Glib Gurl
Well-Known Member
Any thoughts on this article?
thats Rozlips & family,a former lhcf member....
interesting article, but its all been said before...
OT: hope you feeling better, GG...
I've been saying this much all along, but noooooooo, they said there are not alot of BM's like that. When in fact there are. FAR to many. They severly overwhelm the suitably postured .
Sad.
- Black men are QUICKER than any other race of men, to date someone outside their race. "...Nearly three quarters of the 403,000 black-white couples in 2006 involved black husbands." That means that of all the interracial marraiges, black men married to someone other than us black women, make up 75%. Now, I wonder the number of WHITE men that are married to BLACK females? Exactly. They stick by their own mostly.
- Black men have a high rate of unemployment. "....They're nearly seven times more likely to be incarcerated than white men and more than twice as likely to be unemployed." Were not talking our fathers and uncles, they came from the admirable breed. I'm talking our age BM's. To many of them are lazy and create a negative stigma on the few who accomplish and work hard. The lazy,smokin crack, watchin you're house while you're at work type is messing it up for alot of us.
- Black men are not reaching for achievement or goals. "...low rates of black men in college." "...In 2004, 26.5 percent of black males ages 18 to 24 were enrolled in college versus 36.5 percent of black women that age, according to the American Council on Education's most recent statistics." If there are 2.65 million BMs in college and 3.65 million BW's in college, that yields 1.00 million Black females without a financially compatible mate(in most cases). Thats alot of girls.....something to think about........that leads to.....
- "Black women are refusing to comply with that message about just find yourself a good blue-collar man with a job, or just find a black man," Some BM's have decided not to settle. They dont want to get married to the guy who's 40 yrs old and lived with mama since birth. Or the guy practicing Buidism and she's a Christian. Or the guy who's known for being a classic, well seasoned ho around town. Or the one with 3 kids by 11 baby mama's, who wants him? When he comes to your table, he brings to many ppl !
- There are few decent BM's worth dating or marrying. "...If I was only meeting one guy a year, or every few years, that wasn't going to happen." The Alabama author eventually married white. "I think a lot of black women are realizing or feeling that the pickings are slim," she said. They're made even slimmer, grumble many black women, by
- When BMs who are decent and aspire for greater attainment, become rich or famous or a certain "status", they reach for what they feel is better than their counterpart, the BW, they reach for anything NOT Black. I wanted to get married (and) have children," she said. "...high rates of successful black men choosing blondes. For some, they argue, white wives are the ultimate status symbol."
I've been saying this much all along, but noooooooo, they said there are not alot of BM's like that. When in fact there are. FAR to many. They severly overwhelm the suitably postured .
You guys know I tell the truth. It's just the thruth. And Black women are so used to sticking by their men, most didnt want to admit to alot of what I've said. But hey, stick your head in the sand. Being in denial about reality have never a success make. Success in acquiring a relationship, getting married, having the kids or the white picket fence.
- Black men are QUICKER than any other race of men, to date someone outside their race. "...Nearly three quarters of the 403,000 black-white couples in 2006 involved black husbands." That means that of all the interracial marraiges, black men married to someone other than us black women, make up 75%. Now, I wonder the number of WHITE men that are married to BLACK females? Exactly. They stick by their own mostly.
- Black men have a high rate of unemployment. "....They're nearly seven times more likely to be incarcerated than white men and more than twice as likely to be unemployed." Were not talking our fathers and uncles, they came from the admirable breed. I'm talking our age BM's. To many of them are lazy and create a negative stigma on the few who accomplish and work hard. The lazy,smokin crack, watchin you're house while you're at work type is messing it up for alot of us.
- Black men are not reaching for achievement or goals. "...low rates of black men in college." "...In 2004, 26.5 percent of black males ages 18 to 24 were enrolled in college versus 36.5 percent of black women that age, according to the American Council on Education's most recent statistics." If there are 2.65 million BMs in college and 3.65 million BW's in college, that yields 1.00 million Black females without a financially compatible mate(in most cases). Thats alot of girls.....something to think about........that leads to.....
- "Black women are refusing to comply with that message about just find yourself a good blue-collar man with a job, or just find a black man," Some BM's have decided not to settle. They dont want to get married to the guy who's 40 yrs old and lived with mama since birth. Or the guy practicing Buidism and she's a Christian. Or the guy who's known for being a classic, well seasoned ho around town. Or the one with 3 kids by 11 baby mama's, who wants him? When he comes to your table, he brings to many ppl !
- There are few decent BM's worth dating or marrying. "...If I was only meeting one guy a year, or every few years, that wasn't going to happen." The Alabama author eventually married white. "I think a lot of black women are realizing or feeling that the pickings are slim," she said. They're made even slimmer, grumble many black women, by
- When BMs who are decent and aspire for greater attainment, become rich or famous or a certain "status", they reach for what they feel is better than their counterpart, the BW, they reach for anything NOT Black. I wanted to get married (and) have children," she said. "...high rates of successful black men choosing blondes. For some, they argue, white wives are the ultimate status symbol."
