Make the guy want to chase you...

[HoneyA]

I found this article here http://www.mikethemasterdater.com/2008/12/23/getting-the-guy-you-want-to-chase-you/
It's written by a man. I thought it was hilariousbut it makes the dating game so clear. It's good to get a man's perspective. No matter what people say, it is a game and you got to learn to play it properly. You have to let the man you want chase you and let him be a man, that's just the way it is. Keep it moving and you keep him on his toes. He'll either step up to the plate or fade out.

Enjoy ladies!

Make the guy want to chase you

When I was younger I would look at women as an aloof untouchable race that HAD to be captured. They were such a strange prey! They didn’t know whether they liked being chased or not. After a hunt I would get together with my hunting buddies and talk about the conquest. The one that just barely escaped or the one that turned and attacked! It was as if we were in an ancient lodge smoking cigars and cleaning our shotguns instead of being at the high school lunch table .

I have a bit of a hobby I like really nutty girls. Stalker? Where!? Is she hot!?? One of the first times I realized I liked the crazy ones was when I had a Brazilian girl get my number “for a friend”. She was sitting with her boyfriend and it seemed innocent enough. Then the texts started to come and soon got a little suspicious. I was a bit surprised that she was texting me since I knew her boyfriend! I mean we weren’t the closest of friends but still! Fortunately, I knew right away what she was up to and I didn’t play. She wanted me to chase her… She was wagging her little deer tail, just dying for me to shoot her. Now most deer run away once they realize the hunter does not have any desire to kill them. But not this one. She wagged her little white tail some more, backed up a little closer to me. Wagged again, walked a little closer, gave me a funny look that said “are you a fricken hunter or what?”

When a woman lets it slip that she wants me to chase her I can’t help but see to what lengths she will go. This is where the crazies come in, they don’t sense what is inappropriate. They run in, charge the hunter, knock him down bounce on his chest while screaming “shoot me! Damn it Shooooot meee!!!” I get so much inner glee to see the role reversal.

I had an epiphany once in early college after another one of these crazy girl attacks. The epiphany may not seem like a big deal but for a guy it was shocking. Sitting in front of the TV with a beer in hand it just came to me! All these years I had been thinking that I was getting the girl but finally I realized that I was being gotten. WHOA… Wait a sec, my brain froze for a little while as something so incredibly obvious peeled open. It was almost as if I realized for the first time there was a connection between urinating and fluid intake. I thought how is that possible?? I mean it was obvious but so baffling, why didn’t I get it sooner? Why would I be blinded to the fact that the deer actually wanted to be chased and shot??? That somehow I was duped into thinking that I was the only one in control.
Guys are strange critters, we are smart but are very dominated by our drives. Chasing the opposite sex is so deeply ingrained in our minds that it is like a dog chasing a cat. The dog may really be bright but the minute that cat runs, evolution takes over and he MUST run it down.

So as a woman how do you get a particular guy to chase you? This is sometimes a bit tough. Imagine the dog again, he is in a room full of cats which one should he chase? Some dogs have learned that he cannot chase all of the cats at the same time. Some of the cats don’t run and therefore are no fun to chase. Some cats chase dogs and this is really confusing! Some cats, scratch and bite, they are fun to chase but not so fun later. Which one to go after??

You as the cat liked to be chased but you can never let the dog know that (but usually he is too stupid to get it). So you tease the dog, you excite him a bit, be playful, hide, play with other dogs, scratch him, piss him off and finally when he is at his peak RUN! He will chase you and will have the satisfaction that when he catches you and eats you as if it were entirely his idea.

• You are not a dog you are a cat! Dogs don’t like to be chased by cats!
• It is far more attractive to the guy to think he is in control, so let him believe it
• To be the cat he chases you must be different than the other cats
• If he does not want to shoot you for GOD SAKES move on to another hunter
• The most attractive prey is the one that is also the most challenging

 

[kismettt]

i do not enjoy being compared to a cat

& it rubs me the wrong way to see a man compared to a dog

=/

 

[She-Ra]

Though..? I have to admit that he did write a humorous article - I'm very visual so it was a fun read and I consider the some of the logic to be true. Not only for men but people in general. It's very easy to take for granted what comes easy with lack of motivation and creative/emotional ties. I think chasing isn't simply a man's game but a human thing. Even a saint has to have reason to be good.

