He Proposed With No Ring. What's Your Answer: Yes Or No?

[trueheartofgold]

I saw this online and wanted to know what you ladies have to say:

 

[trueheartofgold]

I think stability should be established before getting married. Yes things happen but a no ring proposal, then married three weeks later to upgraded rings in one year seems off to me.

 

[summertimewine]

NO.
A ring is symbiotic of your status in his eyes. I wish I would have a man on one knee talmbout "Imma get you a ring later". Stop trying to lower the bar for men

 

[secretdiamond]

No thanks to all of it: no ring, her 1st set, and her 2nd set. No thanks would be my answer to ALL these.

 

[PJaye]

All three of those rings are ugly.

 

[locabouthair]

I guess she's the exception but to me it's a not a real proposal without a ring.

 

[LushLox]

Come correctly or don't come at all.

 

[Topsido]

She should wait until 10+ of married years before she starts throwing "that's why you are single" shade.

No, it shows his lack of impulse control and preparedness.

 

[nlamr2013]

Why was it so important to get married before dude was financially stable?
And 3 weeks engagement?
Was the woman pregnant? If so I wouldn't side eye the couple too much for getting married with no rings.
However, if there were no reason to be married so hurriedly I would say no.

 

[SmileyNY]

A few months before we got engaged, DH took me to a diamond dealer to look at stones... so I would have felt totally bamboozled and thoroughly disappointed if he proposed without one.

Don't dangle a carrot (or in this case karats lol) without making me a darn salad

 

[weaveadiva]

Girl, I guess *shrug*

She should wait until 10+ of married years before she starts throwing "that's why you are single" shade.

For real.

 

[cocomochaa]

#icanfinancemyself as a hastag is sad.

Useless men have succeeded in scaremongering the world that 99% of women are gold diggers and to expect anything else but cuddles, texts and laughs from a man means you're materialistic, shallow and not a real woman.
Makes me sick.
Having women co-signing the importance of struggle relationships; build your 30+ man up, give a brotha a chance.
Bun that!
Men expecting women to accept the bare min, are the same ones who wouldn't date a woman if her life was in complete disarray, beyond broke, and needed a man to build her up.
KMT
Most men who are worried and constantly complain about gold diggers are poor or not ballin' and forever pushing the rhetoric 'prove to me you're not here for my non-existent money'.
Rich men know what time it is and don't give a flying f.
Sorry ladies, rant over!!!

 

[Holla]

#SpoilMeWithLoyalty....it's like that now lol. Being loyal is spoiling a woman???

Dude was broke year 1 but got all this money year 2 and 3 to no longer be at his worst?? No engagement ring but got in her "upgrades" a year later - so he came up just that quickly????? LOL Anyone else find it hard to see the rags to riches story here lol

Do what works for you (if it will even work out) but all that #shade against a tradition that has been around longer than you ever will be ...nah.

 

[ava2]

 

[qchelle]

All three of those rings are ugly.

They really are

 

[MrsWatson]

No to everything she posted. When DH went to my dad to ask permission to marry me, my dad needed to see the ring up front. We all would have given the stink eye if he wouldn't have had one. Secondly, those "upgrade" sets are gaudy and ugly.

 

[ThursdayGirl]

Sorry, I am a traditionalist. I would wonder if the reason you didn't come with some kind of ring made of metal, preferably gold is because your wife would notice the charge and you aren't officially divorced yet.

I would have to know the circumstances. I might say "yes" (if I'm sure he isn't married) but I wouldn't say "I do" until I was sure he can/is/and would continue to be stable.


--------
Those rings are poor quality/fake/or he is bad with money or something ain't clean in the water. That makes no reasonable sense.

 

[TCatt86]

Those rings are ugly. He couldn't even afford a plain wedding band? No thanks.

 

[BronzeVenus]

 

[toaster]

In my ideal engagement my proposal comes early in the morning with an explanation that we're headed to the diamond district to get exactly what I want, that day.

I've never tried on engagement rings before and I know myself. I would be a miserable human being if we went to try on rings months before the actual proposal. I would be so anxious!

And sure, I have an idea of what I'd like, but until I see it on my finger I won't be sure.

But no ring and no plan? Heck no.

 

[Everything Zen]

But.. If he had money to go get them uglass tattoo rings he had money to get her a tasteful inexpensive ring....?

 

[LiftedUp]

I'd pass on that scenario in the OP.

However my dad proposed with no ring cuz he knew how my mom was, and took her to choose her own ring the next day

 

[IslandMummy]

DH proposed with no ring and we went to pick one up after I said yes.

 

[Bronxcutie]

Why are black women expected to accept this nonsense? If my man can't afford a ring then we don't need to be married. I don't need a $20,000 ring but I need something nice! They should have worked together on getting their finances straight. Your ideal partner should inspire you to be at your best. I don't want to work this summer(I'm a teacher) but I'm going to take this short gig because that money will allow me to knock out debt and put money in savings, and help to pay my tuition so that I can finish the last 15 credits to get my Masters. Besides my daughter, my man inspires me to work hard as he works hard. He's a saver and will work 24 hours to avoid owing anyone. I cannot fathom marrying someone that can't buy me a ring. I have seen beautiful rings for $2000 that I would accept. No other race is asked to deal with the Build-A-Negro mess.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

A ring is a symbol of financial security and commitment. It's also become a part of the ritual.

I do think people should keep in mind that a lot of men presenting rings have horrible credit and tons of debt, which, to me, is not financial security. I've seen too many women with nice rings struggling financially several years into the marriage.

I want my daughter to get a ring. But I also want her to review thoroughly the finances of anyone who is a potential husband. That's more important than a ring. And I'm not talking about what kind of car he drives and what kind of house he's in. It's deeper than that. And deeper than a ring.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

DH proposed with no ring and we went to pick one up after I said yes.

That's what we did. I only wear my band unless I'm going out somewhere. I wasn't allowed to wear it at work anyway, so I just got used to being free of it.

 

[trueheartofgold]

A ring is a symbol of financial security and commitment. It's also become a part of the ritual.

I do think people should keep in mind that a lot of men presenting rings have horrible credit and tons of debt, which, to me, is not financial security. I've seen too many women with nice rings struggling financially several years into the marriage.

I want my daughter to get a ring. But I also want her to review thoroughly the finances of anyone who is a potential husband. That's more important than a ring. And I'm not talking about what kind of car he drives and what kind of house he's in. It's deeper than that. And deeper than a ring.

Yes to all of this!

 

[IslandMummy]

That's what we did. I only wear my band unless I'm going out somewhere. I wasn't allowed to wear it at work anyway, so I just got used to being free of it.

I lost my ring a month later. I have a different set now but I miss my original

 

[sgold04]

My guess is he was only able to afford those ugly rings after living with a financially stable wife.

 

[trueheartofgold]

My guess is he was only able to afford those ugly rings after living with a financially stable wife.