do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS?

kurlybella

kurlybella

Well-Known Member
do you just give out your number to a nice guy that you meet or do you have screener questions? i used to use the questions below as screeners, but now, depending on the situation/location that we meet, i'll ask after the first phone conversation.

and you know what, every straight up dude i've met had no problem with these questions. the shady ones did!

they are:

are you married?

are you gay or down low or any other kinda of non discriminate lover? -- where i live this is a must!!!!

do you have a child or children?

are you on probation?

answer yes to any of the above and it's a wrap.

yeah, anyone can lie, but i'd rather ask than not ask at all.
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

Who do you live with? 9 times out of 10 you're getting a cell number and can easily live with a GF or spouse... or his mama... or on a friends couch...
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

ladylady said:
do you just give out your number to a nice guy that you meet or do you have screener questions? i used to use the questions below as screeners, but now, depending on the situation/location that we meet, i'll ask after the first phone conversation.

and you know what, every straight up dude i've met had no problem with these questions. the shady ones did!

they are:
are you married?

are you gay or down low or any other kinda of non discriminate lover? -- where i live this is a must!!!! MsNadi: Where the heck do you live?

do you have a child or children? MsNadi Says: Good Question.

are you on probation? MsNadi says: Where the heck are you meeting men??

answer yes to any of the above and it's a wrap.

yeah, anyone can lie, but i'd rather ask than not ask at all.
Click to expand...

Some of the questions crack me up. You're giving a man your number - it's not a promisory note, it's your PHONE number. You can ask all this stuff during first phone conversations.

When they ask me for my number or they give me theirs, I'll ask straight up "what number is this?" And get cute with it "so, if I happen to call you at 10 PM, I'm not going to hear some woman on the other end or someone's momma yelling in the background about me calling to late".

Which usually leads to a point blank answer about one's living situation ('Nah, i don't live with my mom, or a female - i live _____') and they're dating situation ('...if I'm with someone else, since I am dating and not settled down at the moment, I'm not gonna answer the phone'). Fine.

You don't have to ask point blank questions to get point blank answers.
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

Why should I give you my number?

Do you have a girlfriend?

Do you have someone in your life who currently thinks of themselves as your girlfriend?

Do you have a BOYfriend? Are you gay? Are you sure?

Are you working?


But I usually try to get their number instead of giving mine.
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

umm why would you ask a guy if he's gay? if he were you think he would tell you?
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

lol. ia with sunbasque. as if he'd be like, "actually i think i might be...why did i ask for your number?? hmmmmm....thanks for allowing me to see the light" *skips away*

er, idontthinkso.

um, if he's getting my numbers, it's because we've been talking in person. i dont think i've ever just given a guy my number because he asked randomly (like at a club/party). so there arent any "mandatory" questions i ask. & i know around here, a guy would be looking at me like :perplexed if i tried to ask if he was gay before giving him my number...
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

sometimes i give my number other times i take his number, either way i normally ask these questions around the first or second phone call more often than not.

i always ask because i've met guys that came out and said no, not gay but bisexual. so imma keep asking.

i live where there are at LOT of gay and DL men. LOTS!

but trust, i ask the white and other ones too. i don't discriminate.
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

Nope. I don't ask any questions before giving out my number. I usually wait until they call to start my "interview" :lachen:
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

i believe im going to start taking the guys number instead but some expect me to give them my number...but i think im just going to take their number
OT:
the last idiot i met and we exchanged numbers ..well the idiot texted me talking about "how could he be cool with me with no strings attached and lets not make it complicated".. yea i cut that fool off bcuz he tried to make it sound like i misunderstood what he meant yea right..boy i tell u..

i really dont jump into asking a million questions until we are on the phone..but sometimes i will go in and start asking if he has a girlfriend etc.
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

sunbasque said:
umm why would you ask a guy if he's gay? if he were you think he would tell you?
Click to expand...

some will

and even in indirect ways if not directly

question "are you bi?"

answer "if you want me to be" '"if thats what you like" "you into dudes who are"...they will answer along those lines alot of times from my experience
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

i always ask guys i'm interested in if they have been or currently are serial killers/rapists:lachen:
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

do you just give out your number to a nice guy that you meet or do you have screener questions?
Yes. I ask how old they are first and foremost, and a few casual questions about their education and music interests. Nothing to heavy. lol.
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

I just think all that is EXTRA.
who are you?
are you gay?
have you ever killed someone?
are you psycho?
do you live with your mom?
are you married?
what's your credit score?

That's just wayyyy too extra. Y'all are OD'ing. First and foremost it sends a MAJOR signal to homeboy that you have been burned severely in the past by at least one (and possible all) of the above- which means that some kinda way- those types of men are attracted to you. This not only says a lot about you, it also says quite a lot about your judgement and most of the guys that I know (that want a woman of quality) will see red flags, excess baggage, and drama and R-U-N not walk, the other way.

Now, if it's just some street holla where the dude likes what he sees and decides y'all need to be a couple, he doesn't get my number. Men of character don't pick up women this way. That's the first filter.

9.9 times out of 10, when a decent guy asks me for my number, it's after we've already held a full conversation and are basically about to part ways for the afternoon or evening. In this case, after already learning a little about him I use my discernment and give him the digits (or not) based on that. That's the second filter.

Now the rest of these extreme filters come in conversations later. Some come earlier, some later (like right about the time you think you may want to pursue a relationship).

