StrawberryQueen
Well-Known Member
Your answers are cute!BlkOnyx488 said:
I'm just gonna do it: Who's married to a white man?
- Thread starter UmSumayyah
- Start date
DarkAngell
Well-Known Member
InnerSoul said:
my feelings exactly
UmSumayyah
Well-Known Member
camellia said:1. Are you married to a white dude? Yes.
2. How did you meet? He was leaving Burger King and I was across the street waiting for a bus.
3. Are you more attractive than your "average bear"--I mean black woman? I'm average. He thinks I'm gorgeous and I guess that's what counts.
4. Are you financially successful and/or have a prestigious career/education? We own a couple of businesses and are relatively successful. I'd say we're financially "comfortable".
5. Is he attractive? (and not just to you) Yes.
We met when I was still in high school. He begged me to marry him for almost two years before I gave in.
LMBO at Camellia saying she's "average."
As Blosssom would say: HA!
gone_fishing
New Member
UmSumayyah said:
Well, I'm not sure if this is a serious thread or not but I can't vote. I've been married before but to a black man (for six years) and I won't be marrying the current beau until next summer. We'll be getting hitched here: http://www.naplesbeachhotel.com/resort/catering/weddings.htm
1. No, but will be.
2. Through a mutual friend. He expressed an interest in me and approached me and we exchanged contact information. We talked for a little while and then went on a date. We've been together ever since.
3. Geez. I don't know. Probably not. I'm pretty average. I don't have Beyonce's abs or J Lo's booty. I don't have Amerie's hair or Halle's cheek bones. So I stick with "I'm average" but my baby loves me. Anyway, you can look at my slideshow and you be the judge.
4. I am secure but there's nothing prestigous about my job. I'm a paralegal. Not a big shot or anything like that.
5. Well...guess you'd have to be the judge of that too.
So this is him:
http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j131/ataurus1/ryangolf-1.jpghttp://s79.photobucket.com/albums/j131/ataurus1/?action=view¤t=ryangolf-1.jpg
http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j131/ataurus1/pool.jpg
http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j131/ataurus1/tealcouch.jpg
http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j131/ataurus1/Cruise%202007/IMG_0275.jpg
Is this thread being facetious? I answered it sincerely but I don't want our relationship to be the butt of some joke
Last edited:
Maa Maa omo mti
New Member
adequate where do you live and does he have a brother, cousin, friend, someone for a single young sister like me? 
UmSumayyah
Well-Known Member
adequate said:
I was not making fun of interracial marriages as my dh aka "The Best Husband in the Whole Wide World" is white.
Here's the backstory: someone posted a link to Evia's blog at http://www.bfinterracialmarriage.blogspot.com. One of our newest members at the time said the site was very "sad" because the VAST majority of black women couldn't possibly hope to marry a good white guy. Because all the best, rich, prestigious, blah and blah white guys would never go for most of them. Flames ensue because the poster making the assertion was a self-professed "Vanessa Williams look-alike" married to a white neurosurgeon.
She is told that some women here are married to white men and directed to older threads. The response was that those threads asked about SOs and not husbands, because white men will sleep with you but not--
oh forget it, it's quicker for me to find the applicable threads and bump them.
Quty_Bug
Member
1. Are you married to a white dude? Will be in June 2008
2. How did you meet? I went to lunch with a male friend and he brought him along. I thought he "talked" cute. I'm a weirdo I know, and we became really good friends and one thing just lead to another.
3. Are you more attractive than your "average bear"--I mean black woman? I think i'm a cutey...
4. Are you financially successful and/or have a prestigious career/education? We are both active duty military (enlisted), I have a bachelors in Social Psychology and I am financially secure, no debt and I save and invest.
5. Is he attractive? (and not just to you) I think he is, but most would call us an odd looking couple because he is like 12 years older than me. I'm 25 he's 37. He treats me like a queen and even supports me LHCF addiction.
2. How did you meet? I went to lunch with a male friend and he brought him along. I thought he "talked" cute. I'm a weirdo I know, and we became really good friends and one thing just lead to another.
3. Are you more attractive than your "average bear"--I mean black woman? I think i'm a cutey...
4. Are you financially successful and/or have a prestigious career/education? We are both active duty military (enlisted), I have a bachelors in Social Psychology and I am financially secure, no debt and I save and invest.
