Are Nigerian Men Usually Rich And Romantic

[kanozas]

Choose a higher class, esp. if you are of a higher class and/or are educated. Not everyone is compatible and class often makes the most difference. It's all about values.

 

[LovelyRo]

I collected some data for ya'll...

Dude was charming, a gentleman, attentive, always paid, bought gifts, I never had to lift a finger around him, seemed genuine, would stroke the heck out of my ego, in church every Sunday talking about he's born again... still a heaux! And the fact that he was a different kinda heaux threw me off.

Btw- he's a British Nigerian... the accent had me in LaLa Land.

I'll stick to what I know.

ETA: He had money and he was romantic-ish

 

[Bunnyhaslonghair]

I collected some data for ya'll...

Dude was charming, a gentleman, attentive, always paid, bought gifts, I never had to lift a finger around him, seemed genuine, would stroke the heck out of my ego, in church every Sunday talking about he's born again... still a heaux! And the fact that he was a different kinda heaux threw me off.

Btw- he's a British Nigerian... the accent had me in LaLa Land.

I'll stick to what I know.

That accent will trick you every time sis.

 

[hothair]

I have some questions fam Cc @PretteePlease


Just seeing this:

1. What if his family introduced you to him?

Great. But it means nothing. You need to take your cues from him and be careful you don't come across as the choice of the family ie involving them in your relationship or discussing him with them. Be friendly with them but I'll be real. For most of these guys your relationship can be great either with him or with them.

Just because they approve of you doesn't mean he won't heaux and dump you or better yet treat you so badly you dump him while the family begs you to hold on. You need to get in the guy's mind and soul and keep it sweet but a bit distant with the family.

2.No nookie till?

Through the family? I say until you've set a date almost (depends on tribe) a Yoruba guy can impregnate you and still not marry you. You'll just be iyawo (common law wife/babymama) an ibo guy you want to play your cards right and make sure he sees you as a wife not a plaything/lesser being sourced by his family. I doubt you'd be talking about a northerner they tend to marry their own much like Ethiopians/Somalis or marry Egyptian, Moroccan or at a push Sudanese.

Don't sleep with him until you know you're in a committed relationship you feel has a future (instincts are your best friend, whatever you think is going on is what's going on). Unless you're in it for fun in which case ignore this entire essay.


3. How do you get rid of friends?
Make sure you're in a committed relationship and you want to be with his type (you must know who this dude is for real); spend as much time as possible with him, those friends tend to fall away when he gets wifed up; don't obviously pick which ones to get rid of. Just keep him sweet and loved up at home and he'll do the rest himself. Most Nigerian guys LOVE attention and the women that get them (whether they love her or not) tend to be those that lasted in their personal space. *Disclaimer: if dude is an ain't ish dude please move on and don't waste your time. He'll always be ain't ish just may be attached to you.

4.How do you treat him as a permanent toaster?

You know that whole Ride or die, here through whatever? Thassa a no without a marriage certificate. He has to always feel like he can lose you and other guys want you. So if you have a career or school stay at it, excel at it and let it seem more important than him, you should also have social activities where you meet high caliber folk and mention any well off or doing well other guys and make sure they become a part of your network even if you're not friends with them. Basically don't close shop and keep your options of "better men" open.

Nigerian guys on a whole can be the sweetest, most protective providers but like any men, there are the bad and the good. I would stay away from dudes from poor homes mainly unless their family was a strong unit. There are a lot of cultural differences so you need to find out lots about his parents, siblings and see them in action that has been the decider for me on whether to bother or no.

 

[afrofaithful]

I've also been on a few dates with a British Nigerian...I have now stumbled on this thread lol

 

[LovelyRo]

I've also been on a few dates with a British Nigerian...I have now stumbled on this thread lol

Girl... just trust your gut and don't get caught up in the charm/romance/accent.

 

[Shiks]

Thanks for all this. I agree with all this. I met a couple yesterday, he is Igbo and his girl made him wait for a year as friends because she wanted more. They got engaged after 9 months of actual dating.

 

[beloved1bx]

It's so funny that I stumbled upon this thread because I just had a first date with a Naija man last weekend. I've never dated one before. We met for lunch, then went to a bar after for drinks. Then dude was saying we could go somewhere else and hang out more. I'm not trying to spend all damn day with you! I told him I had to go home and do laundry . I think he was surprised.

I'll keep him around to take me out to dinner and such but will try to keep him at arm's length. IDK which tribe he's from.

 

[free2bme]

Your typical Nigerian man is raised to be a provider and an alpha male. They love the thrill of the "hunt"and will do what it takes to get you. In the early get to know you phase, it can be a very heady experience. (Btw these are generalities, I know quite a few betas).

If you are AA, your best bet is to get with a 1st generation Nigerian American. As an African American woman, a Naija guy with bad intentions can run circles around you and chalk it up to "cultural differences". Trust me the assholes are great liars.

The Naija assholes don't come our way (Naija women) because they know we know exactly who they are.

Nigerian guys when they are ready to commit typically prefer to marry Nigerian women.

 

[DeepBluSea]

Interesting thread

A friend dated a fine arse Nigerian dude all through college. But his parents didn’t like her. I’ll never forget we were all talking and meeting each other’s parents at a graduation party. His momma and those sucking teeth and ehs. She was speaking in their language but I know shade when I see it. lol. They broke up soon after college.

But he was an interesting combination of nice guy and alpha male.

 

[Xaragua]

I am dating one right now and he is super fine and he has money. We have been going out for 3 months and he is super busy because of the work that he does. My question is this guy barely call now and he wants to color, but I am not doing it because of the emotional pace of the relationship I don’t know what to do now. He drops hints that he was interested in marriage, but who knows

 

[WhoIAm]

I am dating one right now and he is super fine and he has money. We have been going out for 3 months and he is super busy because of the work that he does. My question is this guy barely call now and he wants to color, but I am not doing it because of the emotional pace of the relationship I don’t know what to do now. He drops hints that he was interested in marriage, but who knows

He's busy, barely calls you but he wants marriage don't go together. He's dropping the marriage hint because he wants to color. He may possibly have a girlfriend(s) or wife.

Let him take you out etc but don't sleep with him.

 

[hopeful]

He's busy, barely calls you but he wants marriage don't go together. He's dropping the marriage hint because he wants to color. He may possibly have a girlfriend(s) or wife.

Let him take you out etc but don't sleep with him.

Agreed. @Xaragua my mom always used to say if Barack Obama can find time to call Michelle and take her out on dates, then other men can do the same if they want to. She often would say no one is that busy, not busier than the President of the United States. People make time for what’s important to them. He’s not that busy that he can’t call you consistently. If I were you I’d use him for practice as far as leaning back, reciprocating his level of interest etc. I would not take him seriously though. Ignore his words and focus on his behavior and how he makes you feel.