Fake hair, fake friends???

[Tenejita10473]

(Thanks Locabouthair I am loving this site----
I have searched to see if this topic has been discussed before but I have not been able to find it, sorry in advance if it has, but....)

One day 2 friends were at my house, one whom I see often (NAN) and the other we went to school with but don't really see much (KIM). Kim complimented me on my hair and I said a simple thank you. I went to my kitchen and Nan began to giggle, Kim confused said why are you laughing. Nan proceeded to tell Kim my hair was fake.

Now I am not at alll one of those people who tries to pass off MY fake hair for real hair, because I often sport a fro one day, a twist out the next and my half wig the day after that. I like my hair to look nice and if I am going to wear fake hair I would like it to look as real as possible.

Maybe its because my friend isn't Black (which really has nothing to do with it). But I feel this was a total lack of respect, consideration and privacy. Unless I open my mouth about my hair it should be my business. Am I alone in this?

 

[missnappylady]

That was really childish of your friend. Even if she thought your hair really was fake, there was no need for her to do that. Girls can be so catty.

Did you say anything or just let it slide?

 

[sareca]

Yeah, that's not cool.

 

[Tenejita10473]

Yea she knew, because I change my hair so often and its short now. So for someone who sees me often its obvious I guess. No i haven't said anything to her as of yet, I let it slide, but I intend on saying something at some point...Not sure how to approach it.

 

[FlawedBeauty]

Yuck! What a *****! Maybe she was just jealous cuz your fake hair looks better than her real hair! That was really childish and rude of your friend!

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Kim complimented me on my hair and I said a simple thank you. I went to my kitchen and Nan began to giggle, Kim confused said why are you laughing. Nan proceeded to tell Kim my hair was fake.

Nan is janky.

I don't have friends like that anymore.

 

[Blossssom]

The other girl should have said, "so what it still looks nice". Mean girl.

 

[Keen]

You should just give her a confuse look and ask her "And your point is.....?)

 

[JustKiya]

You should just give her a confuse look and ask her "And your point is.....?)

Yeah that. Any reaction you give her would make it seem (to my eyes) that you are ashamed/hiding the fact that the hair is fake. If you aren't trying to pass off the fake hair as yours, it doesn't matter who knows that it's fake - ya know?

 

[CurleeDST]

I agree. If it is nothing to be ashamed about, why be mad she pointed it out?

Yeah that. Any reaction you give her would make it seem (to my eyes) that you are ashamed/hiding the fact that the hair is fake. If you aren't trying to pass off the fake hair as yours, it doesn't matter who knows that it's fake - ya know?

 

[Tenejita10473]

I mean, I see what you two are saying (last 2 comments) but she didn't know if that was information that I wanted put out there, so I feel if something doesn't concern you, you should keep certain info to yourself. You know hair is a serious thing for women, obviously or we all wouldn't be on LHCF.

 

[caribeandiva]

this was uncalled for. it seems to me as if NAN was trying to hurt you by diminishing/neutralizing the compliment you got. has she pulled this stunt before? if yes try to see less of her.

 

[hopeful]

this was uncalled for. it seems to me as if NAN was trying to hurt you by diminishing/neutralizing the compliment you got. has she pulled this stunt before? if yes try to see less of her.

ITA. I don't think it was so much her pointing out your hair not being real but the fact that she was giggling and that the statement came right after you got a compliment. I agree with Blosssom, she's a mean girl.

 

[Naphy]

Yes she is a mean girl ! Friends can't act like that ! I wonder why people are like that these days O_O

 

[CurleeDST]

I see where you are coming from. I felt the same way when I found out I was pregnant but didn't make major announcements and wasn't showing. I would have hated if someone else would have shared my information without my permission. Not that I was ashamed but b/c it was MY information to share not theirs. So I fully understand your point.

I would NOT make a big deal of it though. Simply talk to her in a kind and friendly way and let her know if she could refrain from telling people that bit of information on your behalf. It is all good between you two but if she could do you that favor you would be very satisfied. If she is a true friend she will respect that.

I mean, I see what you two are saying (last 2 comments) but she didn't know if that was information that I wanted put out there, so I feel if something doesn't concern you, you should keep certain info to yourself. You know hair is a serious thing for women, obviously or we all wouldn't be on LHCF.

 

[Lady Esquire]

The other girl should have said, "so what it still looks nice". Mean girl.

I have a girlfried who tries to play people out the same exact way, and I responded in those words verbatim!!!!!

Women....why are we this way?

 

[Tenejita10473]

Thanks ladies you are really helping me with this, its been on my mind from time to time. And now I think I have the courage (for lack of a better word) to confront her or shall I say point this out to her...Thanks soo much

 

[EbonyHairedPrincess]

Oh Chicki she's just hating. There is something about you that intimidates her and her only response is to hate. Shine on honey!

P.S. She is not your friend.

 

[Qetesh]

I wouldn’t say to completely count her out, it does sound bad what she did but she may have just be laughing at the fact that your other friend can not tell a weave from real hair. it wasn’t her place to call you out like that but she may just be a loud type of person who doesn’t think about how something looks b4 saying it. some people feel that all weave/wigs are just people trying to pass it off as their real hair and some women are offended by it, so when someone believed it was your real hair she may have been offended.

I don’t know for sure ? but I guess I am tryin to see a not so negative way to view your friend. I would say if she acts like this around you often to cut off the friendship.

 

[Blackoutzangel05]

I believe that the best confrontation should be been done right there. And it would have been me asking "And you felt the need to share that because"...I wear various hairstyles, changing on a daily basis and I don't believe its someone else's right to call out my weaves or what not. It seems to me, as posted by others that she was trying to belittle your compliment, maybe because Kim didn't say anything to Nan about her appearance she felt the need to say something about yours. Either way its childish!

If you say something now though it needs to be on a different approach. Simply asking why she felt the need to say something would be a great place to start.

 

[Bosslady1]

Yea she knew, because I change my hair so often and its short now. So for someone who sees me often its obvious I guess. No i haven't said anything to her as of yet, I let it slide, but I intend on saying something at some point...Not sure how to approach it.

I would let it slide now. If she does it again then you speak up. It is a little too late to tell her how you feel on that topic now. She might think she ruffled your feathers and you had it building up. Don't let her see you in that position. Let her hate!

..I wonder how her hair looks.

 

[IntoMyhair]

envy for the fact that you can change your hair when you want to and have it looking good when ever you do it

and she may or may not have to pay someone to get her hair to look half has good


haters i tell you

 

[NantanYah]

You should just give her a confuse look and ask her "And your point is.....?)

This is soooo what I would have done Don't let it bother you though. Now you know just how immature your friend is.

 

[gradygirl]

I am feelilng you on this one. About 2 weeks ago I had this sister that I work with come and compliment me on my which she had not seen in about a year because I usually have it up. She wanted to know what I did to get it to grow that long and she even asked to order a wig from a magazine that I was looking at and said she was going to order one. Well the next time she saw me I had on my half wig instead and I overheard her telling a white lady that it was a wig . I have known her for 8 years and I swear her hair has not grown 1 centimeter and its always broke off and ate up even though she has been trying to grow it out. I look at it like this I wear a wig because I choose to and as for Tweety Bird I no longer give her the time of day. If some ladies would put the energy that they spend hating on other women into improving themselves then they would feel better about themselves.

 

[prettypuff1]

Even if it is fake, it is still yours..... You paid for it right? You shoulda told her to shut her mouth