vivEz daNs lamouR
Well-Known Member
I normally wouldn't bring many issues up on here for advice unless I really feel like I need other people's input, but this is something that I don't feel comfortable talking to my friends about. Please help with your honest advice. 
When my FH's father died last year, he started becoming more religious and into Islam. I for one had no problem with this, because although I'm not Muslim (but a big portion of my family is), I think its always good for people to find themselves spiritually. I'm in the process of doing so.
However, about six months ago, FH started to grow a beard.
I hate beards. I hate facial hair unless its a mustache or some stubble. In fact, I hate when any man attempts to grow his hair, whether it be facial or on his head.
Seeing FH's hair before when he used to shave, I wasn't worried because I thought that it likely wasn't going to grow into anything, his hair is not of a thick texture or anything of the sort.
This beard has grown into what looks like my FH has glued pubic hairs to his face. Its thin, wispy, and curls up into knots and just looks dirty
. When I started seeing this, I sensed my attraction level to him slowly dwindling down, and now it's at the point where I don't see myself physically attracted to him at all the way that I was before.
The other day, he told me that he wants to grow this beard to see how long he can get it, and all I could do was think to myself how bad this is going to look. Especially imagining my wedding next year and all of the things that I thought of.
The thing is that no one likes it on him. His mother and his sister get on his case about it all the time, my mom has mentioned, even my father when he saw him the last time said "Mannn, the recession is affecting barber shop prices, huh?" and his sister told him that he looked like a goat.
On the one hand, when I think about this, I feel like it comes across as being shallow, and I feel horrible that I'm losing attraction to someone who is a great fiancee and person and has been wonderful to me. But, on the flipside, I just can't shake the feelings that I get because I've just never been one to like beards or facial hair or growth of hair on men at ALL and that just doesn't change.
...What would you do in this situation?
When my FH's father died last year, he started becoming more religious and into Islam. I for one had no problem with this, because although I'm not Muslim (but a big portion of my family is), I think its always good for people to find themselves spiritually. I'm in the process of doing so.
However, about six months ago, FH started to grow a beard.
I hate beards. I hate facial hair unless its a mustache or some stubble. In fact, I hate when any man attempts to grow his hair, whether it be facial or on his head.
Seeing FH's hair before when he used to shave, I wasn't worried because I thought that it likely wasn't going to grow into anything, his hair is not of a thick texture or anything of the sort.
This beard has grown into what looks like my FH has glued pubic hairs to his face. Its thin, wispy, and curls up into knots and just looks dirty
. When I started seeing this, I sensed my attraction level to him slowly dwindling down, and now it's at the point where I don't see myself physically attracted to him at all the way that I was before.The other day, he told me that he wants to grow this beard to see how long he can get it, and all I could do was think to myself how bad this is going to look. Especially imagining my wedding next year and all of the things that I thought of.
The thing is that no one likes it on him. His mother and his sister get on his case about it all the time, my mom has mentioned, even my father when he saw him the last time said "Mannn, the recession is affecting barber shop prices, huh?" and his sister told him that he looked like a goat.
On the one hand, when I think about this, I feel like it comes across as being shallow, and I feel horrible that I'm losing attraction to someone who is a great fiancee and person and has been wonderful to me. But, on the flipside, I just can't shake the feelings that I get because I've just never been one to like beards or facial hair or growth of hair on men at ALL and that just doesn't change.
...What would you do in this situation?
. I would still talk to him and lay it down on the table, maybe you call can compromise on the length or something, even tho they want to grow them as long as they can. You know its a sin to be up in the masjid babyfaced. One of my unlces cant grow facial hair and he is the black sheep up amongst the men.
....... I realllly feel for you because obviously a great part of why youre with him is youre attraction to him and if his looks are becoming unnappealing...
erplexed Ummm, he wasn't following Islam when you met, then got engaged right? It's kind of crazy for him to spring all this new stuff on you and expect everything to be kosher. (I really don't mean that to be funny in any way, I just can't think of another way to say it).
