LiftedUp
Well-Known Member
*this is long*
My mother and I attend a music festival every year. It is out of the country. My mother and I do a lot of things together especially traveling.
My bf has been hinting that I don't include him on my travels after I told him about these plans. Now, we plan our trips way in advance, so everything was already booked and paid for in advance. I asked my mother and her friend (another lady) if they mind if he come along and they were ok with it so I invited him. This is one of my much cheaper trips, or should I say cheapest one. On the last day he raised a couple of issues:
Also, he refused to go the last concert because of the above because "it didn't make sense". He ended up going.
Now, at the time, I calmed him down and quelled his issues. But I was angry. I still am. I addressed part of it when we returned and told him basically that if he didn't want to come then he shouldn't have, I only invited him because he hinted it. But I am very annoyed. I planned a couple of "touristy" activities that he said he wasn't interested in so I let it go. He's an introvert, I get it. We strolled along the beach and went to the pool. We ate lunch alone every day, plus I spent 50% of the time hanging out with him either doing the aforementioned, or in his room, or in the patio of his room with him.
To me, he was acting like a big baby instead of a grown man.
He knew about the entire trip and the arrangements that were made. My mother was extremely nice to him and he spent a lot of time with us on our patio.
I want to have a discussion addressing all of the above and speaking on my feelings. At this point I don't mind walking away from everything. I'm that annoyed.
Do you think I'm blowing this entire thing out of proportion? Should I leave it alone or should I confront it? WWYD?
My mother and I attend a music festival every year. It is out of the country. My mother and I do a lot of things together especially traveling.
My bf has been hinting that I don't include him on my travels after I told him about these plans. Now, we plan our trips way in advance, so everything was already booked and paid for in advance. I asked my mother and her friend (another lady) if they mind if he come along and they were ok with it so I invited him. This is one of my much cheaper trips, or should I say cheapest one. On the last day he raised a couple of issues:
- He feels like the third wheel - my mother and I shared a room, I spent time with him during the day, at the concert and he joined all of us for breakfast and dinner, we had lunch together
- He feels as though this is me and my mother's trip and he was tagging along whereas he tries to include me with his family
- He is upset that I didn't change my departure ticket to the day after the first day of the festival (missing the first concert) to coincide with his departure - that I chose my mother over him. Please note, when I booked the tickets the same day and time was available. After he made the decision to come tickets were already sold out for the day the rest of us were going across.
- He felt like I was abandoning him because I refused to change my ticket to coincide with his and that (he refused to come on standby after I suggested it - there were also a couple of standby seats available)
- He spent a lot of money to go on this trip and used up this vacation days (he has 15 left) to be with me.
Also, he refused to go the last concert because of the above because "it didn't make sense". He ended up going.
Now, at the time, I calmed him down and quelled his issues. But I was angry. I still am. I addressed part of it when we returned and told him basically that if he didn't want to come then he shouldn't have, I only invited him because he hinted it. But I am very annoyed. I planned a couple of "touristy" activities that he said he wasn't interested in so I let it go. He's an introvert, I get it. We strolled along the beach and went to the pool. We ate lunch alone every day, plus I spent 50% of the time hanging out with him either doing the aforementioned, or in his room, or in the patio of his room with him.
To me, he was acting like a big baby instead of a grown man.
He knew about the entire trip and the arrangements that were made. My mother was extremely nice to him and he spent a lot of time with us on our patio.
I want to have a discussion addressing all of the above and speaking on my feelings. At this point I don't mind walking away from everything. I'm that annoyed.
Do you think I'm blowing this entire thing out of proportion? Should I leave it alone or should I confront it? WWYD?
. You are fine as is, just open your heart up. We all have opportunities for growth. You'll need to be a little less independent and he will need to be a little more. Hopefully you'll find a balance. If you think he may be the one, it's worth the effort. Be patient and loving toward yourself and him.
) 