 

[chickle]

Thanks me and my friend were talking about this the other day. I don't like playing games, and I am very honest, and I am currently talking to this guy. She is trying to teach me how to be "not so desperate", lol, but how is being honest desperate. So instead of saying something like "Oh, I think you are cute", I am suppose to say "you iight".

 

[Bunny77]

Thanks me and my friend were talking about this the other day. I don't like playing games, and I am very honest, and I am currently talking to this guy. She is trying to teach me how to be "not so desperate", lol, but how is being honest desperate. So instead of saying something like "Oh, I think you are cute", I am suppose to say "you iight".

What is your definition of "playing games?"

As for being honest, I wouldn't say "Oh, I think you're cute," or "you aiight." I wouldn't say anything. Let him compliment you first. I never tell some dude I'm just "talking to" how much I'm into him... nah...

 

[TLC1020]

It is always good to hear a man perspective especially when it involves a man. Grant it sometimes what men say sound humorous but in reality men do play games and if you are going to play with him then you better play to win or else your feelings will get hurt.

 

[HoneyA]

I knew there would be some who say they are just not into playing games. I used to say that too. Sometimes I'll refer to it as a dance because it sounds better. I saw a post somewhere on the relationship forum that said "do nothing, smile, accept some call and dates" or something to that effect. I can't remember who it was but that is in essence what the dance or game is all about.
All I have to say is that it's more fun this way. Whether you are being compared to a cat, prey or a dancing partner, it's the same thing. I have heard my guy friends say that they do not like to be chased by any woman. Bottom line is be a challenge.

 

[frizzy]

Funny article! He told the truth and desperation is a negative. Ladies need to take back the power we possess.

 

[Livingmylifetothefullest]

Interesting article but anything written by a man is interesting in my book

 

[jamaica68]

Interesting article, he made some valid points.

 

[Bmack]

It is always good to hear a man perspective especially when it involves a man. Grant it sometimes what men say sound humorous but in reality men do play games and if you are going to play with him then you better play to win or else your feelings will get hurt.

this is so true, but why do u think this is. Why do men play games? I mean what is the point.

Today, my friend called to express some drama over a fool she said "kick rocks" to, but just as soon as she stoped calling and left him with a hard on lol(literally) he is all over her, calling off the chain and breaking about why she is not returning his calls.... long story short when she started calling again, homeboy is acting brand new again. She is not even bothered as her feelings for dude have faded....I dont get it though.

 

[HoneyA]

this is so true, but why do u think this is. Why do men play games? I mean what is the point.

Today, my friend called to express some drama over a fool she said "kick rocks" to, but just as soon as she stoped calling and left him with a hard on lol(literally) he is all over her, calling off the chain and breaking about why she is not returning his calls.... long story short when she started calling again, homeboy is acting brand new again. She is not even bothered as her feelings for dude have faded....I dont get it though.

I really do think it is human nature to want what we can't have though. I think it goes both ways to tell the truth. When she started calling, she was no longer a challenge. Maybe she started back too soon. Goes right back to just chilling, doing nothing and being unavailable at times. The key is attraction and acting desperate kills attraction for a man, plain and simple.

 

[Bmack]

I really do think it is human nature to want what we can't have though. I think it goes both ways to tell the truth. When she started calling, she was no longer a challenge. Maybe she started back too soon. Goes right back to just chilling, doing nothing and being unavailable at times. The key is attraction and acting desperate kills attraction for a man, plain and simple.

Thats the thing, she was not being desperate lol she just would return his call lol... However, I do think ur right. She probably started back too soon.

 

[metro_qt]

What is your definition of "playing games?"

As for being honest, I wouldn't say "Oh, I think you're cute," or "you aiight." I wouldn't say anything. Let him compliment you first. I never tell some dude I'm just "talking to" how much I'm into him... nah...

That's EXACTLY what i was about to say.
I usually let the man say it first, so I can gauge where they're coming from, and then i'm like THAAAANK YOU so much!!!! You're real cute too! Yes. big cheesy grin. lol they eat it up!

 

[metro_qt]

Also, to add,
aren't animals... especially predatory ones *known* to play games with their prey before they eat them?

