Have you ever confronted another believer about sin?

[inthepink]

Was reading tonite and the topic of when to confront people on sin. That if the person is a believer, that you should confront them. If they are not a believer, then you shouldn't.

So, I was just curious to know if anyone ever felt the need to confront another believe about their sin. How did it go? What did you say? And what was the reaction?

 

[Almaz]

I think this is a very interesting and Great Question that goes across ALL religious borders. Some people Diguise themselves in the cloak of Poverty to cover up their Hypocrisies.

THEY know what they are doing is wrong. So there is no confrontation there but if they are the Do as I say NOT as I do types then something needs to be said. Like my friend who calls himself a DEVOUT Muslim but yet he drinks and smokes weed but yet he is at the Mosque and he prays 5 times a day

 

[inthepink]

That's very interesting about your friend. I wonder if anyone has ever confronted him?

I'm also curious if anyone has been on the receiving end of being confronted? I am sure I have done or said something improper at some point where I needed to be confronted but I have never been.

I think this is one of those things that's a lot easier said than done.

However, there are some people who are gifted with saying virtually anything "with love."

 

[GV-NA-GI-TLV-GE-I]

It never goes easy to do such. People become resentful about it, no matter how nonjudgemental you are about it. Like drug interventions, sin-interventions lol. Folks get mad about somebody else "looking" at their life. I'd pray hard about it and just live the right example. But if it's drugs and alcohol and driving, you should definitely say something. Well, that's IMHO.

 

[mango387]

Yes. I had a dream that the person was going to die if they committed a certain sin. It was so awful that the dream woke me up immediately, but I went back to sleep. Well, actually, I couldn't rest, so I'll called the person (a relative) at 2:00 am. (BTW, I hadn't even been thinking seriously about the person before my dream).

The person was alarmed, b/c they know I don't call people like that (my mom was the one who told me in college that I could call my then SO after 10 pm. I have a self-imposed 9:00 pm phone curfew). Anyway, I told the person that I could never live w/ myself if he/she died, because I failed to do what I felt God was telling me to do. I shared my dream, and that person literally started crying on the phone. The individual told me "Thank you" because he/she had been trying to make a decision about the sin, and my dream spoke directly to what he/she was facing. There was no Jerry Springer moment or anything, because both the individual and I were too scared to even go there.

I am happy to say that person is alive and well today. I am a living witness that God won't let you rest if He has instructed you to do something. BTW, the person has never mentioned that incident again, and we are still close today.

 

[Almaz]

NO no one has confronted him except me. He is Saudi Arabian and sometimes when they are away from home they get butt arse wild. I tell him though boy you know what you are doing is WRONG WRONG WRONG. So please don't tell me house devout you are when you are out drinking smoking and chasing women.

Yeah I had a Rabbi Confront me about Driving on Shabbat one time. Telling me how I descrated that Sabbath. (Ultra-Orthodox) Rabbi was like

Almaz you are WRONG WRONG WRONG. But there was now way in hell I was going to walk ten miles just to go to the synagouge.

I told him Yeah but I dont' beat wives like your brothers does to his but YET he walks to Synagouge on Shabbat but I guess THAT is Okay.

Do you think G-d REALLY cares about that?

That's very interesting about your friend. I wonder if anyone has ever confronted him?

I'm also curious if anyone has been on the receiving end of being confronted? I am sure I have done or said something improper at some point where I needed to be confronted but I have never been.

I think this is one of those things that's a lot easier said than done.

However, there are some people who are gifted with saying virtually anything "with love."

 

[inthepink]

Interesting stories, ladies.

It actually reminded me that I HAVE confronted someone before!

I was feeling very unsettled about this bible study that I attended that was being lead by someone who I had very bad feelings about from the literal moment I met him. But not wanting to judge too soon, I put those feelings aside later to only realize what I believe the Holy Spirit warning me about someone.

Anyway, a particular situation occurred in one of the bible studies that literally kept me up that night. I couldn't sleep and couldn't stop thinking about it. I knew I couldn't go back to the study. I talked to one of my friends in there who knew I was struggling with the study b/c of the leader and she suggested that I talk to him. So I did. I confronted him with what I felt was the issue. Some things I felt were personally offending to me and other members in the group as some things were just unbiblical, from my knowledge and experience. He didn't really get it. Skirted around the issue and even continued to do more of what bothered me.

I have no ill-will towards this person but I just realized he is someone I cannot be around.

 

[Blossssom]

Ye without sin... yea.

