DH as Best Friend?
- Thread starter beebstt
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Briabiggles
Well-Known Member
I think it's healthy as long as you aren't each other's only friends.
FH is hands down my best friend. There is no one I'd rather spend time with than him. I know I can depend on him for anything. I can talk to him about anything. He's there for me 100% percent and I for him.
Sent from my iPad mini mini.
FH is hands down my best friend. There is no one I'd rather spend time with than him. I know I can depend on him for anything. I can talk to him about anything. He's there for me 100% percent and I for him.
Sent from my iPad mini mini.
jamaicasmodona
Well-Known Member
Crystalicequeen123
Well-Known Member
I'm not married yet, but I would want my husband to be my best friend...or at least my best GUY friend. 
There may be some female friends that I just know for a longer period of time, but ultimately my ideal would be for my husband to be my good FRIEND.
I think marriages based on friendships last the longest and have the most staying power.
I don't want to be married to a guy just out of "convenience". I want to GENUINELY be into him and like him as a spouse AND as a friend.
There may be some female friends that I just know for a longer period of time, but ultimately my ideal would be for my husband to be my good FRIEND. I think marriages based on friendships last the longest and have the most staying power.
I don't want to be married to a guy just out of "convenience". I want to GENUINELY be into him and like him as a spouse AND as a friend.
Miss617
Always left of center
Even though I'm hesitant to call my DH my best friend, I know he is. We were friends before we started dating and still enjoy the same silly stuff we did then. We have a very comfortable, easy-going relationship (for the most part) that feels more like just hanging out with a buddy than a marriage. But he is not my only friend, and I am not his.
Crystalicequeen123
Well-Known Member
See...I like this type of relationship.
I would want my future hubby to have been friends w/me first, or at least have things in common with me before we start dating.
Miss617
Always left of center
See...I like this type of relationship.
It's definitely worked for us so far. We've only been married a little over a year, but together for eight, and I think that friendship is a big part of why we've lasted so long.
hunnychile
Well-Known Member
I would never say my significant other was my best friend just bc in my mind I can't really tell the two apart to comment. Who is in a relationship with someone they wouldnt consider a close friend in the first place? There are a lot of characteristic there that overlap.
SmileyNY
Well-Known Member
Of course, as women, we have our best girlfriends and that's healthy.
However If you think about what it really means to be a best friend... what it TRULY means... there's no better person for the job than your partner.
If your partner isn't your best friend, then idk if he's the one. There shouldn't be anyone else you feel more comfortable sharing things with and being around.
You can CALL another person your best friend all you want
I don' t think there's anything wrong with that. But at the end of the day, when all of the I's are dotted and the t's crossed... your partner should be the one that best fits the description.
However If you think about what it really means to be a best friend... what it TRULY means... there's no better person for the job than your partner.
If your partner isn't your best friend, then idk if he's the one. There shouldn't be anyone else you feel more comfortable sharing things with and being around.
You can CALL another person your best friend all you want
I don' t think there's anything wrong with that. But at the end of the day, when all of the I's are dotted and the t's crossed... your partner should be the one that best fits the description.
CaliiSwagg
Well-Known Member
This.
And in all honesty, I don't have a "best friend" at all. I'm close to A variety of people in a variety of different ways, but i don't have one person that trumps everyone in everything.
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TayMac
Well-Known Member
Yes they can/should be your best friend but you shouldn't rely on them for all your friend needs. We need other people we can enjoy spending our time with, other outlets Everyone has a unique personality but most of us need space.
That keeps the passion and energy going in the relationship. That's my take.
That keeps the passion and energy going in the relationship. That's my take.
ScorpioBeauty09
Well-Known Member
I prefer to be friends first so I want to feel like my DH is my friend in addition to being my life partner. I want to like him AND love him.
That said my DH could never replace my girlfriends, two of whom have been in my life for a decade. So I'd want us to be best friends but not each others' ONLY friend.
That said my DH could never replace my girlfriends, two of whom have been in my life for a decade. So I'd want us to be best friends but not each others' ONLY friend.
