Is my stylist a hater??

Treasure2k6

Treasure2k6

New Member
I called my stylist this morning and told her about the wonderful things that are happening to my hair with MTG and Vitamins. I also told her about the vitamins I have been taking MSM, GNC Multi's, and my fluid intake. So....I emailed her pics to show her my progress since August. She SNAPPED ON ME!!

She said, "You think that your hair is getting full and thick because of MTG, thats made for animals....its simply your hair getting alot of build up making it appear to be thick. I am sure its making your cuticles puffy." ...Now, I also sent her pics of my new growth. The only thing she told me was that, my hair wasn't as long as it should be because I haven't been coming to her as often as I use to. To top it off, I told her about the way I have been trying to maintain my ends while the highlights are still breaking off. I told her that my new head of hair is very strong, and its only a small amount of the hightlights still there. I guess she got offended because she did my hightlights about 6 months ago, and felt that I was saying my hair was breaking because of her!!

I don't even feel comfortable with going back to her after that. I mean, its like she thinks I don't have the right to learn things on my own and care of my own hair.

LHCF Sisters, should I just brush it off, and continue allowing her to style my hair once a month??
 
I think that you should take care of your hair until you feel that is in a very healthy state. Oh well if she is a hater. Alot of people do not understand the LHCF knowledge and Im tired of wasting my breathe. People doubt me when I say I growing my hair to near BSL and its like I hear crickets when I talk. Get a steady regimen and take care of your ends and your hair will grow to lengths you never seen before. Once you get to your hair goal it is nice to treat yourself to a monthly or biweekly hair salon visit(BYOP bring your own products) Find a highly recomended hair dresser that you can trust even if you gotta scope her out before you sit in her seat.
 
Wow, I'm sorry to hear that she had such negative things to say to you :( That's the reason not many people outside of my boyfriend and one of my friends know what I do with my hair. I wouldn't go to her but that's just me. Is there anybody else you can go to?
 
Hi I think she is a hater because it's like she does not want you to learn how to take care of your own hair because all stylist that have been to their hair is not healthy at all I think that we as women should know how to care for your own hair
 
I think she was way too strong in her wording, but I look at it this way:

She went to school for this. She is considered a hair care expert in her state by law. Based on your post, you basically said that x,y,z, none of which were from the professional's own doing, were the reasons your hair grew so much.

No professional or expert I know of in any profession likes to feel like their expertise is useless or obsolete. I know that as a marketing professional, when people basically tell me anyone can do my job, it does get my hackles up a bit.

I remember that the first time I mentioned to my great-aunt (who was my stylist for YEARS and kept my hair in tip-top shape) that I was doing CW only, she really looked at me sideways, and suggested that I find a shampoo appropriately PH-balanced for my hair. After that, I decided not to mention that tips and tools I've learned from the hair boards to hair stylists. My former stylist/best friend offered to wash/style my hair, but after looking at her products, I realized they all had cones, so I politely declined rather than giving her the curly gurl manifesto. Now, she does know that I follow a different routine than her relaxed patrons, so sometimes she has them talk to me about wearing naturally coily hair, since I've spent more time studying it. But out of respect, I also don't ram my newfound knowledge about hair care down her throat. Next time I want her to do my hair, I'll just bring my own products and leave it at that.

If you don't feel comfortable, don't go back to her, but with your next stylist, maybe keep your success stories a little closer to the vest.
 
What do your instincts tell you? You know your results are real. Do you think she is the type that would damage your hair to prove herself right?
 
I read your post about 3 times. I can't imagine telling anyone other than folks on the board about all the stuff I do for my hair. I was wondering if this was someone you were really close to like...she's a FRIEND who happened to be your stylist or is she your stylist first?

Either way, I'm not sure exactly what you thought her reaction would or should be. It just is what it is. Take what you know now and do what you need to do with that.

We live and learn, IMHO.
 
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Just curious. Why did you send her pics and tell her so much about what you are doing? I guess you're starting to learn that most of what we do here is not well recepted or respected by others.

I don't think she's a hater, just offended. :ohwell: I'm sorry your experience wasn't pleasant, but based on most LHCF'ers experiences, her reaction is the norm for many stylists.
 
She sounds like a stylists who wants you to be totally dependent on her. I would ask myself is she really that great? If not, then do some research. Call different places in town and find a stylist who shares in your philosophies on healthy hair maintenance. Of course I don't know many stylists who would endorse MTG but I am sure your frustrations with her go far beyond that.
 
