Guy says No Coloring in 6 yrs

Duff

Duff

Well-Known Member
I recently dated a guy that said that he had not colored in 6 yrs. excluding the 'is he telling the truth' question. lets assume he is and I do believe he is. would you look at him differently? how? why?

eta. let's add that he's playing with a jumbo crayon.
 
I would think he is either very religious and/or closet gay.


ETA. I don't see anything wrong with it, it's a personal decision. But the above is what I would automatically believe about him.
 
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i think its admirable. as long as hes celibate b/c he wants to be and not b/c he didnt have any other option cause no one wanted to sleep w. his arse :yep:
 
I don't think anyway about it. Some people just color when they are in a relationship. Thats the case for me. Coloring is so in your face nowadays that people think there is something wrong with you if you dont have it every other day. Not the case..
 
I see not a thing wrong with it. He may be religious or just not wanting to until he find the right person or marriage.

I'm a virgin and I'm waiting...as a woman, people don't really bat an eye but if guy does it, they automatically assume something is "wrong" with him since purity is a GOOD thing for women but sexual conquests get high fived often if a guy does it.
 
I also wanted to add that he's in his 30's.

he is religious but that is not why and does not have anything to do with it. went thru a really bad divorce, is really afraid of disease (since he does not like to use condoms), and is very picky.

also eta----we dated, as in past tense. once he decided that he wanted to be with me regardless of stipulations that I decided (i.e. condoms), that 6 years caught up to him and he could not handle waiting anymore.
 
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I had a male verrrrry heterosexual friend who didn't have sex for 7 years. He became celibate because of a close friend of ours who passed from HIV.

It essentially scared him straight, because he'd been swanging his dang-a-lang all over the tri state area before our friend passed. He stayed celibate until he was in a secure and mature relationship with a great woman.
 
It's weirder for me when men (and women) engage in serial monogamy with a multitude of short terms partners over some number of years then folks who opt out for some period of time.
 
I would give him a SERIOUS side eye..That's just me, I prefer a man who enjoys and know how to rock the boat. And to me, not having used the Crayon in 6 years, that is very strange. #justkiyashrug
 
It depends on why. If it's by personal choice, I wouldn't bat an eye. If it's by circumstance, I'd wonder what it is about him that he couldn't find someone in 6 years.
 
Duff said:
I recently dated a guy that said that he had not colored in 6 yrs. excluding the 'is he telling the truth' question. lets assume he is and I do believe he is. would you look at him differently? how? why?


eta. let's add that he's playing with a jumbo crayon.
Click to expand...

No sex is better than casual sex, STDs, and being stuck with someone you don't like for the rest of your life because yo have a child.

I would not assume anything about him especially about his sexual orientation. If true it would be refreshing to see someone who values their body and health.
 
I would not hold it against him one bit. I wish I could meet a man who is not coloring until he's married. That's exactly the road I'm on at the moment.
 
Duff said:
I also wanted to add that he's in his 30's.

he is religious but that is not why and does not have anything to do with it. went thru a really bad divorce, is really afraid of disease (since he does not like to use condoms), and is very picky.

also eta----we dated, as in past tense. once he decided that he wanted to be with me regardless of stipulations that I decided (i.e. condoms), that 6 years caught up to him and he could not handle waiting anymore.
Click to expand...

If that's the case he NEEDS to stay celibate.

I personally wouldn't think anything was wrong with it. If he's celibate by choice not because no one wants to color with him that's commendable. Too many std's, unwanted/unplanned kids, etc.
 
Once you added in the fact that he doesn't like condoms, it makes perfect sense. :yep: And I'll applaud him for that - man has some sense and can control his little head.
 
JustKiya said:
Once you added in the fact that he doesn't like condoms, it makes perfect sense. :yep: And I'll applaud him for that - man has some sense and can control his little head.
Click to expand...


im impressed by the same magnitude that i would be impressed to find out that a man who has kids is taking care of them.....it's good that he is doing good, but thats what he was supposed to b doing in the first place....where is my trophy for brushing my teeth and bathing daily????
 
tailormade84 said:
im impressed by the same magnitude that i would be impressed to find out that a man who has kids is taking care of them.....it's good that he is doing good, but thats what he was supposed to b doing in the first place....where is my trophy for brushing my teeth and bathing daily????
Click to expand...


:lachen: I promise you. I could've wrote this post. :yep:
 
I wouldn't think any way about it. Well, I would feel like he was making a good decision. I would respect him for it. It seems like some people have really low opinions of men are maybe some of the ladies here can't/choose not to control themselves and so they think that when someone else does, there is something wrong with them.
If you had a female friend who had chosen to be celibate, would that be a reason for her to get a side eye from people.

Geesh. It's just like when I was 15 and working at Mcdonald's (my first job). I took orders for the drive through. Everyday, I had so many people pulling up and telling me I didn't sound black and/or complementing me on my voice/language. Now I didn't mind the complements - from those who only voiced the complements. But those who came with the "you don't sound black" or "I didn't think you were black" comments were another story.

Was it "that" different to find a black person who spoke correct English and had a nice voice? And why should it be that "different" to find a black man being sexually responsible and in control of himself? And why should those things be questioned automatically?
 
I understand. One of my male friends didn't lost his virginity until he was 24 and has gotten so much flack from his friends for it.
 
I personally did not give him flack for it and thought it was a good thing and that coloring will not be an issue here.

However, that was not the case and coloring ended up being a MAJOR issue as once he decided that he wanted to be with me he could NOT wait any longer and wanted it like immediately. it became so major that we stopped talking.
 
Its rare but certainly possible. I wouldn't think anything about him one way or the other but I would imagine that he went through something traumatic to wait that long. Ladies be honest... you know there is no man alive that is going 6 years without coloring because no one wants to be with him. Its just not happening.

Duff said:
eta. let's add that he's playing with a jumbo crayon.
Click to expand...


Also... don't take this the wrong way but the fact that you know he has a jumbo crayon makes me wonder what he is doing to satisfy his urges. As a woman, if I'm not coloring then I'm not disrobed from the waist down and I'm probably going to stop any "exploration" before it goes too far. Not because I'm a prude but I know better than to tempt myself. :look:
 
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jumbo crazyon huh?:look:

*gonna put a whole new spin on this one hea wif out a newport one hunnit*

while HE hasn't colored wif anyone in da last 6 years....whose been coloring him? maybe he's da one gettin phucked....i'm just sayin.
 
pisceschica said:
No sex is better than casual sex, STDs, and being stuck with someone you don't like for the rest of your life because yo have a child.

I would not assume anything about him especially about his sexual orientation. If true it would be refreshing to see someone who values their body and health.
Click to expand...
Exactly!

Do we want man whores or do we want a man that respects his body and/or wants to save himself for that special someone. Im confuzzled.
 
Duff said:
I personally did not give him flack for it and thought it was a good thing and that coloring will not be an issue here.

However, that was not the case and coloring ended up being a MAJOR issue as once he decided that he wanted to be with me he could NOT wait any longer and wanted it like immediately. it became so major that we stopped talking.
Click to expand...

I think that is ridiculous! He holds out 6 years and then can't be patient with you? It would make me wonder if he was lying. Also, if he wasn't lying, he still would have gotten on my last nerve with needing it "immediately." I would have stopped talking to him too.
 
I don't think it's that big a deal. It's a personal choice for a lot of people. I've gone 3 years without colouring before. I got a lot of flack from my friends and they all kept on asking me if I'm allright.
 
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You're right, Sparklingflame. I think we've been led to believe that a "real" man is one who spreads his seed all up and through the proverbial fields. Unfortunately, a lot of men think that way as well.
 
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