Think of this article snippet could be applied to Men 'Chasing' Women:

A cat will “play” with her prey to tire it out in order to reduce the risk of injury to herself, but she is not actually playing in the human sense. She is simply doing the job that her instincts tell her she must do in order not to starve, and protecting herself in the process. If the prey is lively, the cat could suffer a serious bite that might become infected and lead to death. Only when the prey is sufficiently tired and dazed is the cat able to make the kill.

Sometimes a cat will appear to lose interest when the prey becomes still but then leap upon it as soon as it moves. This gives the appearance that the cat is toying with the poor creature, but this is just the cat’s way of ensuring that the prey is sufficiently dazed to safely finish it off. If she attempts to finish things too quickly, she could risk failure or serious injury

Read more at Suite101: Why Cats Play with Their Prey: Felines Release and Recapture Animals to Avoid Injury http://cats.suite101.com/article.cfm/why_cats_play_with_their_prey#ixzz0kBBYuyQ5

Lol, Just like the Cat, a human man does NOT want to fail at anything...

 

[JFemme]

Also, to add,
aren't animals... especially predatory ones *known* to play games with their prey before they eat them?

Think of this article snippet could be applied to Men 'Chasing' Women:

A cat will “play” with her prey to tire it out in order to reduce the risk of injury to herself, but she is not actually playing in the human sense. She is simply doing the job that her instincts tell her she must do in order not to starve, and protecting herself in the process. If the prey is lively, the cat could suffer a serious bite that might become infected and lead to death. Only when the prey is sufficiently tired and dazed is the cat able to make the kill.

Sometimes a cat will appear to lose interest when the prey becomes still but then leap upon it as soon as it moves. This gives the appearance that the cat is toying with the poor creature, but this is just the cat’s way of ensuring that the prey is sufficiently dazed to safely finish it off. If she attempts to finish things too quickly, she could risk failure or serious injury

Read more at Suite101: Why Cats Play with Their Prey: Felines Release and Recapture Animals to Avoid Injury http://cats.suite101.com/article.cfm/why_cats_play_with_their_prey#ixzz0kBBYuyQ5

thanking you....

I really enjoyed reading this....

 

[JewelleNY]

IDK, sounds like playing games to me

Seems like if a guy like you, he likes you. If a guy loses interest when you start showing interest than it was all about the chase and not you.

The guy sounds like a college student

 

[Bmack]

IDK, sounds like playing games to me

Seems like if a guy like you, he likes you. If a guy loses interest when you start showing interest than it was all about the chase and not you.

The guy sounds like a college student

That is exactly it. I am so happy I am married and I seriously cant remember my DH behaving like this.

I can understand a women not behaving like she is starved and even waiting for a guy to express interest, but damn lol. With that said the guy my friend is dealing with is about 50...I am glad she is like blah

 

[chickle]

What is your definition of "playing games?"

As for being honest, I wouldn't say "Oh, I think you're cute," or "you aiight." I wouldn't say anything. Let him compliment you first. I never tell some dude I'm just "talking to" how much I'm into him... nah...

To be honest, I would never be all over a guy telling him, "your cute", unless he asked. I just prefer to tell a guy where I stand on things. My definition of playing games, is stuff like waiting three days to call him, and declining to go on a date if he ask simply because "its in the rule book". If I want to call him, I will call. That being said, I am not a clingy person and have never been described as being desperate, until my friend told me I was desperate for telling him that it was nice to see him.

 

[Guitarhero]

He will chase you and will have the satisfaction that when he catches you and eats you as if it were entirely his idea.

• You are not a dog you are a cat! Dogs don’t like to be chased by cats!
• It is far more attractive to the guy to think he is in control, so let him believe it
• To be the cat he chases you must be different than the other cats
• If he does not want to shoot you for GOD SAKES move on to another hunter
• The most attractive prey is the one that is also the most challenging

Um, this kind of guy wouldn't know that when he got married, he needed to become human, not stay a dogg.

 

[Bunny77]

To be honest, I would never be all over a guy telling him, "your cute", unless he asked. I just prefer to tell a guy where I stand on things. My definition of playing games, is stuff like waiting three days to call him, and declining to go on a date if he ask simply because "its in the rule book". If I want to call him, I will call. That being said, I am not a clingy person and have never been described as being desperate, until my friend told me I was desperate for telling him that it was nice to see him.

