My Boss Tells Me NO MORE BUNS! How Can I Look My Best & Keep Hair Healthy?

I agree with all the gel/scarf suggestions.
i'm not too sure about all the accessories, though-the scarves/flowers, etc. are more casual/girly IMO....i would focus more on nice earrings.
for example, i think this bun only looks decent/professional because
1) My eyebrows are done (not my fave threading job cause i feel she didn't get them perfectly even, but you get the point)
2) it's very slick
3) i'm wearing nice (IMO) earrings
4) it looks like a very neat donut from the back, sorry that i can't provide a pic
*ignore how huge my head looks in the pic, please, and the fact that i look tired*:look:
misce114-1.jpg

if my hair gets this sleek as a 4a/b, you'll have no problems.:yep:
why not try this out tomorrow and see what she says?
 
wyldcurlz said:
for those of you who asked, here is a pic of my bun (at the end of the day)

bun1.png
Click to expand...

Sorry if this is blunt.

The bun definitely looks unprofessional and messy for the type of office that you work in. It just looks like you rolled out of bed and didn't really brush it. I know this was end of the day, but in the corporate world there's no excuse for your hair to look like that at the end of the day. I think your boss was looking out for your best interested by letting you know what's up. You may need to take a day or a night after work and play with different hairstyles in order to figure out how to try something different. I took me some time before I mastered different styles, but practice makes perfect! I wish you the best.

**My hair is in the 3cish range and what helps laying my hair down is braiding my hair into tight plaits after I wash and letting it air dry. This week after I let my hair air dry and unraveled the plaits, I combed my hair with a wide tooth comb and then I put a healthy glop of conditioner on my hair and brushed, made a bun and put a scarf over my head. I havent brushed my hair since this morning, so I hope it works Photo 120.jpg ***
 
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OP- not everyone can pull off a bun, no matter how well put together, slicked down or intricate. You gotta be honest with yourself, are buns a flattering look for you?
 
danggggggggg, that shyt is messed up.....

i say DO YOU!!!!! its your hair, not her's. im getting upset now, coz i wear buns all the time. she has no right to say that. wow, the nerve of her.
 
Wow. Isn't that breaking the law? You're gonna make me dig up my employment law books and get to researching this case. . .I mean situation.

Is there anything in your employment contract about hairstyles? Practice those buns if there is and learn to make perfect buns. get on youtube.

If it is not in there, then keep it neat and. . .I don't know what i'd do. I'd cry too.
 
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Eritreladiee said:
OP- not everyone can pull off a bun, no matter how well put together, slicked down or intricate. You gotta be honest with yourself, are buns a flattering look for you?
Click to expand...

the answer to this question probably is 'not at all.' i've had a few cute side ones and such and they're okay, but the standard issue bun, i don't know that i could get it to look good on me. need another low maintenance look.
 
wyldcurlz said:
the answer to this question probably is 'not at all.' i've had a few cute side ones and such and they're okay, but the standard issue bun, i don't know that i could get it to look good on me. need another low maintenance look.
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I really do think you could pull it off, because the bun part is alright, it's just the crown area that needs a little help. You just need to work on smoothing it, that's all. I think naturalmanenyc has given you the best advice. I've walked around with my hair in a similar state to the picture you've posted and I've had to admit that at times it's not the most sophisticated look. Any styling product and scarf could help you out immensely.
 
I know no two heads of hair are exactly alike, but we seem to have a similar texture. As far as styling goes I think all you need is gel. That's all. I don't need a scarf nor a brush...just damp hair, wet hands, and gel. At the end of the day, the front of my hair looks as slick and wavy as it did when I walked into work that morning.
 
Bene said:
I really do think you could pull it off, because the bun part is alright, it's just the crown area that needs a little help. You just need to work on smoothing it, that's all. I think naturalmanenyc has given you the best advice. I've walked around with my hair in a similar state to the picture you've posted and I've had to admit that at times it's not the most sophisticated look. Any styling product and scarf could help you out immensely.
Click to expand...

Thanks! i'll look for her advice. i want my hair like your siggy pic!! that's gorgeous!!!! i've just got to work on a few things because all i know how to do is flat-iron my hair. and, as i've mentioned here, i don't want to do that allll the time. i want to look good and retain length.
 
I was hoping it was a polished professional bun so I could get all worked up on your behalf. The bun is a tad messy. Try smoothing it down a bit and not making the bun part so tight looking.

Try a neat polished bun. No need to straighten I have 4Z hair and with the right leave-in and a scarf overnight, I have people complimenting me. I love half wigs too.

I've had to have hair and wardrobe discussions with many employees, in a rainbow of races, both male and female and undecided.