This has worked very well for me because 1) I tend to filter people out automatically (by a number of means) and I won't really carry on too much of a convo (so as to open any "give me your number" doors) if the guy doesn't make it past my filters.

By the time some guy does- he tends not to be involved with the drama that I listed at the top (in those FBI questions) LMAO. Jokingly is one thing, but you can NOT turn all of those questions into a joke (i.e- Do you have AIDS?) just doesn't strike my funny bone.
Not that that's not important, but um- I wouldn't go by his words anyway and unless you're planning on sleeping with this guy *that just asked you for your number* that same night, you don't need to know that. Y'all can go get tested together when you're ready for that part of your relationship.
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

amara11 said:
I just think all that is EXTRA.
who are you?
are you gay?
have you ever killed someone?
are you psycho?
do you live with your mom?
are you married?
what's your credit score?

That's just wayyyy too extra. Y'all are OD'ing. First and foremost it sends a MAJOR signal to homeboy that you have been burned severely in the past by at least one (and possible all) of the above- which means that some kinda way- those types of men are attracted to you. This not only says a lot about you, it also says quite a lot about your judgement and most of the guys that I know (that want a woman of quality) will see red flags, excess baggage, and drama and R-U-N not walk, the other way.

Now, if it's just some street holla where the dude likes what he sees and decides y'all need to be a couple, he doesn't get my number. Men of character don't pick up women this way. That's the first filter.

9.9 times out of 10, when a decent guy asks me for my number, it's after we've already held a full conversation and are basically about to part ways for the afternoon or evening. In this case, after already learning a little about him I use my discernment and give him the digits (or not) based on that. That's the second filter.

Now the rest of these extreme filters come in conversations later. Some come earlier, some later (like right about the time you think you may want to pursue a relationship).

This has worked very well for me because 1) I tend to filter people out automatically (by a number of means) and I won't really carry on too much of a convo (so as to open any "give me your number" doors) if the guy doesn't make it past my filters.

By the time some guy does- he tends not to be involved with the drama that I listed at the top (in those FBI questions) LMAO. Jokingly is one thing, but you can NOT turn all of those questions into a joke (i.e- Do you have AIDS?) just doesn't strike my funny bone.
Not that that's not important, but um- I wouldn't go by his words anyway and unless you're planning on sleeping with this guy *that just asked you for your number* that same night, you don't need to know that. Y'all can go get tested together when you're ready for that part of your relationship.
Click to expand...

I didn't want to say it, but based on some of these questions I'd have to question some ladies - where the heck are you meeting men and what are you doing to attract men where it requires within 2.5 seconds of meeting them 'have you ever had tendencies towards another male'... SERIOUSLY?!?

Granted, I know it - HIV/AIDS/DL behavior is on the rise and is a serious concern to women (especially depending on your area), but this is a PHONE NUMBER, not a promise to marry....
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

All I really ask is are you married or do you have a girlfriend. All I'm giving you is my phone number which is only leading to another conversation, not an offer of marriage.

If a man asked me a whole bunch of crazy, extra mess just to ask for my phone number, please believe he wouldn't be getting it. My first thought would be that he has dealt with a bunch of crazies in the past and that I need to stay away from him. :perplexed
 
Last edited:
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

MizAvalon said:
All I really ask is are you married or do you have a girlfriend. All I'm giving you is my phone number which is only leading to another conversation, not an offer of marriage.

If a man asked me a whole bunch of crazy, extra mess just to ask for my phone number, please believe he wouldn't be getting it. My first thought would be that he has dealt with a bunch of crazies in the past and that I need to stay away from him. :perplexed
Click to expand...


Basically. Going about it in this manner has never let me down.
I look at it as we are just friends and I'm not signing up to get married tomorrow to this joker so all those questions are going to get answered eventually. With my female friends, I didn't have to get all gully with questions and still learned alot about them. Same things for guys.


People can and will to lie regardless, its their actions that speak louder for me. Give them enough rope, and they will hang themselves.
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

i just make sure dude is single that is all. i will figure it all out later
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

MsNadi said:
I didn't want to say it, but based on some of these questions I'd have to question some ladies - where the heck are you meeting men and what are you doing to attract men where it requires within 2.5 seconds of meeting them 'have you ever had tendencies towards another male'... SERIOUSLY?!?

Granted, I know it - HIV/AIDS/DL behavior is on the rise and is a serious concern to women (especially depending on your area), but this is a PHONE NUMBER, not a promise to marry....
Click to expand...

I'm sorry but the amount of men on the downlow have me seriously concerned. I've had a boyfriend who turned out to be gay but never bothered to let me know that, it was a LONG time ago and I've since forgiven and we're friends (seeing as how we were best friends before we dated).

If it's a request for a phone number, then that means that you're aiming for this to go somewhere. Not necessarily marriage, but I'm assuming at least dating, even if casual. I would love if men were honest and upfront but they're usually not. Would I ask it before I give my number? No, because I take numbers I don't give them. But I sure as hell would have questions of all sorts in the back of my mind regardless.
 
Re: do you have any MANDATORY QUESTIONS you ask a guy BEFORE YOU GIVE OUT YOUR DIGITS

i ask

age?
married/dating?
gay?
arrest record?

Granted I can ask them this on the phone after the initial convo, but why waste my time if i know what i am not interested in
 
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