 

[kayte]

Ye without sin... yea.

the title bothered me too, and immediately the word Pharisee and the image of the tax collector kind of came up for me...because in general...strictly speaking semantically lol {is that even a word and forgive the over allit'} that title would concern me for the same reason...no one is without sin...so I hear what you're saying....


but in reading the OP's post I get a different sense of the title though she's certainly entitled to name her thread as feels right for her ..sounds as if this issue keeps coming up for you OP about confronting people...on sin?

in this thread..it sounds though, as if there was a specific and troubling Church incident"sin" that directly and or indirectly affected her and others..and caused to question was it okay to confront the Church member involved..and if others had done so

but it was not as... I thought at first...reading the title...
generic thread validating "Christian duty to confront sinners"

I confront another believer or anybody about anything that feels innapropriate for me..
and I have been confronted as well
this includes family..friends...bfs...employers...
I do tend to be wary around Church.....
but I choose my battles..otherwise I'd ALWAYS be up in arms..and fortunately for me..so does everyone else or I'd be in the doghouse ALL the time...

everyone sins...I do ...as does the OP..everyone does things that is not right at some point in time ..just as we sometimes do get it right.

honestly?
being very very honest ..

the biggest sinner I confront on a daily basis
...is myself

 

[Blossssom]

People need to confront their mirrors first. There within is the only sinner they should be concerned about.

 

[MA2010]

People need to confront their mirrors first. There within is the only sinner they should be concerned about.

..................

 

[Blossssom]

..................

Who are we to go and confront somebody about the life they're leading?

If someone is struggling in an area which is nay to the Word of God, support that person and try to prop them up and strengthen them.

You don't confront them as if you are their prosecutor, judge and jury. Sorry

 

[Aviah]

I understood something different about that. I just thought "confront" in this context mean to say to someone, hey dude, I love ya but XYZ can't go on... Only saying it because I care about you. I've done that before and no one's gotten funny with me about it. Like Blosssom said its about not condemning. 'Cause Lord knows I'm not perfect, and if someone came up to me and said the same thing and I was wrong, hey, I'll take it with a thank you!

 

[Blossssom]

Yes, and I also imagine that the presentation would go a long way... the word "confront" is too strong. I read the OP's initial post carefully, and it sounds judgmental more than helpful.

I'm glad she asked us

 

[Nice & Wavy]

I'm sure the OP will come in and clarify what she meant. I don't think she meant what it looked like. I think she needs a break on this one

 

[Blossssom]

I'm sure the OP will come in and clarify what she meant. I don't think she meant what it looked like. I think she needs a break on this one

Only because of you and your immense beauty will she receive a pass from me... j/k... we all know the evils of the written word.

Oftentimes, things are never written the way we mean them to be...

 

[Nice & Wavy]

Only because of you and your immense beauty will she receive a pass from me... j/k... we all know the evils of the written word.

Oftentimes, things are never written the way we mean them to be...

You are a riot, Blossssom

Exactly...that's why we need to slow it down...sometimes, other people can add fuel to start a fire where it's actually not needed, ya know?

 

[Evolving78]

i wish someone would have confronted me the other day. sometimes people do need to be called on things (out of love) to help them fall back in line.

 

[Inches411]

i feel sometimes it maybe be necessary and sometimes it may not be. I think a person who wants to confront another person about a sin must pray about it first and ask god if that the right thing to do and how to go about it the right way. I mean most belivers who sin know they are sinning and know iits wrong.. for watever reason they keep doing it.. i myself in included.. i do wrong sometimes and i know it.. i really dont need no one pointing it out to me.. its something i just continually try to work on myself and get help from god with.

If this person is constnalty coming to you about a problem and you know alot of it has to do with this sin then maybe it okay to tell them. But a lot of caution must be used. I personally believe if the person is a Christian god himself will find a way to confront them about their sin. He has with me. So i have mixed feelings about this.. I am more the for no than yes.

 

[Blossssom]

It's all in the presentation, ladies...

Yes, and PLEASE pray... pray for kindness, gentleness before you approach this person. And also, if you're close to them, observe their overall behavior, beforehand.

There could be drug abuse or some other sort of abuse that makes people "not themselves".

Proceed with caution.

 

[Nice & Wavy]

It's all in the presentation, ladies...

Yes, and PLEASE pray... pray for kindness, gentleness before you approach this person. And also, if you're close to them, observe their overall behavior, beforehand.

There could be drug abuse or some other sort of abuse that makes people "not themselves".

Proceed with caution.

It's nice to see you talking this way, Blossss....

 

[Butterfly08]

honestly?
being very very honest ..

the biggest sinner I confront on a daily basis
...is myself

Amen.

 

[Blossssom]

Amen.

Yes! CHURCH DISMISSED!

Dang! It's 3:00!

That was a long service!

LOL!

 

[Blossssom]

It's nice to see you talking this way, Blossss....

Thanks, babe!

 

[Nice & Wavy]

Thanks, babe!

You have alot in you, blossss....you know I'm on it, right?