Some made changes and flourished others didn't and flourished. Some choose hair styles over employment. Some chose hair color over promotions (you and your neon blue Mohawk enjoy the mail room and find comfort in the fact that you didn't conform).

Life isn't fair and in a perfect world we wouldn't be having this discussion.

YMMV
 
CocoBunny said:
I was hoping it was a polished professional bun so I could get all worked up on your behalf. The bun is a tad messy. Try smoothing it down a bit and not making the bun part so tight looking.

Try a neat polished bun. No need to straighten I have 4Z hair and with the right leave-in and a scarf overnight, I have people complimenting me. I love half wigs too.

I've had to have hair and wardrobe discussions with many employees, in a rainbow of races, both male and female and undecided.

Some made changes and flourished others didn't and flourished. Some choose hair styles over employment. Some chose hair color over promotions (you and your neon blue Mohawk enjoy the mail room and find comfort in the fact that you didn't conform).
Life isn't fair and in a perfect world we wouldn't be having this discussion.

YMMV
Click to expand...

:yep: Double, Triple, quadruple thanks. Neon blue mowhawk is an excellent example! Wish we were in heaven...sigh
 
I didn't read the whole thread yet, because it's too long to read in one setting, but anyway . . . just wear your hair down as soon as you arrive at the office, and put it up as soon as you leave at the end of the day. My former coworker always put her hair up at 5:00 p.m. in the ladies room before she left the building, because she took public transportation.

At least it will be protected from the air most of the time, but not the eight hours you're at the office. Wear a silk scarf on your shoulders to keep your ends from breaking if you're shoulder length. You will still reach your hair goal.

I gradually stopped wearing my hair down every day and rolling it every night. Once I stopped rolling it, my boss and other coworkers would remind me that it was growing. I just got tired of sleeping on hard rollers; however, I would wear my hair in a bun on top of my head while sleeping at night to give it the effect that it had been rolled when I wore it out the following morning. To my surprise, it really started retaining length, and this was before I started my hair care regimen.

In this economy, it's a privilege to have a job; and in my opinion, a job is more important than hair. If you don't want to wear your hair out, fine. There are a lot of cute wigs out there that look natural (100 percent human hair).

Don't let your boss' comments bother you. There is a solution to this scenario.
 
I agree with previous posters - your bun is a little too messy.

You have to slick down the front no matter what, whether it be with gel or gel + water + scarf or whatever you might need.

Even if you wear your hair down and curly, it needs to be non-frizzy in a corporate setting. :yep:

I'm sorry you're going through this. The hair doesn't have to be straightened, just neat.

Now post a new non-frizzy bun :grin:

Good luck Wyldcurlz! :Rose:
 
Co-signing on BMP's suggestions particularly the Curlformers! Really these are a godsend for HHJ! You don't have to use heat at all, if you don't want to and sleep in them (I do and its a bit uncomfortable but managable). Alternatively, you could sit under a bonnet dryer (a gentler heat since its not direct).

The extra-wide and long will give you soft waves and the regular long and wide ones are better for curlier styles.

There are loads of good demos on YT. IMHO, they are faster and more reliable than flexirods and I was a die-hard flexirod user for over 10 years!:grin:

Re: Buns, like you I'm not great at them but I found that using a donut really helps mine look better. IMHO, the fuller the bun the better it looks. Donuts are super easy to use too. (check YT again) That said, even with a donut my buns would not work in a fashionable professional setting. I only wear my buns when I need something v. quick and easy. For me flowers or ribbons are not appropiate daytime looks and can also look a little teenage or "trying too hard!" without making the appearance more professional. Those can work it go for it! But that's not me on a regular basis.

I work in the arts where the demand is to be edgy and professional and on point and most importantly make it look effortless (not necessarily be effortless!). There were times when I needed to get a sew-in because I had too many projects, events, mtgs, etc. and I needed to show that I could do it all, be it all and look good, no make that great, while doing it. :cup:

Good luck and keep us updated.
 
I would say your bun does look more back office than front office IMO. Thank heavens your boss told you to step up your game.

I usually stink at dry hair buns but I usually throw some deep conditioner in it brush it back and it stays neat the whole day. I usually keep it 2/3 days before washing it out if I'm not going to be following up with a wash and go. I agree with using ornate hair clips to emphasize that you did this intentionally.
 
When did the bun not be professional..I mean unless your in a stripper position or something overt sexy then your hair has nothing to do with your performance..makes me want to shank her..
 
Girlfriend!
I'm the queen of hot mess, and I can put together a better bun that that. You have a lot more hair to make pretty buns too. Smooth your hair better into the bun, and put on a scrunchy or other accessories.

That bun looks like one you'd wear out to swimming or for a run.

