup can make a man think of you differently if it is not conservative. Men will not look at you as girlfriend or wife material when you do not dress or put yourself together modestly or conservatively. Yes, they might be attracted and even think you look good, but not for anything serious.
I talked to my boyfriend about how women dress in general. (He said some curse words that I blocked out but I feel is relevant to how guys view women attire)...
First, he said he likes how I dress conservatively most of the time, but he mentioned one thing in particular that I wear....leggings. He feels like leggings are okay to wear around the house but not out in public where guys can see your p**** print. Even if I wear a long shirt over the leggings, he said it will still make a man think about what's underneath because of how the leggings fit to my butt and thighs. He says tight clothing is not conservative, and he feels like the woman is trying to attract themselves to men even if she may not be consciously intending to. Back when he was single, he said he was actually turned off by women who wear clothing like Applebottom, Rocawear, Babyphat, etc. because he felt like they were trying to attract attention to their bodies with the flashy colors and labels. It makes the man forget about trying to get to know the woman as a person. However, that did not keep him from "hollerin'" at them because most guys would see them as a quick f*** and nothing more. Also showing breast clevage and too much skin can make a man look at you the wrong way. He also mentioned jewelry and makeup can make a man think of you differently if it is not conservative. Men will not look at you as girlfriend or wife material when you do not dress or put yourself together modestly or conservatively. Yes, they might be attracted and even think you look good, but not for anything serious.