If a guy is into you, he will put up with almost anything?

[CurlyMoo]

True or false

I got this off another forum and it's funny to me.

Ive spent the last year proving i can be everything he needs. until he met this girl that ended up dating his bestfriend matt at the same time. And still today she dates them both back and fourth and they are so in love with her. When i see my cancer man i can tell he feels sympathy for me but has no interest in talking to me. I get it hard to get, but thats alittle much with his best friend. She's at matt's house at night and my cancer's during the day.

They are actually sharing this woman. What is going on here? Seems like if a woman does whatever the hell she wants a guy will pursue her more. She doesn't seem to be committed to either one but enjoys having them both. Will men put up with the most indecent crap from a woman if they are "into" her?

 

[NijaG]

True or false

I got this off another forum and it's funny to me.



They are actually sharing this woman. What is going on here? Seems like if a woman does whatever the hell she wants a guy will pursue her more. She doesn't seem to be committed to either one but enjoys having them both. Will men put up with the most indecent crap from a woman if they are "into" her?

Men will put up with a lot for women they are crazy about. Also, she's not being indecent because she's not hiding anything from both men. They're both willing to compete for her.

Frankly, I absolutely love her game. She doesn't give a F***. That's the way to do things.

The other lady was wasting her time trying to prove herself to her guy. That's one of the classic signs of He's Just Not That Into You. Not to say that women should just act any negative way they want, but in dating/courtship it's the man's job to prove himself to the female.

In the animal kingdom, there is not one single species where the female are proving themselves to the male.

 

[CurlyMoo]

Men will put up with a lot for women they are crazy about. Also, she's not being indecent because she's not hiding anything from both men. They're both willing to compete for her.

Frankly, I absolutely love her game. She doesn't give a F***. That's the way to do things.

I personally don't think she is indecent but some may due to the fact that she is living with two men in their places and there is a good chance she is screwing them both.

I love her game too and wish I had her situation. Two men and a place to stay. I bet she's not paying rent.

 

[LoveBeautyKisses]

Amen

Protective Stylin' on y'all.

 

[PeaceFlow]

Not if they have self worth and any sense of pride. I'm not into puppy dog men and women doormat types, but they do exist. There's plenty of men that would rather cut a ridiculous woman off and feel the burn rather than get played and shamed like this.

On the flip, I meet women who are "ride or dies" fairly often, but that doesn't mean if a woman really likes a man she will be that chick. Most men and women have a cut off point where they have to walk away, even when "into" someone.

 

[FrazzledFraggle]

I'll say true (for a time).

My sister was this way with her DH. They got married really young and she would leave for months with this guy and when she got tired of him she'd go back home and her DH would always let her back. This went on for years and years and years with different men....just disappear for like literally half a year and then pop up one day.

I think he always let her back because of the kids.

Eventually she stopped and they have been together now for about 25 years (married) and now they seem to be happy ever after. How he put up with her during that time, I do not know.

I think this behavior from men is more the exception than the norm. My perception may be skewed because I work in family law and by the time I see these types of cases, someone is filing for a divorce.

 

[ManeStreet]

I wouldn't suggest trying to do bad things just to test him. but men love women who are 100 percent unapologetically themselves. the appeal of women like that is, they aren't asking for a mans acceptance or love. That woman is saying with her actions, when it comes to me take it or leave it.

that intrigues men. even the man who can have any woman he wants, is intrigued and enamored by the 1 woman he can't seem to conquer.

 

[Mai Tai]

I don't know, but I voted "false" only because I have never really encountered men like this. I am completely turned off by men who would let me run over them so I guess I've never made it to that phase where he takes me back over and over again.

 

[allmundjoi]

From the OP. The 2 men are in competition. They probably thrive off of it. As soon as the girl chooses one man, that man will leave her. Lol. This has nothing to do with a woman being able to do anything with a love sick man, but more to do with the competitive nature of many men.

I voted no/false.

 

[LaBelleLL]

I don't think this is far off at. all. In fact, there are several posters here on LHCF who post all the time that they dated like this and actually ended up marrying the one that proposed. I am also under the impression that there are several posters who currently date this way....

But hmm, I never thought that their men might have had no pride or would let people run up on them....

 

[Lymegreen]

I voted false also.

 

[Pat Mahurr]

From the OP. The 2 men are in competition. They probably thrive off of it. As soon as the girl chooses one man, that man will leave her. Lol. This has nothing to do with a woman being able to do anything with a love sick man, but more to do with the competitive nature of many men.

Men don't want it if it's too easy, and many of them need the thrill of the chase.

 

[Middle]

Lol I've always understood it as men love very very hard. Harder than women IMO. I think that's why crimes of passion tend to be committed by men? It literally drives them crazy. I think they can only love like that maybe 1 or 2 times in their life before they learn not to do that again. some also learn to avoid the types of women who will bring that side out of him, i think. Think about it, it's understood that it a man loves you'll he'll work his *** off for you, die for you, go hungry so you can eat, etc. if a women did the same for a man, we'd all tell her that she's doing it wrong.

So yeah, I believe it. if he's in love.

 

[FelaShrine]

Some do..depending. i do puh boundaries just to see how much they can take. What I really wanna see is the reaction

That's important

 

[FelaShrine]

I don't think this is far off at. all. In fact, there are several posters here on LHCF who post all the time that they dated like this and actually ended up marrying the one that proposed. I am also under the impression that there are several posters who currently date this way....

But hmm, I never thought that their men might have had no pride or would let people run up on them....

where has anyone stated that they are sleeping with best friends and waiting for one to propose

 

[barbiesocialite]

True......

 

[barbiesocialite]

Lol I've always understood it as men love very very hard. Harder than women IMO. I think that's why crimes of passion tend to be committed by men? It literally drives them crazy. I think they can only love like that maybe 1 or 2 times in their life before they learn not to do that again. some also learn to avoid the types of women who will bring that side out of him, i think. Think about it, it's understood that it a man loves you'll he'll work his *** off for you, die for you, go hungry so you can eat, etc. if a women did the same for a man, we'd all tell her that she's doing it wrong.

So yeah, I believe it. if he's in love.

this.

I learned from my parents example. My mom isnt a cheater or philanderer but I know one thing, my father should have divorced her a long time ago. Since he didnt, he ended up being the one at fault for the relationship because she made that man crazy. Sometimes I think, although not always, he initially loved and loves her too much. He still loves her speaks highly of her yet she's is hell bent on never getting back together with him, has been separated from him for over a decade and has spent the bulk of that time ignoring, dodging and not talking to him AT ALL. For example, when he comes to visit through the front door, she'll walk right out the back door. At the same time, while my dad loves her I think he hates her too. He has too, I would if I were him. What is wrong with this man, it's like he hasnt moved on. That's some crazy mess right there that only a man would do .......clearly my mom, the woman, dgaf......

 

[Fine 4s]

I want a man with balls. I lose respect for men that I can walk over...
A man that can check me [appropriately] is...oh so hot.

 

[LaBelleLL]

where has anyone stated that they are sleeping with best friends and waiting for one to propose

Didn't say that exactly. There are people here who date and date around, even while in a relationship with someone. It's only until dude proposes they stop. Not sure if they are sleeping with them since ppl set their own parameters and I doubt any woman on the board here would be forthcoming with that information.

This is the dating strategy that Zaynab, like clockwork, proposes in every thread she can. OR correct me if in wrong bc this is what I am referring to and perhaps I've misunderstood this advice.

Maybe Zaynab and those who think similarly would say that the difference is that here, the woman is sleeping with them both. To me, that's a relatively minor difference for some reason.

 

[barbiesocialite]

Didn't say that exactly. There are people here who date and date around, even while in a relationship with someone. It's only until dude proposes they stop. Not sure if they are sleeping with them since ppl set their own parameters and I doubt any woman on the board here would be forthcoming with that information.

This is the dating strategy that Zaynab, like clockwork, proposes in every thread she can. OR correct me if in wrong bc this is what I am referring to and perhaps I've misunderstood this advice.

Maybe Zaynab and those who think similarly would say that the difference is that here, the woman is sleeping with them both. To me, that's a relatively minor difference for some reason.

LaBelleLL

can't speak for Z, but since I'm already in this thread and everyone thinks I'm the single version or her stan giggle: ) I'll give my two cents :
To keep it honest and one hunned. Honestly, I think the sexing thing is a matter of personal preference. Women don't like to hear this but heauxs get married at the same rate as virgins. My style--keep your legs closed. HOWEVER, I have enough friends I can vouch for that were doing some *cough* questionable things with other men before their DH/FH popped the question. #nojudgement from me. Nonetheless, the premise is the same regardless of sexual involvement. Empowering women by providing yourself with options. Know he's not the only one and you have a choice regardless what happens. The power of choice. Thats very freeing and empowering, I don't care what anyone says. Simply knowing you have the power to decide your fate and outcome vs gambling your life on luck and hope.

You can do this with or without having sex. Again, #nojudgement from me, I've seen both work. The sex thing, however, involves an aspect of self-control over one's emotions and actions, which once oxytocin is produced is much more difficult for a woman to maintain. Also, since I do believe in holding off on sex, it's not for manipulative purpose or tactic. I only have sex with those I'm serious about, only one man at a time and it's for a degree of "saving" that I have reserved for a DH. (although I'm not a virgin, I believe in saving off on certain sexual activities such as regular/frequent sex, raw, anal. etc). This is just my preference because I am more of an emotional woman than some other women. Nonetheless, bringing out a man's nature to compete and earn affection/devotion/commitment is very salient in he long run. He's always trying to prove himself. Always trying to earn you. Always trying to convince you he is the 'one' and 'only.' Men hate to lose. They especially hate to lose something of value. Limits how much a woman can be taken advantage of IMO. Plenty of long-term married women to attest to this. Some women think the competition stops with the verbal "we go together." NO, it stops when he has committed fully aka puts a ring on it and a projective wedding date has been set.

BUT like I said, plenty of heauxs that sex all their options have had the same or similar results. *yet shrugs*

 

[PopLife]

Yes, probably but I feel like the same applies to women too...you will put up with more from people you like/love....

 

[Aviah]

Some men would, but I don't think they should...
Its the same as women taking almost anything for a guy she's really into. Like another poster said- if he has any pride he will not put up with just anything.

Besides, who says these men don't have their other women too?

 

[shortycocoa]

I think it's true, but only to a certain extent. Everyone has their limits, including men.

 

[Ganjababy]

In my experience. It's true 90% of the time....

 

[greenandchic]

I voted false, but that's not entirely true.

There is a guy, "S" who is that way. He's been on a hunt/chase for 3 1/2 years, even though there have been other guys that have come into the picture and one, "R", still remains.

Keep in mind, I don't mistreat, am sweet as pie, coy, modest, and don't give away the milk. Some men can be fixated on one person as long as they think they have a 1% chance and I think "S" is that way.

I think if I was a b****, that would end quickly with both of them. They are both divorced, been around the block and don't have time for mean, lying, women.

I think it depends on where they are in life.

 

[sheanu]

He'll put up with almost anything for a period of time.

 

[CurlyMoo]

I honestly believe he will until he has moved on then the things he put up with he doesn't tolerate.

 

[jhcprincess]

I think it is true... to a point

 

[aribell]

I agree with what was said above, that it depends on the man. I've seen some men take a lot of outright disrespect and remain just as devoted to their wives. This probably has more to do with their own sense of self-esteem, or lack thereof, than with the women themselves.

Also, who knows how the woman's persona changes when they are alone. There has to be something good there or else the man wouldn't be interested at all. So just like men can talk a big game, so can women by giving the appearance that she's just got all these men at her beck and call; but one-on-one with men it seems likely, imo, that her persona must be at least somewhat softer.

 

[menina]

Depends on the situation.