NO confidence wearing long hair?

R

RegaLady

New Member
Hey ladies, I was wondering if any of have ever felt insecure with long hair?:look: Like, I know confidence isn't in your hair and yaddy, yaddy, ya:rolleyes: but I have worn long weave before and I didn't really feel that confident in it. I would chalk it up to 'long hair'. So, I am wondering if you feel 'flyer' with long hair. Or as it grows out, are you feeling like it isn't suiting you. I kind of want to know what to expect.
 
caribeandiva said:
I can't wait for the ladies with longer hair to answer this one! :popcorn:
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You silly:lachen:...you just on yo couch waiting arent you!!

Nope I never had that feeling:nono:...And im sorry you may feel like this....the longer the better for me!!!:yep:....I LOVE LONG HAIR!!...I love my hair more now that it is healthier and I know now how to take care of it which makes growing it longer all the better!....sooo the insecurity (if I did have any) would come from unhealthy and damaged hair wheather if it was long or short.

BTW...you may be the type of woman who loves short & sassy hair and that is FINE!:yep: Some woman just perfer shorter hair and feel this is what makes them happier and feel more confident...so just because you are an member to this forum does not obligate or force you to love or grow long hair...do what makes you happy wheather it is long and healthy or short and healthy!!


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http://fotki.com/denettra/
 
The shortest my hair has ever been is between APL and BSL, but it stayed around BSL for about a dozen years, and I actually never believed it would grow any longer, even though it had been about waistlength when I was a child. Then I got pregnant a few times, had a couple of kids, never had time to do anything to my hair anymore, and lo and behold, it was suddenly past waistlength. However, I almost never straighten it, and it shrinks up to APL-BSL, so the rare times that I have straightened it since it grew this long, it kind of feels as if it gets in the way. I don't think confidence comes into play, but I do tend to touch it a lot when straightened, because it annoys me by getting caught in things, and I'm not used to it enough. Unfortunately, the touching gives other people the impression that I am trying to "flaunt" my hair, leading to unpleasant comments. I have to admit that it is almost a relief when the humidity inevitably hits and my hair starts shrinking and poofing back up, :lol:.
 
It's a strange feeling. I love that my hair is getting longer. I am more confident now because of the fact that the hair is all mine. When I wore weaves, I wasn't at all confident. Sometimes, I get self concious with the comments if I wear it out but I mean I'd rather comments on my own hair than on a weave.
 
Compared with others, my hair isn't that long, but sometimes I wonder what I am attempting to grow it so long for. And personally I go long or short at whim, but I get embarassed when others notice and say how fast my hair has grown or how it seemed shorter just a while ago.

If I could grow my hair in a vacuum, I would be happy. Attention bothers me...and when I complain, I have to worry my boyfriend to death, because other ladies wouldn't understand and might think I am being condescending?? is that the right word...I fear they will think I am complaining just to fetch compliments and that couldn't be further from the truth. I love you guys, I can complain here and fret over hair anorexia and find comfort.
 
I am a bit insecure. If I happen to wear it down then my mind starts racing (Does it look okay?) and the doubt sets in any time I see someone with really nice hair - short or long. Buns put my mind at ease. :yep:
 
Other people considered my hair long but I didn't thanks to LHCF. My hair used to be past my Shoulders but not quite APL. Now it is shorter due to breakage. I like me with longer hair. I feel it elongates my face and gives me a younger appearance.

I needed confidence in rocking a shorter due.
 
Maybe you didnt feel the confidence because it wasn't your hair? I feel the confidence with a weave or with my own hair, i just feel sexier with long straight hair.
 
My hair is currently a texlaxed armpit-length recently cut (somewhat unintentionally!) from brastrap-length. I am sort of known for always wearing my hair pulled back but recently started to wear my hair down more in a rollerset. I wear it sort of "Victoria's Secret style" and sometimes I feel that it looks too sexy or something! So I have mixed feeling about it - almost like I feel less confident with my hair down and curly. Although I get a lot of compliments on my hair, I get self conscious about it.
 
No lie, my hair is my safety blanket, when I didn't have long hair I felt unattractive, but when my hair started growing I was really happy, when I left for the navy we had to cut our hair, but I had cut all the relaxer out and didn't really care about what length it was....now my hair is apl and I gained weight from being pregnant, I feel attractive because of my hair, and I can't wait until it gets longer.....I think I'm the opposite of your question....... :)
 
When i have my hair out and straight i feel pretty, BUT if i get in a room or around a big group of AA women with hair shoulder length or shorter i feel like they will hate on me (cuz lord knows i was hating on chicks with long hair back in the days myself - lol). So in that case, i would tuck it in my shirt or jacket. Also - like someone else said, sometimes it just gets in the way. I def feel better and have more confidence knowing its real rather than when i wear long weaves or pieces.
 
GoingNatural said:
Maybe you didnt feel the confidence because it wasn't your hair? I feel the confidence with a weave or with my own hair, i just feel sexier with long straight hair.
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That is whatI was wondering. I wear wigs that are long and short and I have one that is long and straight and I dont really feel too cute when I wear it. I dont think it is because it is long but because it just have that sort of fake look! I hope this makes sense.
 
