Craziest Conversation I've Ever Had on a Dating Webite (Anndd Go!)

[kblc06]

I don't even know why I bothered, but here goes. This guy starts messaging me via IM and it goes as follows. It's incredibly ironic as Indians, Middle-Eastern men, and Hispanics are the most likely ones to hit up my profile. Dude, it says I'm black on my page. Not black+other, or black+Grand Jeep Cherokee . I tried to spit a lil bit of knowledge but I think it fell on deaf ears. And he had the nerve to ask me to meet tonight . I took a screenshot, but I couldn't paste all of the convo

Him: r u indian?

Me: no i'm not
do i look it

Him: you mean feather indian or dot indian?
Me: either, there's an reason you asked- it says black on my page
Him: well i thought you were feather indian

Him: you know casino indian
Him: lol
Me: i wish i had casino money lol

Him: so you're just brown?
Me: black yes
Him: like you're an african american?
Him: but all of us are mixed with something arent we
Me:that's what it says on my profile
Him: and you like african americans?
Me: well of course but i don't discriminate

Him: but no i mean
Him: do you like the african american culture?
Me: ummm yes, we have a very rich cultural legacy in this country. not just what you see in mainstream media and hip hop videos

Him: i agree that africans have a rich cultural legacy. but african americans can come off rather different
Me: it just depends on who you've been exposed to. one could say the same for asians or arabs too
one shouldn't stereotype
Him: yeah but
Him: there are always dominant features in an ethnicity
Him: like we persians
tend to have certain qualities, that apply to most of us statistically speaking

Me: physically or culturally? I would think the history of AAs is one that's entirely different from voluntary immigrant groups, especially considering the laws that kept us oppressed have only been repealed within the last 3 to 4 decades. (not counting profiling)
Him: right, but still there is a persistence with vulgar language and apparel within AAs, statistically compared to other ethnicities

Me: that may be what's presented as mainstream, but that's definitely not the reality for AAs like myself or many others that I know. It's what's considered "marketable" but it would be foolish to believe that a certain aspect of a culture encompasses all 40 million of us
Him: again, statistically speaking, is more present in AAs
like *** hanging out of pants
statistically you see that more among AAs
Him: do you disagree?


Me: if I were to believe everything that is presented statistically about people of middle eastern descent I would believe that they were all religious zealots who have a tendencies towards violence against women and suicide bombers
Me: but that wouldn't be true would it
Me: and yes i would disagree
Him: i actually would say, that statistically speaking, middle eastern men abuse their women, more so than other ethnicities
Him: stereotyping is bad, but we should not erase a problem if it is persistent within an ethnicity
Me: I can agree with that but there are lots of different variables at play that would explain the prevalence of a particular behavior

Him: so what is the main reason or reasons behind the different attitude and language portrayed by some AAs?

Me: poverty, lack of exposure to different societal norms, etc
but I can only speak for myself because as one individual out of millions, I can't possibly begin to explain the behavior another person simply because we share the same complexion
Me: I wouldn't expect you to act as the spokesperson for all Persians or Iranians

 

[kblc06]

Screenshot of part of the convo:

 

[weaveadiva]

Him: r u indian?

Me: no i'm not
do i look it

Him: you mean feather indian or dot indian?
Me: either, there's an reason you asked- it says black on my page
Him: well i thought you were feather indian

Him: you know casino indian
Him: lol

And this would have been the end of our conversation.

Never mind the fact that this fool approached you spewing stereotypes about black people from the start and trying to get you to separate yourself from "those people."

Boy bye.

 

[Abibi]

So black folks have a higher propensity for vulgar language and the sort? What a twit. Lol... are we allowed to say twit?

 

[kblc06]

And this would have been the end of our conversation.

Never mind the fact that this fool approached you spewing stereotypes about black people from the start and trying to get you to separate yourself from "those people."

Boy bye.

@weaveadiva Ya know.. It should've been but have you ever experienced witnessing a car accident or train wreck and were unable to look away. Yeah, that's what this was . I'm sittin' here like who does that, where they do this at . And you have the audacity to think imma bone you after you insulted my race?! ********* :crazy:. Just goes to show, just because someone is racist doesn't mean they won't smash if given the opportunity to hit. Boys are stupid

And he had the nerve to say Africans had a rich cultural legacy but not AAs (I don't want no drama yall, but that just stood out to me)

 

[larry3344]

Good job you handled that extremely well,as for what he intended and expected from you it was pretty clear!!! Rossboss has said it many times watch out for those other minority races they can be the worse with it because they think cause they are not white they'll get a pass. I don't play that game, you are not black that is all I need to know couldn't care less.

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

Ugh, that **** really wanted you to say you weren't black lol

 

[Foxglove]

Persians are some of the biggest man whores, sexists, and misogynists I've ever met. But that would be stereotyping wouldn't it

 

[Ogoma]

You did well. You dropped some knowledge and something definitely stuck.

Did he just admit to being predisposed to violence towards women?

