Yea, my BEST FRIEND, although I'm over it the friendship is just not the same. We've been friends since 5th grade, and during my freshmen year,I moved to another town and developed a relationship. I connected with this guy b/c of things going on min my household and he was sort of my refuge.
I ended up moving back and me and the guy became "friends," but I had a deep place in my heart for him and he was not into long term relationships.
In trying to let that go, my best friend hooks me up with a co- worker of hers and we instantly fall "in love." All asudden she tells me she was "infactuated" with him. I looked at her like well, what do you want me to do? Me and This Guy Were in LOVE!!! I was not mad at her, but I really didn't know what she was asking of me.
She was going to try to go to college in this town I move to, so I gave him the guy's number to get in contact with his friend to show her around.
During the summer, me and the boyfriend were having problems. My best friend approaches me, mad, because what my current boyfriend told her. I was like does it concern you? Why are you taking up for him? She said because she knew him first. I was like you were my friend first and I will respect your feelings, but anything I have good to say on him, she don't want to hear it, but she loves hearing the downside of my relationship.
Not a day went by, the same day, a classmate hears her gushing, and he wanted to know who, and for some reason i mention the guy from Arlington ( my grandma for some reason said that morning "How is Vanessa and Chris" I was like you mean Vanessa and Jimmy right?) and she looked at me like "uh-ooh." I was like okay so you just got on me about secrets ruining our friendship and she turns around and does that!! Truthfully I was trying to fight her, I literally chased her around the band hall with any object i could find, tuba, drumstick, whateva.
It split our friends in two. And it was not because of the guy. She made herself look right as rain, being all virginal. She would run up on my boyfriend and complain about me and have this twisted friendship with him where I was the target. And I blewup on a number of occasions. One time I was in drum line and one of my best friends ran up on me like Vanessa is talking to Tee, right now!!! The the friend goes after her like who are you talking to and attempts to take the phone away. I just look at her and then run outside (very cinematic, huh) and as I am trying to cool down I got people running up on me like "what you gonna do," which made me even more upset. to finally the band director lets me hideout in his office.
the thing with me was when I moved away I was abused in that time period by my father and at the time I clinged to my boyfriends and friends to create an alternative life. The guy and my math teacher were the only ones up there I told. And she dismissed me when i told her it seemed. I was going through a rough time trying to convict my dad and this "girl" could not put her pettiness aside to help a friend. I was seen as a ***** for beefing with pure Vanessa. It was a mess how I had to defend myself, not because of what happened in Arlington, only a handful knew, but because this chick was talking sideways about me trying to justify a relationship that was in my eyes and HER father wrong, not because of the guy, because what she did to me. I just needed her to be a friend.
back to the town, I let her know I did not like it but I loved her so I can deal, however, don't hurt this guy, he's very sweet and I know her type. She finally mets him and she initially doesn't like what she sees. So I tell her it's her choice, but you already know he's a great individual, so don't let physicality deter you from a blessing. and they been together ever since.
She credits me for the union. But afterwards we were never the same. I hardly speak to her. Wrote songs about her. And I will not lie, when I used to hear they had problems, I smiled inside. I know the guys shortcomings too. But i am starting to get over it and it's been 6 years since we were in highschool. But BEST FRIEND never more.
In retrospect the guy was clearly not the one for me and I am happy now but it hurts my heart my bestfriend cannot be my best friend.
I'm seriously sleep deprived and have a business meeting this evening.
I need to talk to you...will contact you this evening.
... lesson learned for her and the people that watched me do it