I wear my hair up so much that when I do wear it down I don't feel like myself. But I realized I have beautiful hair- compared to the heads I see in my town- so I'll be wearing it out more often once the weather becomes nicer.
 
To be honest, I usually feel self-conscious in a long weave or long braids. I tend to ball it up into a ponytail or bun to hide some of the length. I guess this is because I'm not used to seeing myself with long hair? It's funny because my goal is to grow my hair down to WSL one day ... we'll see if I gain more confidence by then.
 
I feel confident wearing my hair down because of the fact that its ALL mine. I never wear weaves or wigs....might try one some day...lol...but i love when ppl wonder if its really my hair...even if i show them! LOL!!
 
I personally feel more confident when my hair is longer; it's more flattering to my face. It's really an individual thing.
 
VERy interesting, ladies!
I've often wondered if it is just the weave that I don't feel so good about and not the length. I am so accustomed to short hair that as my hair grows out it feels a bit scary. Maybe when I get out of the awkward length stage, I will accept it more.
Some of you mentioned that it was a security blanket. I also get that as my hair gets longer. I do like short and sassy looks, BUT I want to experiment with other lengths before I said that I found my comfort hairstyle/length.

Keep the responses coming! This is interesting!
 
I don't feel as confident with any hair that is not my own.

When it's mine - you can't tell me nothing - short, long, whatever. I feel better with hair that is my own.

I have seen some really nice natural looking weaves that I would rock though. I would never wear super long fake hair. I can point out everytime if someone with super long hair has a weave or if it is her own - They just carry it differently.
 
yamilee21 said:
The shortest my hair has ever been is between APL and BSL, but it stayed around BSL for about a dozen years, and I actually never believed it would grow any longer, even though it had been about waistlength when I was a child. Then I got pregnant a few times, had a couple of kids, never had time to do anything to my hair anymore, and lo and behold, it was suddenly past waistlength. However, I almost never straighten it, and it shrinks up to APL-BSL, so the rare times that I have straightened it since it grew this long, it kind of feels as if it gets in the way. I don't think confidence comes into play, but I do tend to touch it a lot when straightened, because it annoys me by getting caught in things, and I'm not used to it enough. Unfortunately, the touching gives other people the impression that I am trying to "flaunt" my hair, leading to unpleasant comments. I have to admit that it is almost a relief when the humidity inevitably hits and my hair starts shrinking and poofing back up, :lol:.
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I have been here with my hair and it's no where near waist length. I closed my hair up in a car and elevator door. It's just a lot to deal with especially when I am used to my hair being safely snug around my round face. When it's out of sight, it's out of mind and usually somewhere it shouldn't be.
 
If I feel a little awkward, it's usually on the best of my big hair days. You know when humidity is just right and your hair gets huger than huge. There is something about huge all over the place hair that comes of as sensuous yet sexy in an undeniable way. It's probably because it looks like you just got out of the bed, if you know what I mean.

Anyway, this is the hair I love the most. A beautiful glow, glossy, nude lips, and an effortless looking boho fro is my ideal look. Yet when I get there sometimes it's too much. I just feel like a female animal during heat after spraying pheremones. Wayyy to much male attention. That makes me pull my hair back often.
 
I guess I have "long hair." :giggle:

The only time I do not feel confident is when my ends aren't looking great. I also feel that other women may judge me more harshly because of my long hair.

Other than that, I *always* feel more confident when wearing it down. I can't wait to wear it down again!
 
I feel confident with long or short hair - but I am definitely more self conscious with hair that isn't mine. I want to get a wig this summer but even though I think it will look cute, I know I have to get over my issues of how I will feel wearing it in public.
 
PatTodd said:
My hair is currently a texlaxed armpit-length recently cut (somewhat unintentionally!) from brastrap-length. I am sort of known for always wearing my hair pulled back but recently started to wear my hair down more in a rollerset. I wear it sort of "Victoria's Secret style" and sometimes I feel that it looks too sexy or something! So I have mixed feeling about it - almost like I feel less confident with my hair down and curly. Although I get a lot of compliments on my hair, I get self conscious about it.
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OMG! That is me. I wear a pony most of the time. When I do wear my hair down I get so much attention from family and friends. It makes me feel uncomfortable sometimes to be the center of attention. I won't say I don't have confidence with long hair(mine is BSL) but I do wish that others didn't make such a big deal about it. I don't even think my hair looks all that good half the time.
 
Xavier said:
When I do wear my hair down I get so much attention from family and friends. It makes me feel uncomfortable sometimes to be the center of attention. I won't say I don't have confidence with long hair(mine is BSL) but I do wish that others didn't make such a big deal about it. I don't even think my hair looks all that good half the time.
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Get out of my head this is exactly what I was thinking. I can not stand the attention and people putting their hands in my hair. Now I do like it when they say it looks so much healthier. My hair ain't even near long either. My ultimate goal is apl or bsl for the purposes of better looking buns & ponytails and possibly wearing it out at some point. Not necessarily for flipping it or for it having that swang.
 
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