I agree with some of the other posters that she may be just a tad bit offended because even though you have been going to her for a while, here you are telling her about all this that YOU did and the great growth and she's probably thinking :confused: ? Congratulations on your growth and your progress, but I think you know the answer for yourself. As for me, if her words had been as strong as you said they were, I'd be afraid to go back and sit in her chair anytime soon (shoo, who am I fooling?......not again)

More than likely, if you do go back, she'll be able to see the progress for herself but instead of giving you your props and encouraging you, you may have to sit there and endure the long sermons about what you shouldn't be doing to your hair. Then she will prob. go on to tell you about how you need to keep your appts. and stay in her shop regularly, etc. May even look at your hair and tell you there is damage. You want to pay to hear this??

Follow your first mind, and congrats again!!
 
Like it has been said before, you have to be careful of who you talk to or how much information you give. Most people will look at "us" like we are crazy.

As for going back to her I would not. I wouldn't trust her not to mess up my progress after the comments that she made.
 
There's alot to be said about keeping certain things to yourself. :ohwell:

I wouldn't go back to her now...you basically threw all your new found knowledge in her face and probably made her feel pretty dumb and put her on the offensive.

There are quite a few people in the world who don't want to hear or accept alot of the things we discuss on this board. Your stylist is one of them.
 
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I agree with the ladies that have already posted. Her professional ego may be bruised, she may want to keep you dependant on her as a stylist. Notice that everything she said to you was negative.

If you continue to go to her I think you should be careful. Your hard work may get sabotaged.

Softresses
 
Enchantmt said:
What do your instincts tell you? You know your results are real. Do you think she is the type that would damage your hair to prove herself right?
Click to expand...

That's exactly what I was thinking. I would hate to see your progress setback because she wants to be right.
 
kitchen_tician said:
Just curious. Why did you send her pics and tell her so much about what you are doing? I guess you're starting to learn that most of what we do here is not well recepted or respected by others.

I don't think she's a hater, just offended. :ohwell: I'm sorry your experience wasn't pleasant, but based on most LHCF'ers experiences, her reaction is the norm for many stylists.
Click to expand...

I agree with Kitchen.

Go with your gut on going back to her. I dont tell everyone about what I do to my hair either. I have some people who understand and other who think I am 'too serious' about it. (people who say...it dont take all that!) When I get the real strange looks......I just keep it simple and very basic.
 
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Treasure2k6 said:
I called my stylist this morning and told her about the wonderful things that are happening to my hair with MTG and Vitamins. I also told her about the vitamins I have been taking MSM, GNC Multi's, and my fluid intake. So....I emailed her pics to show her my progress since August. She SNAPPED ON ME!!

She said, "You think that your hair is getting full and thick because of MTG, thats made for animals....its simply your hair getting alot of build up making it appear to be thick. I am sure its making your cuticles puffy." ...Now, I also sent her pics of my new growth. The only thing she told me was that, my hair wasn't as long as it should be because I haven't been coming to her as often as I use to. To top it off, I told her about the way I have been trying to maintain my ends while the highlights are still breaking off. I told her that my new head of hair is very strong, and its only a small amount of the hightlights still there. I guess she got offended because she did my hightlights about 6 months ago, and felt that I was saying my hair was breaking because of her!!

I don't even feel comfortable with going back to her after that. I mean, its like she thinks I don't have the right to learn things on my own and care of my own hair.

LHCF Sisters, should I just brush it off, and continue allowing her to style my hair once a month??
Click to expand...

I couldn't even contain myself long enough to read everyone elses' responses. I can't stand people like her! I would not go back to her unless you are ready to do battle over how you want your hair taken care of. She sounds like a hater and like she might get scissor happy with your hair or overprocess it to "show" you that what you are doing wasn't working. Her comments and attitude make me nervous. I would be very careful.
 
This reminds me of when I first started my hair care journey back in April. Just before I found this board, I bought Cathy Howse's book and read it. A week later, I went to get my hair done and mentioned to my (ex) hairdresser about how the book says that brushing your hair isn't good, that it will pull it out, and her reaction was typical, she thought that was the stupidest thing she's ever heard. I realized then that if I told her what else I had been learning, she'd have the same negative reaction.

I totally agree with the other ladies. Your hairdresser's ego is probably bruised, but after the harsh and negative words she gave you, I wouldn't go near her.
 
i think you have to be selective with the people you decide to share you hair care practices with

most methods mentioned on this board go against many peoples beliefs regarding hair care

a stylist being a trained licensed professional will not accept most of the methods practiced on this board

it's just like how many medical doctors dismiss uncoventional treaments for diseases, it goes against everything they were taught

i don't think your stylist is being a hater, her reaction was not out of the ordinary

if i were you i would find a new stylist, you offended her and she just may take it out on your hair

unless your next stylist is a lhcf member don't share your regimine with him/her
 
Here's my .02,

Why not speak with her again, if it's bothering you. It was her opinion. Sometimes people can't admit that they are wrong or that there's other ways to do things.