5. Is he attractive? (and not just to you) I think he is, but most would call us an odd looking couple because he is like 12 years older than me. I'm 25 he's 37. He treats me like a queen and even supports me LHCF addiction.
gone_fishing
New Member
abenyo said:adequate where do you live and does he have a brother, cousin, friend, someone for a single young sister like me?
I'm in Charlotte. He has lots of single friends and a really ummm beautiful brother in Wisconsin. I haven't met him in person but I've seen pictures and wooo he's a hottie. But, he has a girlfriend.
I'm gonna tell his momma she should have made more of them.
gone_fishing
New Member
UmSumayyah said:
ok! i see! It sounds like SHE was just trying to stir up problems. I guess there comes a point when you have to ignore but it's HARD to do. Wow, I would be wary of ever bragging about my relationship to someone. If it doesn't work out then she'll have to eat her words.
This was an interesting thread. I'm glad you posted it. They make us IR's sound so unique but from what I can tell we really aren't. I'm also glad so many of us are expanding our options. No one should be limited to JUST the 10% of the population unless they really want to be. I know black men sometimes try to make it seem like they don't want us and no one else will either but most of the men white and asian that I've talked to tell me that they had no idea we'd even be interested in them. They are actually shocked when they find out we like some one other than a black man. Plus, black men love indulging in the stereotype that they have the biggest ummm....member....so I honestly think that intimidates some men sometimes. They wonder how they are gonna compare. I assure you that's a myth by the way.
UmSumayyah
Well-Known Member
adequate said:ok! i see! It sounds like SHE was just trying to stir up problems. I guess there comes a point when you have to ignore but it's HARD to do. Wow, I would be wary of ever bragging about my relationship to someone. If it doesn't work out then she'll have to eat her words.
This was an interesting thread. I'm glad you posted it. They make us IR's sound so unique but from what I can tell we really aren't. I'm also glad so many of us are expanding our options. No one should be limited to JUST the 10% of the population unless they really want to be. I know black men sometimes try to make it seem like they don't want us and no one else will either but most of the men white and asian that I've talked to tell me that they had no idea we'd even be interested in them. They are actually shocked when they find out we like some one other than a black man. Plus, black men love indulging in the stereotype that they have the biggest ummm....member....so I honestly think that intimidates some men sometimes. They wonder how they are gonna compare. I assure you that's a myth by the way.
Well I gave her the benefit of the doubt that she wasn't trying to "nyah nyah nee nyah nyah! Look what I got and you can't get!" at people. She was only drawing on her experience but at first it was annoying because she came off as: "White men won't marry black women and if any of you have a white man he's not a rich upper class mucky-muck like mine!
"But it's all blown over now. She further explained, I apologized and that's that.
yourleoqueen
New Member
Who on here looks like Vanessa Williams and is married to a neurosurgeon? I'm just curious...
N.P.R. Addict
New Member
yourleoqueen said:Who on here looks like Vanessa Williams and is married to a neurosurgeon? I'm just curious...
That was HennaGirl. She never said she looked like Vanessa Williams, she said her husband said she did. I feel the heat coming.
DDTexlaxed
TRANSITION OVER! 11-22-14
Happily married to my hubby 7 yrs ( he's Italian)
Met at church (same faith)
We're not models, but I think we're both far from ugly
not financially sound, but stable.
Met at church (same faith)
We're not models, but I think we're both far from ugly
not financially sound, but stable.
UmSumayyah
Well-Known Member
PME_LADY said:
No heat allowed.
Like I said it's in the past.PinkSkates
New Member
The title of this thread is too funny Well since you are bold enough to ask; then I'll answer. My hubby is white; but he's one of the cool ones.
This is too funny
Well since you are bold enough to ask; then I'll answer. My hubby is white; but he's one of the cool ones. This is too funny
thiccknlong
New Member
UmSumayyah said:
I'm with you ! 70% ! lol
Meaning, I'm no longer looking out for decent black men (did this 99% of the time) . Or lowering my standards to include someone who I knew i didnt deserve ( 1 did this once, will NEVER do that again ).