Okay, that makes sense. And I don't think you were desperate at all by saying it was nice to see him. That's just polite.

I do think there's a line between playing games (in the way you described) and reasonably maintaining a sense of challenge in the dating process. I think many women can be too open in the early stages and too quick to tell a man "where they stand." Most times, they don't need to know all that. You don't have to be all suspicious and secretive, but women can be too much of an open book WAY too early, and that causes problems.

However, I like what Metro QT said about ways you can encourage his interest and basically show him that you're interested without just being all out there with it.

If a man just was flat out honest and open really early into the talking/dating period, we would get creeped out and think he was moving too fast. It's the same way vice-versa.

 

[Filmatic]

I don't care for all that chasing and I don't like men who are all about a chase. It bores me. Either I like you or a I don't. No amount of chasing me will get me. My disinterest is not a challenge.

Now I won't go out of my way to tell some dude how I feel first. I'm a private person so I like others to tell me first.

 

[HoneyA]

Though..? I have to admit that he did write a humorous article - I'm very visual so it was a fun read and I consider the some of the logic to be true. Not only for men but people in general. It's very easy to take for granted what comes easy with lack of motivation and creative/emotional ties. I think chasing isn't simply a man's game but a human thing. Even a saint has to have reason to be good.

I'm really visual too so that's why to me it was hilarious. I remember walking home one evening. I spotted a cat in the distance and there was a dog behind me with its owner but without a leash. Occasionally it ran ahead of me. The cat was minding its own business doing its own thing and so was the dog. Then the two spotted each other. They both froze and stared at each other for what seemed like ages. Neither made a move. I stopped walking to watch, very intrigued. In my head I was like "Cat, run!". Then suddenly the cat turned around and sped off and the dog sped off behind it and the owner of the dog started shouting. Chaos ensued...I remembered that as I read the text.

. I think many women can be too open in the early stages and too quick to tell a man "where they stand." Most times, they don't need to know all that.

And bingo, all there is to it really...

 

[JollyGal]

What is your definition of "playing games?"

As for being honest, I wouldn't say "Oh, I think you're cute," or "you aiight." I wouldn't say anything. Let him compliment you first. I never tell some dude I'm just "talking to" how much I'm into him... nah...

This! It is hard to not say too much but once you resist the urge you will create an air of mystery around and fascination (a bit cheesy but there you go ). I think playing games is a term bestowed upon women by lazy men. I wonder where the origins of "playing games" came from?

 

[JollyGal]

Though..? I have to admit that he did write a humorous article - I'm very visual so it was a fun read and I consider the some of the logic to be true. Not only for men but people in general. It's very easy to take for granted what comes easy with lack of motivation and creative/emotional ties. I think chasing isn't simply a man's game but a human thing. Even a saint has to have reason to be good.

This is such a wonderful sentence. You're so right

 

[keysha1983]

I love the article. Every relationship I noticed that men love the thrill of the hunt.

 

[Bunny77]

This! It is hard to not say too much but once you resist the urge you will create an air of mystery around and fascination (a bit cheesy but there you go ). I think playing games is a term bestowed upon women by lazy men. I wonder where the origins of "playing games" came from?

I agree with this! I notice that the men who are most likely to accuse women of "playing games" usually are the men who enjoy sowing their wild oats with as many women as possible. But if a woman suddenly wants to make him work to get her, instead of doing so, he'll say, "Oh she's playing games."

No, she's setting a standard for herself as to how she expects to be treated. These types of men don't like it when they feel that the power is NOT in their hands.

So, it's only playing games when THEY aren't in control.

 

[HoneyA]

I really think we as women need to chill out and let the guy come to us. That way we'll see if he's serious about us or not. If he's not, he'll fade out because he did not put in the work to keep our attention. Not a big deal because there are more where he came from. All of the posts on the RF where women are in happy relationships with their SOs and especially the happily married women here say the same thing. The man pursued and he did not give up the chase even though they made it difficult. Some women might have made the first move but after that, it was up to the man. All of these happily attached women cannot be wrong.

 

[DayStar]

How about initiating conversation? Is it okay for a women to if she likes a guy?

 

[HoneyA]

How about initiating conversation? Is it okay for a women to iF she likes a guy?

I think that's harmless enough because that's not chasing. It could turn into chasing when women somehow convince themselves they should keep initiating every conversation.