So with that said, if you just love the way she does your hair, and perhaps if you've had a long history of "successfully working together", maybe you'll want to get past it.

Best Wishes
 
I wouldn't even talk to her again unless she was already your friend. She doesn't seem to respect what you are trying to achieve. I went to cosmotolgy school and I don't really recall learning how to care for hair to make it grow. You learn the science about hair and basic hair applications and techniques to achieve different types of hairstyles. You don't learn how to grow hair. That is something that a stylist would have to research on her/his own. You don't learn everything there is to know about hair care in school. That's why stylists have to continue to get additional training to stay informed and current. Don't feel bad about your hair success and don't go back to her ever again. Love her from a distance!
 
shortdub78 said:
I wouldn't even talk to her again unless she was already your friend. She doesn't seem to respect what you are trying to achieve. I went to cosmotolgy school and I don't really recall learning how to care for hair to make it grow. You learn the science about hair and basic hair applications and techniques to achieve different types of hairstyles. You don't learn how to grow hair. That is something that a stylist would have to research on her/his own. You don't learn everything there is to know about hair care in school. That's why stylists have to continue to get additional training to stay informed and current. Don't feel bad about your hair success and don't go back to her ever again. Love her from a distance!
Click to expand...

This is a really honest post and I want you to know that it's appreciated! :yep:
 
Hater!!! I wouldn't go back

I don't share too much of what i do with anyone because i don't think they would understand.

a friend of mine saw me with a baggie on my head and was like? what da heck is that? told her and she kinda brushed it off.

So you know what? if i got anything to say or ask anybody, I will come on here or any other hair board i frequent.


:dance7:

sg
 
I have not read through the other responses yet, but I had to respond right away (I feel strongly about this subject) I decided to do my own hair after wearing braids for a long period of time. When I told a couple of stylist what I wanted to do regarding protective styling, etc. they shot all my ideas down. I can not pay someone my hard earned money and feel like I can't talk to them about the head that's been on MY shoulders since I showed up on this planet. I respect the fact that they went to school, etc etc but at least listen to me. So I vote with my feet and my $$$.

I'm empowered by this site and the women here. My hair would not be in the wonderful condition that it is now if I didn't take charge. Knowledge is power, this site is power. I don't have to play the victim or the submissive role with my hair any more. And like someone else said on the board, if I '***' my own head up, I would feel better about it than if I paid someone to '***' it up!

Just .02 from the peanut gallery!


Treasure2k6 said:
I called my stylist this morning and told her about the wonderful things that are happening to my hair with MTG and Vitamins. I also told her about the vitamins I have been taking MSM, GNC Multi's, and my fluid intake. So....I emailed her pics to show her my progress since August. She SNAPPED ON ME!!

She said, "You think that your hair is getting full and thick because of MTG, thats made for animals....its simply your hair getting alot of build up making it appear to be thick. I am sure its making your cuticles puffy." ...Now, I also sent her pics of my new growth. The only thing she told me was that, my hair wasn't as long as it should be because I haven't been coming to her as often as I use to. To top it off, I told her about the way I have been trying to maintain my ends while the highlights are still breaking off. I told her that my new head of hair is very strong, and its only a small amount of the hightlights still there. I guess she got offended because she did my hightlights about 6 months ago, and felt that I was saying my hair was breaking because of her!!

I don't even feel comfortable with going back to her after that. I mean, its like she thinks I don't have the right to learn things on my own and care of my own hair.

LHCF Sisters, should I just brush it off, and continue allowing her to style my hair once a month??
Click to expand...
 
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Kimberly said:
I read your post about 3 times. I can't imagine telling anyone other than folks on the board about all the stuff I do for my hair. I was wondering if this was someone you were really close to like...she's a FRIEND who happened to be your stylist or is she your stylist first?

Either way, I'm not sure exactly what you thought her reaction would or should be. It just is what it is. Take what you know now and do what you need to do with that.

We live and learn, IMHO.
Click to expand...
These were my exact thoughts also. I don't tell everybody what I do especially not someone who's doing something to my hair. I'll tell her small things but most things I keep to myself.
 
I am so sorry to hear that, I really think it depends on how comfortable you feel going back. For me, I would probably sever those ties and move on. I mean it was rude and wrong for her to lash out at you no matter if those were her true feelings. Ultimately, you will have to decide, but I mean someone who should be helping you maintain your hair should congratulate your progress.
 
I would NEVER tell a hair stylist about my hair care. They just don't understand. I don't even tell my family what I do to my hair.
 
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