I think you can dress up your buns and make them neater and ask your boss if they are okay.

Sometimes I kinda part my hair to the side, and still pull it back into a bun instead of straight back. That might be more flattering for your face.

You know what I also have been attempting? I've been doing one french braid in the back. And again, you're going to be able to pull if off much better than me because your hair is longer.

If you can't get your edges to lay down... a simple black headband might work. I see Michelle Obama in those with her buns. I don't know why, but a headband dresses up and frames your face better than just slicked back hair.
 
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I didn't want to comment until I saw the bun and now that I have, I definitely agree with your boss and your parents. I have a feeling that it doesn't look a whole lot better than that in the mornings. I had the same problem. I couldn't get a decent looking bun to save my life. They always looked a hot mess. Every morning when I got into work I could see my boss staring at my hair. I finally had to start experimenting with different gels to find the right one for me. Once I did, I went into work with a bun and my boss commented on how nice my hair looked. There are a host of fotkis and youtube videos you can go to for great hairstyle suggestions. I am sure you find a few that will work for you.
 
almond eyes said:
No that's not corporate America that is what black women are always telling themselves along with other myths. I know women who are natural in corporate America.

Best,
Almond Eyes
Click to expand...
society won't change and neither will the rules, if people are always conforming. I would never stress myself out and straighten my hair (4a natural BSL = 4-5 hours to get straight with wash, DC, detangling, blow fry, flat iron) and have to pray that one droplet of sweat won't touch it:look:. For a job. I agree that you have to "play the game", but for me, I have one life to live and I prefer to do it, not living by everyone else's rules. Yes there are rules like the red light example, that we must follow, but for the most part, I want to be in control of my life and my time. The whole puppet thing doesn't work for me. That is exactly why, like I said before, I chose an area that gives me the room to be myself. I could never be in a position where I am constantly being told what to do, especially with something like my hair. The joke is, most of the time we compromise and bust our butts for these jobs and they don't even compensate you adequately ($$$) for your work. No thanks!:perplexed

A lot of people are saying just to go along with it and it's just hair, but for black people, is it ever just hair? Our hair distinctly makes us 'different' and many people, including black people are very uncomfortable with it if it's not 'tamed'. I really think psychologically, it's not a good thing to internalize over time.
 
OP, you have beautiful hair, but that bun is a bit messy. It looks as if you are about to run to the grocery store. You need to talk alittle time to slick your hair and tame those frizzies. There isn't anything really wrong with your bun, but you need to at least make it look neat.
 
I am thinking if your bun was a little more polished your DM might not have made that comment. You know I can relate. I think a damp bun would work for you and your workout schedule too. Spray some moisturizer on, apply a creamy moisturizer or leave in, a little non alcoholic gel to your edges, and scarf it while you are getting ready. You have beautiful waves and I think the moisture would help to bring them out. Don't forget to accentuate with some nice earrings, when I wear my hair pulled back for work, I always overcompensate with nice earrings and a nice necklace. Don't let your hair hold you back from getting that promotion. I don't even think it is necessary that you have to learn to roller set or straighten. If you want to bun, bun. But learn how to do a fierce bun.
 
SelfStyled said:
I am thinking if your bun was a little more polished your DM might not have made that comment. You know I can relate. I think a damp bun would work for you and your workout schedule too. Spray some moisturizer on, apply a creamy moisturizer or leave in, a little non alcoholic gel to your edges, and scarf it while you are getting ready. You have beautiful waves and I think the moisture would help to bring them out. Don't forget to accentuate with some nice earrings, when I wear my hair pulled back for work, I always overcompensate with nice earrings and a nice necklace. Don't let your hair hold you back from getting that promotion. I don't even think it is necessary that you have to learn to roller set or straighten. If you want to bun, bun. But learn how to do a fierce bun.
Click to expand...
yea, I totally agree. I think it helps now that we have all seen the bun. I think it's a bit messy:look:. Just slap a little fantasia IC with sparklelites on that bad boy and you'll be fine. Maybe part it on the side and have a little "swoop". Just a mild one and twist the ponytail hair into a cute bun. Put a scarf on while you're driving to work and take it off right before you go in. It will definitely give you a smooth, polished finish. Good Luck OP! I hope it works out for you:yep:
 
wyldcurlz, tell us how to get this look? Maybe we can edit your hair styling process to get the look you need.
 
wyldcurlz said:
for those of you who asked, here is a pic of my bun (at the end of the day)

Click to expand...

This takes me back to my original post. (tweak your look before anything else) Spend some time in the mirror this weekend and get someone to assist you in updating/tweaking your protective styles)


BTW: we all offer our advice outta love :yep:
 
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