As Oprah so eloquently and ..."cautiously"...put it, "....the numbers are off. For my friends who have been waiting to date a black men, and they continue to wait, the numbers are off." 70% -75% of Black females are not married. And of the ones I KNOW that are ? Only about 2% have males that are worth it. The rest have either settled with anything (OH the DRAMA !) a few have left their husbands (even with 3 or more KIDS!!!) b/c he became to unbearable with the cheating and disrespect.
Sad.
This makes me sad too. But I think there is some truth behind it. The way black men and women seem to openly argue about the 'state of the black union/family', it sure points to us being sick and tired of each other and looking elsewhere for love.From the article:
"To a certain degree, black people are sick of each other," Alexander said. "It would be better for black men and black women to open their options."
That quote makes me really sad.
That hurt my heart when I read that. I think we're more sick of the conditions we (collectively) we continue to find our families and relationships in than of each other. Looking outside won't solve those problems. Our issues will follow us wherever we go if we don't work on ourselves.From the article:
"To a certain degree, black people are sick of each other," Alexander said. "It would be better for black men and black women to open their options."
That quote makes me really sad.
Okay, Thick. In all sincerity, who does the single black woman marry. You stated and I agree that white males are not necessarily the answer. You stated and I agree that the pool of eligible black men is shallow. Therefore, who does the single black woman marry?
This makes me sad too. But I think there is some truth behind it. The way black men and women seem to openly argue about the 'state of the black union/family', it sure points to us being sick and tired of each other and looking elsewhere for love.
I've been saying this much all along, but noooooooo, they said there are not alot of BM's like that. When in fact there are. FAR to many. They severly overwhelm the suitably postured .
You guys know I tell the truth. It's just the thruth. And Black women are so used to sticking by their men, most didnt want to admit to alot of what I've said. But hey, stick your head in the sand. Being in denial about reality have never a success make. Success in acquiring a relationship, getting married, having the kids or the white picket fence.
- Black men are QUICKER than any other race of men, to date someone outside their race. "...Nearly three quarters of the 403,000 black-white couples in 2006 involved black husbands." That means that of all the interracial marraiges, black men married to someone other than us black women, make up 75%. Now, I wonder the number of WHITE men that are married to BLACK females? Exactly. They stick by their own mostly.
- Black men have a high rate of unemployment. "....They're nearly seven times more likely to be incarcerated than white men and more than twice as likely to be unemployed." Were not talking our fathers and uncles, they came from the admirable breed. I'm talking our age BM's. To many of them are lazy and create a negative stigma on the few who accomplish and work hard. The lazy,smokin crack, watchin you're house while you're at work type is messing it up for alot of us.
- Black men are not reaching for achievement or goals. "...low rates of black men in college." "...In 2004, 26.5 percent of black males ages 18 to 24 were enrolled in college versus 36.5 percent of black women that age, according to the American Council on Education's most recent statistics." If there are 2.65 million BMs in college and 3.65 million BW's in college, that yields 1.00 million Black females without a financially compatible mate(in most cases). Thats alot of girls.....something to think about........that leads to.....
- "Black women are refusing to comply with that message about just find yourself a good blue-collar man with a job, or just find a black man," Some BM's have decided not to settle. They dont want to get married to the guy who's 40 yrs old and lived with mama since birth. Or the guy practicing Buidism and she's a Christian. Or the guy who's known for being a classic, well seasoned ho around town. Or the one with 3 kids by 11 baby mama's, who wants him? When he comes to your table, he brings to many ppl !
- There are few decent BM's worth dating or marrying. "...If I was only meeting one guy a year, or every few years, that wasn't going to happen." The Alabama author eventually married white. "I think a lot of black women are realizing or feeling that the pickings are slim," she said. They're made even slimmer, grumble many black women, by
- When BMs who are decent and aspire for greater attainment, become rich or famous or a certain "status", they reach for what they feel is better than their counterpart, the BW, they reach for anything NOT Black. I wanted to get married (and) have children," she said. "...high rates of successful black men choosing blondes. For some, they argue, white wives are the ultimate status symbol."
As Oprah so eloquently and ..."cautiously"...put it, "....the numbers are off. For my friends who have been waiting to date a black men, and they continue to wait, the numbers are off." 70% -75% of Black females are not married. And of the ones I KNOW that are ? Only about 2% have males that are worth it. The rest have either settled with anything (OH the DRAMA !) a few have left their husbands (even with 3 or more KIDS!!!) b/c he became to unbearable with the cheating and disrespect.
