Just because my attitude is different than yours does not make it "lax". And I'm definitely not misleading anyone, just giving my opinion on the question that was asked.
Anyway, like I said before, the people involved have to go to God themselves and see if the situation would be appropriate for them. Some people will be convicted about it, and some won't. It depends on the people and the situation. I'm not saying just because it's not in the bible it's "right", just saying that it isn't wrong across the board either.
I currently still live with a man who is not related to me. Am I sinning? Nope. I was lucky to have a family take me in when I had no other place to go. That has nothing to do with not trusting God...it's just the way the situation is. Everyone's situation is different and just because others might look on it unfavorably, doesn't mean God will.
I also agree that it is individual between those people and God
I say this because the man I was just with , Godly man (whatever that is, because he did love God but still just a man) right after we started dating all hell broke loose in his life, lost his job, fought for something like 4-5 months to get unemployment or a job, he lost his place, and had nowhere to go, I was turmoiled ALOT about the whole situation, alot of pain, but I took him in, it was not easy, but there was no sin, he wouldnt ever go there, and yes he WAS that strong, and it was all good for me anyway, because it gave me reprieve to gather myself again without that even being a worry or test or temptation, it was just understood, we aint going there. He did get on his feet, he did pay to stay here, was it stressful at times? YES , but not from temptation so much than just having someone stay with me. at times it was great , the companionship, but towards the end it was too much, again not the temptation, but the stress, so he left , and paid me up later. he was my friend for ten years on/off before this and had blessed me in the past , not sure if us staying together destroyed us or not, probably many factors, cant even say all is said and done, I just dont know, but there was no sin and he needed the help and I got BLESSED in return.
We spoke with another couple now married 26 years and have their own church and 26 years ago he had to take her in before they got married and they did not sin either
the church turned on them, she told me there is a story in the bible , cant remember who it was, where a woman stayed in a man's house before marriage , Esther? not sure
but whatever in my case, there was no sin. would I do it again though? NOPE!!!
But it was what it was and I have no regrets now
tThese are very gentle words ...
msa, I'm sorry that you were without a home. That's very unhappy place to be in life; not knowing where you are going to sleep in peace, let alone live.
I feel sad for both of you. The two of you had some very sensitive situations. As much as it seems right, we cannot confuse God's compassion and call it His permission. There is a major difference; a difference where we all as Christians have to be cautious of . If we don't, we'll live a life of compromise and make excuses for one thing after another, which we know is not right.
These living situations no matter how 'right' they seem to you, are not right to God. These are human decisions which both of you made as a result of human errors. God did not create the situations that lead to where you are; neither did He lead you to the decisions you made. These are your human choices, not His.
Irresistable, you were not responsible for your friend. God would not have set you up like that. As women, we tend to use the scenerio of events, to justify why we step in to help a man. The reason is that we care about him. Period! It was still not your responsibility to let him live with you. One prayer, "God please provide for him, to keep us from sin', would have solved it.
When something is wrong, it's wrong. God is not schizophrenic, He doesn't waver from one decision to another. He is fixed, completely and totally established in what He says and He is faithful to His word, eternally. How else can He be called faithful, trustworthy? He would not be God if He did not uphold His word or His integrety.
Over and Over, this fact will never change, that each of your situations are a result from a human decision, not God's. His 'allowing' these situations is only of His Mercies upon us; it is simply Him not overriding your free will.
When we're in trouble, our emotions take over and we will do whatever seems right to us at that time. There seems to be no other solution, yet God still has not changed. The 'peace' that one feels is not because God approves, it is because He cannot get through to you at this point of your decision. Yet God does not 'allow' us to stay there. It's not His will neither from the onset or the duration of the situation.
So many have fallen because of their 'human decisions'. In God's word, there is one example after another. God made His instructions quite clear to King Saul, yet Saul yielded to his human decision and lost his peace with God.
Sarah made a human decision which has cost the lives of multiple millions, even up to this day.
Esau made a human decision which changed the order of his birthright.
Today's war in the Middle East would not be if if were not for these two who made a very critical human decision.
Neither of you can say that God lead you to this. And it is dangerous for either of you to share this as a testimony, to 'prove' that you were able to this way and not succomb to temptation. That's misleading as a witness to Christ. Others will follow thinking because you did it, they can too. It's dangerously leading other Christians to 'flirt with temptation'.
This is totally against the will of God. For it will in turn go against what God has proclaimed. That He leads us
not into temptation; and delivers us from evil. God does not play games. He does not 'dangle' sin in front of us to tempt us, satan does that, not God.
Christians do not live as the world does. We do not have to. There is always another way which is God's way. Even when we 'think' there isn't. When our emotions are caught up, it opens the door for satan to very cleaverly come in and lead us astray.
None of 'us' can afford to say God 's approval was in this; for we be responsible for others, lead to do the same, leading them to fall; for it is truly a dangerous trap for a sexual encounter outside of marriage waiting to happen.
You know, sometimes women allow themselves into this because they want so much to have the presence of a man in their lives. Men are just that good to be around. There is a wonderful 'difference' about the presence of a man in our home. Some women allow this, for it's the closest they feel that they will ever come to living with a man.
The bottomline is whenever we are in trouble, and the immediate solution of a situation is not 'ideal', we know it's not of God. It is a human decision that we have His grace and mercies upon.
God does not approve of these living arrangements. That's not His plan for our lives. We can't whitewash it; we have to admit this not only to ourselves, but to Him so that He can deliver us into His Perfect Plan.
This is not a lecture neither a put down. It's an embrace from the heart of God for each of His daughters.
The two of you deserve so much better. :Rose: