I Made An Appointment To Relax My Hair.

[Crackers Phinn]

I'm venting so my thoughts are going to be all over the place.

I can't take it no mo!

So what had happened was:

I transitioned to natural the first time in 2004, permed my hair in 2008, transitioned to natural again in 2010, wore wigs for 3.5 of the last 6 years, edges got slightly snatched, started wearing my natural hair in twists or a puff for the last few months and I'm tired of looking like a Rasta librarian. Thankfully my edges are back.

I looked into sisterlocs and that **** is high as giraffe nuts and time consuming. Actually it seems to me that all locs are unless you become self sufficient which I obviously won't since I can't even manage loose hair. I been lurking in the locs thread and that section of YouTube for a while now.

If I could continue wearing wigs without thinning my edges I probably wouldn't contemplate relaxing. Although, flat twisting and corn rolling my hair for the wigs to lay flat rendered me tender headed for the first time ever which is why I know the weave route ain't for me.

Here is the reason natural hair sucks for me: My flat twist and corn rolling skills are not fit to be seen in public so my go to hair style is a puff which pretty much makes me look bald headed from the front and results in single strand knots or twists which have to be redone every 2 weeks on the dot or else my hair begins to loc. I know people with locs will say that's impossible but they haven't sat through taking my hair down before. I tried doing heat training via roller setting and the hair straightening brush but I think it has only loosed my hair by a 1/4 of an inch. My shrinkage is serious.

Here is the reason relaxed hair sucks for me: I stretch for 20-24 weeks and get completely pissed off trying to style the two textures. This normally leads to a ponytail which makes me look bald headed (see the pattern). If I got long hair I want to see it which usually results in me dropping the ball on protective styling. Hello breakage!

I think this may be my last hurrah pursuing long hair tho. My most pressing issue with my hair besides single strand knots is that this gray hair texture is a whole nother beast. If my regular degular black hair is type 4 then this gray is on some type 7 double D. One strand of hair will be coily at the end, straight in the middle and z shaped near the root. I'm telling ya'll my hair is infused with dinosaur DNA. Ole pterodactyl a-- hair.

The next stop for my hair is going the Danai Guerra/Amber Rose route (except dark brown color 4) and keeping up a beat face cuz this hair game got me shook.

On the home front my big fat Jewish family got jokes. After hearing me on the phone asking any and everybody to give me a reason not to relax these mf's gift wrapped a box of Dark and Lovely with a card saying "do it. do it." scribbled. They are well aware that their ain't ****-ness level is on 11. Before this becomes the focus of the thread, most people who know me irl know that I'm quick to tell folks that if you keep harping on a subject the answer is to just act and get it over with. The jokey joke is their way of telling me to **** or get off the pot.


Well, the appointment is for next Tuesday. I'm leaning more towards a texlaxed result than bone straight. I'll still be able to blend my hair when installing kinky twists with marly hair

sigh

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Update 10.18.16

A less puffy version of what my hair looked like everyday.

Blow Dried Pre-trim My ends were covered in single strand knots.

Blow Dried Trimmed I wouldn't have been mad if she took another inch but whatevs.

The flat ironed pics are bootleg since the ends are bumped under. Just imagine these pics except shinier.

Overall, I'm happy with the results. I've got to watch some pincurl tutorials on the Tube of You.

 

[beingofserenity]

Good luck!

Are you Jewish by birth or conversion???

 

[beingofserenity]

....

 

[dicapr]

Since you can't take stretching you may just want to relax every 10-12 weeks and call it a day. As far as the cost of my retwist cost the same as when I was getting a relaxer every 8 weeks. What ever you do don't do anything out of frustration. Slap a wig on it until you are sure of your decision.

 

[Bunnyhaslonghair]

There are some good stylists that relax out there these days. Share pics if you'd like!

 

[Daina]

I'm sorry you are struggling with your natural hair and if relaxing/texlaxing will make it easier then do it. Life is too short and there's too many other things to stress over than hair! I will say though that your post was hella funny!

 

[LadyPBC]

Do it - do it! I need your success story to help me make the decision to return to the creamy crack. I have basically given up on the natural game since all i do is wear wigs anyway and I like way I look when I do. I don't have a full thick head of hair so being relaxed (aside from the chemicals) is not an option I'm anxious to run too besides I spend too much time covering up my gray hair too. Lawd your venting is rubbing off on me. I think, like you @Crackers Phinn, that I'd only like to texlax as well. Best wishes - please keep us informed!!!

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Good luck!

Are you Jewish by birth or conversion???

conversion

 

[Foxglove]

If you want to stretch your relaxer that long maybe you could use heat to keep your hair straight inbetween appointments?

 

[lesedi]

I feel you,it's something I'm considering too, hair just doesn't mean as much to me as it did before. I feel like hair is supposed to be easy to manage, I have no space in my life for hair-induced stress. Just relax every 2-3 months , leave the stress with your stylist and let your tresses blow in the autumnal wind

 

[YvetteWithJoy]

@Crackers Phinn, I can relate!

You are not aloooooooone. I am here with youuuuuuuuuuu . . .

Lol! Can you get your hair blown out and wear your hair natural but straight for a month to see if straight hair is what you really want?

I understand your post 100%: I don't do hair. People keep telling me to stop wng-Ing and start braiding, rollersetting, etc. I can't do that stuff on natural hair myself!

If I have to pay for all this stuff and sit up at the salon, I'd rather instead texlax or relax and only go in every 13 weeks or so.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Lol! Can you get your hair blown out and wear your hair natural but straight for a month to see if straight hair is what you really want?

I live in a beach city so the few times I've gotten my hair pressed it reverted within a day. Too much moisture in the air.

 

[B_Phlyy]

In all the time you've been on the forum, you've probably grown and cut 100 inches of hair. We all know you're new relaxed hair is going to be great.

 

[MysTori]

Believe me, I hear you. Reading your story was reading my own. I have Transitioned-Big Chopped 3 times with years in between. I tried, I really did, but it just wasn't working. I was thinking about getting locs but then I saw this little girl with locs and one loc looked like it was hanging by a strand. That just reminded me that that form/style of natural hair came with its own set of challenges. I went ahead and texlaxed (at a salon) 2 weeks ago and am very, very happy. I've decided to just focus on growing healthy, long(ish) hair.

So, I'm not pushing you to relax but I'm not trying to stop you either. Sounds like with relaxed hair, you just need to relax it sooner, maybe every 3 or 4 months instead. Let us know what you did (pics plz).

 

[Napp]

Wigs and bkt-ing work for me. I just put my wigs slightly behind my edges

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Wigs and bkt-ing work for me. I just put my wigs slightly behind my edges

How much does the BKT run you? A friend of mine does it and pays $200 for touch ups and she's got really fine hair.

 

[sunnieb]

@Crackers Phinn come on over to the relaxed side!

 

[frizzy]

I live in a beach city so the few times I've gotten my hair pressed it reverted within a day. Too much moisture in the air.

Have you tried the Beautiful Textures Texture Management System (BTTMS or TMS)? I have and I recommend it.

I plan to keep my natural hair straight-ish for who knows how long because I am sick of SSKs and a shorter, crown-area patch of hair. I won't be flat ironing regularly, but I will be blow drying every wash day if I don't do some kind of roller set and sit under the dryer. I know for sure I won't be going to bed or outside with a wet head this Winter.

All that to say, that I would rather be a heat-trained/heat-damaged natural than to risk the health of my scalp any more in life. Try heat!!!!

 

[prettybyrd]

If it weren't for the fact that the migraine headaches stopped when I stopped relaxing, I would relax again.

The idea of working out in pin curls and my hair not being destroyed by my sweat is so appealing. #teamjealous

Make sure you post pics!!

 

[IDareT'sHair]

@Crackers Phinn
Whatever your decision - I am here to support you.

I'm sure it will look very nice and you'll be happy with your final decision.

*Wishing for a Healthy Head of Relaxed Hair for you*

 

[Napp]

How much does the BKT run you? A friend of mine does it and pays $200 for touch ups and she's got really fine hair.

I do them myself but I am also a licenced cosmetologist. Even so, I did them without my license for years. I bought a kit for $200 and it came with like 1k worth of product. I like what I'm using now because the effects are permanent. I just do my roots every 4 months. My hair is doing well.

 

[overtherainbow]

Devils advocate because I love the way your natural hair looks whenever you post snippets of it. Why not try wngs, braidouts, presses? I'm super style challenged. I can't even cornrow, but a wng and braidout are my go to's. But then again, I look like the rasta librarian. I live in twists during the winter and updos,
But then again, relaxing might be a nice change. I'm just biased

 

[Honey Bee]

I'm not there, but I understand. I style my natural hair exactly how I styled my relaxed hair tho, cuz I really am that uncreative.

 

[11228]

I'm venting so my thoughts are going to be all over the place.

I can't take it no mo!

So what had happened was:

I transitioned to natural the first time in 2004, permed my hair in 2008, transitioned to natural again in 2010, wore wigs for 3.5 of the last 6 years, edges got slightly snatched, started wearing my natural hair in twists or a puff for the last few months and I'm tired of looking like a Rasta librarian. Thankfully my edges are back.

I looked into sisterlocs and that **** is high as giraffe nuts and time consuming. Actually it seems to me that all locs are unless you become self sufficient which I obviously won't since I can't even manage loose hair. I been lurking in the locs thread and that section of YouTube for a while now.

If I could continue wearing wigs without thinning my edges I probably wouldn't contemplate relaxing. Although, flat twisting and corn rolling my hair for the wigs to lay flat rendered me tender headed for the first time ever which is why I know the weave route ain't for me.

Here is the reason natural hair sucks for me: My flat twist and corn rolling skills are not fit to be seen in public so my go to hair style is a puff which pretty much makes me look bald headed from the front and results in single strand knots or twists which have to be redone every 2 weeks on the dot or else my hair begins to loc. I know people with locs will say that's impossible but they haven't sat through taking my hair down before. I tried doing heat training via roller setting and the hair straightening brush but I think it has only loosed my hair by a 1/4 of an inch. My shrinkage is serious.

Here is the reason relaxed hair sucks for me: I stretch for 20-24 weeks and get completely pissed off trying to style the two textures. This normally leads to a ponytail which makes me look bald headed (see the pattern). If I got long hair I want to see it which usually results in me dropping the ball on protective styling. Hello breakage!

I think this may be my last hurrah pursuing long hair tho. My most pressing issue with my hair besides single strand knots is that this gray hair texture is a whole nother beast. If my regular degular black hair is type 4 then this gray is on some type 7 double D. One strand of hair will be coily at the end, straight in the middle and z shaped near the root. I'm telling ya'll my hair is infused with dinosaur DNA. Ole pterodactyl a-- hair.

The next stop for my hair is going the Danai Guerra/Amber Rose route (except dark brown color 4) and keeping up a beat face cuz this hair game got me shook.

On the home front my big fat Jewish family got jokes. After hearing me on the phone asking any and everybody to give me a reason not to relax these mf's gift wrapped a box of Dark and Lovely with a card saying "do it. do it." scribbled. They are well aware that their ain't ****-ness level is on 11. Before this becomes the focus of the thread, most people who know me irl know that I'm quick to tell folks that if you keep harping on a subject the answer is to just act and get it over with. The jokey joke is their way of telling me to **** or get off the pot.


Well, the appointment is for next Tuesday. I'm leaning more towards a texlaxed result than bone straight. I'll still be able to blend my hair when installing kinky twists with marly hair

sigh

I hope you are able to find what works for you long term.

Personally, I will never quit the white crack. You can be natural with healthy or unhealthy hair. It depends on how it is cared for. Same goes for relaxed hair. My hair is at its healthiest in the first 8 weeks after I've relaxed it.

 

[PeaceFlow]

I cant stand dealing with medium length natural hair, but also hate relaxed hair so theres no where for me to turn lol.

 

[Evolving78]

Let me just help push you off of the ledge!
I did it this past Sunday and I have no regrets! I can't handle long stretches either, so I will be relaxing 8-10 weeks.
Do It!

 

[Evolving78]

I cant stand dealing with medium length natural hair, but also hate relaxed hair so theres no where for me to turn lol.

Try the texture managing systems that are out there, or BKT.

 

[sweet_silvia88]

wishing you some good results my dear!

 

[Nightingale]

Devils advocate because I love the way your natural hair looks whenever you post snippets of it. Why not try wngs, braidouts, presses? I'm super style challenged. I can't even cornrow, but a wng and braidout are my go to's. But then again, I look like the rasta librarian. I live in twists during the winter and updos,
But then again, relaxing might be a nice change. I'm just biased

This is so me! My styling skills are extremely limited so I only do twists and braids (and there "out" styles) and WNGs. If I want something straighter, I have the spiral curlformers and the deep wave curlformers. I don't have any desire to go back to relaxed hair, but understand why some do.

@Crackers Phinn I hope your appointment goes well! Post pics afterward!

 

[Maracujá]

@Crackers Phinn come on over to the relaxed side!

Stealing our people do y'all offer milk, cookies and conditioners too?