LunadeMiel
Well-Known Member
DH is my best friend. I know outside of family he's the only one that I trust 100%. I never have question his intentions.
ChasingBliss
Well-Known Member
Amazingly after all we have been through, I have to say that dh and I are getting to this point too. Initially I didnt even consider him friendable
...he was just my crazy behind husband. My issues are well documented here. Now we are at a place where we getting closer. HOWEVER, my best friend will always be female. No one understands a woman like another woman. A man/ hubby is cool and all but he CANNOT be my only friend.
Britt
Well-Known Member
Amazingly after all we have been through, I have to say that dh and I are getting to this point too. Initially I didnt even consider him friendable
Now we are at a place where we getting closer. HOWEVER, my best friend will always be female. No one understands a woman like another woman. A man/ hubby is cool and all but he CANNOT be my only friend.
I am sooo glad to hear this!
I know you've been through some really rough patches with your DH.
Brwnbeauti
Well-Known Member
This is how I feel.
hopeful
Well-Known Member
What PP said^^ DH is best friend then when he gets the glazed guy look when I'm on a rant he can't id with I call my sister
Yes, that glazed look
. It's good to have a few good girlfriends. I have a best girlfriend. I call her my BFF, but my dh is my homey. I lost my mom this year and it wasn't until then that I realized just how much he loves me and how much I could count on him. He said and continues to say things that soothe my aching, broken heart. He did and continues to do things no one else did or does. I like having a best gf and him. Like previously stated, dh shouldn't be your only friend. But he can be your best friend or the most important friend.
C@ssandr@
formerly known as "keyawarren"
Amazingly after all we have been through, I have to say that dh and I are getting to this point too. Initially I didnt even consider him friendable
Now we are at a place where we getting closer. HOWEVER, my best friend will always be female. No one understands a woman like another woman. A man/ hubby is cool and all but he CANNOT be my only friend.
...And this is why I believe DH as a "best friend" is a little bit idealistic. should he be one of my closest friends? For sure! I'm not married, so by the time that happens, he couldn't possibly catch up with my actual bff of 17 years. Wayyy too much history to compete.
eta: the type of intimacy you share with your partner vs. your closest friends is different. It's not comparable imo.
tinkat
Well-Known Member
I guess it all about perspective because I have female bestfriends but then my fiancé doesn't consider his close male friends his bestfriends. I thought that was odd initially but as I got to know him I understood. I would say are you sure you and so and so not bestfriends bc you guys seem close. He thinks it is odd for him to call a man his best friend, they are friends but he believes his wife should be his bestfriend...there is a balance between a man and woman (ying/yang). He started calling me his bestfriend as we hit that 2 year mark which was a shock to me bc he is not into that BFF labeling lol. Of course it's important to have relationships outside of your relationship with your spouse but I couldn't marry, wake up day after day, have and raise children with someone who is not my best friend because there will be days where we will not like each other.
Joigirl
Well-Known Member
My husband is my best friend. Most of the marriages that last are between people that are friends as well as lovers. I never thought that my husband would replace my friends either, but he has. I can talk to him about anything (he might just nod and smile when I talk about hair, but I have girlfriends for that convo).
When I'm down or mad or happy, he knows it as soon as I walk in the room. I'm going to London for business and guess who is going to tag along, my bestie and I wouldn't have it any other way. In a marriage you go through some ish but if you don't have friendship, it's harder to rekindle the flame when infatuation fades and reality slaps you in the face.
When I'm down or mad or happy, he knows it as soon as I walk in the room. I'm going to London for business and guess who is going to tag along, my bestie and I wouldn't have it any other way. In a marriage you go through some ish but if you don't have friendship, it's harder to rekindle the flame when infatuation fades and reality slaps you in the face.
My husband is my very best friend. We are very close, like being around each other, laugh a lot, and for the most part, understand each other better than anyone else.
But as others have stated, when I need a woman's perspective on something, I'll call one of my sisters.
But as others have stated, when I need a woman's perspective on something, I'll call one of my sisters.