Sad.
It makes me sad too. What a job slavery has done to the black family.
This makes me sad too. But I think there is some truth behind it. The way black men and women seem to openly argue about the 'state of the black union/family', it sure points to us being sick and tired of each other and looking elsewhere for love.
The problem is, that argument is going strong in the white community (I believe the male-female/human relationship is in great turmoil), but yet there aren't numerous articles discussing it. The number of white women who marry has been steadily dropping, the number of white males marrying Asian females steadily increases and often the men detail the same things black men say about black women, less and less white children are born to married couples and the divorce rate is nearly at 50%, yet every time I turn around it's an article or news report on the failure of black men in regards to why blcak women should date WM and oddly enough the articles rarely seem to address the other forms of couplings (black woman/asian/latino man, etc).
Nothing wrong with interracial dating, but how about some articles addressing the solutions to the problems that are leaving black men behind. It seems like the media sometimes just likes to play up the worst part of the black community, it's only when we're divided or failing that we can get ourselves on tv.
I dont understand why people cant date and marry whoever the hell they want without all this blame game crappola. You dont need an excuse or even a reason to marry someone outside of your race, and you definitely dont need the opposite sex's issues to be your crutch.
I don't think is is healthy or productive for us to blame the demise of the black family on slavery. IMO, the last thing black people need to do is look for an excuse. We are way to good at that.
I agree that the negatives associated with blacks always receive media attention - this is the US. However, just because the issues get more media attention doesn't mean they are false. There are problems in every community. The problems in other communities do not receive the same attention. So what, we need to stop with pointing out that Todd and Becky have problems too and look at Tyrone and Ruby.
I get what you're saying.
Unfortunately slavery was not that long ago and it's a documented fact that post slavery there were very specific attempts at dividing the black family. Learned behavior passed through generations can be very hard to unlearn. When you have slaves that are tortured if they look at each other or enter relationships without the slaver owner's permission and the strongest slaves are bred together and then torn apart to sell them to various farms that can easily have an impact on later generations. Worsened by post slavery poverty, the heavy introduction of liquor and drugs into the black community, the fact that it's only been one-two generations that black ppl have had a near fair shot at an education or moving up the corporate ladder and it's easy to see why black ppl are lagging behind.
With that said I think we need to look towards the future and a solution. Any good cure, involves research of the cause of the disease, but we need to take responsibility and care enough to look for a solution.
I do not believe that black men (or women) are just born screwed up so something must be happening between birth and adulthood that explains the disparity between black and whites.
If we all care so much about the failure of black ppl esp. black men maybe we need to be as forceful with BET and the record companies as we are when a white radio personality makes a racist comment. What happened to the letter writing campaigns and boycotts of years gone past, what happened to each one, help one. Whether we like it or not we're all part of the problem.
One of my favorite Martin Luther King quotes:
The hottest place in Hell is reserved for those who remain neutral in times of great moral conflict.
S&B, I enjoy reading your posts and find agreement with many of your ideas. I am so uncomfortable with the sentiments in your posts. I don't want to argue on this beautiful Sunday morning so I will go to lunch with my friends and come back to this later.
thats Rozlips & family,a former lhcf member....
I get what you're saying.
Unfortunately slavery was not that long ago and it's a documented fact that post slavery there were very specific attempts at dividing the black family. Learned behavior passed through generations can be very hard to unlearn. When you have slaves that are tortured if they look at each other or enter relationships without the slaver owner's permission and the strongest slaves are bred together and then torn apart to sell them to various farms that can easily have an impact on later generations. Worsened by post slavery poverty, the heavy introduction of liquor and drugs into the black community, the fact that it's only been one-two generations that black ppl have had a near fair shot at an education or moving up the corporate ladder and it's easy to see why black ppl are lagging behind.
With that said I think we need to look towards the future and a solution. Any good cure, involves research of the cause of the disease, but we need to take responsibility and care enough to look for a solution.
I do not believe that black men (or women) are just born screwed up so something must be happening between birth and adulthood that explains the disparity between black and whites.
If we all care so much about the failure of black ppl esp. black men maybe we need to be as forceful with BET and the record companies as we are when a white radio personality makes a racist comment. What happened to the letter writing campaigns and boycotts of years gone past, what happened to each one, help one. Whether we like it or not we're all part of the problem. ETA for clarity: Many of us at least and I take the MLK Jr quote as a reminder for all humanity, incl. myself.
One of my favorite Martin Luther King quotes:
The hottest place in Hell is reserved for those who remain neutral in times of great moral conflict.
From the article:
"To a certain degree, black people are sick of each other," Alexander said. "It would be better for black men and black women to open their options."
That quote makes me really sad.
I do not believe that black men (or women) are just born screwed up so something must be happening between birth and adulthood that explains the disparity between black and whites.