 

[beebstt]

you should have listed some negative persian (cough iranian) stereotypes (google)

 

[ScorpioBeauty09]

And after all that he wanted to go out LOL. Reminds me of a date I had with an Indian guy who was Hindu but claimed he respected all religions. He near about saw red when I told her my mom is Muslim and started questioning why she was Muslim. He was hurt when I told him it wasn't up for discussion and actually asked to see me again. Boy bye.

Did this guy actually admit most Middle Eastern men are religious zealots who abuse their wives? Well if so, why would you or any other woman ever go out with him? What an idiot.

 

[intergalacticartist]

@weaveadiva Ya know.. It should've been but have you ever experienced witnessing a car accident or train wreck and were unable to look away. Yeah, that's what this was . I'm sittin' here like who does that, where they do this at . And you have the audacity to think imma bone you after you insulted my race?! ********* :crazy:. Just goes to show, just because someone is racist doesn't mean they won't **** if given the opportunity to hit. Boys are stupid

And he had the nerve to say Africans had a rich cultural legacy but not AAs (I don't want no drama yall, but that just stood out to me)

This is the sh!t I don't get. You obviously don't respect this person or their culture, but you still want to sleep with them?

You can't find someone you actually like? You that hard up? MAN. HE BETTA GWON HEAD!

 

[DrC]

Him: r u indian?

Me: no i'm not
do i look it

Him: you mean feather indian or dot indian?
Me: either, there's an reason you asked- it says black on my page
Him: well i thought you were feather indian

Him: you know casino indian
Him: lol
Me: i wish i had casino money lol

Him: so you're just brown?
Me: black yes
Him: like you're an african american?

This reminds me of men (black men included) who just won't accept the fact a person is black. I remember when I went to visit my SO's fam for thanksgiving in this extremely small town and his uncle blatantly asked me "What are you?"

It was off putting because that is a rude and inconsiderate question to ask. Everyone stopped eating at the table in suspense to hear my answer. I told him I was black. And then he says, "Yes, I know that, but what else are you?"
I'm not about to go into my damn lineage because you can't accept my answer. He wasn't going for it and for me to be put on front street was quite embarrassing erplexed

you can't be all black with those freckles.
you can't be all with that skin tone.
you can't be all black with those features.
you can't be all black with that hair.

So embarrassing. I couldn't wait to leave that small butt backwards town.

 

[intergalacticartist]

It's probably because they find you attractive and they can't wrap their head around an attractive black woman

 

[FelaShrine]

Him: i actually would say, that statistically speaking, middle eastern men abuse their women, more so than other ethnicities

Least he aint deny it.

Hopefully OP unlike some people you wont go looking for his "compansionship" despite this.

 

[Curlee_lurker]

This is the main reason I can't do online dating. Racist others that say crazy stuff drives me insane.

Some man sent me a message asking if I liked to give bj's. That was the only message. I sent him one back cussing him out and asked him if he liked to give rimjobs and blocked him. Unbeknownst to me his message could still come through and he offered to. Wtf

Got a message from a white guy that said he loves black women but was having a hard time finding one. I think anyone with a preference outside of their own kind is weird but I asked questions because his location was in a more ethnically diverse town than me. He proceeds to tell me that it's hard to find a good one because black women are angry, gold digging sluts that refuse to stay faithful and this had not only been confirmed by personal experience, but the black women he's dated have cosigned this foolery. I told him that his views are disturbing and that I hope he finds the type of dumb c word (ends in a n) that would find something like that flattering. Months later he sent a message saying hi.

There have been others. The 67 yr old trying to get laid, the guy that said he likes kids so women with young kids are preferential (wish I could have called the police), the ones that have asked nasty questions ect. I get a high volume of messages but barely respond because there is a bunch of weirdo types.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

What in the entire Forestry is he talking about? Where are these statistics he keeps talking about? Who published them? Why is he upset that you're AA and don't fit in.his box of what you "should" be?

 

[bigtina74]

I still remember this dude from way back in the black planet days who used to visit my page constantly but never say anything. He approached me on yahoo messenger acting like he randomly ran across me, but as soon as I saw the pic, I knew exactly who he was.

Anyway, we're chatting and this dude hit me with some line talking about he's lonely and just wants someone to cuddle and he doesn't even want sex, just a warm body near him. I semi jokingly told him he sounded soft.

And he went straight off on me talking about black bishes can't have ish, that I was poor, and that all black women have HIV and that he's glad I showed my true colors because he just wanted to give me the d*ck and he would have caught HIV from me.

The most hilarious part was this dude actually contacted me again about six months later, this time actually on Blackplanet and tried to act as if JUST ran across my profile. When I told him I remembered who he was he lost the charming demeanor and reverted back to insults about HIV and black women


But did this dude really send me a Facebook friend request like three years later? I dont even know how he found me. And he wrote a ghetto novela about HIV. I swear he has it and blames a black woman for giving it to him

 

[BelleCauchemar]

You should go out with him.

 

[kblc06]

This reminds me of men (black men included) who just won't accept the fact a person is black. I remember when I went to visit my SO's fam for thanksgiving in this extremely small town and his uncle blatantly asked me "What are you?"

