For the Married and the Single: Truth to This?

[loolalooh]

What do you think of this comment?

"Getting married has changed. No longer do we live in a soceity that we can leave it to " luck" or meant to be. That is all bull. Anyone in this life that has something worth sqaut will tell you that it takes, either hardwork, focus, and determination to get something that is wonderful and great.."

 

[Sosoothing]

I don't agree that marriage has changed. It has always required hardwork, focus, and determination.

 

[SmileyNY]

I'm a little confused. Is the question referring to getting married or staying married?

I don't think the rules for staying married have changed. Always required hard work.

However, getting married has changed. The proof is in the pudding. There are way more single & non-married people now than ever before.

There was a time when getting married was the #1 goal of most men and women at a certain age. Also, there was no internet. Everyone wasn't so accessible, so there were less options.

 

[MD_Lady]

"Getting married has changed. No longer do we live in a soceity that we can leave it to " luck" or meant to be. That is all bull.

And it always has been. The only thing that's changed is people's willingness to talk about making the wrong choice and to choose divorce over spending the rest of their lives in a marriage that makes them miserable.

 

[tinkat]

I think the main thing that has changed if that less people get married and value is not seen in it like before.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

Getting or staying married? I don't think getting married takes all that, for all people. But staying married takes hardwork from everybody.

 

[FlowerHair]

I don't fully agree that it takes a lot of work. The majority of the time should be easy. If it's a struggle all the time, he's not right for you. Certain situations may take a lot of work, but every year can't be a bad year.

I'm not married, but in a very LTR.

 

[hothair]

Basically trying to marry and staying married to an incompatible mate is difficult. While there are challenges in every joining if you married someone compatible to you the bad times are the exception rather than the norm and it takes work to keep it that way.

Most difficulties in marriage relationships were inevitable probably because they existed before the marriage anyway, but folk take this settling thing to a whole new level ignoring obvious flags.


In the old days similar just that society frowned more on separation so they stuck it out longer in misery.

 

[LivingInPeace]

I don't believe marriage is hard work. However, I think it's more difficult to stay married now than in the past because it's not frowned upon to give up. And now people can say they're giving up because their spouse isn't all things to them at all times. Expectations in marriage have expanded causing more factors to be dealbreakers.

People marry because of infatuation. They marry thinking the other person will always be perfect, never make mistakes and never be a fallible human. Some people want their spouse to be their lover, best friend, therapist, provider, housekeeper, chef, driver, sponsor, mother, father, child, pet. Then when they don't get all that, they say it's hard work.

 

[Fine 4s]

The definition of marriage is evolving. This forever after is fiction.
You ain't happy, bounce! Nothing lasts forever, people change, grow and sometimes don't want to grow with you. One life to live and no repeating of bible versus is going to make me stay with someone I can't grow with. I'm not saying this disentanglement would be easy as there are big consequences, family ties are broken and social stigmas and for some financial pressures etc.

That's also why I ain't having no crazy big wedding. Juuuuust in case. Just like lending money, if I can't be OK with the money spent for the wedding if we divorced, I ain't spending it.

Of course I'm single! Lol