 

[kayte]

Who are we to go and confront somebody about the life they're leading?
If someone is struggling in an area which is nay to the Word of God, support that person and try to prop them up and strengthen them.
You don't confront them as if you are their prosecutor, judge and jury. Sorry

remember what you are saying to the OP because it applies to you as well

It's all in the presentation, ladies...
Yes, and PLEASE pray...pray for kindness, gentleness before you approach this person.And also, if you're close to them, observe their overall behavior, beforehand.

...pray for kindness, gentleness before you approach this person.

did you do this?

Blossom..consider taking some of your own advice regarding the OP..please.
you're convicting her without knowing WHAT she's referring to...
she came for support...and advice...not for judgement
yes the title made me uncomfortable..but that's her process..
sure...comment on it..
I did,too.
but the level of negative commentary is over the top

maybe this man made some sexual references about women..and maybe the OP is uncomfortable about confronting a male Church member..without going into detail because she wisely knows and has observed no doubt ...that people can do exactly what is being done here
taking what she's saying waaaay out of context and not only that....
blowing it waaaaaaaaaay out of proportion..

there are instances where confrontation is called and supported by
the bible.

So hey Blossom,those are great ideas you have but..your posts seem not in the spirit
or remotely aligned of your very lovely suggestions
you,Blossom can peek in the mirror,too
instead of blasting the OP

Only because of you and your immense beauty will she receive a pass from me... j/k... we all know the evils of the written word.

OKAY! reality check
She does not NEED a pass from you...
You are not God

 

[mango387]

I am not sure how I came off upthread, but I wanted to clarify something. I am not one of the more well-known posters, but in the relatively few posts that I do create "I am not a tell-the-truth, shame-the-devil type person." IRL, I don't do that either. In fact, people criticize me for sugarcoating or being nonconfrontational.

The person I talked to is someone who I love dearly. That person has been there for me when others left me hanging. I wouldn't have said anything about said action, but I couldn't sleep. I dreamed that person was dying, and I tried to reach out to the individual in the dream but it was too late. Sometimes, if you love someone, you can't be quiet. That person thanked me, and since then, the individual has called me out on something. We weren't in front of anybody or anything. I am sharing this, because I feel that we can sometimes hide behind "Ye without sin" too much. I have a few close friends who I tell "Please stop me BEFORE I run into a brick wall." A good friend tries to help you avoid brick walls in addition to holding your hand if the wall still takes you down.

 

[Inches411]

I am not sure how I came off upthread, but I wanted to clarify something. I am not one of the more well-known posters, but in the relatively few posts that I do create "I am not a tell-the-truth, shame-the-devil type person." IRL, I don't do that either. In fact, people criticize me for sugarcoating or being nonconfrontational.

The person I talked to is someone who I love dearly. That person has been there for me when others left me hanging. I wouldn't have said anything about said action, but I couldn't sleep. I dreamed that person was dying, and I tried to reach out to the individual in the dream but it was too late. Sometimes, if you love someone, you can't be quiet. That person thanked me, and since then, the individual has called me out on something. We weren't in front of anybody or anything. I am sharing this, because I feel that we can sometimes hide behind "Ye without sin" too much. I have a few close friends who I tell "Please stop me BEFORE I run into a brick wall." A good friend tries to help you avoid brick walls in addition to holding your hand if the wall still takes you down.

I cant lie, you do have a point about this one. You really do. .

 

[aribell]

I don't think there was any malice in hairlove's post at all.

In general, we confront other believers in their sin because Christianity is supposed to be a community. I would tell my sister about herself in a heartbeat, and she would do the same for me, were there something "off" in either of our lives, attitudes, etc. The Body of Christ is a family of brother and sisters of Christ.

Not everyone feels a part of the community, and not everyone confronts in love, but when there is genuine community and love and respect, then holding one another accountable is a great thing. It doesn't have anything to do with casting stones. "Faithful are the wounds of a friend."

 

[Laela]

You drive home a very good point.... Before I got saved, I remember being approached by a believer about my life, and I recall being resentful and very defensive. Who was she to tell me anything? But in hindsight, I recalled that was my way of resisting the truth about parts of my life I wasn't too happy with. It happens to all of us when God is dealing with us. A kicked dog won't yelp.

In Genesis, God had the same type of resistance when he approached Cain about his brother. We do have the responsibility of looking out for the welfare of our brothers and sisters in Christ -- with a pure heart and not a haughty one. To see another believer falter and not say anything or show any kind of love, is not Christ-like behavior. Whether they receive admonition with the bitterness of Cain or the humility of Saul, is really up to them.

People become resentful about it, no matter how nonjudgemental you are about it. Like drug interventions, sin-interventions lol. Folks get mad about somebody else "looking" at their life. I'd pray hard about it and just live the right example. But if it's drugs and alcohol and driving, you should definitely say something. Well, that's IMHO.