It was off putting because that is a rude and inconsiderate question to ask. Everyone stopped eating at the table in suspense to hear my answer. I told him I was black. And then he says, "Yes, I know that, but what else are you?"
I'm not about to go into my damn lineage because you can't accept my answer. He wasn't going for it and for me to be put on front street was quite embarrassing erplexed

you can't be all black with those freckles.
you can't be all with that skin tone.
you can't be all black with those features.
you can't be all black with that hair.

So embarrassing. I couldn't wait to leave that small butt backwards town.

It's unfortunate, but I've had the same experience with some black men. It's almost as if their disappointed that you're not an exotical
.

It's probably because they find you attractive and they can't wrap their head around an attractive black woman

But, my thing is why you argue someone down about their own heritage. It's like some people experience cognitive dissonance when they encounter an attractive, intelligent black person . It's bananas, but I had never experienced something so freakin' bold!

Least he aint deny it.

Hopefully OP unlike some people you wont go looking for his "compansionship" despite this.

Come on Fela, I thought you knew me a bit better. This dude has made da band . Didn't he just admit that he'd mollywhop a chick?! I ain't about that Rhianna, Tina Turner, Chanel Iman life

 

[kblc06]

Ok yall, this may sound racist or stuck up but ....why do broke down *** white men who barely graduated high school with 2 kids living in a trailer park they share with their mama-auntie always want to hit you up. Or maybe it just happens to me. It's like they know that there's no way in hades a WW would want them, but maybe a BW may be desperate enough to. I'm sorry, but if I'm swirling I'm looking for a come-up . You can't be white and broke. Just turrible

 

[FelaShrine]

Come on Fela, I thought you knew me a bit better. This dude has made da band . Didn't he just admit that he'd mollywhop a chick?! I ain't about that Rhianna, Tina Turner, Chanel Iman life

Of course girl just throwing some shade cos the same happened to someone 'ere with a latino dude and excuses were made fon her behalf or his beliefs

 

[kblc06]

Of course girl just throwing some shade cos the same happened to someone 'ere with a latino dude and excuses were made fon her behalf or his beliefs

Say word!? (thread please, I'm nosy and bored)

 

[SincerelyJane]

One dude messaged me he was really explicit and adamant about wanting fellatio, said we couldn't be involved unless I was willing, I just thought it was odd b/c there was absolutely no context for it? I had never even seen his page before.

I just deleted and KIM, but I think he might have been some sort of addict. He was just so adamant abt the whole thing. It was weird.

 

[JustifiablyMe]

This is the main reason I can't do online dating. Racist others that say crazy stuff drives me insane.

THIS. My last online dating experience was so offputting because of this. All the stereotypes, stupid comments, etc. It's like you know it exists but I couldn't believe how blatant it was. I guess the internet gives them balls. The last straw was this YT guy (who looked completely normal btw) who asked me if I date black men, which is a stupid question in itself, and when I said yes, he wrote a long dissertation about how much he hates black men. Just a bunch of hateful garbage. The crazy thing is, these dudes contact you first! Like if you have all these stereotypes about black people/women, why even contact me in the first place? I guess they think you may be a token negro.

 

[AstroQueen77]

THIS. My last online dating experience was so offputting because of this. All the stereotypes, stupid comments, etc. It's like you know it exists but I couldn't believe how blatant it was. I guess the internet gives them balls. The last straw was this YT guy (who looked completely normal btw) who asked me if I date black men, which is a stupid question in itself, and when I said yes, he wrote a long dissertation about how much he hates black men. Just a bunch of hateful garbage. The crazy thing is, these dudes contact you first! Like if you have all these stereotypes about black people/women, why even contact me in the first place? I guess they think you may be a token negro.

In some weird sick way, they want to be proven wrong.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

I still remember this dude from way back in the black planet days who used to visit my page constantly but never say anything. He approached me on yahoo messenger acting like he randomly ran across me, but as soon as I saw the pic, I knew exactly who he was.

Anyway, we're chatting and this dude hit me with some line talking about he's lonely and just wants someone to cuddle and he doesn't even want sex, just a warm body near him. I semi jokingly told him he sounded soft.

And he went straight off on me talking about black bishes can't have ish, that I was poor, and that all black women have HIV and that he's glad I showed my true colors because he just wanted to give me the d*ck and he would have caught HIV from me.

The most hilarious part was this dude actually contacted me again about six months later, this time actually on Blackplanet and tried to act as if JUST ran across my profile. When I told him I remembered who he was he lost the charming demeanor and reverted back to insults about HIV and black women

But did this dude really send me a Facebook friend request like three years later? I dont even know how he found me. And he wrote a ghetto novela about HIV. I swear he has it and blames a black woman for giving it to him

You may need to stay off social media. How does he keep finding you?

 

[Oasis]

that dude is not even half way attractive so ''r u indian'' would have been promptly ignored.

-ive gotten quite a few marriage proposals
-ive been asked if i was a plus-sized stripper because he was suspicious as i had no full body pics
-i had a guy tell me it was pretty black girls like me who were the reason he was no longer racist
-a guy said that i had nice tits and he enjoyed (past tense) ****ing them.erplexed

i miss online dating.