Alot of my girlfriends and girls that I know of , are single or have settled. Very few have a decent black men. The ones that are single are like me, wanting someone who is decent. Meaning...
- Have a career meaning, preferably educated because this increases your chance of survival, but if not, have something that is needed and you can depend on to make a decent living, not just a "job".
- Have 1 or less children. Maybe 2 but that's a far stretch.
- Not be a whore.
- Be respectful to females.
- Mature minded. Not view a female as a "hit" or a chance to continue a "playa" mentality.
- Family oriented.
- Working to get assets/have something or already has something.
thiccknlong
New Member
pinkskates said:The title of this thread is too funny
This is too funny
I dont mean to pry....and if my questions move beyond your boundaries, of course , you dont' have to answer and I respect that.
Is your husband family oriented ?
Very respectful of females ?
I hate to be this honest, but women who are married to white men have a greater chance of having the qualities in a man that they want.
I'm not speaking opinion, I'm speaking facts.
When you go to the park, who do you see with their families ?
When you go to church, who do you see with their families ?
When you go to a restaurant, who do you see with their families ?
When you go to a career oriented job, who do you see in those offices ? I say offices because the jobs that require a career means someone worked hard to have something and their priorities are more likely in order in that area
When you go to vacation spots, who do you see with their families ?
When you look at black households, who do you see with their families ? most of ours are headed by the black female where as the man either left the family or never married in the beginning
Ask yourself these questions as black women, and most of us will answer in the same way. Not all of us, no. But most of us.
This lets us know, I'm not being hard on most of our black men, I'm just putting the facts and reality out there. And most dont want to face it, admit it or think about it because, it's embarrassing.
thiccknlong
New Member
thefineprint said:
Well....at least you have less of a chance of catching HIV , cause their rates are sooooooooooooooo much lower than our men, that it's pathetic.
Serenity_Peace
Genius never dies!
thicknlong said:
They faithfully wear their wedding rings, too! I've noticed that. Most white men wear their rings whether they're cheating or not.
Serenity_Peace
Genius never dies!
Ladies, I'm going to be honest here:
As I continue to age and find that I am more willing to expand my horizons, so to speak, I am beginning to accept that my parents may have been right. You see, they always expected me to marry white for various reasons:
1. I was raised in a fairly mixed--mostly white--neighborhood.
2. Always went to white schools.
3. I have much more interaction with whites at work simply because there are a lot more of them. There are only two black professionals where I work: one is gay and the other is married. Most other blacks are women.
But, if I'm just basing this judgement strictly on probability, I would assert that the likelihood of me being with a white man and marrying one is great due to several conditions:
1. My work environment
2. The fact that in the area where I live there is a small population of eligible black men who will not have a problem with my level of education, job, salary
3. I prefer to date men who are more socially and politically progressive. It is very difficult to find an eligible black man with progressive attitudes.
4. I have very unconventional tastes with regards to the things I like to do: alternative rock concerts, skiing, running/cycling, and other activities not typically associated with things that your average black man would not necessarily be interesed in. (Please note: your average black man is NOT a generalization.)
As I continue to age and find that I am more willing to expand my horizons, so to speak, I am beginning to accept that my parents may have been right. You see, they always expected me to marry white for various reasons:
1. I was raised in a fairly mixed--mostly white--neighborhood.
2. Always went to white schools.
3. I have much more interaction with whites at work simply because there are a lot more of them. There are only two black professionals where I work: one is gay and the other is married. Most other blacks are women.
But, if I'm just basing this judgement strictly on probability, I would assert that the likelihood of me being with a white man and marrying one is great due to several conditions:
1. My work environment
2. The fact that in the area where I live there is a small population of eligible black men who will not have a problem with my level of education, job, salary
3. I prefer to date men who are more socially and politically progressive. It is very difficult to find an eligible black man with progressive attitudes.
4. I have very unconventional tastes with regards to the things I like to do: alternative rock concerts, skiing, running/cycling, and other activities not typically associated with things that your average black man would not necessarily be interesed in. (Please note: your average black man is NOT a generalization.)
