I was thinking about my co-worker's incident and she was saying people (her single cousins) were calling her childish for not speaking to her hubby after the 6am incident. She said she has to calm herself down before she can actually have a adult conversation with him. I have heard the saying, "Don't go to bed angry!" but some people really have to collect themselves before they say and do things they will regret. So do you all find it hard to NOT go to bed angry, just for the sake of NOT going to bed angry?
Can you really not go to bed angry?
- Thread starter syze6
- Start date
syze6
You're co-worker's sitch is not some single out of the blue event. If it was then it would be easy to side with what her cousins are saying.
Her husband has shown repetitive inconsideration and shady behavior for a while (from what you've said). The 6am is the straw that broke the camel's back for your friend (although she should have nipped that ish in the bud a while back).
FemmeCreole
Island Gyal
hair4romheaven
Well-Known Member
We don't leave the house angry or go to sleep angry at each other.
Fine 4s
Well-Known Member
What do you mean by 'go to bed angry' as in seething, frowning, wishing they would leave you alone or in some cases leave the planet lol? Because I can understand not going to bed like this. But if you all mean that the problem no longer exists by the time you go to sleep, that is definitely not always possible!
Sleep provides the 'cooling off' period some people need to process their thoughts. I'm not one of those people lol
Sleep provides the 'cooling off' period some people need to process their thoughts. I'm not one of those people lol
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LOL. My SO will hash things out till approximately 11pm at latest. If he has work the next day then he's extremely practical with going to bed on time which used to bug me so much
Lucky we don't tend to have those types of arguments anymore because I find it hard to sleep while something has started then stopped.
DarkJoy
Bent. Not Broken.
My grandparents had a big fight one night so my granddad came to stay with us that night.
He had a massive heart attack and died in his sleep. My grandmother never forgave herself and had severe health problems from then on.
So no, I do not go to bed angry. I try to at least resolve the anger before we close our eyes for the night and leave the house.
He had a massive heart attack and died in his sleep. My grandmother never forgave herself and had severe health problems from then on.
So no, I do not go to bed angry. I try to at least resolve the anger before we close our eyes for the night and leave the house.
Fine 4s
Well-Known Member
LeftRightRepeat
Well-Known Member
I hold grudges. Maybe it is the Aries in me..but I can go to bed angry.
For several nights..
I'm aries too, and I'm the same way...:scratchch
DarkJoy
Bent. Not Broken.
Right. They had been married 40 years. She was never the same and it was so unresolved because from my understanding (I was only 4) her last words to him were the horrible things she screamed at his back as he left the house to come stay with us. And then he was dead less than 3 hours later.
If we can't resolved the issue before bed or leaving the house, I make it a point to resolved the anger at the least. Usually anger is just hurt and THAT at the least can be talked and cuddled out for 99% of minor scraps we have with our SOs
ScorpioBeauty09
Well-Known Member
I hold grudges. Maybe it is the Aries in me..but I can go to bed angry.
For several nights..
That's interesting because my dad's an Aries and if he and my mom will have an argument he'll go to sleep, wake up having forgotten all about it and my mom (Libra) is like 'I'm still mad at you!" Depending on how big the argument was of course.
If I'm mad, going to sleep is one of the best things I can do because the next morning I'm likely to have moved past it or be willing to talk about it rationally and not from emotion. Maybe it's the Scorpio in me but I can be mad at someone close to me yet still make it clear I love them.
MD_Lady
Well-Known Member
I'm less of a "don't go to bed angry" person and more of a "calm down to communicate effectively" person. If DH and I can simmer down and have an "adult conversation" before bed, that's great, but it doesn't always happen that way. I'd rather be respectful towards my husband in the morning than insincere in the evening.
MD_Lady
Well-Known Member
I will say this, even though I could go to bed angry, I wouldn't want us to leave the house and go our separate ways without clearing the air.
I'd at least tell him that I don't want to argue any more, but I did want to revist the issue later.
sunnieb
Well-Known Member
I hold grudges. Maybe it is the Aries in me..but I can go to bed angry.
For several nights..
Virgo here. This is me all the way!
jade3
Member
I find that going to be angry has been actually good for my marriage. If I'm forced to talk while I'm angry, I'm more likely to say some pretty reckless things. By the time I've slept on it, I'm more likely to have a revisit the conversation with him without going for the jugular and saying things that I end up regretting later.
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