Dealing with a desperate man I believe.

[TayMac]

I will try to make this short.

I met a nice guy (meets most of my requirements) when I was shopping in 2007. We dated for a little bit, I met some of his friends, some family, intimate a couple of times, and I made the well-known mistake of not talking status beforehand. He gives me the "I don't want to rush and things not work out" spiel. So I go my own way seeing he's not wanting what I'm wanting.

He continued to text/call at various times and makes attempts to see me and I blew him off and was basically rude and blunt saying "leave me alone and you had your chance."

FF to the present and I'm still getting the infrequent calls/texts which I decide are just to feel me out and see what my status is. Of course I'm stiillll single and I give in and talk to him. THIS time he's says he is ready for the serious and I'm very nonchalant about it remembering the past.

When I talk to him I get the feeling he is desperate and it's like I'm his last hope at finding someoneerplexed. Everytime we talk it's "I want to see you on your terms...it doesn't matter what we do..anytime with you is better than none blah blah blah. I say that I don't have much free time and it's hard to get a sitter and he even suggest kid friendly places so my daughter can come too. So I'm like..hmmm are you really that interested or desperate?

Side notes: I have a kid and he doesn't. We live an hour apart.

 

[brownelovely]

Why not give it a chance? People do change and plus it wouldn't hurt to just go out and have fun including your daughter.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

Maybe he feels sorry about what he did to you. Some men realize the fact after they lost a good woman.

 

[TayMac]

Good points ladies.

 

[Magnolia85]

Maybe he feels sorry about what he did to you. Some men realize the fact after they lost a good woman.

What she said, give him a second chance.

 

[AstroQueen77]

I don't know. it does sound like your his last option......

 

[zenith]

I don't know. it does sound like your his last option......

i was thinking the same thing.

also it could be that he lost the 'other chic" he was hoping for hence coming back to you with a vengence.

I want a man to be with me cause he lovse me, finds me sexy, sees me as his wife and mother to his kids not cause it's better than being single.

he gets a triple side-eye with cheese from me.

 

[Blessed_Angel]

Maybe he feels sorry about what he did to you. Some men realize the fact after they lost a good woman.

It could be that.

But, I don't know...he seems a bit unstable to me. He could be wanting some loving and just trying to be "nice" so that he could get it. If you feel like it, you could go out and meet in public places. But just to get out and have fun. It doesn't sound like you're really into him anyway.

 

[TayMac]

i was thinking the same thing.

also it could be that he lost the 'other chic" he was hoping for hence coming back to you with a vengence.

I want a man to be with me cause he lovse me, finds me sexy, sees me as his wife and mother to his kids not cause it's better than being single.

he gets a triple side-eye with cheese from me.

That's definitely possible. I hadn't thought of that.

It could be that.

But, I don't know...he seems a bit unstable to me. He could be wanting some loving and just trying to be "nice" so that he could get it. If you feel like it, you could go out and meet in public places. But just to get out and have fun. It doesn't sound like you're really into him anyway.

I did basically lose the big interest after the first round but I still like him . He's a basic good guy IMO. Sex-wise..he already got his samples and I'm not giving anymore away..not to say that isn't part of his motive. I point blank told him a recent convo that I only date marriage-minded men and I'm not wasting my time on crap.

 

[Blessed_Angel]

I did basically lose the big interest after the first round but I still like him . He's a basic good guy IMO. Sex-wise..he already got his samples and I'm not giving anymore away..not to say that isn't part of his motive. I point blank told him a recent convo that I only date marriage-minded men and I'm not wasting my time on crap.

Yeah, I know you like him, if not, you wouldn't have been wondering what's up with him. Maybe he likes you too, but it's hard to commit when you're getting mixed signals. I guess you can just take it slow; and be careful.

I'm glad you're letting him know what you want. I hope he doesn't waste your time.

 

[chocolat79]

I say go out with him and feel him out. You've already played by "The Rules" and it seems like the ball is definitely in your court, so you have the advantage.

Yes, he could be desperate, yes, you could be 2nd choice or whatever, but you seem like you're smart enough to discern his real intentions. You've cut him loose before when you weren't getting what you wanted/needed from him, so I don't see any problems with seeing where he's coming from.

Previously, the timing could've been wrong. Men are all about timing (I'm slowly learning), so maybe he wasn't ready to give you what you wanted, but now he's ready.Or it could be any number of reasons. Who knows?

Just go out and find out and if he's still playing the same ol' games, you'll know it right off and this can be THE LAST time you deal with ol' boy.

There have been sooo many threads about women not finding anybody and now you have someone who POSSIBLY has potential and everybody is stating the negative.

Give dude a chance....and if doesn't work out, it doesn't work out and you don't have to wonder.

Just my $.02

 

[TayMac]

I say go out with him and feel him out. You've already played by "The Rules" and it seems like the ball is definitely in your court, so you have the advantage. True I do feel like I have the upper hand at this point.

Yes, he could be desperate, yes, you could be 2nd choice or whatever, but you seem like you're smart enough to discern his real intentions. You've cut him loose before when you weren't getting what you wanted/needed from him, so I don't see any problems with seeing where he's coming from.

Previously, the timing could've been wrong. Men are all about timing (I'm slowly learning), so maybe he wasn't ready to give you what you wanted, but now he's ready.Or it could be any number of reasons. Who knows?

Just go out and find out and if he's still playing the same ol' games, you'll know it right off and this can be THE LAST time you deal with ol' boy.

There have been sooo many threads about women not finding anybody and now you have someone who POSSIBLY has potential and everybody is stating the negative.

Give dude a chance....and if doesn't work out, it doesn't work out and you don't have to wonder. Yeah, I would hate to wonder what could have been.

Just my $.02

I appreciate your 2cents.

 

[Lovelylife]

I would just wait for awhile. Men like him are irritating

 

[TayMac]

LOL! ok then.

 

[scorpio70]

My ex married his second choice and they are doing just fine. So, don't get hung up on that...as long as he treats u with respect, go for it.

 

[TayMac]

^^That's good! He definitely treats me with the utmost respect and I don't feel like the 2nd choice at all.

 

[Bachelorette]

I.

Previously, the timing could've been wrong. Men are all about timing (I'm slowly learning), so maybe he wasn't ready to give you what you wanted, but now he's ready.Or it could be any number of reasons. Who knows?

Just go out and find out and if he's still playing the same ol' games, you'll know it right off and this can be THE LAST time you deal with ol' boy.

There have been sooo many threads about women not finding anybody and now you have someone who POSSIBLY has potential and everybody is stating the negative.

Give dude a chance....and if doesn't work out, it doesn't work out and you don't have to wonder.

Agreed

 

[Kurlee]

That's definitely possible. I hadn't thought of that.



I did basically lose the big interest after the first round but I still like him . He's a basic good guy IMO. Sex-wise..he already got his samples and I'm not giving anymore away..not to say that isn't part of his motive. I point blank told him a recent convo that I only date marriage-minded men and I'm not wasting my time on crap.

 

[TayMac]

^^I mean it too!