PinkSkates
New Member
1. My husband is family-oriented to the 100th power. We do everything as a family. And when we are not together, he is constantly checkin in via cell phone, txt msg.,etc... when I take our son ito the rink for his ice skating training, I have to send cell phone pics, and give him a quick call if he lands a jump more than 3 times in a row. And the same goes for when we are at Karate lessons; I could go on and on...
2. He is most respectful of all women; His parents were married for 52 years (dad recently died) and he was taught that you give all of your being to your wife and children. And that's what kind of man I'm married to.
Our quality of life is so blessed! I was raised to believe that I was a little pincess and that once I was ready to settle down, that I was not to settle for anything less then my prince.
Now, I must be honest and admit that this is not my first marriage. My first husband was black. He is a successful attorney, and an ex-electrical engineer; and as fine-looking as they come. And he too was a family oriented man, and very respectful of me and all women. As a matter of fact him and my present husband come from similar
backgrounds. Unfortunately, I was very, very young when I married him; and most immature. I had no business being married, so our marriage quickly fell apart. I think finding a guy with similar goals, morals and principals as yourself is the key to happiness and a quality life.
gymfreak336
New Member
pinkskates said:
Well said. Regardless of color, you have to be equally yoked.
thiccknlong
New Member
gymfreak336 said:
Bowing to your comment.
That is PRIMARY.
Thanks for the comment. Both you and pinkskates.
Pinkskates, sorry the first marraige didnt work out. But I am soooo happy for youuu ! I love to see families ! And to see men taking care of their children and wives, men being interested in their kids lives and help raising them !!!
Sounds like you probably would have had a similar life with the first husband. Blessings !
Last edited:
thiccknlong
New Member
Serenity_Peace said:
I to , share the items in red.
PinkSkates
New Member
Thank you Thickinlong,... we live and learn girl, live and learn. Many blessings to you and your family.
StrawberryQueen
Well-Known Member
May I ask where you're getting these facts? If that's the case, why even date black men if white men are so much better?thicknlong said:
Still didn't get an answer to my 1st question, but I guess that's what happens when folks pull "facts" out of their behinds.
LocksOfLuV said:
Yea you know? But I guess since white men have a lower HIV infection rate, why use condoms? They're clean and perfect right?
Last edited:
thiccknlong
New Member
StrawberryQueen said:
The Center for Disease Control in Atlanta, Georgia. The institution at the forefront of tracking and controlling diseases serving as epidemic and pandemic threats to the masses..."...The rate of AIDS diagnoses for black men was 8 times the rate for white men [2]. ".....During June 2004--April 2005, participants in five NHBS cities (Baltimore, Maryland; Los Angeles, California; Miami, Florida; New York, New York; and San Francisco, California)
This means, if our men do not stop their behavior, and say,
800,000 of our men have HIV
only 100,000 of white men have it.
That's 700,000 more men.
700,000 of our men, that any of us on this site, could meet and possibly begin a serious relationship with.
Sorry it hurts, it's a painful fact for me to. I really do hate this is happening, I really do.
But, it is fact darlin.
...as for us black females, in 2005, blacks made up 13% of the population .
only 19% of hiv inf's were white women......
64% were us, black females......
now, wonder where did our beautiful black sisters get this from? I'm just asking shrugs
Last edited:
LocksOfLuV
New Member
thicknlong said:
You neglected to answer the second part of her question. She wasn't disputing the facts at all and ain't nobody 'hurt.' I hear that info everyday. Nothing new to me or anyone here.
ARE YOU GOING TO STOP USING CONDOMS for white men?
thiccknlong
New Member
LocksOfLuV said:
Wow, your tone is ...interesting at the least. As for the bold, she WAS disputing the facts. And I quote, "...May I ask where you're getting these facts? .." .....Read it again.
I really don't like your tone as if to MAKE me answer a question. And that you are angry because I didnt...deal with it !
No I didnt neglect to answer any of the questions. I just felt being a BLACK woman, she needed to know the FACTS about the BLACK MALE HIV RATE, rather than MY PERSONAL BUSINESS.
My personal decisions can not affect her life.
Her being aware of the high HIV rate of OUR MEN does.
DID I ANSWER YOUR QUESTION ? If you can read between the lines, you would understand my plight.
If not, then I understand yours. Hmmm.....
Last edited: