I just love this thread.
So now that I oil every day, I rarely use water or leave ins. I have decided that there is a saturation point your hair can achieve and after that it is all good. It is a balance trying to discover which oils and how much to use. But I think I am there. I have different oiling regimes for scalp, length, ends and edges. But I am at the point that my hair feels just as smooth when I run my fingers with or against the grain ( if that makes sense). My hair is not soft, though. It feels strong and not dry.
So today I oiled my scalp with moegrow, my length with warmed coconut oil and the ends with a little constant care for ends. I covered the length in my signature hair hider (the end of black nylon pantyhose wrapped in a circle then tucked under). Feels great, not greasy, not a hair out of place.
BTW, I need to update my picture, I am relaxed again about two inches from where I was the first time.